Author's Note: Finally over whatever it was that wreaked havoc on my immune system. Sorry for the late chapter, I'm doing my best but motivation has been lacking lately. I hope my American readers had a great Thanksgiving and any international readers had a great Thursday.
Disclaimer: I don't own Total Drama, the shuffled concept or the (most of) the characters.
And now, the reviews!
StarHeart Specials: Let's hope I live up to your expectations!
Piecesxoxo: Like I said in the past (can't remember who to) Sugar works best without her Ella fixation, which physically can't happen here. I'm glad you like Sky's development, I was really afraid of repeating canon mistakes there.
yeezynight14: Thanks! Again, I really think Sugar can be a great character without her fixation on Ella.
That British Guy: She kinda did. Sugar doesn't have the villain cred of Alejandro, or to a lesser extent Heather, so no one would think not to take her seriously.
RebelToasters12: No worries, you see how late I am... That's actually a reason I wrote her the way I did. I knew I wanted her gone early in the second quarter. So I slowly had her grate on everyone's nerves so that it felt natural, rather than a blindside (which can't happen as none of the villains are on the team) or doing something big and sudden that ruins the character (Cough cough Courtney and Gwen). And it seems people still like her so I think I succeeded.
Currernt Castmates:
Screaming Gaffers: DJ, Duncan, Harold, Leshawna, Sammy
Killer Grips: Heather, Kitsune, Shawn, Sugar, Victor
Sick of these guys? Too bad, this is a non-elimination week.
Episode 08: One Flu Over the Cuckoos
"Last time on Total Drama Action," the recap started by showing the teens in the prison. "Imprisoned in a world they didn't create," the team captains were shown locked in their cages, "Forced to ingest deadly foods," Sammy was shown dumping something into her team's food and Sky was shown eating the Grips' concoction, "and even to taste them twice," Victor was shown throwing up.
"Nonetheless," The Gaffers were shown digging their tunnel, "the two courageous teams clawed their way to freedom!" The Grips were shown digging their tunnel. "And a lonely Chef made a new friend..."
"I'm gonna ride you until your self respect can coat the inside of a spoon and you confidence forms defeat!" Chef was shown, and heard, saying to DJ.
"But while prison is perfect for the criminally insane," close-ups of Heather, Kitsune, Shawn, Sugar, Victor, DJ, Duncan, Harold, Leshawna, and Sammy were shown one-by-one, "the just plain crazy had no place," Sky was shown trying to hit Duncan with a shovel, only to hit Harold. "Which Sky found out the hard way," the athlete was shown walking to the Lame-osine.
"And with that we're down to an even ten," Chris said from the monitor room. "How will Victor fare now that his best bud and his girl are gone? Find out here, on Total Drama Action!"
XXXXX
[A stage light pops up in front of some fake buildings and turns on; a camera with a rat on top of it comes out of a manhole; another camera comes out of the hollow of a tree, along with some garbage and a very confused raccoon. A pair of hands claps a film slate in front of the camera, and the camera flies through the film lot; Chris drives a golf cart with Chef in the passenger side in the camera's path. The host grins and waves and the cook crosses his arms and scowls as the lyrics start]
Dear Mom and Dad I'm doing fine
[The camera passes through a tree and files down a road between the studio warehouses, dodging a farm backdrop and a sunset backdrop before flying through a costume rack]
You guys are on my mind
[The camera flies up the fake mountain and peeks over the edge to see a pool of water, then jumps in]
You asked me what I wanted to be
[As the camera lands in the pool, bubbles fill the screen and then disapate to show Sugar in her bikini with a large shark behind her. The pageant queen farts as the shark opens its mouth, then it chokes]
And I think the answer is plain to see
[The camera pans up to show Harold on a surfboard hooked up to some rigging. He tries to dodge seagulls that are shooting past him like bullets, only to take one to the face and be knocked in the water.]
I wanna be... famous
[The camera quick pans to the left, showing Duncan manning what can only be described as a seagull cannon with a sadistic grin on his face. The camera pans back to show Sky looking at the punk with contempt as he fires the rest of the gulls. The camera flies between them, then pauses in front of a large door as Sasquatchanawkwa runs across it in a pink dress and boa The door opens and the camera flies into a bright light.]
I wanna live close to the sun
[The light fades into a shot of the beach set where Leshawna sits on a pool chair. She is flanked with sharks in their own chairs The camera zooms in on Leshawna as she gives a huge smile.]
