"Mastah's NORMAL!" Gir squealed and jumped onto Zim's back, keeping him pinned on the couch. Minimoose squeaked and lay down on Zim's head in his own version of the painful hug that Gir was giving Zim.
"Hey!" Zim barked. "Unhand your master! Gir, seriously, that HU…" Zim's protests were cut off as Gir squeezed even tighter.
"You okay?" Dib asked the half-suffocated alien with a small grin.
Zim pushed himself up and pushed Gir off himself. Gir squealed happily and began to run around the room with no particular destination. Minimoose opted to stay on Zim's head until he was pushed off. "Ow," Zim winced. "I'm…fine…" he said slowly as the most recent of his memories finally were uploaded.
Dib saw Zim's face fall and he bit his lower lip. "I thought about deleting those memories but… I figured…"
"No," Zim said quietly. "I would have restored them by default anyways and then I would have come after you for messing around with my Pak." Zim turned to Dib, "Which you did anyways, stink-face."
Dib sighed. "I knew it! I knew you would hate me for this."
"I hate you ANYWAYS, huuuu-man!" Zim snapped. "Why did you do it! My Tallest wanted my Pak like that!"
"You're upset? Because he helped you?" Cyborg asked disbelievingly.
Dib shook his head in a silent gesture to the Titans that they were to stay out of the conversation. "I know, but you were actually competent! I did it because it's easier to keep you from taking over the world when you have a personality," Dib said with a half hearted, evil grin that he knew fooled nobody in the room, least of all Zim.
"Dib," Zim hissed dangerously. "You know what MY society is like. I know you hate me, but why bother to reactivate me if I was offline. What do YOU, you pathetic stupid worm-dirt-child, want?"
Dib sighed and pointed at Gir who was now sitting next to Zim on the couch and grinning in his own stupid way. "Zim, they want you. I honestly don't care. But you have Gir and you have Minimoose and they want you as you are. Since they're the ones who have to live with you, I figure they are the ones who deserve to make the choice."
"WHAT ABOUT MY CHOICE!" Zim yelled, startling everyone in the room. He was seething in a way Dib had never seen before. He knew Zim would be upset but he didn't realize how upset.
"Master…" Gir said softly.
"Dib-monkey-breath, I am an Irken. I am an incredibly SUPERIOR alien who wants to take over this pathetic spinning dirt ball you call a planet and destroy it for the sake of my empire. I am not, and I will never BE a GOOD PERSON, regardless of what you may think. My Tallest did what they did for a reason and it is not my place to question their ultimate decision," Zim hissed, tightening his hands into fists. His antennae were flat against his skull and even Gir realized just how upset Zim really was.
"I thought you were superior," Dib said in an equally quiet, slightly teasing voice.
"I AM superior!" Zim proclaimed, regaining a little of his spark. "Of course I am. But my Pak tells me to obey everything the Tallest order me to do."
"So, you're still loyal, even after they took away the only thing that made you… you?" Dib asked.
"Don't be coy, worm-brat," Zim snapped. "You know and I know that my personality was the reason I was named defective in the first place."
Dib raised an eyebrow. "I thought your ego kept you from seeing that you were a defective," he said, slightly surprised at Zim's insight.
"Dib, I'm not stuuuuupid," Zim sneered. "My Tallest just took away my personality after they tried to deactivate me. As much as I'd honestly LOVE to ignore that, I can't."
"You didn't answer my question," Dib said.
"What question?" Zim asked.
"Are you, or are you not still loyal?" Dib replied.
Zim gritted his teeth and clenched his fists before replying. "Yes," he said dully.
Dib frowned, "Zim…"
"I can't help it," Zim continued. "It's part of me, to obey. It's part of every Irken. I am loyal, but I'll be dammed if I report to My Tallest any time soon," Zim finished.
"Are you upset that we undid what the Tallest did?" Dib asked. "I mean… did you want…" he trailed off.
Zim looked at the floor and brought his knees up to his chest then wrapped his arms around them. Zim was very vulnerable at the moment and this action only proved the point. Zim, who ran on ego and an uncanny ability to ignore everything that he didn't want to see was confronted with something he couldn't ignore. He wasn't wanted as 'Zim' by his leaders. He was preferably wanted dead, and if not, just another soldier. Another number that could be ordered and expected not to mess up. Another, one of millions. No more, no less then that.
Everyone watched the quiet Irken intensely. You could almost taste the tension in the air as he mulled over his thoughts, coming to grips with his new, darker, reality. "I…" he finally started. "I want to be like this," he finally admitted, as if it was a bad thing. "I want my personality and my memories. I like being like this," he said softly, his antennae drooping. "I want to be Zim."
"Good," Dib said with a smile. "Believe it or not, I prefer you as Zim."
