SawyersNumberOneFan: it's up for interpretation, so it may never be revealed… or will it ;)
By the way, this chapter has quite a few sweary words innit, cause they felt the need to show up, just warning you the now :)
So… this is the penultimate chapter, I'd love you to review so that I can post the last one quicker ;) have fun and review please :) x
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Kate had managed to keep herself from crying out so far, the fact that her emotions were on overdrive made the task difficult, but she still managed. She had tried to talk to Sawyer, not face to face but through texts… each one she sent was dismissed and she never got any reply. Every time either Shannon or Juliet asked her what was wrong, she smiled weakly and said she was okay, she knew they weren't that dumb, so she was preparing to face them and spill her heart out, but truth be told, she really wanted to tell someone so that it wouldn't all bottle up inside her. Kate sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, she really wanted to see Sawyer and straighten things out with him, he had assumed the worst. But why? Does he really think I'd do that? Kate looked down to her desk, the tears were resurfacing but before they could fall she sniffled them back and the bell had went, letting everyone know it was lunchtime.
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He stormed down the hall and out to behind the school building. He threw a punch at the wall; he was hurt, he felt betrayed and most of all he was fucking raging. He groaned as his knuckles were raw and sore, but he wanted physical pain to take over his emotional pain. He was never good at displaying feelings; this was his first decent relationship. Before Kate came into his life he only dated girls a couple of times, got in between their legs and looked for someone else. Other than that the extent of his previous relationships lasted no more than two weeks… thirteen weeks, after thirteen faithful weeks, she goes and fucks it up he growled under his breath. He was seething with rage, throughout this relationship he had been utterly faithful, not even looking at another girl. The bell rang, he wasn't exactly in the mood for being in school but he knew that if he left he would do something he would regret.
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Jealousy was something he couldn't control and when he mixed that with hurt and anger, the outcome was always Revenge or Getting even. No matter what the situation was, this combination always surfaced and generally it always fucked things up. Sawyer still hadn't calmed down, he may have looked okay but inside he was like an active volcano… ready to explode at any minute. He felt slightly numb, he was never used to being the one that was betrayed… he was always the betrayer but he thought that with Kate, it would be different. He always thought she was the loyal type, too afraid to cheat and always faithful… that's why he liked her, he thought he could trust her with his heart… but apparently he was wrong. She's only a girl, so re-grow yer balls and get over it his mind screamed. Sawyer knew that he would do anything at this point, bad or good… but the bad side outweighed the good side, which was worrying.
The bell went for lunch time and he sighed, he got out from his seat and wandered slowly out of the class, he wished that he had alcohol near him; he really needed a long, long drink. He smiled- that's a plan! He thought, tonight he would take his fake id and get drunk, so drunk that he would forget all about this betrayal. The sweet taste of Alcohol would comfort him and make him feel better; he got up to his locker and put some things in it, he slammed the door and sighed. His jaw clenched, all he could think about was how Kate had ruined everything, he felt so stupid, feeling this way over a girl. Other guys would laugh at him and make his life hell if they knew this was why he was moping around and his belligerent attitude… but he couldn't help it, he truly felt something for her… yes, the L word Sawyer groaned you love her James his mind was really pissing him off, playing both sides and annoying him even further.
As he was walking up the hall, he felt a pair of hands grabbing onto his arm, he was ready to yell there face off when he saw a sultry looking Colleen smirk at him. "What?" he said gruffly, Colleen smirked and pressed herself against him "Sawyer… why the bad mood?" she asked sweetly. He rolled his eyes and said "None of yer business Cole" She smirked and whispered to him "Bet I can make you feel better" she pressed her lips to his and pulled him into the girls toilets, he never put up any fight, he was hurt and wanted some form of comfort. Sawyer dropped his bag on the floor and lifted her up and sat her on the sink, he stared at her in hate. His revenge mode came out in full force and he wanted to punish Kate and punish every girl that would have the chance to rip his heart into tiny shreds.
Colleen didn't care about the way he was looking at her, she wasn't bothered… all she cared about was the fact she was getting her claws into Sawyer. She pulled his head forward and crushed her lips onto his, pushing her tongue inside his mouth. Sawyers tongue battled hers, his hands that were on either side of her began moving, one of the held onto the back of her head and the other slid up her thigh and under her mini skirt. Colleen smirked against his mouth, this was just what she needed to cheer her up today and by the looks of it, cheer him up too. His hand rested on the top of her thigh, roughly caressing her skin, he felt her open her legs further and then felt them snake their way around his waist, pulling him closer. He tried to stop what he was doing, even with his anger, he felt slightly guilty but the two faced voice in his head made him stop for a moment asking one question: is here fine? Colleen smirked and whispered back "no one uses here at lunchtime"
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Kate felt dirty, she just felt like she hadn't washed off the makeup properly, she ran a hand over her cheek and grimaced, so she headed off towards the toilets to give her face a refreshing splash of water. She really wanted to see Sawyer, she hadn't seen him all day, all she wanted to do was get his full attention and tell him what really happened… not what he thought happened. It would be a tough conversation but she still wanted to go through with it, she thought their relationship deserved it, that they deserved it. She avoided looking at anyone on her journey to the toilets incase they wanted a long conversation with her… the only person she wanted a conversation with was Sawyer. Kate wrapped her arms around her body and kept her head hung low, she didn't want to rush to her destination, so she took her time and as she reached the door, she stopped before entering… she could have sworn that she heard a moan.
