Dusk and Summer
Disclaimer: I don't own Law and Order: SVU, though I really wish I did…And I don't own Dashboard Confessional, I just love their music.
Summary: Post 'Loss', reflections on pre 'Loss'. If you don't like femslash, don't read it.
Ch. 5 – Reason To Believe
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"Oh, sweet lungs don't fail me now…Your burning has turned into fear…That trails me in my every step, I'm moving quick but you're always on my heels…"
Alex was restless the rest of the day; her thoughts remained solely on Olivia's chaste kiss. It was burned into her memory, her lips.
Sitting at her desk, she gazed off into space, reliving the moment between herself and the detective. It would not stop.
She had to get out; she left work early, and headed straight for the precinct. She strode confidently in, her heart trailing behind.
"…Just one more breath, I beg you please…Just one more step, my knees are weak…My heart is sturdy but it needs you to survive…My heart is sturdy but it needs you…"
As Alex drew closer to her target she felt her breathing come out faster, her knees were giving out beneath her, her heart was pounding in her head.
"Hey Alex, what's up?" Elliot asked, hearing the blonde's heels clinking across the tiled floor approach. He only looked up when she didn't answer. "Alex?"
She was hovering over his partner's desk, her cerulean eyes glaring a hole into the back of Olivia's head, "Olivia, I need to speak with you."
The brunette turned, gave a polite smile and said, "I'm a little busy right now Alex, maybe later?"
"No." Alex managed to breathe out huskily, "We need to talk, now."
"…Breathe, don't you want to breathe? I know that you are strong enough to handle what I need…My capillaries scream, there's nothing left to feed on…My body needs a reason to cross that line…Will you carry me there one more time?"
This time Alex leads Olivia toward the crib, shutting the door silently behind her as Olivia turns and demands, "What do you want, Alex?"
Alex, with her hands still on the door, took a deep breath and spun on her heel, turning to face the angered detective. Her hand still behind her on the doorknob, she gave Olivia a once-over.
"Alex?" Olivia asked again.
Alex took another deep breath, praying she could cross this line this time.
"…Steady lungs, don't fail me now…I feel you bursting, but you won't let me die…Fill me up with every step…I'm feeling sick, but I'm leaving it behind…"
The blonde took one step towards Olivia and paused, reaching out to place a hand on the brunette's waist. She pulled her closer, hoping to get her point across without saying a word.
"Alex? Are you ok? You don't look so good…" Olivia muttered, taking in the paleness of the blonde's skin in the dim light.
"I feel just fine."
"…Just one long breath I beg you please…Just one more step you are not weak…My legs are sturdy but they need you to survive…My heart is sturdy but I need you…"
Alex pulled again, this time pressing herself against Olivia, and whispered, "I'm really sorry about the earlier…I never meant for that to happen…"
"Meant for what to happen?" Olivia growled, "That cheap kiss? Yeah, sorry…"
"No, you walking out before I could kiss you back." Alex whispered gutturally, making Olivia lose her breath at the look on the blonde's face.
"…Breathe, don't you want to breathe? And know that you are strong enough to handle what I need…My capillaries scream, there's nothing left to feed on…My body needs a reason to cross that line…Will you carry me there once more?"
"Alex, no, please…" Olivia muttered, turning away, "This isn't funny anymore. I waited three years for you to come back so because I hoped we could continue…"
"The talk we had that night." Alex finished, nodding. "I know Liv, I know."
At the use of her nickname, Olivia felt a shiver race down her spine; she didn't know how to react. All she could remember to do was breathe.
Alex, seeing the brunette pause and take deep, slow breaths, seized her opportunity and leaned in…
"…I have reason to believe that I have victories to taste…I can feel them on my teeth, upon my lips and in my chest…I can roll them on my tongue; they are more supple than defeat…I feel the tension in my lungs and every move is fueled by my resolve to…"
Their lips met slowly but surely this time, Alex instigating her tongue to brush against Olivia's lips. Olivia whimpered and let her in.
Alex could feel her breath releasing; Olivia on her lips, teeth and against her chest compelled her forward, urging her to taste…
"…Breathe, don't you want to breathe? I know that you are strong enough to handle what I need…My capillaries scream, there's nothing left to feed on…My body needs a reason to cross that line…Will you carry me there one more time?"
"Wow." They both whispered at the same time when they pulled away.
"That was…" Olivia moaned, resting her forehead against Alex's.
"Incredible." Alex whispered breathlessly. "Yeah, I know."
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Alrighty, chappie number five, good for me! Ha-ha. The next one will be up soon I think.