xox-emily-xox: have fun on yer holiday :)!
So here it is. The last chapter :) by the way thanks to everyone who reviewed! I didn't think id write this much, so yeah :)
Have fun and review please! x
----------------------------------------------
To say that the past week had been hard was an understatement. The only friends that Sawyer trusted were the ones that weren't talking to him, the ones that gave him harsh looks as he passed… and there was his cousin, even she wasn't talking to him, and it hurt. He always counted on Juliet to be there for him and help him through tough times, as she had always done, but now she couldn't even look him in the eye. The only other person he needed to help him in rough times was Kate, even with half his brain telling him to forget her, that she was just like all the other manipulative girls. When he got drunk that night all he could feel was guilt, his brain was talking clearer than it had earlier, that he was stupid and that he should go apologise. Seeing her the rest of the week in school, that she could barely stand to be in his presence, hurt.
The anger that he had, slowly subsided and was replaced with sadness and guilt. Sawyer kept replaying the conversations in his head, trying to make sense of them; he was too pissed off at the time to compute them rationally. The answer he came up with, the same answer every time, was that she was telling the truth, that nothing serious happened and that she was entirely sincere. He felt like the biggest prick in the world, he had gone and ruined everything… he blamed her for it at the beginning, but he knew now that it was his fault. Sawyer groaned, he hated himself; he had really missed her, not being able to talk to her, not being able to see her smile and lastly not being able to kiss her good morning. The only thing he knew that he had to do, was to make it up to her, apologise for being a bastard and try to gain her trust again… he loved her still and he needed her to know that.
He stepped through the doors of the school, immediately looking around for her telltale brown curly hair and her bright and happy green eyes. He saw nothing, either someone's hair was too curly or too straight, not the right shade of brown or was too short or long. Sighing he decided to go to his locker and get rid of this heavy bag. He walked past Colleen and her friends; she giggled and smiled at him with the same sick smile that she had given him once he saw Kate in the toilets, it made him feel ill. Colleen had annoyed him the rest of the week for sex, he had turned her down, he didn't want her… he wanted Kate and he didn't want to inflict anymore pain and anguish. She had even put on a show every time Kate had walked past, she would intentionally come up to him and act like a crushing pre-teen or she would get close to him, taunting the hell out of Kate, he wanted to smack her… smack her hard and put sense into her for being a nasty bitch, but he would never hit a girl, no matter how much he despised them.
----------------------------------------------
Sawyer had spent the majority of his time looking out for Kate, he hadn't seen her yet. He even waited around some of the classes that she was meant to be in, still nothing. He was loosing his patience, all he wanted was for her to appear, it didn't matter where, so he could pull her into his arms and set things straight… get them back to the way things used to be, happy and always close, taking comfort in the others appearance. It was coming up on lunchtime, so he would try the cafeteria and ask the others where she was. He knew it would be hard to go up and ask them, as all they wanted to do was burn him at the stake, but he knew it was the right thing to do. Sawyer sighed and pushed open the large doors of the cafeteria, he immediately spotted his cousin and friends. Putting on his best cocky walk, he went over to them and smiled weakly.
They all stopped what they were doing; they glanced between each other and glared at the unwanted presence of Sawyer. They all gave him looks that would make most people nervous and quickly scuttle away, but he stood his ground… they were his friends after all and he really needed to know of they knew where Kate was. Juliet looked down at the table and said nastily "What do you want James?" Sawyer internally smiled because someone had actually acknowledged him enough to speak. Clearing his throat he spoke up "Was wonderin if any y'all knew where Kate is" "What so you can call her a slut again?" Jack snipped in viciously. Sawyer sighed; he closed his eyes and reopened them "I really need to talk to her Jack" Jack and Juliet glanced to each other as did Shannon and Sayid.
He looked confused at them, "What do you need to tell her?" Shannon said angrily. Sawyers jaw squared "Nothin concernin you sticks" Shannon stood up and slammed her hands on the table, leaning over, growling at him "It damn well does Sawyer" Taken back by her aggressive attitude, he raised his hands in surrender and sighed "I have ta straighten things out… I…" he looked away nervously. Shannon's features lightened up a fraction and she said with a hint of an edge "…Love her?" Sawyer scratched the back of his neck and smiled gingerly at them. Shannon sighed and stood upright again "Well… your too late Sawyer" He scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion "What's that supposed ta mean?" Shannon reached down and picked her handbag up; she walked in front of him and looked sadly at him.
"She left Sawyer… her dad got another job… and basically it was up to her if they would leave or not… so thanks" she pushed his chest hard, her eyes heavy with emotion. Sawyer felt his chest tighten, she's left? He looked to the rest of them for confirmation; they all had the same accusing look "and you're blamin me?" he growled. Shannon glared at him and sneered back "Well… she said she would have stayed cause of us… but just being near you made her skin crawl, you had to fuck everything up with that slut over there" she pointed dramatically at Colleen who was at the other end of the cafeteria, currently sitting on one of the football players lap. Sawyer sighed and rubbed his hands over his eyes, he wasn't expecting for her to have moved away, he felt crushed, he really wanted to make things up… but now, he couldn't do a thing.
