Uncle Tomo would be a tough nut to crack. Both Ojiros knew that they would have to be very delicate when announcing their newest family member to Tomoyuki. Thus, they had decided to wait a few weeks before telling the over protective uncle.

This was both to ensure Kazuma's presence and to give them a little more time to think on what they were going to say. Unfortunately, even with the extra time, neither of them was really quite sure how to break it to the man. So… they were just going to be straightforward and honest.

There was a baby on the way, they were married and thus perfectly in the right, and yes, Fumino was quite happy with the situation.

…

Both soon to be parents were still quite worried. Luckily, they were greeted by a brightly smiling Tomoe when they knocked.

"Kazuma Sensei, Fumino-chan! Teppei-Kun! Welcome! Come on in!" The eternally youthful woman greeted them brightly. Tomoe stepped aside happily and allowed her guests inside her home. Kazuma entered first and Fumino stepped in after him. Teppei tottered in at the rear.

"The meal is almost finished, I started the rice a little late though." Tomoe murmured as she followed her guests into a well-lit dining room. "Tomo isn't home yet, he said something about a disciplinary problem at the school. Apparently, there's a prankster on campus. He said he won't be long though. Please, go ahead and take a seat."

Fumino sat down on the fish patterned pillow with a smile. No matter the day, Tomoe never failed to be perfectly cheerful.

"Thank you, Tomoe. Its been too long since we've all been together like this." Fumino exclaimed with joy. It was rare that Kazuma was able to come home and spend time with their little family. But when he did, they always made sure to have at least one big, family meal with her uncle and Tomoe. It had become something of a tradition.

"It has! The last time everyone came over was for the party at the end of summer vacation. Ryuu-san took Teppei-kun at eight for bed time, but everyone else stayed for a while. We even got Tomo drunk, it was so much fun!" Tomoe called from the kitchen. She had left to go bring out the grilled fish and the shish kebabs. When she returned, Fumino could feel herself salivating at the well-prepared fish and delicious looking grilled vegetables.

"Fish!" Teppei exclaimed. He stared at the fish with hungry eyes and followed Tomoe's movements as she placed the dish at one end of the table. Then she set the shish kebab at Teppei's end of the table.

"Eww! Veggies!" Teppei cried out in childish horror. He scooted back from the table and gave the plate of skewered greens his best imitation of 'Hell's Ma-Kun'. Fumino and Kazuma smiled at Teppei before sharing a happy look with one another. Soon, they would have their own child to introduce the 'horror' of vegetables to. Certainly, Teppei was adorable and would always have a place in their hearts. But the thought of having their own child to watch and raise… it was tantalizingly euphoric.

"You should eat your vegetables, Teppei-Kun. Don't you want to get big and strong like Kazuma?" Tomoe asked.

"But Ma-Kun doesn't like veggies!" Teppei pointed out. He looked over to his idol for back up. Kazuma grinned back.

"It's true I don't like Brussel sprouts or eggplant, Teppei-Kun. But, I actually really like these vegetables. You see, these vegetables are actually super special super heroes. Do you see how these are on stick?"

"Uh-huh," Teppei acknowledged with a frown. He peered at the speared greens suspiciously as he continued to listen to Kazuma. How could evil veggies be super heroes? It didn't make any sense.

"Well, these vegetables are called a shish kebab when they're grilled with the stick. Do you know what's special about a shish kebab?"

Teppei frowned.

"No." He admitted with a pout.

"Shish kebabs are made with the most delicious of spices and then grilled over an open fire. While grilling, they absorb the smoky flavor of being cooked over an open flame. By the time a shish kebab is finished cooking, it doesn't taste like a bunch of vegetables at all. Rather, its like a super hero disguised as an ordinary citizen in the land of Vegetaria. A shish kebab gains its power through delicious spices and enduring the heat of a hot flame. When it comes out, its ready to save the day as a super hero." Teppei's eyes went wide.

"A super hero?" The preschooler asked in awe.

"Yep. A super hero." Kazuma agreed. His glasses glinted in triumph while Fumino tried not to laugh. Truly, her husband always knew the right thing to say.

"Ahhh…" Teppei murmured as he stared ponderously at the plate of shish kebabs. The group was prevented from further discussion of the 'super heroes' by a loud beeping. The high-pitched sound echoed from the kitchen and Tomoe immediately stood.

"That'll be the rice. I'll get it."

"Its okay, I'll get it while I'm in here." A young voice called from the kitchen. A moment later the rice timer was turned off and Tomoyuki appeared with the pot of rice.

"Tomo! I didn't realize you'd come back yet. Why didn't you say anything? I would have welcomed you properly!" Tomoe stepped forward and lifted the heavy pot from Tomo's arms. She frowned at the man as she moved to set it on a pot-holder.

"It's fine, Tomoe. I don't need a welcoming committee every time I come home. I figured I'd grab the rice when it finished cooking." The eternally youthful man attempted to assuage Tomoe's spurned feelings.

"You spend all day working hard. The least I can do is welcome you home properly." Tomoe set her burden down before putting her hands to her hips. "You're away all day and then you won't even let me do one little thing for you. It's like this every time I try to do something for you." Anger colored her tone and Fumino found herself frowning at the sight. The red head had thought that the two had gotten over their relationship difficulties back when Kazuma defeated Tomoyuki in a spar. For the two to argue, in front of guests no less… it was highly concerning.

"Tomoe, I don't need-"

"Bad Unca!" The childish anger stopped both youthful adults from continuing their train wreck of an argument. Fumino and Kazuma jerked in surprise as well.

