"Tell me about Mimi." Brenda asked laying in hers and Roger's bed on her stomach looking up at him.
"What do you wanna know?" he asked looking down at her.
"Everything. How you met? What happened? That sort of stuff." she smiled looking up at him resting her chin on her hands.
"Well, Mimi came dancing in here one night trying to rescue me, you know? I mean, she really tried to get me out of here. But after you left, April, my diagnosis, withdrawal... I didn't want to face the world. I wanted to just live out my life. What ever was left of it anyway. I mean, April gave me the heroin telling me that it would help me forget. Forget you, us losing Roger, everything. It's what I needed at the time, you know? I mean, you were gone a year and a half and I wasn't living. I was just surviving. And then when I was diagnosed and going through withdrawal, all I could think about was you and Roger. Losing him and then you. I had to finally deal with it. It tore me up but Collins helped me a lot. She brought me back to life. But when Collins lost Angel, I couldn't take it. I ran away to Santa Fe. I couldn't stay here anymore. There had already been so much loss here. I had to get away. Mimi looked so sick when I left. But she needed me. I had to come back. I felt like I let enough people down here, I couldn't let her down too. I came back but she had run away too. We looked everywhere for her. I didn't want to make the same mistake with her that I made with you. Finally Maureen and Joanne found her in the park. She almost died on Christmas Eve. I sung her the song I wrote for her and she seemed fine. A couple of weeks later, she died. The whole time I was taking care of her, I told her about you and Roger, about everything we went through after we lost him. I didn't tell many people about you two, but she wanted to know everything about me. When I told her, she made me swear I would go find you after she died. She kept telling me that I had to do whatever I had to do to get you back. That was 6 months ago. I guess you calling me was her way of doing it for me." he said looking down at her with tears in his eyes.
"I would have liked Mimi, wouldn't I have?" she asked looking up at him wiping the tears from her eyes.
"Oh yeah. She definitely liked you. She loved hearing me talk about you. She said when I did, I got this light in my eyes that she had never seen before. But Angel, now she loved you like crazy." he laughed running his fingers through her short hair.
"Oh yeah, why's that?" she asked smiling up at him.
"Because Collins did. Did you know he kept pictures of you in their apartment? He still has them." he smiled looking down at her.
"What did Mimi say about that? Collins having pictures of your wife in his apartment." she asked looking up at him.
"Mimi didn't know who you were until she got sick. Collins just told her that you were an old friend and left it at that. He didn't put up any pictures of you and me. Just you." he said looking down at him.
"How come you didn't tell Mimi about me before? You know, before she was sick?" she asked sitting up in the bed.
"I didn't tell many people about you. I wanted to keep you to myself, you know? I mean, Mark knew about you because Collins told him one day when he saw the pictures of us around the loft and Benny knew because I was drunk one night and started talking about you. Maureen and Joanne didn't know anything until I called them needing a ticket to Florida. Not even when Maureen was dating Mark." he said looking up at her.
"Mark and Maureen dated? I thought she was..." she asked smiling down at him.
"A fact she discovered when they were dating." he smiled looking up at her.
"Oh no, that must have been really hard on poor Mark." she said looking over at him.
"Yeah, but he's trying to get over her. He just hasn't found the right girl. Not like me." she smiled reaching up to caress her face.
"Roger, you have no idea how sorry I am for running away." she said looking down at him as her smile faded.
"Bren, it's OK. You're home now and we have the most beautiful little girl in the world. If that's what we had to go through to have what we have now, it's worth it." he told her leaning up to kiss her.
"I don't know how you can say that, but I'm glad me and Rosie are finally home." she smiled sliding down in the bed.
"Because you're the love of my life Bren." he whispered leaning down to kiss her before they made love.
"Morning Roger. Where's Brenda and Rosie?" Mark asked coming out of his room as Roger began putting his old pictures of him and Brenda back up in the living room as well as pictures Brenda had of Rose.
"They're still sleeping. Can you hand me that picture, please?" he asked standing at the wall.
"Sure. So is it weird to have your wife back here?" he asked looking up at him as he handed him the picture of him and Brenda from the summer they met.
"A little, but she home with me where she belongs and I have Rosie too." he smiled staring at the picture to make sure it was straight.
"Why did she leave in the first place?" Mark asked sitting on the couch as Roger turned around.
"It's a long story, but the cliff notes version is that something happened to her before she left that she thought I would be really mad about and she made a mistake. We both did." he said looking down at him.