Well pack your bags 'cause I've already won
[The camera pans to the right and ending up on Noah in the confessional reading a book with a smug expression pn his face and his legs propped up on the table. He leans back and goes too far as he falls backwards.]
Everything to prove, nothing in my way
I'll get there one day
[The camera quick pans to the right again to show Heather and a bald and camo cap wearing Alejandro on rock pillars against a dark backdrop. The two have dueling sticks, Heather's is blue and Alejandro's is orange. Alejandro hits Heather a few times and she responds with a jab to his face, his cap falls off and the camera quick pans down to show the hat falling perfectly on DJ's head.]
'Cause I wanna be... famous
[The camera zooms out a bit to show DJ stirring a metal pot with a smile on his face. He pulls out a small orange bottle and sprinkles something in the pot, takes out a spoon and offers it to someone off-screen; the camera zooms out more to show he was offering it to Sammy, who giggles and kisses him on the cheek. The camera pans out to show Amy watching the scene on one of two monitors in another room with a look of disgust on her face. She angrily presses a button and is surprised when an explosion rocks the other screen.]
(Na nananana nanananana nananananana)
[The camera cuts to the explosion as it fades away revealing a slightly singed Shawn nervously looking around... only to scream and run away to the right past a zombie in familliar clothing. The zombie reveals itself to be Kitsune, who giggles to herself as he runs past. The camera follows him as he runs past the Lame-o-sine then stops at the vehicle.]
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous (Na nananana nanananana nananananana)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous (Na nananana nanananana nananananana)
[The camera zooms in on the limousine's window, which rolls down to show a smiling Mike and Zoey. The window behind them rolls down to show Victor smiling at the couple. He opens the door with an formal bow. The camera flies past a series of flashes as if it were going down the red carpet and stops at Chris in a blue tux on the amphitheatre. The host grins and opens an evelope, then looks over at a scowling dress-wearing Chef as he holds a tray of Guilded Chris's. Chris purses his lips and gives a look to the camera. The camera zooms out to show the scene was being watched on a monitor, then pans down to Gwen and Trent, the latter strumming the last few notes of the theme on his guitar.
The camera zooms out to show the non competitors on the center couch of what looked to be the set of a talk show, flanked by two double tiered couches. On the top left: Noah, Sammy, DJ, and Tyler. On the bottom left: Zoey, Mike, Leshawna, Harold, Duncan, and Kitsune. On the top right: Staci, Malcolm, Victor, Sky, and Alejandro. And on the bottom right: Scarlett, Sugar, Shawn, Amy and Heather. The feed on the monitor fizzles out and changes to the Total Drama Action logo]
XXXXX
The episode began with a shot of an owl at night. The creature hooted a couple of times before it suddenly sparked and it's head flew off in a mild explosion. The camera panned down and to the left to show all the cast returning to their trailers for the night, then focused on Duncan as a white hand grabbed his shoulder. He turned around to see Kitsune glaring at him. "What ticked you off?" He asked.
"You did," she answered. "You said you were gonna stop egging on Sky."
"I said I'd stop when it stopped being fun," he corrected. "It didn't."
"You were almost kicked off tonight!" The fox lover accused.
"But I wasn't," he reminded her. "Seriously babe stop worrying over me."
"Fine," she spat out and stormed over to her trailer and tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge. "Of course. It's locked," she muttered to herself.
"Hey!" Duncan yelled in frustration as he pulled on the door to the boy's trailer. "Who locked the door?!"
"You just gotta ram the thing," Sugar said to them. "Like this!" She ran headfirst into the girls' trailer... and bounced off with a pained grunt.
The sound of sirens caught their attention, and the camera pulled back to show an ambulance speed onto the scene, open the back doors, leave behind a stretcher with a body-like shape resting underneath a cloth, and drive off. The cast gasped at the gurney.
"Eww, what is that?" Heather asked in disgust as the cast walked closer to the sheet. "A dead body?"
"L-let's hope it stays dead," Shawn said nervously. The figure sat up and revealed itself to be Chris on a pile of books. Shawn screamed for a second, then passed out in fright.
"Aw man, I only got one of you to pass out," Chris said in disappointment. "Anyway," he held up a book, "I'm here to prep you plucky ducks for our most awesome challenge yet! These textbooks contain the sum total of eight years of med school," he tossed a book over to Duncan, "and everybody gets one because tomorrow, we're gonna play doctor!" The punk rolled his eyes.