"What?" Tomoyuki asked in shock. Teppei glared (pouted) with his fiercest impression of Ma-kun yet.

"Bad Unca!" The child repeated vehemently. "You being bad! Toma just want to love you!"

"Teppei-Kun… I don't think you understand-"

"No! No! Toma wants to love you! She likes loving you. It makes her buncha happy! But you won't let her love you bunchas! Bad Unca!" To the horror of Tomoyuki, Teppei's eyes began to fill with tears. The child was obviously very emotional over the subject. He scrunched his face together and squeezed his eyes shut as he sniffed.

"Its just like when Buncha left Ma-Kun!" The child cried out disconsolately. Fumino stiffened before pulling Teppei into her arms. She hugged him tight and murmured soft assurances into his hair.

Though she had tried to keep the reality of the situation for Teppei, Fumino's short term separation from Kazuma had stayed with the child anyway. If the two ever had an argument around Teppei, the child would immediately begin crying and beg them to love each other. It didn't matter if it was only a little disagreement on where to eat dinner, Teppei would immediately remember the separation and become upset. Over the year since the incident, Teppei's reaction to any arguments had seemed to be getting better as he learned that arguing wasn't always the precursor to a separation.

Now however, the child was inconsolable as he buried his head into Fumino's neck. Warm tears dripped onto her skin as Fumino rubbed soothing circles into Teppei's back.

"Shh… Its okay, Teppei… Shh…" Fumino whispered. Kazuma's arm wrapped around Fumino's own back as he curled his body around his wife and baby brother in law.

Across the table, Tomoyuki and Tomoe were horror stricken at the reaction their thoughtless argument had provoked. Though they had never argued in front of guests before, the two had been getting into an increasing number of arguments recently. Now, Teppei's honest words and tears felt like sheep shears on their souls. Their anger and hoarded annoyance had hurt someone they loved.

"Teppei… its not like that…" Tomoyuki tried to soothe the child.

"Yes, it is! She loves you bunchas and you won't let her. Its mean!" Teppei gasped out as he turned his head to peer at his uncle.

"I-I don't mean it like that, Teppei."

"But that's, that's what happeeennss!" Teppei wailed. "You're hurting her!" He cried. The boy fisted his hands in Fumino's blouse. Beside her, Fumino felt Kazuma shift slightly in preparation for something.

"Teppei-Kun." Tomoyuki began sternly. "These are adult matters. You don't understand what's happening."

"But-!"

"I don't think Teppei-Kun is the only one who doesn't understand what is happening." Kazuma cut in. "It was our agreement that you would wed Tomoe-san if I won our match, was it not?" For a moment, Kazuma's sharp words hung in the air like the stuffy smell of cheap incense. It was too potent and far to harsh, yet it was there all the same. When neither of the youthful adults responded to his query verbally, Kazuma forged on.

"So I have to wonder, why are you trying to push Tomoe-san away? Forgive me if I overstep my bounds, but I believe the argument I just witnessed is not a young one. In fact, I would even go so far as to say you are purposefully ignoring or subverting all of Tomoe-san's attempts to be a dutiful wife…."

"Kazuma, she-"

"Is a grown woman. When you left her, she was indeed a child in need of maturity and wisdom before making such a momentous decision. However, she was not a child when she found you again, nor is she still immature or quite so unwise. Today, Tomoe-san is an adult who is fully capable of discerning where her heart belongs. Her overtures of affection to you are not the displays of an admiring school girl. They are the love filled actions of a young woman whose heart is overcome with passion and care to the man she loves." Kazuma's tone held a sharp note to it that betrayed his anger. His face could have been set in stone while his grip around Fumino tightened. Tomoyuki's conflicted emotions painted his face with a frown and furrowed brow. The youthful man's gaze flickered away from Kazuma to look uncomfortably out the window.

"Now, I could somewhat understand it, if you did not like Tomoe-san in return. However… I very much doubt that is the case considering your drunken ramblings about 'the beautiful angel of youth'." Kazuma's stiff visage broke into a predatory smirk while an eyebrow rose in an unmistakable challenge. Tomoyuki blushed bright scarlet at Kazuma's very pointed reference to the last family get-together. Finally, Tomoyuki heaved a sigh and looked back at Kazuma.

"I don't want her to make a mistake." He admitted.

"Then don't let it be. Make her the second happiest woman on earth."

…

"Second happiest? Why not the first?"

"She'd have to be pregnant to compete with Fumino." Smugness coated Kazuma's voice like syrup on a pancake.

…

"WHAT?!" Alarm was laced through Tomoyuki's shriek like thread through a woven blanket.

Wedding invitations were sent out a week later. Though a bit of a gambit, Kazuma's intervention and news had invigorated Tomoe while pulling the rug out from underneath Tomoyuki.

Writing this was crap. For an entire week I had absolutely nothing to write, even though my update schedule said this was next on the list. I'm an INTJ personality. If something on my checklist doesn't get done, I can't do ANYTHING else. And then... when I need to be doing math homework... THIS comes out. What in the world? Like, I was SO not going to get into this kind of drama. Yes... it would totally match the amount of drama Faster Than A Kiss has in canon. No... I did not want it in my happy, light, fluffy, group of one shots. This stuff is supposed to be humorous... not in angsty left field. That... and I meant it when I said I did not plan to cover any of this material.

Like... this is almost as bad as that one chapter of Moon Phased Wizard where I had to keep deleting paragraphs of work because Harry wanted to mawl Dazai to death in the street and get himself arrested/executed. None of what happened in this chapter was ever supposed to happen. NONE OF IT.

... I hate myself right now.

Please review for my mental health,

~Blitza