Part 4

Tommy exited Katherine's room subdued and pensive, barely sparing Jason or Kimberly a look. They fell into step behind him as he headed for the elevators. He hit the call button, seeming to be wrestling with something in his thoughts before finally turning to look at them. "Ready, Kim?"

She nodded. Jason hugged her, which she returned.

"Don't kill each other."

"We'll try not to."

"Good." Jason extended his hand to Tommy. "I'm going to hang here with Kat and keep her company. Just call if you guys need anything, okay?"

"Thanks."

The men shook hands as the elevator arrived on the floor. Jason left to rejoin Kat as Tommy and Kimberly stepped into the crowded elevator. Several interns were inside, forcing them against one wall. Kimberly was pressed up against him as the elevator stopped on the next floor to allow two more people to get on. Tommy's hands settled on her hips to steady her as he shifted, easing the crunch around her.

Kimberly almost smiled - she was pretty sure the gesture was unconscious - at the courtesy she showed her. She couldn't though - just the feel of his hands, of the way he sheltered her with the barest of touches, had sent her pulse hammering a mile a minute. It made hope blossom in her chest when she had no right to hope for anything. But she couldn't stop it. Instead she stood stiffly, doing her best not to end up squished against him like a sardine.

The elevator ride was mercifully short with everyone filing off on the main floor. Having been pushed to the back, they were the last ones off, and Tommy dropped his hands the second she had room to move. She was partially grateful, but found the greater part of her wishing he wanted to touch her like he'd once wanted to.

Katherine's comments led her to believe that Tommy had tried to move beyond their break, but events hadn't permitted him time to heal. With Rita and now the Machine Empire after him, she couldn't say she was really surprised. A part of her was even wondering if she'd done him any favors by returning his memory.

Wouldn't it have been easier to simply allow him to continue thinking he was King and not get involved? Easier for Tommy perhaps, but deadly for the rest of her friends and the world. No matter how much she might have wanted to leave him like that, to give him the chance to build a completely new him, the time and the premise had been wrong. Tommy had never been an evil person - their enemies had simply tried to warp him. Eventually he would likely have regained his memories and been crippled by guilt.

No; things were better now even if they were harder.

They exited the hospital without a word and stopped on the sidewalk out front. "Where to, Kim?"

She shrugged. "Some place private - where we won't get interrupted or overheard."

"You have a lot to say to me then?"

Boy did she ever - she just didn't know if he wanted to hear it. "I have some things to say which are better kept between us."

He stared at her intensely, as if trying to read her mind. She stared right back, waiting. The choice of venue was up to him; she wanted him as comfortable as he could be for this. He didn't seem inclined to be forth coming with a location though.

She ventured an option. "How about your uncle's cabin?"

He blinked. "I'd rather not have you there."

"Then where, Tommy? The lake? Do you want everyone and their dog eavesdropping on our personal matters?"

"I was thinking the command center."

"I'd rather not have Zordon and Alpha offering their advice, thank you very much. Imposing this ridiculous condition on you keeping your-" she cut herself off as two interns turned to look their way curiously. "Look, we're heading for a fight, so let's not make it public. Your Uncle's cabin is remote, and we don't have to talk inside if you don't want to."

He glanced around them, noting that their postures - toe-to-toe and glaring at one another - seemed to be drawing some looks. He eased back as she did, winding down momentarily from the anger clawing through him. "I hate it when you're logical."

"No, you hate it when I'm right."

"That too." He grabbed her by the upper arm, hauling her down the sidewalk.

Kimberly pried his fingers off. "That's enough of that, Tommy Oliver! I'm not going to run out on you."

"You already did once. I can't trust you not to again."

Ouch. "So lock me up and throw away the key. Here." She grabbed the back of his shirt and hauled him into a momentarily deserted alleyway. "Let's finish this elsewhere."

Tommy hit the teleportation button on his communicator and it whisked them away from prying eyes.

They landed moments later in the pre-sun set light outside Tommy's Uncle's cabin. There were no lights and no smoke coming from the chimney, indicating that they were in fact alone. Kimberly stepped away from him, turning to meet him head on.

"Now just what did you mean by not being able to trust me? I came for you, Tommy; I came to your rescue, I never stopped wanting to be your friend and I never stopped caring. I thought I made that plain."

"Oh, your actions spoke loud enough, Kimberly." He almost spat the words at her, throwing them down like a gauntlet. "Sending me a letter because you couldn't tell me to my face that you and Jason were involved - because you cared too much to consider what it would do to me?"

"I didn't-"

"Spare me!" He spun away, his hands clenching at his sides. His shoulders heaved as she saw him physically controlling his anger. "Did Kat ever tell you where I was when I got your letter?"

"No, but I sent it to the Rec center. I figured you'd be there like you always were."

"And I was - with the rest of the gang." He turned, his expression unreadable. "Picture that you're practicing on your beam and a latter arrives from someone all of your friends know and someone special to you. Picture having one of your friends open it at your request and then reading it aloud - for everyone to hear - and the contents being what you sent me."