XXX
"I hate doctors," Duncan told the confessional, then crossed his arms. "They just like telling people stuff they don't wanna hear like, 'Don't pick at that scab,' or 'If you eat nothing but pickled eggs you'll die." He uncrossed his arms and said, "Nobody tells me what to do." He shrugged and added, "But I think I can fake it for a day."
XXX
"I'm actually a little worried," Sammy confessed. "After making the finale last time, I know that when a challenge sounds harmless, something major's gonna happen. But I don't wanna draw too much attention to myself. I'm already the last of the Final Four still in the game. But on the other hand, I don't wanna seem too useless either." She brought a hand to her chin and said, "But I think I can do that with this challenge, assuming Chris doesn't find a way to hurt us or make us hurt each other."
XXX
"To win this challenge," Chris explained as the camera cut back to the cast, "you're gonna wanna remember the entire contents of these textbooks. By morning."
"But it's already so late!" Heather complained.
"You got that right!" Chris replied. Chef, wearing a visor, drove onto the scene in a golf cart with a pizza on the roof. "And what med school all nighter would be complete without pizza?" The cook handed a stack of pizza boxes to Victor, who took a deep sniff.
"Oh my," he said. "That smells heavenly!"
"Smells like a trick to me," Kitsune commented.
"Call it method acting," the host corrected. "Med school students eat way more pizza than the average human, or even Sugar," he chuckled as he climbed onto the cart. "So dig in, there's plenty more where that came from." Chef drove off.
"So..." Sammy said awkwardly. "Who wants to test it?"
"I got it," Heather said walking to the passed out Shawn with a slice. "Hey! Shawn! Wake up!" She yelled waving the slice above his face. The survivalist woke up, grabbed the slice, and ate it.
"Holy crap!" He exclaimed. "That tastes amazing!"
"So either it's poisoned or Chef didn't cook this," Kitsune reasoned.
"Well then who did?" Heather asked.
\
The camera flashed to uncooked pizza crust being tossed in the kitchen. The camera pulled out to show DJ and Chef cooking the pizzas. "Keep'em comin'" Chef ordered. "I'll add the final cheesy touch," he said deviously while holding up a can of Parmesan.
"My team's gonna wonder where I am," DJ complained.
"That's right," Chef confirmed. "Your team. Now that you got rid of the annoying short girl, you're in charge. So you need to think about how you plan to lead." He stopped and suddenly added, "After you help me make these pies." DJ had a pensive look on his face as he kept spinning the dough.
\
The camera flashed to the Grips outside the trailers and zoomed in on the left side of the fire, where Sugar, Shawn, and Heather were sitting. "We need to talk about who to vote for next time we lose," Heather whispered to her alliance.
"How about Victor?" Sugar asked.
"Why him?" Heather asked with a raised eyebrow.
"'Cause he's all polite and junk. And in pageants, girls like that never can be trusted."
"But this isn't a pageant," Shawn protested. "And Victor's not a girl."
Sugar blinked. "I don't get it."
XXX
"Upside to being allied with Sugar," Heather said to the confessional. "She's so dumb that she's easy to manipulate. "Downside? She's so dumb."
XXX
"That should put some ideas into her head without thinkin' of me as a threat," Sugar confessed. "It's easy to trick someone when they think they're smarter than you."
XXX
The static cut to Kitsune sighing. "Can you please stop sighing every other minute?" Heather asked.
"What is wrong?" Victor asked in concern.
"I'm just gonna go study in the trailer," the goofball announced. "I doubt you want to be around me while I'm moping about Duncan." She walked over to the trailer with her book.
XXX
"I'm upset about Duncan," Kitsune explained. "You saw how he just brushed me off like that, assuming it wasn't edited out," she said briefly looking to the side. She looked back at the camera and said, "I always thought we were perfect for each other because we both like pranks and jokes. But I also thought Victor and Sky were perfect..."
XXX
"The uncertain status of my relationship with Sky has demoralized me a fair bit," Victor confessed. "But as team captain, I must not let it affect my performance in challenges. However, if others need some time alone, then I see no reason not to let them have it."
XXX
The static cut to the Gaffers, minus DJ, in the craft tent sitting, studying and eating around a table. "This pie is rad!" Duncan commented with a slice in one hand and a book in the other. "Who knew Chef could rock the 'za?"
