Hey everyone, thank you all so much for reading this story and enjoying it: all the feedback has been really encouraging and I hope you enjoy the last chapter (also remember to put on suncream, I didn't and now I'm in pain).
Knowing that he's going on a date with Dazai again makes Atsushi both nervous and excited in equal measure. It's like they're going out for the first time again and Atsushi isn't sure how he's supposed to act. After talking things through it feels as if the two of them have more of an understanding but it's not as if either of them has explicitly said that they're dating so there's going to be some left over awkwardness. Realistically Atsushi knows that more talking is going to help but more than anything he just wants Dazai to kiss him again.
As he reaches the café, once again, Dazai is standing outside reading a book as he waits. He looks so handsome that Atsushi's already blushing and his heart is hammering in his chest. He smooths down his unruly hair, takes a deep breath and heads over. He can feel his entire body trembling with nerves and anticipation but just as he reaches him Dazai looks up and gives him a winning smile that makes all the nerves melt away.
"Hi," he says on a breathy exhale.
"Hey you," Dazai says, closing his book and slipping it into his coat pocket. "How are you doing?"
"G... good," Atsushi stammers. "You?" He feels nervous and Dazai's gorgeous face really isn't helping. He's pretty sure that Dazai can actually hear his heart hammering inside his chest. He should say something else, he knows he should, but he can't seem to get his brain and his mouth to work in accord.
In the end he doesn't have to do or say anything as Dazai tilts Atsushi's face up and kisses him softly. A moan sounds from the back of Atsushi's throat as Dazai's lips press a little harder. It's a short, sweet kiss that's over before it's begun but Atsushi is still panting like he's just run a marathon when Dazai pulls away.
"Sorry," Dazai chuckles softly.
"What for?" Atsushi asks breathlessly. He can feel his cheeks heating up as he looks at Dazai with slightly hazy eyes.
"I had told myself that I was going to wait until after we'd sorted things out before I kissed you again," Dazai says.
"But..." Atsushi asks grinning.
"But you're just so fucking cute that I couldn't help myself," Dazai replies and kisses him again.
"Oh..." Atsushi exclaims softly.
"So shall we go inside?" Dazai asks after a pause.
"Yeah," Atsushi nods.
"Okay." Dazai takes Atsushi's hand, linking their fingers together and giving it a gentle squeeze.
Atsushi's heart continues to pound as he follows Dazai inside. It's wonderful being with him despite the fact that somewhere in the back of his mind Atsushi desperately tries to remind himself not to get his hopes up. That things could still go wrong and that they could come to an agreement to part ways as friends but he decides to remain optimistic. Especially when Dazai presses a kiss to his forehead as the ginger haired barista prepares a slice of cake for them both, a hot chocolate for Dazai and a coffee for Atsushi. They return to the secluded table they had sat at the last time and Dazai takes Atsushi's hand across the table once they've say down.
"So," Dazai says after a deep breath, "we should probably talk before I just say 'fuck it' and kiss you again."
"Probably yeah," Atsushi says although the thought of kissing Dazai again makes his gut clench.
"I just... I just really want to kiss you again," Dazai says grinning.
"I'd be okay with that," Atsushi says.
"Good." Dazai reaches over the table and presses a quick kiss to Atsushi lips.
"I know I've already said it but I'm sorry I didn't call after we slept together," Atsushi says as soon as their lips part. "I tries so hard to get in contact with you – I wanted to see you – but too many things kept getting in the way and then –"
Dazai reaches up and places a finger to his lips to stop him in his ramblings. Atsushi looks up at him, confused, but the smile on Dazai's face is comforting. "Let's forget it," he says. "Start afresh and just forget everything that's happened."
"Are you sure?" Atsushi asks, his heart swelling.
"It's too much effort to keep obsessing about it when we both want to move on and try again," Dazai says.
A smile spreads over Atsushi's face. He takes hold of Dazai's hand and presses a kiss to the palm. "I'd like that."
"So what have you been reading recently?" Dazai asks as the two of them leave the café an hour later to walk around the park, all potential awkwardness that could have arisen utterly forgotten and ignored.
