Quick A/N
I am so sorry it has taken so long. First I had trouble writing it, then my poor beta got swamped with real life stuff. But here it is. I will try my hardest to get this fic moving again. This chapter will probably be the weakest because I had to wrap up the case part in order to move on to the actual romance, I apologise about that, but I promise there will be more good parts ahead. :P
Big fat thanks and delicious brownies to Annber03, for all her help and encouragement! :D :D
Seattle, August 2014
The station was buzzing with activity when Blake and Rossi returned from the hospital.
"Garcia's stand-in found a place that matches the description of the area Sarah Smith gave us" – Hotch turned to Alex for a moment – "Good job with her, Blake. We have a suspect named Donald Peters, and two possible locations. His home and workplace. Rossi, I want you, Blake and JJ to check his home, and Reid and I will check the workplace."
Alex felt sweet relief that she had contributed to this, mixed with the mounting anticipation and unease that always came when it was time to make an arrest. She didn't want to admit that she still got worried about making mistakes that could jeopardise the case, but yes, there it was. The ghost of Amerithrax, still haunting her.
Not now, she told her nerves as they were trying to run away with her like a half-tamed horse. Rossi, seemingly reading her mind but more likely just noticing the worried look on her face, said:
"It's another case, you're not in charge, and you know what to do. Breathe."
She gave him a thankful smile, although she wasn't sure she'd be able to breathe until this was over.
They went to get ready.
JJ was just finished putting on her Kevlar vest. She didn't seem to battle any nerves at all; her demeanour was determined, calm, and very competent. It was then that Alex truly saw JJ as the professional that she was, a strong woman who protected, and not a young college girl in need of protection.
But isn't it time you stop lying to yourself, Alex? You never protected her. It was yourself you tried to protect all along, sacrificing everyone else in the process. Just like Erin Strauss did. And as much as that hurt you, it was only professionally. What you did to Jennie was worse than that. Stop running away from your responsibility. You created the mess, you fix it.
"Alex?" JJ said. "You okay?"
"Yeah. Sure. Do you a hair tie I can borrow?"
JJ put her hand into her pocket and pulled one out and handed it over. It was a flashy neon green.
"Great colour, goes with everything," Alex joked as she tied back her hair. JJ smiled.
"Makes you easier to spot, if nothing else."
"I don't plan on disappearing," Alex replied, and this time she sounded serious.
"Good. I was never a fan of your disappearing act," JJ said, then reached out and adjusted Alex's vest for her. Had anyone else done that, she would have felt offended. When JJ did it, at least on this specific occasion, it made her feel like she was worth caring about.
"Thanks," she murmured.
"Sorry," JJ said. "I know you probably have even more experience with Kevlar than I do. It's just that fixing others' clothing becomes a force of habit when you have kids. I constantly have to restrain myself to keep from straightening Reid's tie."
"Well, you don't need to be a mom to want to do that," Alex replied as she checked her gun – that too was a force of habit, even when she knew it was loaded and secured – then holstered it again.
"Thank you both," Reid said behind them. "And for the record, Alex does straighten my tie every time I'm going in on a guest lecture with her. I've already profiled her with light OCD."
"Wait, I thought Hotch said we're not supposed to profile each other?" Alex objected. Reid shrugged.
"You weren't on the team then."
JJ had to bite her lip to keep the smile from becoming a wide grin. When Alex looked at her, they accidentally locked eyes and both had to look away to avoid laughing. It wasn't the right time or place for laughter and banter… yet for a moment, they both felt like Alex's bailout and the ten years that followed had never happened. For a moment, they felt like they were lovers and soulmates again, and both welcomed that feeling with a fervour that surprised them.
After an unpleasant ride on a bumpy forest road, they reached the cabin. The first thing that caught Blake's attention was the canoe, put up on blocks just like Sarah had said. A rush of adrenaline went through her body when she realised that yes, this was the place. Now they just had to wrap it up without any mistakes, and then, perhaps, she would finally be able to sit down and talk to JJ.
As if the thought drew her, JJ turned in her direction. They looked each other in the eyes again, only not creating a need to laugh this time. JJ's eyes asked her if she would be alright. Alex gave a slight nod.