She pushed open the door and stopped in her tracks. At the far wall in the toilets was Sawyer, his jeans around his ankles and Colleen on her knees, her hand and mouth on him. Kate felt her heart drop into her stomach. She couldn't believe it, was he really standing there with colleen pleasuring him? Kate closed her eyes and reopened them, she was going to cry, the tears had found their way to the surface of her eyes. His eyes were closed, obviously enjoying what Colleen was doing. Colleen turned her head slightly, sensing that there was someone else there, upon seeing that it was Kate, she grinned. Kate saw the grin Colleen had flashed her and the look she had given her, Colleen was obviously enjoying the fact that she was ruining Kate's relationship. She saw Colleen's hand move faster on him and her head got closer to his body. Kate froze, she didn't know what to do, and she felt betrayed, what she done was a tiny fraction compared to what he was doing, right in front of her.
She heard Sawyer's throaty groan- he had found his release. His eyes slowly opened, a lazy smile on his face but it quickly fell as he saw Kate standing at the other end of the toilets, with fresh tears in her eyes and a look that broke his heart. The guilt he felt was trumped by his need for revenge, quickly loosing his guilty face; he replaced it with a cold hard glare. He knew how hurt she was, the evidence was etched into her face but he couldn't help but hope she was hurting as much as he was… he let the corners of his mouth twitch into a slight smile. The lights from the toilets highlighted her tears, showing them to Sawyer as they ran down her face, a sob escaped her lips and she spun around… running out the door, little did he know, he was causing her tremendous hurt and pain, which was a thousand times more than what he was feeling. He pulled up his boxers and jeans and told Colleen that he wasn't doing anything more, his guilt resurfaced, so he left and headed towards the cafeteria.
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She couldn't see anything in front of her… the tears were so thick; they covered her eyes like frosted glass. Roughly running her sleeve over her eyes, she stopped another sob just before it came to the surface, she was running as fast as she could but she tripped up and landed on her hands and knees. If she wasn't humiliated enough, this had to happen. She felt so ashamed; she was acting like a baby, crying her heart out and then falling on the floor. She expected to hear laughing and ridicule but all she heard was a worried "Kate?" She didn't even want to look up incase it was someone ready to pounce and make fun of her. She felt someone's hands go around her waist and pick her up… she saw the worried face of Jack.
"Kate… what's wrong?" he asked worried by the way she was acting. Kate's tears ran faster than ever and she sobbed, pushing her face into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and he took her out of the main building away from prying eyes and he found them a bench to sit on, in a secluded area of the schools garden. "Kate, you have to tell me what's wrong" he asked again, Kate continued to sob into his t-shirt and she clenched onto the material, hoping she could bury her face and never let it resurface. Realising that he wouldn't get an answer out of her, he wrapped his arms around her, rubbing soothing circles in her back. After a few moments, he text Juliet letting her know where they were. He felt Kate quieten down, so he leaned his head down and said "Kate, please talk to me" Kate sniffled and let out a deep breath.
"Everything's just gone so wrong" she offered up quietly. Jack scrunched his eyebrows together and replied "What's the matter?" Kate smiled weakly at him and said "Sawyer took something I said the wrong way and overreacted…" Jack glared in front of him "what did he think you say?" Kate laughed weakly "Jack, I don't know if we should be talking about this" Jack smiled at replied politely "Even if I'm a guy… I can still listen… and maybe help you with it" Kate smiled greatly at him "thanks Jack…" he shook his head and smiled "No problem" he waited for her to continue as he didn't want to push her. Kate sighed and noticed that Juliet and Shannon were walking towards them quickly, looking worried. "Kate, are you okay? What's wrong?!" they both said simultaneously. Kate sighed again and began her story "when I was in Iowa, Kevin came on to me, he tried to take it further than a kiss… and I told him no, I didn't even mean for the kiss to happen in the first place…"
Juliet grew even more worried, she knew what her cousin was like, he may be sweet and endearing but screw him over and he unleashes hell upon everyone. She hoped that he hadn't flown off the handle yet. "…and I told James, but he never gave me time to finish what I was saying… and he assumed that we went all the way… and he stormed off" her tears were making an appearance again, they sat silently on her eyes, waiting for the right moment "I'm sure he'll come around Kate" Jack said nicely. Kate shook her head and one tear made its escape "I found him in the toilets with Colleen at the start of lunch…" she closed her eyes as the rest of the tears made their way down her face "… she was sucking him off… and all he done when he saw me was smile! He fucking smiled at me!" The three of them grew silent and tense.