"Mostly uni stuff," Atsushi grumbles. "I feel like I've read John Steinbeck about eight hundred times now."
Dazai wrinkles his nose. "Sounds dull."
"Well after Kunikida basically tore my essay on it to shreds I kind of had to."
"Aww darling," Dazai says wrapping an arm around Atsushi's shoulder and pressing a kiss to his forehead.
"It's fine, I got it done in the end," Atsushi says.
"So is this like your reward then?" Dazai asks with a cheeky grin.
"Something like that."
"Well I would be utterly remiss if I didn't make this feel more like a reward," Dazai says stopping in front of him. Atsushi looks up at him through his lashes and teases his bottom lip with his teeth.
"I mean if you're offering," Atsushi says. Slipping back into the ease of flirting with Dazai is simple and now that they have decided to start afresh it's even easier. He presses himself a little closer to Dazai as long fingers begin playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.
"What did you have in mind?" Dazai asks. "Because I can think of a few suggestions if you're struggling."
"Oh yeah?"
"Maybe something like this," Dazai says. He tilts Atsushi's chin up so that he can lean down and press a heated kiss to his lips. Instantly Atsushi melts into the kiss, loving the feeling of Dazai's lips against his. He pushes himself up on his tip toes and wraps his arms around Dazai's neck who, in turn,wraps his arms around Atsushi's waist pulling their bodies together.
"Dazai..." Atsushi gasps when they pull apart for a second to breathe.
"Atsushi," Dazai breathes before diving in for another kiss, this time slipping his tongue passed Atsushi's open lips. As their tongue's collide a deep groan sounds in Dazai's chest that makes Atsushi's knees weak. He wants Dazai and that want, that desperate need is starting to take over once again.
One of Dazai's hands slips down ever so slightly so that it's resting on the curve of Atsushi's backside and he wants more than anything for it to slip just that little bit further. He can feel his cock stirring and he's almost certain that Dazai will be able to feel if they carry on like this. Oh god I want him, I want him so badly.
He just about has time to finish that thought before he feels a drip hit his cheek. Then another, then another and before either of them knows what's happening it's pouring with rain. They break apart and Atsushi laughs as he looks around.
"I think the universe is trying to tell us something here," he says.
"Not to worry," Dazai grins. "I brought reinforcements this time." He slips a hand into an inside pocket of his coat and pulls out a small, collapsible umbrella.
"You're a genius," Atsushi says as Dazai opens it.
"It's not very big so we'll have to get cosy if you want to stay dry," Dazai says with a cheeky grin.
"I don't see a problem with that," Atsushi says.
"So what do you want to do now?" Dazai asks, wrapping his arm around Atsushi's shoulders and pulling him closer under the umbrella. The warmth of Dazai's body feels nice next to the chill of the rain and Atsushi snuggles in further.
"What did you have in mind?" Atsushi asks.
"Well I could walk you back to your house..." Dazai says and it seems as if the sentence isn't over.
"Or?" Atsushi presses.
"Or we can go back to my place."
"A grin spreads over Atsushi's lips. He stops grabs the collar of Dazai's coat and pulls him into a kiss. He catches Dazai off guard for a second before he kisses him back with equal passion. They pull back and Atsushi instantly gives Dazai another quick kiss.
"Take me back to yours," he says.
"With pleasure," Dazai replies. He wraps his arm around Atsushi again, pulling him close and leads him out of the park.
The rain gets heavier as they go so that by the time the two of them get to Dazai's flat they're both soaked through to the skin. As soon as the door is closed Dazai sinks his fingers into Atsushi's damp hair and pulls him into a kiss. At once Atsushi clutches the front of Dazai's coat and kisses back. It feels amazing especially when Dazai takes his bottom lip between his teeth and drags them over it, making Atsushi's knees weak.
"Wow!" Atsushi gasps as they pull apart for air. "I missed this so much."
"I did too," Dazai says, pushing Atsushi's fringe back from his face.
"Well we're here now," Atsushi grins.
"And, as much as I don't want to sound like a raging pervert, how about we get out of these wet clothes before we both catch colds," Dazai says with a smirk.