"Mastah's back!" Gir announced once again and leaned against Zim. "Yey," he said happily and stuck his tongue out at the corner of his mouth.
"All right," Zim said with a big sigh. "I'm done being unhappy," he announced. "I ZIM! Will now go home and begin to plot again. The Vertians can't take over this miserable planet while ZIIIIIM is here!"
"You're still going to help us?" Robin asked, surprised. "I thought you said that you were still a bad guy."
Zim gave Robin his best maniacal grin. "Of course bird-huuuuuman," he said annoyingly. "I AM a bad guy. I am an EVIL and POWERFUL Irken warrior that WILL continue to take over this pathetic little dirt ball you weak, inferior humans like to call 'home.' But, in order to do so, I must FIRST defeat the Vertians."
"You're still going to try to take over Earth?" Beast Boy asked. "Why?"
"Because it's fun," Zim replied haughtily. "And now ZIM will take over this planet on HIS own whims! The radioactive pants command it!" he laughed.
"Glad to see you can get over a life scarring moment in about ten minutes," Dib said with a small laugh as he stood up.
Zim's antennae raised slightly as Dib said this. One raised above the other as if he was raising an 'eyebrow' expression with his antennae. "What is the point of being unhappy when you can just ignore it and go about blowing stuff up?"
"Why indeed?" Dib asked quietly as he finished off his coffee.
"See, this is why I don't like EMOTIONS," Zim spat. "I don't like feeling bad. So, ignore it and move on," Zim said with a grin. "Now, I'm going home."
"We're about 200 miles away from our town," Dib said with a tiny grin as he filled his cup with coffee again.
Zim growled. "Fine, I'll just call the Voot and it'll be here in an hour or so," he sniffed. "Because…"
Dib cut him off. "Your SUPERIOR Irken technology is SO MUCH BETTER and therefore we must FEAR how incredibly AWESOME it IS!" he mocked, even copying Zim's speech patterns.
The rest of the Titans were highly amused and even Raven had to hide a smile as Zim turned several shades of green darker as he glared at Dib. "Shut your noise hole you smelly, big headed, jerk face!" he snapped.
"Actually," Robin said quickly, cutting in before Zim could pull out his gun. "It may be a better idea if you stayed here for a bit while we fight the Vertians."
"Why?" Zim asked.
"In case you actually end up getting caught, we're nearby. Don't forget, they want to capture you too and as good a fighter as you may be I don't think you can take on several hundred soldiers," Robin pointed out.
Zim crossed his arms. "Pfft, of course I could bird-human. You underestimate the AWESOMENESS…NESS that is I, ZIIIM!"
"While keeping Gir from getting himself blown up by the enemy?" Dib asked calmly as he sipped his coffee.
Zim blinked and glanced at his robot. "Well… I'd leave him at home," Zim offered.
"And he'd stay?" Dib asked.
"Nope!" Gir said proudly.
Zim sighed and glared at Dib crossly. "I don't need help, stink-head," he sniffed. "Least of all from you."
"I'm not offering it," Dib replied. "And I don't think they are either. I think it's more of a 'let's make sure our goal is reached' kind of deal."
"Yes, well…" Zim tried to think of something to refute that logic but nothing would come to mind. "What if I said I don't wanna," he finally stated, realizing too late that he sounded like a four year old.
Robin suppressed a smile. "We're not forcing you," he replied diplomatically. "We're offering. Besides, going to your town makes things difficult. This would help us more in the end."
Zim grinned, "So, you selfish human needs finally come out, eh, bird-human?"
"Oh yes," Robin replied.
Zim shrugged. "Fine, as long as I have equipment to make repairs and such."
"Then call your Voot," Dib offered. "It's like a mini home isn't it?"
"I already did," Zim said, rolling his eyes as if Dib was the dumbest thing he had ever come across. "I'm going to go out for a bit," he said finally. "I need to… be alone. Minimoose, Gir, stay here and dock the Voot when it arrives."
"Yes master!" Gir said in a gruff voice, saluting Zim while Minimoose squeaked.
Without another word, Zim left to go sort out his remaining thoughts.
After he was gone Dib toasted Robin with his coffee mug. "You picked up on how to deal with him quickly," he lauded.
Robin laughed. "Its like reverse psychology with a twist. Tell him what he wants to hear while making it seem like it's his idea. Difficult but doable."
Dib nodded. "I think he agreed so easily for another reason though."
"Another reason?" Starfire asked.
"I don't think he wants to go back quite yet," Dib said slowly. "In his home he has things that would probably remind him of Irk, of being a soldier and what his duties are. I honestly think the last thing he wants right now is to be reminded of what he is supposed to be."