"Aren't you having any Leshawna?" Harold asked. Her eyes widened and she blushed at the question.
XXX
"I love pizza," Leshawna said in the confessional, "but me and dairy do not agree. And trust me, you don't wanna be around to see it."
XXX
"Oh well," Duncan said grabbing another slice. "No pizza for Leshawna means more for me."
"Save some for DJ," Sammy warned.
"He's your boyfriend," the punk countered. "You save him a slice."
"Come to think of it, has anyone even seen DJ?" Lesahwna asked butting into the budding argument.
"Here I am!" The aforementioned brickhouse said as he entered the tent. He sat down next to Sammy and gave her a kiss on the cheek before saying, "hand me a book and a slice."
"Dude, where were you?" Duncan asked tossing him the piece he'd grabbed earlier.
"Had to take a whiz," DJ answered seamlessly. "Now let's get studying."
"Well I'm not gonna sit here and watch y'all eat," Leshawna said getting up from the table. "Tomorrow's a reward challenge." She started walking out of the tent. "No need to bust our humps when no one's getting kicked off"
"Suit yourself," Duncan said with a shrug.
XXX
"Don't let Foxy know," Duncan said to the confessional. "But she was right. Now I'm the only guy on the team not dating a girl on the team, and I need to work extra hard to keep from getting the boot. I mean, I could try and turn the couples against each other but..." his eyes widened in realization. "I... don't... want to be... mean. Holy crap! Am I becoming nice?!" He asked gripping his head in panic.
XXX
The static cut to the inside of the girl's trailer. "Hey Leshawna," Kitsune said as she noticed the girl enter.
"What are you doing in here?" Leshawna asked in confusion.
"Moping," the fox lover said quietly. "About Duncan."
"Oh," the sista said awkwardly. "You wanna talk about it?"
"I thought you hated me," Kitsune said quietly. Leshawna didn't answer and just sat next to her. "I guess you could say this started when I first saw him..." The scene faded to black as she kept talking.
\
The camera cut to the outside of a studio before flashing to the inside, which looked rather dull and barren, save for two hospital doors. The cast, save for Leshawna and Kitsune, all looked exhausted. "So... tired," Harold complained.
"I ain't never stayed up that late," Sugar added.
"I don't know what you guys are on about," Kitsune mocked. "I feel great! How about you Leshawna?" The sista snorted.
"Can it Foxy," Duncan spat as Heather made a cutting motion across her throat.
"Mmmorning competitors!" Chris announced as he slid out from behind the doors. "Or should I say... Doctors!" He pulled out what looked to be a pressurized air cannon and shot at the cast, giving them stereotypical doctor accessories. Once everyone was fitted he asked, "Everyone ready for today's challenge?"
"Some of us more than others," Heather responded with a glare sent to Kitsune.
"You made your choice," the fox lover responded with a shrug. "And I made mine."
"Oooh tension," Chris commented. "My favorite. Let's take it inside," he said backing through the doors. The cast followed suit.
\
The camera flashed to a large overhead light before panning out to show what looked to be a hospital operating room. On each side of the room there was a tank of green liquid, a ladder and diving board, and a table with a fain silhouette of the host on it attached to a chain. The Gaffers had assembled on the left of the screen and the Grips at the right.
"Today's reward challenge is called 'Visiting Hours,'" Chris explained, "and only one member of the winning team will get to enjoy the reward."
"If only one of us gets the prize then why even bother trying to win?" Duncan asked.
"Because we're a team," Sammy answered. "One for all and all for one."
"But who gets to be the one?" The punk asked.
"Whoever did the most to help us win," DJ answered.
XXX
"So DJ's manning up now that Sky's gone," Heather mused. "Interesting."
XXX
"Chris you haven't told us what the reward is yet," Harold pointed out.
"You're very perceptive Harold," Chris told him. "Let's see if that will help you... assemble a cadaver!"
"Assemble a what?!" Shawn asked.
"A cadaver Shawn," the host answered in annoyance. "Learn to pay attention." He adopted his normal tone and explained, "These tanks contain the dismembered parts of two identical, and giant, cadavers. Each player will climb their respective team ladder, strap on the bungee cord," the camera cut to a bungee cord at the top of the ladder, "and jump into the tank with hopes of retrieving a body part." The camera panned down to the tank and then left to a table. "Any parts you find will be snapped into place on the platforms. When you've finished use those chains to pull the corpse to the ceiling and let them be reanimated by a blast of lightning!"