"Are you trying to get me naked?" Atsushi asks, feigning shock.
"Maybe," Dazai replies. "Is it working?"
Atsushi hastily rids himself of his boots and takes a step further into the flat. "Show me the way to your bedroom and find out for yourself."
Dazai stares at him for a moment, the most adorable blush Atsushi has ever seen dusting his cheeks. He suddenly snaps out of himself, practically pulls his own shoes off and follows him, grabbing his hand as he goes. "I'll give you a quick tour," he says clearing his throat. "Kitchen, living room, bathroom." He points each of them out hurriedly as he leads Atsushi further inside the flat.
"A very quick tour," Atsushi laughs.
"Well what can I say?" Dazai grins. "When you're offering me you naked I'm hardly going to wait around showing you the boring parts of my flat."
"Good point," Atsushi says.
"Besides I don't remember you giving me much of a tour when I came to yours," Dazai teases.
"Ah but that's because I had an ulterior motive," Atsushi says turning to grin at him.
"And you think that I don't have an ulterior motive?" Dazai asks backing Atsushi up against the wall.
"Do you?" Atsushi asks although he's certain that he already knows the answer.
Dazai leans close so that his breath ghosts past the shell of Atsushi's ear. "Trust me, there is nothing I would like more than to have you naked and spread out on my bed, just begging me for my cock," he whispers and Atsushi allows himself to visibly shiver. Dazai's words make his knees weak and his cock hard and it's obvious just how much he wants him.
"Dazai..." he says on a soft exhale.
"Yes beautiful?" Dazai asks as he reaches up to run his thumb over Atsushi's bottom lip. "What do you want me to do with you now I've got you all alone here where we're not going to be interrupted by anyone?"
"Fuck me," Atsushi says, eyes blazing.
Dazai groans and slams his lips against Atsushi's in a frenzied, heated kiss that steals Atsushi's breath instantly. "You're so fucking perfect, you know that right?" he practically growls as he pulls back.
"I don't but keep telling me," Atsushi grins.
"You," Dazai says as he begins to undo the buttons on Atsushi's shirt, pressing kisses to his exposed neck, "are the funniest, sweetest, sexiest guy I've ever met and I can't wait to get you in my bed."
"Oh god," Atsushi gasps. His fingers grip the wall behind him as his knees feel as if they're going to give out.
Dazai gets Atsushi's shirt open, a slick grin on his face and pulls Atsushi off the wall and into his bedroom. "You look surprised," he says.
"I guess I am a bit," Atsushi chuckles.
"Why?"
"I don't know," Atsushi replies.
"Don't be," Dazai says as he pushes Atsushi's shirt off his shoulders, "and don't be nervous either. It's just me and I'm already hooked on you."
Atsushi grins and swiftly undoes the buttons on Dazai's waistcoat before turning to his shirt. "Then don't let me be the only one without a shirt on."
Dazai chuckles. "Sure."
Within seconds Dazai's waistcoat and shirt hit the floor along with Atsushi's forgotten shirt. As soon as they're gone the two of them are on each other again, kissing fiercely as hands start to roam. Atsushi clings to Dazai's shoulders, blunt nails digging into his skin as Dazai's fingers brush over one of his nipples.
"Oh shit... Dazai!"
"God you sound so fucking sexy when you moan like that," Dazai groans.
"Don't stop!"
"I have no intention of stopping," Dazai says. He reaches back and takes hold of Atsushi's wrists so he can prise his hands off his shoulders. He walks Atsushi back and practically drops him on his mattress where Atsushi looks up at him with huge innocent looking eyes. "But first I want a taste."
"Isn't that what you've been doing all this time?" Atsushi chuckles.
"I mean a proper taste," Dazai says, gaze pinning Atsushi down to the mattress as he hovers over him. He kisses Atsushi's lips once more before he begins a trail of kisses down his neck to his chest. He stops for a second to graze his teeth over one of Atsushi's nipples, making him arch off the bed with a broken cry.
"Dazai!"
