Summary: DBZ/FMA X-over. Sequel to my Alchemy and Saiyans fic. Chi-Chi decides to have Gohan learn alchemy, so she sends him to Amestris.
Disclaimer:
BritKit: Alright, this is about a month late, but what the heck. I had a New Year's/anime party, and, as per usual, things got... well...
it walks alone: Weird.
BK: Thankyou. So. Welcome to le PARTY!!
(IWA, BK, SKM, 'N', and IDNR are sitting in BK's basement, 'N' is in a rocking chair looking at the 'Battle of the Sexes' board game. SKM and IDNR are looking at SKM's comic encyclopedia. BK and IWA are spreading out movies/anime.)
'Nothing': "Men are more likely to go colorblind.' ...Suckers.
BritKit: So, what're we gonna watch first?
SailorKMoonie: Cinderella!
'N': Wha?
SKM: Because IWA's never seen it.
BK and InDesperateNeedofRitalin: WHAAAAT?!
'N': Wow.
it walks alone: So I live under a rock!
BK: But but but but... you're 17!!
InDesperateNeedofRitalin: It's Cinderella! You HAVE to see it!
BK: Okay, we're watching that first. (puts DVD in)
(screen hums)
IWA: D... V... D. ... And it's off-center.
(we watch Cinderella)
BK's mom: Girls! Dinner!
All: Foooood!!
(group troops upstairs for stir fry)
(all sit at table)
SKM: Well, you guys insisted—I brought the FMA movie.
BK and IWA: YAAAY!
IDNR: Have you seen it?
SKM: No, my dad said it wasn't that good.
BK: Why not?
SKM: 'Cause they both end up in Germany trying to get back to Amestris.
BK: Doesn't Al, like, not have his memories?
IWA: He has the memories from in his body, but not while he was in the armor.
BK: Oh. What about Ed?
SKM: He keeps having dreams about it, but he's not sure if they're real.
IWA: It's his subconscious trying to tell his conscious. (pause) Coming from the daughter of the psychology professor.
BK: Yeah... I can just see a mini Amestris-dressed Ed banging on a door labeled 'Conscious' yelling "There's something you need to know!" with a mini Germany-dressed Ed on the other side of the door with a pillow over his head ignoring him.
IWA: Mao.
SKM: Mao.
IWA: Mao.
SKM: Oranges. (takes an orange slice)
BK: You two are SO weird.
'N': Moving ON.
IDNR: (giggles)
BK: Hey, 'Nothing', why does your sweatshirt say 'Sensei' on it?
IDNR: What's 'sensei'?
IWA: Teacher.
IDNR: 'N', you're a teacher??
'N': Technically, no.
SKM: So, why...?
'N': I'm a black belt.
BK: Huh?
'N': 'Cause black belts are teachers to every-OW! (slams elbow on SKM's chair)
IWA: Nice.
'N': Ow. Ow, ow, ow...
(group finishes dinner)
(all head back into basement)
IWA: Hey, can we play Talisman now?
(BK: Just so ya know—Talisman is a board game—a magical quest game. We played it last year too.
IWA: And it's old. I looked, and I can't find it in stores. (growls))
(group plays)
IWA: (draws card) Tomb. A tomb will remain on this spot for the rest of the game. Dammit! Why do I always get the stuff that sticks around?
SKM: Yeah, tombs have a nasty habit of always being there.
BK: (rolls) (moves) (draws card) Hobgoblin. Strength 3.
'N': (rolls for hobgoblin) Strength 7!
BK: (rolls) 1. Damn.
SKM: (rolls) 4. 1, 2, 3, 4. Fields. 1, 2, 3, 4. Plains. I think I like the fields a lot better. (draws) Shit. Damn bandits!
(The night continues. We watch Kyou Kara Maou, Castle in the Sky, Pretear, and drink sparkling grape juice & cider. We squirt silly string all over BK's basement and go to bed 3 AM. We have waffles for breakfast.)
BK: And such was New Year's, 2006-2007.
IWA: Standard disclaimer applies.
A/N: By the way, this entire chapter (almost) is a recap of Alchemy and Saiyans and Gohan in Amestris. It's Ed explaining things to Russel, though, so it's gonna be pretty funny. It made BK laugh when she beta-ed it. It's also going to be pretty short. Sorry 'bout that. And if you find any mistakes in the timeline, please tell me.