"That's it? That's all you're gonna tell me?" he asked looking up at him.
"Mark, it's complicated and none of it matters now. I have my wife back and we have a beautiful little girl. What more do you need to know?" he asked looking down at him.
"I don't know, it's just weird, you know? I mean, she leaves out of here one day with nothing but a note about her needing to clear her head and then 5 years later she calls you out of the blue and tells you that you have a daughter and that you need to go to Florida to talk." he said looking over at him.
"Mark, she's my wife, OK? I know everything I need to know. She told me why she left and why she didn't call me for 5 years. All that matters to me is that I have her back and we have a little girl. Our daughter. My daughter. After everything I've been through, I thought you'd be happy for me. I have a family." he said looking down at him.
"I am happy Roger. I just wonder why she didn't tell you that she was pregnant and just left the way she did. How are you so sure she's not gonna do it again? Leave you and take Rosie with her." he asked as Roger walked to the kitchen.
"I just know Mark. We were made for each other. You don't understand. I mean, when we met I had just graduated high school and I was really excited about going to Berklee. It's all I thought about since I picked up a guitar when I was 12. And then I met her and... I don't know. I found what I truly wanted to do with my life. I wanted to love her and make her happy. It was love a first sight. We spent every waking moment together that summer and then when I went away to Berklee, I came home as much as I could, but it wasn't enough. I needed to be with her for the rest of my life. On the night before her 18th birthday, I took all the money I had saved up and drove here. I rented this place and then I drove out to Long Island, I climbed into her bedroom window and asked her to marry me. That night. I couldn't live without her. She said yes and we left. And it was good. I mean, really good. Until Roger died and then everything got all screwed up so fast. I was working a lot and she was drinking a lot trying to deal with losing him and we messed up. She started performing again. We started smoking pot and one night when I went to go cop and I got into something. I forgot she was meeting me in a bar. Someone drugged and raped her. She found out she was pregnant a few weeks after that. She was afraid the baby would be his, so she left to have the baby and was gonna put her up for adoption. But then she was born and she looked just like Roger did when he was born, so it was obvious that Rosie was mine. By that time, she was gone 6 months and didn't know how to tell me that she knew she was pregnant when she left but didn't tell me. She's been running away ever since. When she called me Mark, everything I felt over the last 5 years melted away. My wife finally called and I was getting her back. And then I found out I had a little girl. A sweet, amazing little girl and things were finally the way they should have been 5 years ago. I love her Mark. I've always loved her. No matter what happened over the last 5 years, that never changed. April knew about her and so did Mimi. April tried to get me to forget her and Mimi made me swear to find her and make things right with her. Mark, she's all I've ever wanted." he told him sitting on one of the stools by the metal counter.
"How come I had to hear about her from Collins?" he asked looking up at him.
"It hurt too much. I loved her more than anything in the world and I thought I did something to make her leave. I couldn't talk about her." he said looking over at him.
"I just don't want to see you get hurt again Roger. I mean, there's a lot at stake this time. Not only your marriage, but your daughter. You've been through enough without having to worry about losing them again. That's all I'm saying." he said getting up to go to him.
"Mark, she's not gonna leave me again. The only thing I'm worried about now is them losing me." he said looking down at the counter.
"You're healthy Roger. You have no reason to think about that for a while. Just enjoy whatever time you have left with your family." he said looking down at him.
"Yeah well, Angel and Mimi were healthy and we lost them just like that. Both of them in the same year." he told him getting up and making coffee.
"Roger, you're not Angel and Mimi. You have them looking out for you. Do you really believe Mimi would bring Brenda and Rosie back into your life just to be taken away from them?" he asked looking over at him.
"I guess not. But I'm gonna be the best husband and father for them. They're my life Mark. I can't let them down." he said looking back at him.
"You're not gonna let them down Roger. All they want is for you to love them and you're gonna be the best husband and father you can be for them." he said looking over at him.
"I just hope it's enough." he said looking down. As Roger and Mark talked, Brenda listened from the bedroom with tears streaming down her face. The thought of losing him broke her heart. But living without him was worse. The whole 5 years, all she did was work and raise Rose. She went back to the bed and cried into her pillow so Roger wouldn't hear her.
"Hey Babygirl, where is everyone?" Collins asked entering the loft.
"Roger took Rosie to the zoo and Mark said something about a deal with the devil." she smiled standing over the stove cooking.