"That makes sense," Cyborg said softly. "He probably also doesn't want to get caught by anyone else with his Pak back to normal."
"Mmhm," Dib agreed as he polished off his second cup of coffee. "I can't say I blame him though. If his leaders called he would be screwed. They would either try and outright kill him or suppress his memories and personality again. Either way, either outcome, Zim would be… unhappy to say the least."
"Why are we working so hard for someone who has told us that he doesn't like us and would just as soon kill us off?" Raven asked quietly.
Everyone was silent for a minute but Dib found his answer to come rather easily. "Because he's different," he said. "He's unique, a different person, not a good one but that's beside the point. As opposed to the rest of his race, Zim is himself. He does what he wants, how he wants and I think the fact that he is willing to go against what on his planet must be millions of years of rules and conforming makes it worth it to make sure that he somehow survives. It's almost a way to show the Irkens that 'hey, you can be different, it's allowed.'"
Starfire smiled and floated by the window to watch the sun set. "I like those reasons," she said happily. "I like to think that even though the race is terrible, there is something in it that allows for individuality."
"Nothing can be pure evil," Raven said quietly. "Just like nothing can be pure good."
"Exactly," Dib agreed. "Although if Zim heard this conversation he would have probably tired to shoot me about three minutes ago."
Robin laughed. "Oh well, at least we have our answers."
"I'm confused," Beast Boy admitted. "But… oh well."
"Think about it," Cyborg offered.
"He can think?" Raven asked sarcastically.
Robin, Dib, Starfire and Cyborg all chuckled at Beast Boy's expense while the green Titan seethed a little at the quip.
Later, after everyone had finally crashed into bed Zim walked into the Tower and looked around, sneering. If it had been any other time, he would have probably tried to blow up the place rather then stay with a bunch of humans and a Tameranian. However, given the circumstances, he wasn't ready to go home quite yet. His house was filled with Irken symbols, propaganda, messages and everything he didn't want to confront just then.
His home was his home but in the end it was just another product of the Irken empire. As was his Voot and as was, technically, Gir. However, these latter items were also Zim's own. Gir was his own 'special' robot and he was next to certain that no other quite like him existed in the Irken force. And he had remade his ship so much that it could be said that it was also his own. His Voot was made, and repaired by him as he saw fit. His house, while designed by him just didn't feel very inviting to Zim at the moment. And well, who could blame him?
Zim growled and rubbed his antennae irritably. He didn't like admitting that he had emotions, much less have to deal with them. At the moment he felt confused, hurt and betrayed and in his world it would have been so much easier if he could have just abandoned his emotions. He knew that was impossible though, and that in order to do that he would have to give up what was just given back to him. He already admitted that he wanted to be Zim.
Why not be Zim? Zim was obviously so much more superior and awesome then everyone else. He could be whom he wanted, act how he wanted and live what he wanted because he was himself and in the end that was probably what he wanted. He was Zim and that was damn well good enough for him and to hell with what anyone else thought.
Zim grinned in the darkness and pulled out a small handheld he had retrieved from the badly parked Voot outside. It had enough programming so he could continue his bomb as well as monitor the Vertian activity above him without getting caught.
Zim reveled in the feeling that spying on the enemy in the dark gave him. The night was his time. Every other pathetic human was forced to give into their biological demand for sleep and nourishment while he was free to stay up all night and plot. He didn't need food or sleep; he was the prime example of a superior Irken. It was just as well because he was allergic to practically every food on the smelly planet of earth and his lack of need for sleep gave him an edge on many people, namely Dib.
The night was his, quiet as you please with no one to bother him. Even Gir and Minimoose slept at night. Why? Their reasons for doing so were beyond Zim. As far as he knew, robots didn't need to sleep, but then again, robots didn't need to eat and Gir probably ate enough tacos in a month to sustain small third world countries. One reason Zim liked the nighttime so much was that there WAS no Gir or Minimoose to bother him. He could do what he damn well pleased without needing to worry about his wayward robots and what they were up to. Not that he cared that much. Really.
Zim smiled as he settled into the task of programming. It was a small escape from reality, but a welcome one. As far as he was concerned, he was over what the Tallest did to him and he was ready to move forward. Because that's what being an Irken was all about.
Zim looked up and stared out the window with a rare, thoughtful expression on his face. It quickly melted away into a maniacal grin as he continued to program the bomb. No, he thought, it was what being ZIM was all about.
I hope I'm not doing something horribly wrong here XD it's just that I got like... 10 reviews for the first 2 chapters then 4 for the next two. If I'm doing something you don't like, feel free to tell me and I'll see what I can do.
Anyways, here's Zim, getting over it. Yeah, he got over it fairly quickly. He starts annoying people in the next chapter. Next parts will be filler so I can start laughing again. Hope you liked it