Summary: Reno will do whatever it takes to get what he wants. Cloud finds this out the hard way. A prequel of sorts to 'Snapshots.'

Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VII characters belong to SquareSoft, now known as SquareEnix… I think. Whatever the case, I don't own them.

Tactics

A Final Fantasy VII Fanfiction by ntc

Mission objective: Cohabitation with Cloud

Reno hadn't bathed in five days.

While this fact had nothing to do with the reason why there were currently five insensate ruffians sprawled out on the floor around him, it was, however, the reason why he was picked on in the first place. Reno hadn't bothered to change out of his Turk uniform and there were still resentful people who viewed the Shinra Corporation and anyone linked to it as scapegoats to be blamed for Midgar's destruction.

Sitting on the barstool next to the redhead was Rude, who knew better than to interfere when his partner was in one of his dark moods. Who was he to stop the inevitable if Reno needed to vent his frustration and those idiots had so kindly volunteered? They had misinterpreted Reno's state of self-neglect and obvious drunkenness as signs of weakness that marked him as an easy target. What they didn't know was that Reno was most dangerous when he was drunk. If Reno didn't care enough to attend to things such as self-care and personal hygiene, he damned sure wouldn't care about holding back when it came to a fight.

One of men on the floor was still twitching from the aftershocks of Reno's electromag rod.

"Barkeep!" Reno's words were only slightly slurred; which was a feat in itself given how many drinks he had consumed. "Gimme another glass of… um… whatever you have that's at least 40 alcohol!"

It took a few minutes for the man cowering behind the bar to muster sufficient courage to stand up and attend to the order. The bartender's hands were trembling so much that most of the vodka he was pouring missed the glass entirely and splashed messily onto the counter. Reno, in a grand gesture of magnanimity, decided to extract the bottle of vodka from the other man's nerveless fingers before it was dropped in sheer terror. Tilting his head back, he swallowed several gulps straight from the bottle. It burned all the way down.

Rude shook his head. "You're going to kill yourself if you continue at this rate."

"That's just great, ain't it?" Reno hiccupped and stretched his lips in a dreamy smile. "When I'm dead, I won't have to feel anything…" He scowled when Rude snatched the bottle from his grasp and pushed a glass of iced, clear liquid in his direction.

"Drink it. You'll thank me in the morning."

After taking a tentative sip, Reno immediately spat it out as if he had tasted something foul. "Ugh! It's water!"

"And that's just what your dehydrated body needs, Reno. That, and a proper meal." Gods, he was beginning to sound like his own mother. Rude tried very hard not to think about how his caring behaviour was ripping his masculine image to shreds. Damn Reno and his inability to take better care of himself. "What has gotten into you anyway? You don't eat. You hardly sleep… Well, unless you count those times when you've passed out after getting too drunk… You stink like last week's laundry. You don't pay attention at work. You're a complete mess!"

Reno did not answer him immediately, preferring instead to amuse himself by drawing random swirls with the puddles of spilt liquor on the counter top. Rude promptly removed his source of amusement by grabbing a nearby tea towel and wiping the counter top dry. This earned him another scowl from Reno but at least the redhead decided to give up and tell him what was bothering him.

"He's staying with that woman again," mumbled Reno abjectly.

Rude prided himself in being the only person on the planet who could possibly understand Reno's laconic reply. "You do know that it's entirely your fault, don't you?"

Reno tried to put on an indignant look but only ended up looking more wretched than anything else. ''What does she have that I don't?''

Rude raised an eyebrow at the tone of challenge in Reno's voice. "Aside from a kind, caring personality and a gentle smile that could light up a room?" Rude began holding up fingers as he went down his mental list. "Aside from beauty, boobs and the ability to make babies? Aside from cooking skills that wouldn't raze a multi-storied flat to the ground? Aside from...''

''Okay, O-KAY! I get it!" yelled Reno, pressing his hands to his ears. "Jeez, would it kill ya to be a little more supportive?"

Rude shrugged. "You asked, I answered."

Narrowing his mildly glazed eyes, Reno pointed an accusatory finger at him. "You have a crush on her, don't you? Traitor."

Rude fought down the guilty blush that threatened to creep into his cheeks. "You're one to talk. You're the one who's moping around like a lovesick fool because some AVALANCHE rebel would sooner disembowel you than look at you. When are you going to open your eyes and see that Strife doesn't want anything to do with you? Give it up already, Reno, while the two of you are still sane and alive."