He opened his eyes and glanced sadly at Shannon "where's she away ta?" Shannon looked away for a moment and replied "I'm not telling you… she deserves to have some happiness, I don't want you upsetting her again" Sawyers eyes grew sadder and he replied fully of emotion "Shan, please… I love her" he saw her icy façade slip away but she shook her head and said "I'm sorry Sawyer… you're too late" Sawyer let out a shaky sigh, he didn't know what to do, he really wanted to try and get a hold of her and tell her everything she wanted to hear, so she could come back and stay. He looked to Juliet, her expression was pained, she had never seen him look like that since his parents had died, he looked so emotional and it made her want to cry.
Shannon shifted slightly, she could see this was really affecting him and she really didn't want to do as she had been instructed by Kate. She shuffled around in her handbag and pulled out an envelope, handing it to Sawyer. He regarded the envelope wearily; he paused for a moment before opening the flap. He tipped the envelope upside down, letting its contents spill into his hand… his heart stopped briefly. In his hand was all the jewellery he had given her, looking at them was like being stabbed in the heart, she must really have hated him after his lapse in judgement, she hadn't even bothered to take them with her, as reminders of what once was. He didn't think he would feel this way; he was upset and was showing everyone around him how much he was.
As his eyes glazed over, he closed them quickly, not wanting to show his friends that he was ready to cry. He hadn't actually cried in years… ten years to be exact, since the day he found out that his parents and his real dad had died in a crash. Everyone one at the table, despite their new found dislike for him, felt sorry… not for seeing him cry but for how he felt and how he was probably tearing apart inside. Juliet stood up and walked over to him; she looked at him sadly and pulled him into a hug. She felt him relax slightly and sigh "James… she leaves today… you might be able to catch her" His head slowly came up from her shoulder, he smiled weakly and replied "Thanks Jules" She smiled and squeezed her arms around him before letting him go. He walked quickly, and then began to jog towards his car.
He really hoped that she would give him a chance; even just five seconds… it wouldn't matter, just as long as he told her how he felt. Never in his life had he felt more than one emotion as strong as this, he was a mixture of hope, sadness and apprehension. He was actually nervous about talking to her, something he hadn't felt around a girl since he was thirteen. He ran over in his mind what he was going to say, preplanning it so he wouldn't blank. His fingers tapped away at the steering wheel as he was coming up on her street… he didn't see her dad's car. He changed from optimistic to hurt, the car was gone, the house looked empty and the 'for sale' sigh had a red 'sold' sticker slapped across the front.
He sat for a moment just staring at the house, then it hit him- he could try phoning her. He laughed as the revelation struck him, why hadn't I thought of that before? He pulled out his phone and sifted through the names list till it got to hers; he quickly pressed the 'call' button and waited as the phone started to dial. It rang… and rang… and rang. He groaned and pressed the end call button. He tried again for another four times, still was the same result… the phone went onto the answering machine. He didn't want to leave a message; he'd probably sound stupid, so he went back to his phone and quickly wrote a text saying that she should text him or call him once she gets it, that he wanted to speak to her as it was important.
He waited for an hour on anything from her before giving up… it was useless, she was now far away and wouldn't even take his calls, he must have screwed up royally for her to act like this. Sawyer sighed and drove home, all he wanted to do was curl up and die, he had ruined probably the best thing that happened in his life, he never felt as much as a screw up as he did as he drove home. Sawyer lay on his bed and tried to fall asleep, being in dreamland sounded better than being in reality at the moment, he closed his eyes and sighed, he felt silly… he was only eighteen but he felt like he had lost the love of his life, he rolled on to his back. Do I really believe that? His mind yelled Of course you do. Eventually he fell asleep, hoping that he would wake up and it would all have been a bad dream.
----------------------------------------------
"Katie… I need to ask you something important" Sam said seriously. Kate looked up from the magazine she was reading and smiled at him "Sure". Sam sat down and glanced out the window "They've offered me a job… in New York… but I don't know if I'm going to take it" He paused for a moment, watching her reaction. She replaced the sad look with a false smile and he continued "It's up to you… I'm happy enough to stay here if that's what you want… I don't want to split you up from your friends… or James" Kate sighed and shut over the magazine "you have to be honest with me… is the job important?" she said politely. Sam nodded and said "Yeah, it's a good opportunity" Kate smiled weakly "Then let's go… I don't want you giving up something important just because of me daddy"
"That's why I'm ready to pass it by… I want you to be happy" he said clearly. Kate walked over and hugged him "Daddy, I want you to take it! You deserve to have the best job for being so good to me" Sam smiled down at Kate and hugged her back. "When do they want you to start?" she said quietly "Next Wednesday… so we'd have to leave on Monday so we can settle in, in the new house… I know it's a bit short notice…" he trailed off and stared at her. Kate new what he was saying- that she only had under a week to tell her friends, say goodbye and pack up her life for New York. She nodded and replied "That's okay… I'll go and tell everyone tomorrow night and then I'll start packing" Sam nodded and as Kate was walking away he called after her "Thanks Katie" Kate nodded and headed up the stairs.