As if spurned on by the moans and whimpers falling hard and fast from Atsushi's lips Dazai begins kissing down further. Hands find Atsushi's knees and runs up his thighs. Atsushi can feel his cock straining against his trousers and he's certain that Dazai can feel it too. Especially when one of the hands on his thigh creeps higher to begin rubbing his cock through his trousers while the other begins to work his belt and zip open.
"Hips up gorgeous," he says, looking up at Atsushi with a cheeky grin once he has his trousers open.
Atsushi complies without question, pushing his hips off the mattress so that Dazai can pull down both his trousers and boxers leaving him completely naked. A shiver runs through Atsushi as Dazai's eyes rake over him once again.
"I haven't been able to get this sight out of my head for so long," Dazai growls.
"Really?" Atsushi asks breathlessly.
"You have no idea," Dazai smirks.
"Then do something with me... ah!" Atsushi trails off into a low groan as Dazai's hot, wet mouth engulfs his cock. He bucks up but Dazai's hand pushes his hips back down onto the mattress to keep him still.
Atsushi's fingers clutch the sheets, his back arching as Dazai's tongue continues to work him up. He sinks his teeth into his bottom lip in a desperate attempt to try to stay quiet but the feeling of Dazai bobbing up and down on his cock is too good. His grip tightens so much his knuckles turn white and he cries out when he can no longer hold it in.
"Dazai!" he moans. "Dazai, fuck, please... please I'm getting close."
Dazai pulls off with a sound that can only be found in the filthiest porn and smirks up at Atsushi. "You okay beautiful, you look a little flushed."
"God please, fuck me!" Atsushi moans, unable to keep himself from crying out again as Dazai's finger ghost up the inside of his thigh.
"I love listening to you beg for me," Dazai sighs, pressing his nose into Atsushi's hair and inhaling contentedly. "You sound bloody gorgeous."
"Please... please I need you... now," Atsushi continues to beg in order to rile Dazai up even more.
A growl rips from Dazai's throat and he hastily rids himself of the last of his clothes before he's on Atsushi again. Lips press together, skin against skin and their cocks rubbing against one another as they begin to thrust against each other. The desperate need that has been bubbling under the surface all this time is finally coming to a head and Atsushi clings to Dazai's shoulders as Dazai's fingers sink into his hair.
"My god Atsushi," Dazai gasps as he pulls back for air. "I need you, right now."
"Then take me," Atsushi says before pulling Dazai back down for another kiss.
Once their lips part again Dazai leans over to his bedside table and retrieves a bottle of lubricant and a condom before returning his attention back to Atsushi. "With pleasure."
"You're well prepared," Atsushi teases.
"Well I have been hoping that this would happen," Dazai says.
"Fair."
"So do you want me to fuck you into my mattress or do you want to ride me like last time?" Dazai asks.
"Holy shit, fuck me into your mattress," Atsushi groans as Dazai's breath ghosts along his skin.
"As you wish."
Dazai squirts some of the lubricant onto his hands and coats his fingers in it. He presses kisses from Atsushi's knee, up the inside of his thigh and to the base of his rock hard cock as he slips the first finger in. Atsushi clenches around him in the most delicious way possible making Dazai weak. His fingers are long and slender and as he begins to thrust inside Atsushi feels himself falling apart.
"Oh god Dazai!"
A second finger and then a third is added and Atsushi is a panting mess spreading his legs wider. He can feel Dazai's eyes on him the entire time and he knows that he must be a complete wreck.
"My god you look so gorgeous," Dazai says pressing kisses to Atsushi's skin again. "I wouldn't mind having you like this and taking some pictures."
"Oh fuck, please," Atsushi moans, tightening around Dazai's fingers again.
"Please what beautiful?"
"Please give me your cock," Atsushi begs. "I'm ready and I need you."
"As you wish," Dazai says again.
He slips his fingers from Atsushi who has to bite down on a whimper, already feeling the loss but he knows that it's about to get so much better. Atsushi watches with heavy lidded eyes as Dazai tears open the condom packet, slips the latex onto himself before coating his cock in more of the lube. It seems as if it takes forever, every second they're apart is agony, but before he knows what's happening Dazai is back on him, pressing kisses to his neck as he slowly sinks to the hilt inside him.