"You're just as bad as Rufus." Reno slammed a fist on the counter; his eyes alight with stubborn determination. "I swear, the next person who warns me to back off from Cloud is gonna…"

A young voice rang out. "You with the red hair! You're Reno the Turk, aren't you?"

Whirling around to confront the next victim of his electromag rod, Reno snarled, "Who wants to know?" He blinked when he discovered that the owner of that voice was a curly-haired boy who couldn't be older than fourteen. Standing behind the boy was at least ten other kids of roughly the same size and age, all of them puffing up their chests in a puny attempt to look more intimidating.

Though the boy visibly blanched at Reno's murderous expression, he did not turn tail and run away, as any sane adult would do in his position. It was probably the false sense of security granted by greater numbers that enabled the boy to ignore the danger signs and plod on. "I, er, we're here to warn you to stay away from Cloud, you big jerk! 'Cause if you don't, you'll be sorry!"

Rude inwardly groaned when he saw the gleeful, manic glint in Reno's eyes. He turned his head away from the mayhem which would soon unfold and quietly sipped his scotch.

xXxXx

Half an hour later in an abandoned, dilapidated Shinra power plant…

"'IF YOU EVER WANT TO SEE…'" Reno read aloud as he scribbled on a piece of paper. He paused, frowned thoughtfully and nudged the bound kid on the floor with his foot. "Yo, twerp, what's your name?"

"You think I'll tell you?!" roared the incensed boy as he struggled futilely with his bonds. "Untie me, you asshole!"

Reno knelt down and rapped the top of the boy's skull with his knuckles none too gently. His actions were rewarded with a pained yelp and another string of threats and profanities. "I'll ask you nicely again. Your name?"

"Give me liberty or give me death, you creep!"

Rap. Rap.

"You bastard spawn of a flea-bitten Bahamut! If I ever get out of these ropes—!"

Rap. Rap. Rap.

"Your mother is a— Ow!"

Reno had given up on the use of his knuckles and had started using his baton instead. The corners of the boy's eyes glistened with impending tears.

Rude covered his eyes with his hand, as if he could not bear to witness the scene any longer. "Reno, I've never been more ashamed of you right now."

"If you're not planning to help me, the least you can do is not to judge me." Reno huffed as he began readjusting the power setting on his electromag rod. "Now, what would you estimate to be a safe voltage for a runt this size?"

"Gimme that before you hurt the poor kid, you big bully." Rude snatched the weapon from Reno's hands and pushed him aside roughly. "This will be the last time I help you out. After this, you're on your own, pal." He cast an apologetic glance at the boy currently glaring daggers at him. "Sorry that you have to get caught up in this mess, kid. I'll try to make this as quick and painless as I can." Securing a firm grip on the boy's kicking legs with one arm, Rude set about tugging the shoes and socks off with the other.

The boy's eyes widened with an increasing sense of dread as it slowly dawned on him what was about to happen. He thrashed even more desperately.

Under Rude's merciless tickle torture, the boy broke out in helpless chortles and guffaws, followed by breathless groans from the resultant stitch in his sides, which finally culminated in a weak, but no less enraged, cry of surrender.

"So, that's D-E-N… Spelt with an 'E', am I right?" enquired Reno as he continued to pen his ransom note.

If Denzel's arms hadn't been tied to his sides, he would have given the red-haired Turk the mid-finger salute. As such, he could only spit out a nasty suggestion for Reno to do the anatomically impossible before returning to licking the wounds on his injured pride in silence.

xXxXx

"A delivery service?"

"Yes." Tifa nodded her head eagerly. "And you could use the Seventh Heaven as a base for your operations. I've thought this through. Since I would be in the bar most of the time, I could always help answer the phone and note down any job requests for you. As for advertisement, we could put up flyers on the bulletin board in the bar or distribute them in the market place."

"I'm not sure about this…" Cloud began, but Tifa cut in before he could voice his doubts.

"You have a motorcycle that's ideal for the job, Cloud. Also, you've traveled enough to know your way around most of the major towns and cities on the continent. If you're concerned about being a burden for staying here, then don't be. With the income that comes from both our jobs, we could realistically look into establishing that orphanage that we've often talked about."

"This job would require me to travel a lot, wouldn't it?"