"You wan us to build a zombie?!" Shawn asked incredulously.
Chris sighed. "I can't believe I have to say this, but, I can guarantee that the reanimated FrankenChris will not attempt to eat anyone's brain. At worst, it'll kick you in the kiwis." The survivalist looked suspicious, but let the subject drop. "Now if someone can tell me how to treat someone with a bean stuck up their nose, we can get this game started."
"I believe one would administer two cc's of pain medicines and probe the affected area with a sterile swab," Victor answered.
"Correctamundo!" The host replied. The gentleman bowed.
The scene skipped ahead to the Grip captain strapping on the bungee cord and jumping into the tank with a yell. He was pulled back out and had not a body part, but an electric eel that promptly shocked him. He dropped the eel and grabbed the diving board. "Might I ask why eels are in these tanks?" He asked.
"Forgot to mention that," Chris said unapologetically. "Three zaps and you're out." Victor sighed and fell back into the water, this time coming back with a foot that he quickly tossed to Kitsune. The fox lover snapped it onto the platform.
"Okay next question," Chris said. "Your patient has an itchy red inflammation on their butt. Diagnosis?"
"Diaper rash," Sammy answered. "Apply ointment to reddened area to soothe inflation related discomfort."
"Correct," the host announced. Sammy smiled.
\
The cheer leader jumped off the diving board and landed in the tank. She was pulled back out with an eel, got shocked and tried again. The second time she had two eels, both of which shocked her causing her to ask "Why?" She plunged into the tank a third time and came out with a hand that she tossed to Harold.
"I got it," the dweeb announced before being pushed over by Duncan, who grabbed it and placed it on the platform.
"Next question," Chris announced. "Your patient's got a white tongue, red eyes, and their oozing gooey crud. Diagnosis?"
"I know this one!" Shawn announced. "Pinkus Eyeicus. Treat with two rounds of flopperty gibbitz!"
"What?" Kitsune asked in confusion.
"Absolutely correct!" The host announced, causing the goofball to look even more confused. "I messed around with some of the terms in the textbook," Chris explained to the camera.
\
"Here goes," Shawn said just before he jumped. As he was falling he looked up and noticed the rope at tied itself around the diving board. "Aww crud," he said just before the rope broke and he plummeted into the tank. The sounds of zapping and pained groans could be heard just before a foot was thrown from the tank and into Heather's hands.
"Shawn!" Heather complained. "My hair!"
"Sorry," the survivalist said as he climbed out of the tank... only to loose his footing and fall back in with another round of zaps and groans.
"Smells like earwax?" Chris asked the Gaffers.
"Pineappleitus," DJ answered. The host and brickhouse high-fived.
\
DJ cannonballed of the platform and landed in the tank, he came up with three eel, all of which shocked him.
\
"Fur between the toes?" Chris asked while pointing at his own furry toes.
"Stick two horse feathers up the whizbang!" Sugar announced jovially.
\
The pageant queen landed in the water and came out with a pair of thighs.
\
Leshawna placed a foot on the Gaffer's board.
\
Victor placed a hand on the Grip's board.
\
"Waka waka two by four," Heather announced haughtily.
\
"Sissypants McGee!" Shawn told Chris after listening through his stethoscope. The confused look on the host's face implied the answer was wrong.
\
Duncan used an arm to beat an eel.
\
Harold was shocked three times, but later managed to get a head and toss it to DJ. The Gaffers were only missing a left arm and hand.
"The Gaffers ahead by," Chris said and noticed the Grips were missing the same pieces and a head, "a head!"
\
Sammy came from under the water with a hand that she passed to Duncan. The punk noticed Harold nearby wringing out his shirt and used the hand to pants the dweeb.
"Not cool Duncan!" Harold complained.
"I beg to differ," Duncan said with a laugh.
Leshawna stepped in between the two. "Look here Mohawk. If you don't leave him alone, then you and me are gonna have a problem. Okay?"
Duncan rolled his eyes and said, "Whatever," before walking off.
"Ignore him baby," Leshawna told her boyfriend. "He's just mad 'cause he's on the rocks with Kitsune."
"Hey, Foxy and me are fine," Duncan protested. "She even said so." The rest of the Gaffers looked away suddenly.
