Interlude Two: Funk

Mr. Schue was smiling along with everyone else as the song ended. He stood up with the performers and said, "Um, yeah, great job, guys, but that's not really funk. Anyone have any other critiques?" His head turned to Kurt as he snorted loudly, his legs kicking as he covered his mouth, trying to be quiet.

"S-sorry," Kurt choked out, lifting his hands off his mouth. "C-can I be excused?" He looked over at Puck glaring at him, his arms crossed and started laughing some more. Without any other words, he ran from the room. As soon as the door was closed, he leaned against the wall and laughed loudly, almost afraid he was going to die from lack of oxygen.

In the choir room, everyone could hear his laughter echoing off the lockers in the hall. With a smirk showing that she was heading back to normal, Santana said, "I believe Kurt's saying that Puck and Finn are white as hell."

—

"Hey," Puck greeted Burt as he opened the door.

"You're just in time," Burt said, letting him in and taking him to the living room. "Good thing you got off work, huh?"

Puck groaned, "Yeah. God that place is absolutely terrible. And Mrs. Schuester looks at Finn really creepily…" He shivered and looked at Burt warily as they sat down on the couch, "You're not going to yell at me, too, right?"

Burt laughed, "Nah, I think you've learned your lesson about slashing tires. And if I know my son, and I think I do, you've already got quite the punishment."

Puck winced, remembering the severe amounts of yelling, hitting, nagging, and, probably worst of all, the cold shoulder. "Yeah…I'm definitely never doing that again," Noah said. He looked over at the TV and smiled, "Hey, looks like they're about to start!"

Both men looked to the TV to find McKinley Cheerios in formation off in Nationals. Front and center stood Kurt, his head bowed like the rest of them, a body microphone on his cheek. As the announcers finished introducing them, the lights turned on and a single note blared from the stereo. Kurt whipped his head up and started singing, "J'ai compris rous les mots, j'ai bien compris, merci…"

"Is he…" Puck's jaw was dropped, "Is he singing in French?"

"He is!" Burt exclaimed, grabbing onto Puck's shoulder like he did to the guys next to him months earlier at Kurt's football game. Kurt was lifted up in the air with Brittany and Santana on either side providing back up vocals, not missing a single note as he contorted his body into various shapes with kicks and poses. "Look at my boy! Look at him!"

"I'm looking! I'm looking! He's amazing!" Puck exclaimed back, freaking out right along with Burt. It wasn't even about the sexual nature of Kurt's leg stretching by his head or his cartwheels or splits or even his dancing with Santana. All that mattered was that his best friend was completely rocking it in front of a crowd of thousands of people singing in another language and being completely kick ass while doing so.

The two kept on hooting and hollering for their boy during the fourteen and a half minutes of French music, Kurt doing high kicks, spins, and lifts all the while, even helping with the other girls' lifts at times. Neither the two at home nor McKinley's team were surprised when it was announced about an hour later than McKinley had won finals. It was like what Burt asked rhetorically later that night, "With Kurt on their team, how could they really lose?"

—

"So, we need a guy to fill out the bass solo line of the song," Mr. Schue said. "It's pretty low…Finn? Do you think you could hit those notes?"

Finn shook his head as he looked at the sheet music, "No way, man, that's, like, not even human."

The girls and tenors sighed as Mr. Schue started warming the baritones up in their lower register, trying desperately to get them down to those notes. "I guess we can put it up the octave; it doesn't have the usual effect, but it would work."

Kurt and Puck looked at each other. "Tell him," Puck said, nudging his friend as they turned back to their teacher.

Kurt shrugged, "I could probably sing that."

The whole room turned to him, confusion written all over their faces. "Wait, wait," Rachel said, holding a hand up, "Just a few months ago you were talking about how you can sing high notes and now you can sing a bass part? I'm not sure I believe you."

"First off, everyone knows Kurt blew the contest, Berry," Puck said defensively, "Second of all, how about you wait for Kurt to actually try singing it before you judge him. He has a freakishly wide range, trust me."

Kurt nodded at Brad, "The note, please?" He played it and Kurt cleared his throat daintily, staring at the sheet music. "Tear the roof off, we're gonna tear the roof off this mother sucker, tear the roof off this sucker," Kurt sang, his voice indeed hitting the low notes. He looked back up, unimpressed with his classmates' shock. Back in his high speaking voice, he asked, "Can we move on now?"

The rest of the Glee club stared in shock for a bit longer. "I am so turned on right now," Santana said in disgust. The rest of the girls nodded in agreement, not sure they could look at Kurt the same way ever again.

A/N: Thank you so much for the positive reviews, guys, they're such a great help. Each review makes me want to work harder to get this updated and I appreciate every single one I've gotten. You guys are seriously amazing. The next chapter should be up soon!

Love,
xLessxThanx3x