Tifa's emotions were conflicted when she saw Cloud's agreeable expression. On one hand, she was glad that Cloud was seriously considering her suggestion; on the other, she knew that his decision would mean long periods of separation from her. For Cloud to view being away from her as an argument for, instead of against, taking up the job… Tifa didn't know what to feel about that. Was she being too clingy? Was she somehow pushing him away without even realizing it? 'Oh, screw this,' she thought irritably, shaking off her paranoid and over-analytical self. She would be content with what she could get. At least, this way, Cloud would have to visit the Seventh Heaven fairly frequently. Whether she could get a lock on the blond's affections during those brief visits and stays would be a subject for contemplation for another day.

"I… I think I would like that," said Cloud softly. "Traveling, I mean."

"I thought you would," said the brunette with forced cheer as she ignored the twinge somewhere in the vicinity of her chest. She mentally ticked off several items on her list. There: accommodation, money, social service, a job that allows much freedom and flexibility… Was there any bait she'd left off her hook? Oh yes, the orphans. "What's more, the children would be delighted that you would be staying here. You know how fond they are of their resident, local hero."

"A fondness which, I believe, you're mostly responsible for," Cloud accused her. "I avoid them most of the time and yet they still flock to me like starving chocobos to gyshal greens. I bet you're the culprit who had been regaling them with tales of our life-and-death battles and my final showdown with Sephiroth. Some of those tales have been blown so out of proportion that I'm amazed that the kids actually believe them. What ever happened to the healthy cynicism that came from living on the streets?"

"Those kids flock to you because of your natural charisma, Cloud." Tifa chuckled at the look of disbelief on Cloud's face. "Don't look so skeptical; I'm telling you the truth. The children adore you and no, it's not because they've become enamoured of the legend like what has happened with Sephiroth in the past. They've gotten to know you as a person, and they like what they see in you."

"Only because they haven't looked deep enough…" muttered Cloud, looking uncomfortable with their topic of discussion.

Tifa wanted to believe that it was merely shyness that made Cloud shun those who would reach out to him, either in friendship or some other form of human bond. However, the more she got to know him, the more she came to realize that it was not so much shyness as fear, shame and self-loathing that drove the blond to a life of solitude. All her efforts to break through that shell of self-loathing, to convince Cloud that he was a better person than what he thought himself to be, had met with only failure. Even as she wanted to howl in frustration and shake the blond until his teeth rattled for being so damned complicated and difficult, she also knew that doing so would only make matters worse. How do you save someone who doesn't want to be saved?

"Er… Tifa, are you alright?"

Tifa blinked as she slowly regained awareness of her surroundings. "Eh? What?"

"Uh, you sort of zoned out for a while there." Cloud was looking at her with a hint of concern on his face. "I called your name earlier but you didn't respond."

Tifa tried not to blush in embarrassment. She really should keep a time limit on her ruminations and internal monologues. That, or learn how to multi-task. "Sorry. I'm just a bit tired, that's all. Didn't sleep very well last night."

Cloud seemed to accept her explanation and, thankfully, didn't question her further. During the lapse in their conversation, Tifa remembered that Cloud still hasn't told her his decision yet. "So, er, Cloud…?"

"Yes?"

When Tifa discovered that she was fidgeting nervously, she willed her body to remain still. 'Jeez, get a grip on yourself, woman!' Tifa mentally berated herself. 'It's not as if you're making a love confession to him for goodness' sake! And you're not stupid enough to make a love confession, because that would have him riding his motorbike at full throttle and halfway to Gongaga before nightfall. Great, now you've gone and made yourself all depressed… Happy now?' Tifa hurriedly proceeded to ask her question lest Cloud start looking at her strangely again. "What have you decided about…?"

The shrill cries of several frantic children interrupted her. "Cloud! Cloud! Tifa!"

Tifa was normally a gentle and peace-loving person. She really was. That was why it took her by surprise when she found herself developing the strongest urge to smash something, or someone, when a horde of annoying miscreants— the same group that she had dubbed 'her little angels' on a good day— surrounded them and began talking simultaneously and incoherently.

"Cloud, you've got to—!"

"We just wanted to talk! But that monster—!"

"It was all Denzel's idea! And now he's—!"

"We couldn't stop that bastard, Cloud! We tried but—!"

"Waaaahh! Denzel is going to die!"

"SILENCE!"