XXX
"If Kitsune actually used the words 'it's fine' or 'I'm fine' or even worse, 'fine' by itself, then Duncan's in a lot more trouble than he realizes," Harold explained in the confessional. "I don't know a lot about women, but the use of any of those phrases is a sign than she's too TO'd to talk, or my name isn't Harold Norbert Doris Cheever McGrady V." His eyes widened when he heard what he said. "We can edit out the 'Doris' part right?"
XXX
The static cut to DJ emerging from the tank with an arm and hand. "Yes! Last piece comin' your way!" He said tossing the piece to Duncan, who snapped it on.
"The Gaffers have their cadaver," Chris announced. "It's time to start yankin' some chain! And be quick about it, 'cause the Grips are right behind ya!"
DJ, and Duncan pulled the chain into the as Leshawna, Harold, and Sammy watched with bated breath.
The camera cut to the Grip tank and an emerging Kitsune. "I got the head!" She announced and tossed it to Sugar who placed it and signaled, the rest of the Grips to pull.
"Heave! Heave!" Victor called out to his team.
"The Grips are still in this," Chris announced. "Whose cadaver will reach the top first? Make sure you come back for all the Total Drama Action!"
\
(Fade to Commercial)
\
The episode returned to the Grips' cadaver almost at the top before focusing on Kitsune and a sick looking Sugar. "I don't feel too good," the pageant queen complained.
Kitsune placed a hand on her forehead. "You've got a fever, maybe your digestive system's finally taking revenge on you," she suggested. "That wouldn't explain the sore on your arm though," she said pointing out the small red sore on her teammate's arm.
"When'd that get there?" Sugar asked. She belched and asked, "And when did I eat lemons?"
"Pardon me," Victor said, the camera cutting to the him. "But I remember seeing red sores, lemony burps, and fever a symptoms of a disease in the book."
"Page seven fifty-three," Shawn replied. "Mortatistical Crumples Disease." His eyes widened as he remembered, "And it's fatal!"
The Gaffers gasped at the conversation. "It's not just fatal," Duncan told them. "It's extremely contagious!"
"Well what do you know?" Chris asked as he back to the door. "It's time for quarantine. Bye bye!" He zipped out the door and the cast listened as the sounds of hammering and drilling filled the air.
The camera cut to outside the challenge area as Chris hung a skull and crossbones sign on the hastily built barricade and told the camera, "There's more to this disease than either team knows," before walking off and laughing.
\
The camera flashed to the outside of the studio, then faded back to the room where the challenge was held. "Something's weird," Kitsune declared. "We're supposed to believe that Sugar was infected by a fatal disease?"
"I can't die!" Sugar panicked. "I ain't even won Miss America! Or Miss Universe!"
"At least it's not a zombie virus," Shawn said in an attempt to cheer her up.
"Quarantine Sugar!" Harold ordered. "Now!"
The camera cut to Victor hastily blowing up a bubble. "Quickly, before we all perish!" He added. Leshawna, Heather, and Duncan picked up the pageant queen and threw her into the bubble.
"Oh em gee!" Sammy yelled and the camera cut to her. "DJ has a sore too!"
"It's gotta be some kinda mistake!" The brickhouse said trying to shake off the sore.
"Hey!" Sugar yelled. "How the heck am I supposed to get outta here?!"
"You're not," Kitsune answered as Harold and Duncan threw DJ into another bubble. "That would defeat the purpose."
"Then I'll find my own way out!" Sugar yelled and tried to ram a wall, only to bounce into another wall, and then another.
"Great," Heather said sarcastically. "Sugar's turned into a big dumb deadly pinball."
"We need to confirm no one else is infected," Harold told the others. "Symptoms of Mortatistical Crumples Disease include explosive diarrhea."
The camera cut to Duncan closing himself into a port-a-potty and saying, "Have mercy!"
"Itchy lips," the dweeb continued.
"My lips," Sammy said, "It's like, they're on fire!" She tried to scratch at them, but they swelled up.
"Sudden hot flashes," The camera cut to Victor having completely sweated through his suit. "Sea sickness," Heather was shown vomiting on the floor. "Speaking in tongues."
"ma nglktal i hist hwy ikle," Shawn said as the camera cut to him.
"And temporary blindness," Harold finished. No one else had the symptom and he asked, "Anyone? Anyone?" After no one said anything he said, "That's a relief," only to walk into Shawn and realize, "I'm blind!"