"Ahhh, that means he's seeing Benny. So whatcha making?" he asked looking over at her.
"Homemade macaroni salad. I wanted to barbeque on the roof tonight. I figured it would be fun." she smiled looking up at him.
"Babygirl, it's October." he laughed looking down at her.
"I know, but it's still nice out." she smiled stirring the elbow macaroni in the pot of boiling water.
"So, how are you doing?" he asked looking up at her.
"What do you mean?" she asked continuing to stir the macaroni.
"How does it feel to be back here?" he asked sitting on the stool at the metal counter.
"Like I never left. I don't know, I mean I envisioned how it would be to be back here and nothing I imagined could have compared to this." she smiled looking down at him.
"What do you mean?" he asked looking up at her confused.
"Well, in my visions it was always just you, me, Rosie and Roger. Having Mark, Maureen, Joanne, Mimi and Angel gives my little girl more people to love and to love her." she smiled looking down at him.
"Mimi and Angel?" he asked looking up at her with tears in his eyes.
"Yeah. They may not be with us anymore, but they're still a part of this family. I mean, Angel made you happy and gave you the love you deserve and Mimi helped bring me back to Roger. They may be gone, but they're not forgotten." she smiled taking his hand.
"You know Babygirl, Angel loved you so much. You not only took care of me and Roger, but you brought that beautiful little angel to us. Yours and Roger's little angel." he smiled getting up to wrap his arms around her.
"Yeah, well I love her too. She made my big brother happy." she smiled looking up at him.
"She did, you know? She made me happier than I ever thought I could be." he smiled kissing her head.
"Good. That's all I ever wanted for you, you know?" she smiled looking up at him.
"And all I ever wanted for you is to be back home with me and Roger. We were so worried about you when you were gone." he said sitting back down on the stool.
"I'm sorry Collins. I just needed to do stuff that I couldn't do here. And by the time I looked up, I felt like it was too late." she said looking over at him.
"Tell me what happened Babygirl. And don't give me the watered down version everyone else knows. I wanna hear all the gory details." he said looking over at her as she looked down at the floor.
"I can't Collins. It's too hard." she told him getting up from the stool to drain the macaroni.
"Babygirl, it's me. You know you can tell me anything. I'm not gonna judge you. I love you." he said looking over at her.
"I love you too, but a lot's happened that was really complicated." she said standing over the sink not facing him.
"I'm a smart man Bren. Try me." he said looking up at her.
"James drugged and raped me." she said turning towards him with tears in her eyes.
"Oh my God, Brenda why didn't you tell me?" he said getting up to go to her.
"I couldn't. I cheated on Roger and the last thing I wanted was for anyone to know. I loved Roger so much. The thought of betraying him like that... I just couldn't say it out loud." she cried looking up at him.
"It wasn't your fault Babygirl. You would never do anything like that on purpose." he told her taking her into his arms.
"3 weeks later, I found out I was pregnant. I didn't know how to tell Roger. I was afraid the baby wasn't his and he would hate me. I couldn't take him finding out what happened like that. I was afraid if I told him, he would try to kill James. But I waited too long trying to figure out what I was gonna do and I was afraid he wouldn't believe me. And then I started to show, so I decided that it would be easier if I got away for a little while. I'd give birth to the baby and if it wasn't Roger's I'd put her up for adoption and come back like nothing happened. I didn't think about what I would do if she was his. But then she was born and she looked just like Roger. Both of them. I didn't know how to come back. I mean, 6 months had gone by and telling him that he was a father was too hard. I would have to explain to him why I left knowing I was pregnant and didn't tell him. I didn't know what to do, so I stayed away. I concentrated on raising Rosie and supporting her. The older she got, the more she was like him. She looked like him, acted like him. She was asking about him more and more and I started thinking that the longer I kept them apart, the more damage I was doing to my daughter and to Roger. So one day, I broke down and called here on the off chance that he would still be here. I didn't expect him to be, but he was." she said looking up at him with tears falling from her eyes.
"Babygirl, you didn't have to do this alone. Me and Roger love you so much. There's nothing we wouldn't do for you. You know that." he told her kissing her head as he continued to hold her tight.
"I know. I was stupid. I made a lot of mistakes, but I'm home now. With you and Roger where I belong. Where our little girl belongs." she smiled looking up at him.
"Yeah you are Babygirl." he smiled looking down at her. "And we're gonna take care of you and Rosie like we should have been doing all these years." he said kissing her head again.