The terrified children stopped speaking abruptly at the bellowed command. Tifa realized that she was the one who had done the bellowing when everyone around her, Cloud included, was gaping at her in shock. She coughed daintily into a closed fist before continuing as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened, "Now, speak up one at a time. Otherwise, Cloud and I would have trouble understanding what you're trying to tell us."

One boy timidly stepped out from the crowd and handed over a folded piece of paper to Cloud. "He told us to give you this."

One of Cloud's eyebrows started twitching violently even before he read what was on the paper.

xXxXx

After the stitch had left his sides, Denzel resumed his verbal attack on his red-haired kidnapper. Nothing was sacred as the curly-haired boy made rude, derogatory comments about everything from the species of the Turk's ancestors to the overpowering nature of his body odour.

Reno pulled his lips away from his teeth, revealing a most sinister-looking sneer. "Don't make me gag you, brat. And just so you know, the closest thing I have to a gag is my sock which, by the way, hasn't seen the inside of a washing machine since the beginning of last month."

Denzel quietened down immediately. Exhausted from yelling almost continuously for the past hour, the boy flopped onto the floor and laid still. However, stubborn, defiant fury still burned in his eyes.

Five minutes passed in relative silence. Just when Reno thought he could get some peace at last, the boy had to spoil everything by opening his mouth again.

"Why do you hate him so much?" Denzel demanded angrily.

Reno's expression swung between irritation and confusion. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about your repeated evil plans to force Cloud out of town!" The boy bristled when Reno only looked more confused. "What has he ever done to you? Why do you hate him so?"

"What ever gave you the idea that I'm trying to run him out of town?" Reno growled in an affronted tone. He wouldn't have bothered defending himself if the kid hadn't been so misguided in his assumptions.

"Don't you dare act all innocent, you crook! You evicted him out of his first home; you burnt down his second one; you robbed him blind… And now, you're using me as a pawn in your diabolical scheme to force him to leave!" The boy sniffled once and, for a second, looked as if he was about to cry. However, all traces of vulnerability vanished as the boy's hardened gaze fell on him once more. "I hate you!"

"Look, you've got it all wrong!" Reno couldn't figure out how such a misunderstanding could come about. Wasn't it painfully obvious that all that he had done were thoughtful, sincere attempts to make the blond more receptive to the idea of cohabitation (1)? Seriously, why is everyone always jumping to the worst conclusions about him?

"I'm wrong?! About what? The part where you hate him or the part where you're trying to banish him from Kalm?"

"Both!" Reno snapped, his temper flaring. In the height of his frustration, his mouth started to run off with him while blatantly ignoring any attempts at censorship by his brain. "I don't hate Cloud! I couldn't, even if I wanted to! Hell, things would've been so much easier if I could just hate that emo bastard! And I never wanted him to leave! Ever! If he dares to leave, I'll personally chase him to the ends of the earth and drag him back kicking and screaming all the way!"

The silence that descended after the last echoes of the Turk's yells died down could only be described as 'bloody awkward'. Despite the fact that Reno was so thick-skinned that he was practically covered in calluses, his cheeks still couldn't help taking on a colour that matched his hair.

"Okay… that was really weird…" Denzel murmured with a gob-smacked expression on his face. "Are you trying to tell me that you… um… actually like Cloud?"

Reno was still too mortified to speak. Stupid brain! Wasn't it supposed to prevent embarrassing situations like this from happening in the first place?

The annoying kid still didn't know when to stop with his questions. "You… uh… like him? As in a 'let's be friends' kind of way?"

"No, I like him in a 'let's fornicate like rabbits' kind of way!" It was meant to shut the kid up, but from the way the kid started to turn pasty and even slightly green around the edges, Reno realized that he hadn't sounded as sarcastic as he thought. Maybe it's because there is some truth in that admission… Argh! Now's not the time to think about Freudian slips! "I'm kidding! Just kidding, alright?! Stop looking as if you're about to throw up on me!"

Unfortunately, Reno's belated denials failed to reach the boy's ears. He was too busy condemning the Turk. "Y-you sicko! Stay away from Cloud, you hear me! I'm making it my mission in life to keep Cloud away from your perverted clutches!"

Reno had had enough. He dragged the protesting boy across the floor like a sack of potatoes, dumped him in one of the sentry boxes near the Mako reactors and shut the door behind him to muffle the noise.