XXX
"Okay, I get that the show is dangerous," Kitsune confessed. "But it's still TV and we are underage. No way will Chris actually let us die."
\
The camera cut to Chris in the monitor room. "You'd think we wouldn't," he said to the camera, "but just imagine the ratings."
XXX
The static cut to the non-quarantined cast mates all lying on gurneys and groaning. "How do you feel?" Kitsune asked her boyfriend.
"Foxy," he groaned pathetically. "I feel like I'm dying."
"Well, you kinda are so..." She trailed off. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion and she said, "Hey Leshawna. You notice that we didn't study and we're not sick?"
"Yeah I did," She said walking over to the goofball. "I got an idea but I need to get a textbook for proof."
"You mean we," Kitsune corrected.
"Can't you do this with your own team?"
"And who should I get to help me?" Kitsune asked sarcastically. "The deadly pinball, the girl puking out her guts, the guy who's sweated out a small lake or-"
"All right I get it," Leshawna interrupted. "We work together to find the 'cure.' And I know how to do it," she said pointing to a somehow empty platform.
"I like the way you think," Kitsune commented as the girls headed over to it.
\
The camera skipped ahead to the two girls outside the studio. "I'll check the kitchen," Leshawna said.
"And I'll check the books," Kitsune finished.
XXX
"I may spend a lot of time goofing off," Kitsune confessed. "But I know when something's off. I read some of those books and about three chapters in, stuff started getting weird."
XXX
The camera cut back to the infected cast. Sugar finally stopped bouncing around the set and fell over in exhaustion. Elsewhere in the room, DJ was running around screaming, "Gotta pee! Gotta pee! Gotta pee!"
The camera cut to Sammy groaning and weakly scratching her lips. "My lips," she groaned.
"Never have I regretted dressing formally as much as I do in this moment," Victor groaned.
The camera cut to Heather in a corner writing something with a bucket next to her. "To my mother," she narrated, "I leave you all my many awards and trophies." She paused long enough to hurl into the bucket. "To my brothers and sisters I leave you... nothing. Earn it yourselves you lazy slackers!"
Leshawna and Kitsune burst into the room and struck a dramatic pose. "Mother," Harold said weakly, "Is that you?"
"I'm not you mother Harold," the fox lover said. "But I am your saviour. These books are faker than a startlet's hair color. The covers are just cereal boxes," she tore the cover off a book to demonstrate. Then her stomach gurgled and she looked worried. "That doesn't sound good." She ran straight to the port-a-potty and said, "Why?" in a pained groan.
"But we're not faking being sick," Harold said to the general direction of where Kitsune was.
"I know baby," Leshawna said. "But it's still a hoax. While she checked out the books, I went to the kitchen where I found this cheese," she held up the same can Chef had earlier in the episode.
"It just looks like a can of Parmesan," DJ said. "So what?"
"The 'what' is that it's not even cheese," Leshawna responded and tore off the top label, "it's itching powder and laxative."
"Chef!" DJ swore under his breath.
"Okay, that explains the itchy lips and diarrhea," Kitsune said having come out of the toilet. "And why Leshawna's not sick. But I can't figure out the rest of the symptoms."
"As far as the sores on Sugar and DJ," Leshawna walked over to DJ's bubble and popped it, then ripped off the sore. "It's a slice of pepperoni. Brotha needs to shower."
"First Brotha needs to pee!" DJ yelled. He ran straight to the toilet, and knocked down Kitsune in the process.
Sugar shrugged and tore the 'sore' from her body and ate it. "She ain't wrong. Now can somebody get me outta here?!"
"And when it comes to the hot flashes and blindness, I'm surprised Harold hasn't figured it out," Leshawna finished.
"Of course!" The dweeb exclaimed. "Psychosomatic Hypochondria!"
"Great," Heather spat. "Now he's speaking in tongues."
"It's just a fancy way to say that between no sleep, the challenge, and the studying, you all made yourselves think you were sick," Leshawna explained.
"She's right," Harold confirmed. "I can see!"
"Congratulations Leshawna!" Chris announced as he entered the room. "You just won the challenge for the Screaming Gaffers!" The Gaffers cheered at their victory. "And for your reward... Darn it! I forgot. Be right back." He jogged out of the room.
"Sooo DJ," Heather said to DJ. Sammy glared at the Grip but was ignored. "I saw you take charge today and I was seriously impressed."
"Well now that Sky's gone I-" DJ started.