Kate sat with her back against the wall in her room; it was now empty and felt cold. She was starting to have second thoughts about moving away, she would miss everyone… even Sawyer. What happened in the past week made her loose all her trust in men, the only one she could trust was her father… Sawyer shattered all her confidence and it slowly grew into something dark. Hate was too strong a word to use, she still loved him, but the things he done and said were hurtful. She spun the ring on her finger around and looked at it… that was the only piece of jewellery that she hadn't given to Shannon in the envelope; she wanted to keep it, though she didn't know why. She couldn't keep the things he had given her, it made her sad when she looked at them, they reminded her of happy times, which led to her thinking about happy times with Sawyer. She didn't want to hurt anymore.
"Katie, you got that last box up there?" Sam yelled from down the stairs. Kate snapped out of her trance and cleared her throat "Yeah Dad… I'll be down in a minute" She placed her hands on the floor, to give her leverage to stand up. Brushing away the creases in her top, she looked around for the box and picked it up. As she left the room, she stood in the doorway and took one last, long glance, smiling weakly, before closing over the door. Kate made her way down the stairs carefully and took in the view of her now empty house. She felt as if it hadn't been that long ago since she had moved in, but the memories that happened here felt as if they were from years ago, good and bad.
Kate picked up her large bag and swung it over her shoulder, picking up the box between both hands again, and she made her way to the trunk of the car and placed the box neatly inside. They had sent all the larger things up by van a few days ago so it would already be waiting for them when they arrived; Kate sat in the passenger seat and fastened her seatbelt. Kate's stomach rumbled, she hadn't eaten anything this morning as the smell of the bagels that was brought in didn't sit too well with her. She pulled out a cookie from her bag and munched away; Sam got in the car and buckled up. He smiled at Kate and said "Ready?" Kate nodded sadly and smiled "Yeah, let's go" The engine roared to life and they pulled out of the drive way and headed off towards New York.
----------------------------------------------
They had been driving for over two hours and were currently driving along the highway. Kate had her hand resting on the outside of the car, as she had rolled the window down to let cool air come into the warm and clammy interior. She was staring out at the passing landscapes and scenery until she felt a vibration against her thigh and the telltale music of her ring tone. Kate plucked the phone out from her jeans pocket and glanced at the screen. James. She held her breath for a moment, internally debating whither or not she should answer. She decided not too, why should I? She thought. She wasn't in the mood for an argument, infact she wasn't in the mood to speak to him altogether, he would probably make her feel bad and she'd get upset.
She let the phone ring out and cut to silence. Sam eyed her from his position in the drivers' seat, wondering why she didn't answer. She hadn't told him much lately about her social life, or why she chose to move hundreds of miles away from the person she loved. He didn't want to ask her, he respected her privacy and didn't want to cause a feud on the long drive in front of them. The phone went off again… and again… and again, Sam sighed "Aren't you going to answer that?" Kate's face went blank, she shook her head. "Katie, what happened between you and James?" Kate glanced at him "Nothing… why?" Sam faced her for a second then continued to watch the road "You're lying… know why? You's two are glued to the hip, you's spend every waking second together and for the past week I haven't heard or seen him… and you chose living far away over living close by…"
He paused for a moment and added "Did he hurt you?" he eyed her seriously. Kate smiled sadly and said "We hurt each other… and I can't… I just…" she sighed and rested the side of her head on her hand. Sam nodded and stayed quiet. Her phone went off again, only this time it was a text message. Kate looked at the message that Sawyer had sent Kate; please reply as soon as you get this, it's really important x she sighed. Kate rubbed her thumb over the side of the phone in thought. She was deciding whether or not to reply, by the look of the text he seemed sincere about wanting to talk to her he'll only call you something else her mind groaned. Kate pressed the delete button and put her phone back in her pocket. Maybe forgetting all about him was the best thing she could do, tears had found their way to the surface but she held them back and closed her eyes, hoping that she would get over him and concentrate on her new life.
----------------------------------------------
:) There's something dark and twisty in me that loves the prospect of things not working out between them, I just felt it was an appropriate ending… but! I do love happy endings as well, so basically it's up to you –points and smiles at you all- if you want a sequel. I have a general idea for one, so… let me know :) and thanks x