"Speaking" Thoughts (Me to you)
Last time:
Ed rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Come on, we're going into the hall. You're too distracted," the shorter blond announced, grabbing the other's arm and dragging him out of the room.
Russel yelped again, following the diminutive State Alchemist into the hallway.
Chapter 15: Overview
"Okay, let's see here," Ed started. "Paying attention now?" he asked, waving his hand n Russel's face.
The other blond caught the wayward hand. "Yes, Ed, I'm paying attention."
"Good." Ed yanked his hand back. "Let's see, where to start..."
"The beginning would be nice..." Russel interjected dryly.
Ed glared at him. "Yeah. I know. I was trying to figure out where the beginning was. Well, a few months ago I got dumped in this place called Chikyuu. While looking for a way to get back I met those guys," he gestured back to the kitchen, "and found out some really weird stuff." Russel quirked an eyebrow. "Anyway, we've got two-way communication between Mustang's office and Capsule Corp. A few weeks after I got back, Gohan popped up, and I wound up teaching him alchemy,—" (Russel shook his head pityingly) "—didn't get very far, though. Then me, Gohan, and a few others went back and got all seven of Chikyuu's Dragonballs—" (he held up the Amestris one) "—together, summoned the dragon god, didn't get our wish granted, and now we're here to find these seven and wish again. Hopefully this time it'll work." He looked up hopefully, panting slightly. "Any questions?"
Russel looked skeptically at him. "Riiight. You glossed over so much there, I don't even know where to start." He thought for a moment. "Let's start with how did you get there in the first place?"
Ed blinked. "That's a very good question. When I figure it out, I'll let you know."
Russel stared. "Oookay. Umm... How about 'those guys'. They're not exactly normal, are they?"
"Well, if by not normal you mean not entirely human, yeah. They aren't."
Russel blinked, dumbfounded. "'Not entirely human'?" he parroted.
Ed put his head in his hands. "Ooh, I shouldn't have said that. Well, you see, there's this alien race called Saiyans. I don't know much about them, but from what I do know, they're insanely strong, fast, eat a lot—" (Russel snorted. "No kidding.") "—can fly, and can shoot energy out of their hands like weapons."
"Uhh... I'll have to take your word for a lot of that. So, what's this whole 'Dragonball', 'dragon god' thing?"
Ed sighed explosively. "Whew boy. Give me the hard ones, whydontcha? Uhh, well, if you get all seven Dragonballs together, you can summon the dragon god and he'll grant a set number of wishes. The Chikyuu dragon god was called Shenlong. I don't know what ours is. And don't ask me how it works—the summoning or the wishes. I don't know. Anything else?"
Russel blinked. "Not really, not with the way you glossed over everything so quickly. And anyway, I'm suffering from a severe case of brain overload. It'll take a while to assimilate all that."
"Good. I'm gonna go pack," Ed finished, and walked off.
Russel blinked, turned, and walked into the kitchen. Fletcher and Al were sitting at the table, Bulma was cooking something breakfasty for Fletcher, who looked very sleepy, and there was a mountain of dishes in the sink. Russel guessed, with the part of his mind that wasn't in the middle of an information-overload-induced black out, that they had come from underneath the food the... 'Saiyans', wasn't it?... had inhaled. He wrenched his attention back to sitting at the table, determined not to fall and make an idiot out of himself, as his legs seemed to want to do.
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/poof/
Russel and Fletcher stared.
"What... is that...?" Russel managed weakly after a few false starts.
Ed grinned at him. "It's a plane. It flies, believe it or not."
"How?"
Ed shrugged. "Don't look at me. I don't know."
"Ed, we're going!" Bulma called, sticking her head out of the doorway into the plane.
"Be there in a sec!" Ed called back.
Bulma, satisfied, disappeared fully back into the plane.
"Well, see ya," Ed said, extending a hand to Russel, who smiled and clasped it.
"It was good to see you again, Ed."
"You too. Bye Fletcher!" Ed called back over his shoulder, already jogging towards the plane.
Russel and Fletcher remained there, waving until the plane was out of sight.
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IWA: Chapter 15 is now typed!
BK: (grumbles) Took you long enough...
IWA: Sorry! (ducks, but BK doesn't try to hit her) Well, questions, comments, feedback? Review! Review! Review!
BK: (shakes head) Sorry, she's been hyper all day...
IWA: (continues chanting "Review!" until you leave this page, then her voice cuts out)