"And with you dating Samey it's guaranteed whoever you vote for next will go home. I'm curious to see what choice you'll make," she said as she walked off.
XXX
"Ugh!" Samyy groaned. "Heather is like my third least favorite person. I know she's trying something with DJ."
XXX
"First Chef and now Heather?" DJ asked the confessional. "Why does everyone think I need help to win?"
XXX
"And the seed is planted,' Heather said simply.
XXX
The camera returned to Chris in front of the Gaffers with a serving tray. "As I was saying," the host said. "For your reward," he uncovered the tray and showed five pictures: A middle aged white man with a dress shirt and badge, a black woman in purple and green church clothes, a white girl with black pigtails in a black dress and beaming smile, a black teenage girl with large hoop earrings and grey shirt, and a white teenage boy with braces and wearing a wizard's robe and hat.
"Oh em gee!" Sammy exclaimed, "My lab partner!"
"Is that my parole officer?" Duncan asked.
"Yep," the host confirmed. "One of you gets a whole night away from this crummy studio lot for a spa night with your very best friend. So, who's it gonna be?"
"DJ," Leshawna said softly. "You're team captain so it is your decision. And whoever you pick I want you to know," she began to tear up, "I'm really glad you guys are alive. For-for a moment, I didn't know and I," she was fully crying at this point, "I thought I would lose Harold and.."
"You did win the challenge for us," DJ admitted. "I say Leshawna gets the reward. Any objections?"
"Nope," None from me," She deserves it," was heard from the rest of the Gaffers.
"Thanks Deej!" Leshawna said grabbing him in a tight hug. "You guys are the best!"
\
The camera cut to inside the limo with Leshawna and the black girl. "Lashniqua!" Leshawna said. "Girl it's so good to see you!"
"What have these folks been doin' to you girl?" Lashaniqua asked. "You've never cried a day in yo' life!"
"And I haven't started now," Leshawna said with the tears gone. "I just wanted to make sure I got the reward."
"Dang girl," Lashiqua said and the two dissolved into laughter.
\
The camera cut to Chris watching the scene from the monitor room. "Dang is right," he told the camera. "I hope they're gonna exfoliate Leshawna's attitude in the spa, or shove her morals in the sauna and give them a good detoxifying scrub. Will Leshawna come back with clean pores and a dirty conscience? Find out next time on Total! Drama! Action!"
(Roll the credits)
\
\
(Bonus Clip)
"You see all thestuff going on with Kitsune and Duncan and Sky and Victor?" shawn asked the confessional. "That's why I don't do relationships. Well that.. and the fact that way more guys die in zombie movies because of a girlfriend. And I don't see myself liking a girl enough to risk letting myself become a midnight snack for the brain munchers."
Author's Note Post Script: I hope that was worth the wait. Aside from the semi-comedic romp, we see some subplots moving forward with DJ, Duncan, and Kitsune.
About the challenge: Leshawna still won like in canon, but with help from an opposing team member. I also tried to make it clear that she figured out the cause of the 'disease' and that's why the Gaffers won. I know people didn't like her fake crying in canon, but it is a plot point worth fleshing out. I did tone it down a little though.
I'm just gonna warn you guys, Duncsune's gonna have some problems this season. And they both will have their own personal things to deal with. For now I started Duncan's personal subplot, him trying to avoid being the nice guy. I liked the idea in All-Stars but it was so badly wrapped up I wanted to do better and this seemed like a good season to do it.
DJ's also getting more confident about himself and more self-reliant. He's starting to not like everyone trying to help and/or manipulate him. Again, not sure of an end game there, but letting it flow where it wants seems to be working.
Sammy's lab partner is an OC that didn't make the final cut for Danger Island. Her name in Wednesday and she was labeled as, The Preppy Goth. The other's were canon, because I just noticed Sammy is the only non-canon Gaffer left.
And finally, we see a small bit of the Evil Alliance. Those dynamics will come into play later, I just wanted to touch a little on it this episode.
I hope people like my take on this episode.
I also have an announcement: At some point I will be writing a Randomverse version of Ridonculous Race. Some teams will have changes and I'll be adding six new teams, most from other Randomverse seasons.
From an author's perspective, this was rather .
With that I'm signing off
-TotalDramaFan14
RDA ELIMINATION TABLE:
15th Place: Mike/Zoey
14th Place: Zoey/Mike
13th Place: Amy
12th Place: Noah
11th Place: Sky