A long drawn out moan leaves Atsushi's lips as Dazai fills him completely. It feels so good and so familiar even though they've only done this once before and Atsushi feels as if he might break. He clings to Dazai's shoulders again, as Dazai begins to thrust into him making him cry out loud.
"Dazai!"
"God Atsushi," Dazai groans as Atsushi tightens around him. "Fuck, you feel amazing!"
He shifts his thrusts ever so slightly making Atsushi scream, digging blunt nails into Dazai's skin. He can feel himself getting closer and closer to his end as Dazai's cock begins to hit his prostate with each and every thrust. He presses kisses to every inch of Dazai's skin he can find as he holds him tighter, not wanting to let go.
"Dazai!" Atsushi moans again.
"Yeah," Dazai gasps.
"I'm gonna cum..."
Dazai pushes himself up on one arm and reaches down to pump Atsushi's cock as he speeds up his thrusts, pulling moan after heated moan from him. "Then cum for me gorgeous."
It doesn't take much more for Atsushi's orgasm to crash over him like a wave. A broken cry of nonsense and Dazai's name leaves his throat as he reaches his peak. His entire body trembles as Dazai continues to pump him to make sure that he rides out the pleasure. As he writhes beneath him Atsushi tightens around Dazai's cock to an almost vice like grip that makes him melt.
"Oh my... fuck Atsushi!" Dazai groans. He buries his face into Atsushi's shoulder as he reaches his own peak. "Holy shit, you're so amazing."
"I love you," Atsushi whispers.
The words are out of his mouth before he can stop it and he slaps a hand to his mouth, wishing he can take them back. Dazai pulls back and stares down at him. Atsushi's eyes are wide as he realises that he has probably just said the most incredibly stupid thing ever and, worse of all, Dazai actually heard him.
"I'm so sorry," he says hurriedly. "I didn't mean that... I mean I did but I didn't meant for it to–"
Dazai pulls his hand away and presses his lips to Atsushi's to cut him off. Atsushi melts into the kiss and allows himself to groan softly, completely forgetting what it was he had been rambling about by the time Dazai pulls away.
"I love you too."
"What?"
"You did say 'I love you' right?" Dazai asks with a grin.
Atsushi nods, unable to get his mouth to work. He hadn't meant to say it, it's way too soon, but now that it's slipped out it seems to be going better than expected.
"I love you too," Dazai says again.
A smile spreads over Atsushi lips. "Sorry, that just sort of came out like that."
"I don't mind," Dazai says. "If you hadn't have said it I would have done."
"Really?"
"Yeah." He leans down and presses a kiss to Atsushi's nose. "Shall we get cleaned up?"
"Probably."
"Okay," Dazai says and goes to pull out but Atsushi grips him harder. Dazai chuckles. "I can't go anywhere with you clinging to me like this."
"Then stay here," Atsushi mumbles. "Don't get up."
Dazai laughs. "I can carry you to the shower if you want? Then we can come back and spend the rest of the day here, watching films and talking about books."
"That sounds perfect," Atsushi smiles.
Dazai presses another kiss to his lips. "Come on then gorgeous." He pulls out, drawing a breathy exhale from Atsushi's lips at the loss. After depositing the condom in a bin he takes Atsushi's hand and helps him up on shaking legs.
"Easy tiger," Dazai grins, catching him before he falls. "You alright there?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine," Atsushi grins. "Just a little unsteady at the moment."
"I can carry you if you like?" Dazai asks.
"You don't have to–" Atsushi says but Dazai doesn't wait for him to finish before he picks Atsushi up in a princess-carry. "You're really strong,"Atsushi giggles.
"You're just really light," Dazai teases, pressing a kiss to Atsushi's forehead.
"I just realised something," Atsushi says as he catches a glance at the book lying on top of Dazai's bedside table.
"Oh yeah?"
"I don't think I've ever asked you what your favourite book is," Atsushi says.
"No you haven't," Dazai replies.
"You going to tell me?"
Dazai pulls him into another long, slow kiss. "Never Let Me Go."
THE END