"Ready?" Rossi said.
"Yeah," they replied in perfect unison, and stepped out of the SUV with weapons drawn. Rossi lead the way, rapping on the door.
"Donald Peters! FBI!"
There was no response, but a shuffling sound and muted noises – a TV, Alex thought – could be heard from inside. Rossi nodded to one of the local policemen, a big burly man, who stepped up and kicked in the thick wooden door as if it had been made of cardboard. The agents stepped over the threshold and split up. The cabin was small, but with several rooms, the worst layout possible for a task like this.
The room Alex walked into was a very small living room. The TV was on at Nickelodeon, and a little girl, about six years old, was seated in the sofa. She stared at Alex with enormous blue eyes, seemingly too shocked to even scream.
Alex hurried to put her gun back in the holster and hold out her empty hands to show she wasn't dangerous.
"Hi, my name's Alex. What's your name?"
"Julia. Are you the police?"
Explaining what the FBI was to a shocked child seemed impossible, so Alex settled for a simple yes.
"Are you going to put me in jail?" she asked, those large eyes filling up with tears. Alex moved so she could sit down next to her. She could hear Rossi making the arrest in the other room, which was reassuring. Suspect apprehended, no shots fired.
"No. Little girls don't go to jail."
"But you're going to put my dad in jail, aren't you?"
"Why do you say that?"
"Because he did bad things to those ladies. Very bad things."
"What ladies?"
"The ones in the basement. It's scary down there."
"Julia, were you with your dad when he took those ladies here?"
"Yes. He said if I helped him, he would try to find my mom again."
Alex thought about the decomposed body in the plastic wrapping, the one with the wedding band, and assumed that this child would never see her mom again.
"I didn't want to help him," Julia whispered. "He made the ladies scream. But I want my mom so much, and he's the only one who knows where he is."
"Your dad isn't going to hurt those ladies again, I promise," Alex said,
"My mom is dead, isn't she?" Julia asked.
"I don't know, Julia, and that's the truth."
The little girl let out a watery sigh, a prelude to a sob.
I'm so bad with children. It should be JJ in here.
Alex put a hesitant arm around her to offer what comfort she could.
"Did your dad ever hurt you?" she asked, keeping her voice as gentle as possible.
"No," Julia sobbed.
Thank God.
The relief made her hug Julia a little tighter.
A member of the local police force came into the room and walked straight over to them. She had a kind face, and when she smiled Julia actually smiled back, despite the tears that still rolled down her cheeks.
"Hi Julia, I'm Sophia. Your dad said you were in here. I'm going to look after you today. Is there anything you want to take with you? Toys or books or something?"
Julia nodded, slid right out of Alex's arms and down from the sofa. Alex, to her own surprise, felt a bit sad to let her go. She slowly stood up, turned off the TV, and left the room, unaware that the seemingly smooth arrest was about to get messy.
Rossi and three policemen were checking the basement, and Alex went outside, mostly because the cramped space was starting to make her feel a bit claustrophobic. JJ was leading the suspect towards the patrol car, and Alex was close enough to hear him speaking to JJ.
"You know, you look a lot like my wife. She said she was going to leave me and take my kid away. You know what I did to her?"
JJ didn't answer. Alex admired that. It was according to the book of course, but it was surprisingly difficult to resist sometimes.
"I beat her to death with my bare hands," he said, and he sounded proud of this. "I did slip her a Valium first to make sure she couldn't fight back or run, I regret that part. I don't think it hurt anywhere near as much as it would have if she had been sober. It felt so good to see her bleed, though. That fucking bitch. But you're all the same, you women. Think you're so entitled, the moment a man shows you your place, you whine about being a victim, overlooking nature's order. A woman's place is in the home, and it's a man's duty to keep them in line."
JJ made no comment, and perhaps it was the constant talking that lured her into believing he was properly subdued, but she didn't notice what was about to happen. Alex did, but was too far away to stop it.
