This was his fault. The fact that you were stuck here at a dusty, old desk, inspecting a stupid piece of mistletoe, was all his fault.

"Hey, [Name]," Joseph called out. "What do you think about Christmas?"

The question came out of no where. Was he trying to distract you from your job? After he had asked you earlier to study this damn parasitic plant for magical qualities since he apparently couldn't do it? Asshole.

"I don't like it," was your simple answer. You wanted to leave it at that, so you could finish your work and leave.

"Oh~? Why not?" You felt your brow twitch. "I thought you were the kind of person who would love anything festive, [Name]." Where did he get that idea?

"Joseph, I hate Christmas. It's a stupid thing humans use to excuse greed." Maybe that'll shut him up.

"Oh, I see... That's a very pessimistic outlook on life, [name]!" he remarked as he dropped what he was doing and turned to look at you, one hand on his hip. "No wonder people avoid you."

Your frown deepened.

"That pessimistic attitude of yours is exactly what makes everyone dislike you, [Name]! They can't stand how negative and rude you are."

Your hands clenched.

"Not to mention how violent you can get. You know, I've feared for my life a couple of times, [Name]! You really scare me when you're angry. Did your parents raise you to be such a monster?"

You slammed the mistletoe onto the desk with a loud "SLAP!" and whirled around in your chair to stare at Joseph. There he stood, no signs of malice visible on his face. Just a large, innocent-enough smile. Hell, most people would have been fooled into thinking he was just joking around or that he was just trying to help you with your flaws, but you knew him better than most people.

"Now, now! Don't get so angry, [Name]. I'm only telling you the truth, you know," Joseph chastised as he approached you with little caution. "I'm doing this to help you," he cooed. "Don't you want my help~?"

"Currently? I don't want anything you're selling, Cartaphilus," you spat. Who does he think he is? Stupid bastard!

The next thing you knew, you were being ripped from your seat with one hand around your throat, then you were being slammed against a wall. Pain shot throughout your body as you let out a loud, pained gasp. You had forgotten about your companion's inhuman strength.

"Don't call me that."