"…how could he do that?" her voice broke and became quiet. Jack slid Kate off his knee and sat her on the bench; he stood up and nodded to the girls to comfort her. Kate started sobbing again and she leaned into the two girls as they sat down on each side of her. Jack's face contorted in anger; Kate sounded sincere when she said nothing happened, he could hear the sincerity in her voice, and how this was tearing her up. He knew he didn't have a right to interfere in their relationship but he always hated the concept of cheating, it had ruined some of his family life and he felt so much rage at Sawyer, revenge never sat well with him either, so he had to go straighten things out. He spun around and started to walk away in the direction of the cafeteria when he heard Kate calling his name.
"What are you going to do?" she croaked as loud as she could. Jack stopped and said back harshly "Just going to straighten things out Kate" he stormed off before she could shout again. Kate stood up and began to follow in Jack's direction when Shannon pulled on her hand "Kate, don't" Kate shook her head and wiped the remains of the tears away "I don't want him hurt" Juliet's mouth flew open and she stood up beside Kate "He hurt you! He deserves to be taught a lesson Kate!" Kate glared at her "He's your cousin! Why aren't you defending him?" Juliet gave her a cold hard stare and said back harshly "Why are you!" Kate went quiet and she looked to the ground "…because I love him" Juliet lightened up a bit and she leaned into Kate "I know you do… but he's hurt you badly…" Kate looked at the both of them with pleading eyes, so they both followed her to the cafeteria.
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The girls had barely made it to the cafeteria as they saw Jack and Sawyer square up to each other in one of the halls. The walked up quietly as both of the boys had tense profiles and were ready for a fight. They heard Sawyers hostile voice first "Why are you interferin, whatever happened is between me and Kate" Jack immediately fired back "It involves me, when she's crying her heart out at what you done!" Sawyer glared and noticed that Kate, Shannon and Juliet were standing a few feet away. He motioned to Kate and growled "Awe, if it isn't miss innocent herself… spreadin bullshit, making yerself look like the hurt one and make me the bad one huh?" Kate shot him a hurt look and replied "I didn't do what you think I done James!" Sawyer snorted and replied "sure ya didn't, you just want everyone ta have their attention on you."
Kate closed her eyes and opened them again, pleading with him to believe her "I didn't! I didn't want him to kiss me; I stopped because I love you!" Sawyer bitterly laughed "love me? Kate, for both our sakes, shut up. And stop lying" Kate walked forward and said "im not lying, I do love you! And NOTHING happened! Im telling the truth" Sawyer raised his hand, making her stop in her tracks. "I'm not in the mood for bullshit Kate… so just leave me alone" Kate's heart got crushed even more; she really wanted him to listen to her "James!" Sawyer's eyes burnt right through her "Don't call me James, sluts don't get ta use my real name" Kate's mouth flew open, did he really call me a slut? Anger began to rise in her but before she could react, Jack swung his arm towards Sawyer.
The two of them began to throw punches at each other, hopefully hitting somewhere that caused the most damage. Neither of them were in the mood for being civil, they fought… and fought hard. It was a rotation of who had their back on the ground, jack, sawyer, jack, sawyer… they rolled around and still kept the punches flying. A couple of teachers that had heard the commotion came running down the hall at full speed. They separated the boys, who made resistance hard, they tried to use there weight to pull out of there grip and fly for the other. Ragged breathing and whispers all around the hall was all that was heard. The most damage that was caused was superficial wounds, little cuts and bruises that were slowly appearing. Sawyer shot a glare at Kate and shook his head, he pulled out of the grip from the teacher and strode out of the building and headed for his car.
He was fuming, ready to erupt again. He got in his car and sped off, going straight home for his ID. Sawyer was hurting, not just physical pain but emotional pain… she hurt him and then turned it around so she was the innocent one- his mind played it like a mantra, but the looks she gave him broke his heart, they made him want to change his mind, that he just wanted to say sorry, that he WAS wrong and kiss her tears away. Sawyer gripped the steering wheel so tight his knuckles turned white, his hands were starting to hurt, but he didn't care. You knew this would happen James, wear your heart on your sleeve and for sure, it would be snatched and torn apart. He groaned, he just wanted that two faced voice in his head to shut up and leave him alone in blissful silence. He couldn't wait till he could get his hands on strong alcohol, the prospect of being able to silence and numb any thoughts and feelings was like ecstasy to him at this point in time, he just wanted to be left alone and to feel like he was the only one that mattered.
Kate ran her hands over her face and cried into them, Shannon put an arm around her and nodded for Juliet to come with her. Jack was let go and he pressed his thumb against his cut lip, he hissed slightly and followed the girls. They headed for Jack's car and sat inside away from the nosy gossipers of the school. Kate cried on Shannon's shoulder for a good twenty minutes solid, all her thoughts and emotions came flooding out at once. He had called her a slut and it stung… it stung just as much as him not caring about cheating on her for the sake of revenge. Kate sat back in the seat and she laid her hands on her face, then letting them rub slowly over, trying to remove the signs of her tears. Kate smiled weakly at them all, she was grateful for them being there, comforting her but all she wanted to do now, was be alone. Jack nodded at Juliet and he turned on the engine, they knew she wanted to be by herself, so taking her home was the best thing they could do for her at the moment.
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i dont know if the whole fight thing made sense, so aye one more chapter left x