Kimberly's eyes widened as she covered her mouth in amazed horror. She hadn't known. She'd thought Tommy had read it in private and told the other Rangers about it - not that they'd read it to him. She wanted to sink into the ground and disappear. Sending the letter had been a mistake, that he'd had it read to him in the group only compounded it.

His expression remained impassive, but the hurt in his eyes was unmistakable. "I see you can. Picture it, Kim. Only seconds after your entire world gets upended one of your friends asks if you're alright. What do you say to him or her? What can you say? That you feel like your chest is on fire? Like someone is reaching into your chest and ripping your heart out? Or do you pretend that everything's okay because you really don't understand the why or the how of things?"

"Oh Tommy..."

"Don't 'Oh Tommy' me!" He glared at her. "I've spent the months since that day counting hours and minutes until tomorrow and hoping the pain goes away. I've spent my days wishing for an attack so I can do the only thing that gives me drive and now you come back and threaten to take that away from me too. What did I ever do to you Kim? What did I do to deserve this?"

She swallowed hard. Nothing. He'd never done anything and she'd been a fool.

Tommy stalked away from her, stopping at the tree line several yards away and placing both hands against one of the trunks. She could see his knuckles whitening from where she stood as he reigned in his temper once more. She didn't move, didn't even try and approach him - every line in his posture screamed pain and she didn't know how to soothe it.

"Just answer me one thing, Kim."

He didn't look at her, forcing her to speak. "Just one?"

"Yeah, just one. Did you mean what you said back in the arena? About hurting me deliberately because you didn't want me coming after you?"

And here it was. She wanted to smile, to reassure him that it had been a shock tactic to get him to come out of his trance, but she couldn't. Because it had been the truth. She'd pushed him away because she'd been terrified that if he'd come after her, he'd have proven her choice to be the wrong one. A choice and a mistake she'd had to make on her own. Four months was a long time to ponder his loss from her life. Her throat was dry when she finally spoke. "I meant it. I knew that letter would hurt you, no matter what I wrote."

He held up his hand, stopping her, and turned. "Then why, Kim? All I wanted was for you to follow your dream."

"Because this..." she pointed to him and then towards herself, "thing between us was too intense. I was scared, a long way from home and starting to doubt what we had."

"You couldn't have just told me that instead?"

"I should have. I've been regretting it ever since."

"Regretting..." He shook his head. "What could you possibly know about regrets, Kim? You're following your dream, you're in the program you didn't think you could make, you're headed for Pan Globals and you have the support of every person in your life."

"Except you."

"I said in your life, not previously in it." He leaned back against the tree, crossing his arms over his chest as he glared at her. "You did a nice job of cutting me out."

"I never should have, Tommy. For what it's worth, I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" He laughed harshly. "You're sorry? Sorry for what, Kim? You just told me your actions were deliberate - you were trying to push me away - and you succeeded."

"What do you expect me to say, Tommy? That I agonized over that stupid piece of paper? Would you like me to admit that I spent the better part of a week composing it? Alright - I did!" She hurled the words at him like spikes of anger. "I even asked Jason's help on it and he told me I was taking the coward's way out. I didn't listen because I knew I could never tell you in any other way."

"Well you should have Kim. Any way except the way you did. Do you know what it's like to lose your girlfriend and your best friend all in the same moment?"

She did. She'd lost him when he'd never written her back. She nodded, but he never gave her the chance to speak.

"Do you know what it's like finding out weeks later and completely by accident that the guy you think of like a brother is the one your girlfriend left you for? Have you any clue what it feels like to wonder day in and day out what you did wrong and not having a clue? You stole my chance for closure with that stupid piece of paper Kim. Not only that, but you hurt Kat in the process!"

"Leave her out of this!"

He pressed on, ignoring her outburst. "Did you laugh when she asked how you'd feel if she and I became a couple Kim? Did you get a good kick out of her replacing you in every way?"

Kimberly stalked towards where he remained semi-lounged against the tree, coiled for action. "I didn't laugh, damn you Tommy. I couldn't laugh. I told her I was happy you felt you could move on and I hung up the phone." Her glare lost some of its force. "I cried myself to sleep for a week afterwards."

"I doubt that."

"It's true, you hard headed pain in the-"

"What'd you have to cry about, Kim? You're the one who dumped me - if I wanted to explore other options you have no right to feel bad."

"Don't you think I know that?" Her anger drained away, leaving her feeling limp and vulnerable - and wishing he'd hold her just once more. "I gave up any claim, any right to call you mine the moment I mailed that letter. I should never have put it in the mail box, Tommy. I shouldn't have-"

"There we agree." He pushed away from the tree, walking towards the cabin. "There were a lot of things we shouldn't have done, Kim, but we did them and we have to live with the consequences. It's part of life, part of growing up." He turned to face her once he was several yards away again, keeping space between them.

"But part of growing up is moving on, and you haven't, Tommy. If you had, Zordon would never have stepped in. Katherine wouldn't have told me about your strange behavior, she wouldn't be leaving because of this mess, and we wouldn't be sitting here screaming at each other like five year old children over spilled milk!"

They glared at one another for a long minute before the anger seemed to ebb somewhat, Kimberly's comment breaking down the first of the barriers between them. Something changed in his posture, as if he suddenly realized something important.

