Fit the 6th (The Rather lame entry doesn't count as a Fit)
Pain. Unimagable Pain. It hit me all over, and as I lay there paralysed, I found it hard to breathe. The pain was in my chest, my throat, and most of all my head. It pounded and screamed at me, to let go, but I knew I couldn't. I tried to call for help, but I found myself incaple of doing so. My vision was blurred, and faded in and out of darkness. Through the haze there was red and white, no shapes or figures, just the colours. My eyes began to hurt, so I closed them to reduce the pain, it did not work though...
"Somebody change the channel. This sounds rather depressing," Arthur exclaimed. "If I wanted to hear someone complain about pain I'd ask Marvin about his diodes, but I don't and so I shan't."
It has been exactly one week, and 34 mins since Arthur, Ford, and Marvin landed in the infamous reality TV show, Big Brother. Nothing much has happened to them, and much never will, for they are forced inside a tiny house with nothing to do and nowhere to go.
"I wonder when we shall be let out, although I am not bored, for I have an exceptionally large mind with an almost infinite number of things to think about. I can see though that you are distressed. Think how it is to be me, with the pain in all the diodes down my left side..."
Marvin is one of the most popular beings on the show this series, which happens to say a lot about it's viewers.
Ford was in the corner, being silent, which, for Ford Prefect, is an unnatural occurence. Suddenly, he jumped up, span around in a circle, then sat back down again.
"What on earth was that?" Arthur cried.
"Oh. Nothing really."
"Fair enough" Arthur looked puzzled.
Then, to FURTHER Arthurs puzzlement, Ford did the exact same thing again.
Seeing Arthurs puzzlement, Ford sighed.
"Alright you semi-simian Monkey brain, Heres the deal. Viewers like a good oddball, they like someone who seems absolutely bonkers-ly mad. They like someone who they can say "ZOMG, CAN YOU BEEEEELIEEEEVE HE JUST DID THAT?!!!" You understand?"
"No. But then, with you, I never do."
"Basically, NutjobWinner."
"Ahhhh... I still don't get it." Suddenly, for no apparent reason, Marvin started to shake uncontrollably, with sparks emerging from every crevasse on his body. Then, he stopped, and resumed with what he was doing before. Figuring out EXACTLY how big the Universe is.
"Mmmph Mmmph shudja?" Arthur's voice was muffled, coming from his hiding place under the sofa.
"I know what you're trying to say, I can detect it in your speech pattern, and the answer to your question is, Because I was trying to think down to your level, but my mind cannot think down to that level. Shame that, as I am quite curious as to how your race is so stupid."
About 5 millionths of a second after Marvin says that, the three heroes from our story, will not be in the Big Brother house anymore, but before you are told what happens to them, there is another, more important story to be told.
What is this story that must be told?
Is Arthur REALLY that stupid?
What has become of Zaphod?
And why have I still not got round to telling you if this involves the Ultimate Question?
All (Might) be answered in the next exciting installment of "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Fanfics"