All of a sudden, he jerked his elbow back in a violent upwards motion, hitting JJ right in the face. She staggered back a step, instinctively getting her hands up as blood began to gush. Alex ran the few steps, grabbed the man by the upper arm, and, acting only on rage-fuelled impulse, punched him in solar plexus. He doubled over with a wheezing groan, but then he chuckled, still bent over.
"Oh yeah, that must've felt good to get out, agent. We all have it in us, that desire to hurt others."
"No," Alex said. "I have no desire to hurt others. Just you. You'd better hope that little spasm of yours didn't cause any serious damage."
She shoved him into the car and slammed the door shut, in a very un-Alex Blake manner, then had to take a second to calm herself down. It was not good at all if she lost her temper like that. The last thing she needed right now was to get in trouble with Internal Affairs. But she did have an obligation to stop him if he attacked an agent. Alex could only hope she was in the clear on this one.
She looked around for JJ and saw her seated on the front step of the cabin, with her head leaned back. There was blood all over her face and some on the front of her vest.
"Are you alright?" Alex asked.
"Yeah. I didn't see it coming. Stupid."
"Do you want me to take you to the hospital?"
"No, it's just a nosebleed, it's nothing. I'm fine, hon-Alex." JJ caught herself at the last moment, and Alex decided to pretend she didn't notice JJ's little slipup.
"Let me have a look."
She expected JJ to protest, but she only took her hands away and let Alex inspect her face.
"Your lips are swollen, did he hit your mouth too?"
"Maybe. I don't know, it happened so fast."
"Well, it doesn't look like anything is broken, so that's good. Wait here, I'll see if I can find some ice."
"I'm fine, Alex," JJ insisted.
"I heard you the first time," Alex said. "I'm still going to see if I can find some ice."
There was no ice, but there was an unopened bag of peas in the freezer, and Alex took it out and gave it to JJ. The younger woman pressed it against her face, which was starting to swell up and bruise, looking like she wasn't so fine after all.
"Thank you," she said. "I think it stopped bleeding, at least."
"Good," Alex said.
"Damnit, it was such a rookie mistake to miss that move," JJ berated herself.
"If it's of any consolation, I probably would have missed it too."
"How is the kid?" JJ asked, abruptly switching the subject. Alex considered lying, but only briefly.
"She is damaged. Not as much as she could have been, but… yes. Growing up under these circumstances…" Alex didn't finish the sentence.
"Any signs that he abused her?"
"No. I don't think he laid a hand on her."
"He told us that he was going to. But that he was 'saving her' until she was eighteen."
"How considerate," Alex growled, and wondered, not for the first time, why she was still in a field of work where she had to hear things like this.
"And that was also his motive. He wanted to find a substitute for the mother until the daughter turned eighteen." JJ shook her head slowly. "He abducted three to see which one he preferred. He had decided to keep Cindy, and was going to kill Sarah. That's when she managed to escape."
Alex nodded. The last pieces of the incomplete profile started to fall into place.
"What about the rouse?"
"He did indeed use his kid as bait. Waited until he saw a girl he liked go inside, dropped off Julia at the playground, then went to the drive-through."
Alex nearly facepalmed. The drive-through, of course.
"And when the girl came out, Julia pretended to be hurt and look for her daddy. The victim went to help her, and then…"
"… then daddy showed up," Alex filled in for her. "He told you all this willingly?"
"It was a bit more than that. He bragged about it, Alex. He had no qualms about confessing, he wants people to know all the details. He wasn't going to turn himself in unless he got caught, but now that he is, he wants everything to get out. This isn't a usual case in any way. Normally we have a pretty good profile ready and that's how we find the unsub, hell, that's the whole point of the BAU! But this time it feels like we do the profile in retrospect."
She had lowered the bag of peas while she spoke, and now picked it up and pressed it against her swollen face again.
"Would you mind finding me some Kleenex or wet wipes or something so I can clean off all this blood? I don't want the others to see me like this."
"Sure." She got up. "JJ? Another thing?"
"Yes?"
"Can we have dinner together tonight? Just the two of us?"
JJ smiled. Even through the streaks of blood on her face, that smile made Alex's heart flutter.
"I was hoping you'd say that."