It was just as well that he did so. The last thing he needed during his meeting with Cloud later on was a distracting, screaming brat with the lung capacity of an opera singer.

xXxXx

"Sir, you've got to stop him before things get out of hand!" pleaded Rude on the phone. The tall Turk normally wouldn't go behind Reno's back to appeal to their boss for help, but the situation was desperate enough to call for measures just as desperate. He would do whatever he could to keep his insane partner alive, even if it meant squealing on said partner to the most dangerous man on the planet. "What he's doing now has the word 'disaster' written all over it! You're the only person whom he might possibly listen to right now."

"I'm flattered that you hold such confidence in my skills of persuasion," stated Rufus, his voice flavoured with honeyed venom. "But Reno has made his bed. Now he has to sleep in it."

"You're not even going to do anything?" Rude exclaimed. Noticing that his tone sounded perilously close to disrespectful, he quickly added, "Sir?"

"Oh, but I am doing something about it," Rufus reassured him.

"So you'll talk to him, sir? That's great!" Rude heaved a sigh of relief. "I'll just head inside the power plant now and…"

"I'm leaving the task of stopping him in your capable hands." Rude could hear the smirk in Rufus's voice.

"…What?"

"And I'm holding you personally responsible for any catastrophic outcomes that directly, or indirectly, result from his actions. Don't fail me, Rude." The line went dead.

Rude was so dazed by the turn of events that he held the cell phone to his ear for a good two minutes before he regained enough presence of mind to hang up on his end.

He really, really wanted to kick himself at that moment.

Or bash his head against the wall. Repeatedly.

However, before he could give in to his self-harm urges, he caught sight of the figures walking down the path leading to the entrance of the power plant. He ducked behind a rusted oil barrel just in time to escape detection.

Reno was in deeper shit than he thought.

Rude originally wanted to help Reno, but what he saw made him change his mind. 'I'm afraid you're on your own this time, partner.'

After all, one of them had to be conscious enough to call the ambulance at the end.

xXxXx

"Denzel? Are you in there?" came a familiar voice through the wooden door.

"C-Cloud?" Denzel croaked (the result of too much yelling beforehand). "Cloud!" he called out again as the hope of rescue filled him.

"I'm going to kick the door open, so back away from the door as far as you can, okay?"

It took two tries for Cloud to splinter the wood around the locking device and force the door open. The blond immediately approached him and started on the task of untying him. While Cloud was busy loosening the knots, Denzel whispered, shamefaced, "I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble, Cloud. I never thought things would turn out this way."

"Denzel, you went and threatened a Turk. What did you think was going to happen?" There was mild exasperation, as well as some degree of amusement, in Cloud's reprimand.

"I dunno… I thought that jerk would just heed my warning and learn not to bother you ever again."

"I don't need you to fight my battles for me, Denzel." Cloud softened the blow of his words with a small smile. "Next time, just let me handle that jerk on my own."

But…! Denzel wasn't sure whether he should let Cloud know just how depraved the Turk truly was. "Did you see him on your way here?"

Cloud shook his head. "No, I've left that honour to Tifa."

Denzel pouted. So, you wouldn't let me fight your battles but you would let a woman do it for you. Denzel knew that he was being irrational; but damn it, he was a kid. He was allowed to be irrational.

Cloud correctly guessed what he was thinking. "I'm letting Tifa get involved because I wasn't allowed to inflict any form of injury on his person. It was one of the conditions stated in your ransom note." Cloud's smile turned slightly vicious. "He forgot to mention that I wasn't allowed to bring someone else along with me."

As they walked out of the sentry box, Denzel noticed a faint, smacking sound in the background, like that of flesh hitting flesh. "Um, Cloud, what is that noise?"

"That's the sound of Tifa's fist getting closely acquainted with Reno's face," observed Cloud in a disinterested tone. Then the air was filled with a tortured sound similar to that of a cat getting shampooed— a shrill howl of torment and outrage. Of shame and defeat. Cloud winced in what could almost be sympathy if he didn't believe that Reno thoroughly deserved what he was getting.

"Okay... Tifa must've aimed somewhere much lower to cause that one."

Denzel winced with him. "Remind me to never ever get on Tifa's bad side."

"Ditto."

(To be continued)

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(1) Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it is now official that Reno is psychotic; in that he suffers from delusions. This is one of them.

A/N: Heh, I hope I haven't totally butchered Tifa's character in this chapter. And, no, I don't make it a habit to write about child abuse in my fics (shifty eyes). Let me know what you think of the story so far. Reviews are much appreciated. Till next time then.