The Random Megaman Parody Show: Second Offense
By: Metal Sonic EX
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Megaman series. Nor do I own anything else that they might choose to make fun of.
Parody #8
A Parody of The Matrix Reloaded
By: The X series
(In opening scene, Iris rides motorcycle off of a building and lets it crash into another where it explodes. A guard gasps.)
Guard - My God! She knows how to make an entrance!
(Moments later, bystanders are looking up as Iris and Sigma fall slowly to the ground while shooting at each other.)
Bystander - There they go again. That's the fifth time this week.
(As Iris, Zero, and X walk up to the crowd, everyone turns as Zero begins talking.)
Zero - A million times a billion to the square root of pi. Sounds exactly like the thinking of a machine to me.
(Minutes later, after the door is busted down, Sigma is standing there.)
Sigma - Zelo!
(Two more Sigmas appear at his side.)
Sigmas - Zelo!
Zero - Damn, no one ever lets me live down X6.
(After a brief fight scene, Zero hunches down.)
Zero - SUP-erman!
(He takes off into the sky. Then, in Zion, as Zero is surrounded by people, Iris walks off.)
Zero - Shit. Hey, I've got a solution to everyone's problems. Fuck you all!
(After some boring stuff happens, a shaded figure cuts his hand.)
Shaded Figure - I'm so emo. Yes, I am. That's probably why I haven't found Nemo!
(After he tries to kill Zero, but fails, a random person runs up.)
Random Person - The orphans wanted me to give you this. They said you'd understand.
(Zero opens up a cloth and there is nothing there.)
Zero - I understand.
(After pulling Sigma's hand out of his chest, he looks angrily at him.)
Zero - This isn't Mortal Kombat, asshole! It's more like Street Fighter.
(The battle begins. As Zero begins to spin around while running on the Sigmas, he gags, then begins barfing, spewing vomit everywhere. After the battle ends, he flies off and soon finds himself in a larger building.)
Douglas - Of all of the languages, French is my favorite.
Zero - Too bad they lost the French Revolution.
Douglas - How'd they do that, Mr. Neo?
Douglas - Both sides surrendered.
(Seconds pass.)
Douglas - Wiping my ass with silk: I love it.
Zero - Wiping our asses with your flag: America loves it.
(Zero turns and gives the thumbs-up to the camera.)
(A.N. I don't hate the French in any way, but I do find them to be exceptionally prone to insults such as this. Again, I'm not anti-French or anything. I'm just anti-anti-humor.)
(In the bathroom with Alia, she puts on lipstick.)
Alia - I want you to kiss me. Make me feel like her. -motions to Iris-
(Zero shrugs, then passionately makes out with her.)
(A.N. Another note: Layer is a prostitute and will burn in bloody hell for eternity. Never will she replace Iris.)
(In the large room, Zero stops bullets, then spells out 'You're fucked' before dropping them to the ground.)
Douglas - Okay, so you have some skill.
(During fight scene, a sword hits a statue's leg.)
Statue - My leg!
(It falls over and breaks in half.)
Statue - My back!
(On the freeway, Dynamo looks behind him.)
Dynamo - A pair of ghostly twins. A duo of homicidal gents. Well, fuck my ass… This is shaping up to be one hell of a day.
(As Middy phases out of the car, he stands on the road, then phases into another one.)
Random Driver - Holy shit! A ghost!
(He turns calmly to the kids, then looks forward.)
Middy - Wrong car.
(He phases through it and appears next to Techno.)
Middy - Right car.
Techno - Yes, it is.
(Later, after Dynamo dies, Zero sighs in relief.)
Zero - Finally. It's about time this prick bit the dust.
(In the room with Signas, he clicks a button on the remote and porn appears on every TV. He quickly panics and pushes another button.)
Zero - Spoil sport.
(When Zero reaches into Iris' chest and pulls out the bullet, she dies.)
Deep Voice - Fatality!
Zero - Aw, shit. Not again.
X - You found a survivor?
Random Guy - Only one.
(The camera moves up to the person who is above Neo, but it doesn't reveal who.)
MSX - Oh snap! I smell sequel!
Next time: Snake Man grabs his whip and returns as the main star.