Kimberly tempered her tone. "We used to be able to talk about our differences, Tommy. Even while dating, we were friends first."

"Friends." The word passed unbidden through his lips like a mournful sigh. "Is that what this is, Kim? Friendship? Because friends trust each other, believe in one another and support each other's dreams - you destroyed mine."

She flinched, taking an involuntary step backwards. "I never wanted..." She stopped. That wasn't exactly true. A part of her had wanted to hurt him, but only enough that he wouldn't chase her - not enough to truly do damage. What could she tell him, what could she say that would ease his pain - if anything? "I never meant for any of this to happen."

"Small comfort, Kim. A very small comfort. With Kat leaving, I'm losing the confidant I gained in your absence - like history is repeating itself."

"Only this time there's one big difference. They're going to retire the Pink Power coin."

He stared at her. "Kat said you were taking back the power coin, not retiring it."

"I haven't said yes."

"So we'll find someone who will."

Kimberly shook her head. "Tommy, don't you see? This rage you have, the pain inside you, it needs to be dealt with. They're retiring the coin because of you - because you called Kat my name, because you're reckless and distracted with it. Because of me."

"It all comes back to you, doesn't it Kimberly?" His tone was laced with bitterness and regret. "Always you. You sent me a letter that turned my world upside down and haven't stopped doing so since."

"I thought if I gave you space..."

"Space?" He shook his head mockingly. "What's space going to do when you're a Power Ranger? Space just means more time for Rita, or Mondo or whomever to jump in and try to take over the world. If you'd had any consideration for my feelings at all, if you hadn't been thinking only about yourself, this whole mess never would have happened!"

"Alright, so I'm a selfish witch." Her admission was calm. "I'm a self-centered, egotistical, pampered princess who thinks of no one but herself and her dreams. There. Does it make you feel better having me say it?"

"A little."

His concession would have made her smile under other circumstances, but Kimberly knew just what exactly the terms of this battle were. She nodded once. "Anything else you'd like to hear me say that will help?"

A ghost of a smile crossed his lips. "That you were wrong, Kim."

Kimberly did smile this time, her gaze locking on his, as he gave her the opening she'd been hoping for. "I was wrong Tommy. Wrong to leave Angel Grove to chase a dream I can achieve but wouldn't have without your support. I was wrong to think Jason and I could be more than friends and you and I could be less than what we were. I was wrong to send you that letter, to doubt your feelings and my own. I was wrong to think we couldn't continue on as we were and that our relationship couldn't survive. I was wrong to let you go."

His expression didn't change, but she almost sensed a shift in his mood. The dark cloud seemed to lift from his eyes in that moment and while the pain was still there, the edge of grief and anger seemed to have been tempered by her words. His voice dropped to an agonized whisper she had to strain to hear.

"Do you mean it?"

"Every word."

He bowed his head, closing his eyes, and her heart ached for him. She could almost see the struggle he was fighting with himself. He wanted to believe her, needed to believe her, but didn't know if he could trust her. That hurt more than anything; to know that she'd lost his trust and she had no one to blame but herself.

"I know you probably don't want to be anywhere near me right now, Tommy. I don't deserve any kind of consideration for the way I've treated you, and I won't hold it against you if you tell me no - but I'd really like to hug you right now."

He laughed shakily, the first time she'd hear him laugh - really laugh - since the whole fiasco began. "It would serve you right if I told you no, Kim."

"Does that mean you won't?"

He lifted his head and looked at her frankly. "No, but you have to make the first move this time. I won't be played for a fool again."

"That's fair."

She closed the distance between them in barely a heart beat and looked up at him, searching his face as she stood close. His face betrayed nothing, but she didn't let it deter her. Sliding her arms around his waist, she took that final baby step and laid her head against his chest. She felt him sigh softly under her cheek. It took several moments before his arms came up to wrap securely around her, his head coming down to rest on the top of hers. Tension ebbed from his frame and he began to shake in her arms.

"I've missed you, Tommy. Missed you so much it hurts." She whispered the words against his shirt, feeling the sting of tears as the agony of the last several months became poignantly clear. She'd given up the chance at something more with someone else, when all she'd ever wanted was standing once again in the circle of her arms.

Moisture touched her cheek. One drop, then two, but she stayed where she was, not saying a word - simply offering silent support and acceptance. She closed her eyes, letting a single tear slip from the corner of her eye. She had no right to cry, but in that single tear she let everything go. She didn't know if and how things would change when they finally parted, but for now, Tommy was wrapped in her arms and clinging to her like a man clings to a life preserver in the middle of the ocean.

And - for the moment - it was enough.

Author's Note:: I had originally planned to end it there, but I know, everyone wants to know what happens next. Do they reconcile, does Kim resume her duties as the Pink Ranger or are the powers retired, does Tommy get reinstated as the Red Ranger now that they've had their talk, or is Zordon going to force an issue... Do Tommy and Kim get back together despite all that's happened - will Kat stick around to be with Jason... ;) So, with those questions in mind, expect a part 5 – eventually… Thanks for reading guys!