...Cupid swooped in from above and snatched the chest right out of Artemis' hands! With a maniacal laugh he flew off, clutching the treasure that was painstakingly dug up by the other group.
"Ha ha!" he called out gleefully. "See ya later suckers."
This action was met with mixed reactions. Ares swore loudly and began smashing up a tree with his shovel, Artemis immediately reached for her bow and shot arrows after Cupid, Athena screeched and ran off into the trees after Cupid, Briseis crumpled to the ground and began rocking back and forth and biting her nails again. After about ten minutes Athena returned and the group gathered themselves together and made for the finish line, with Ares muttering under his breath about swearing and avenging and Cupid and betrayal.
Cupid sped through the forest, expertly dodging the volley of arrows Artemis shot after him. He clutched the chest to his...chest and cackled delightedly, the treasure was theirs. Ha, he thought gleefully, who's the useless one now Hector. Zooming over the treetops he had a splendid view of all the other teams. Hermes, Hephaestus and Hercules were all trying to revive Helen with no luck, she had obviously been soaked in water, slapped on the face numerous times and dragged across some tough terrain. Cupid giggled and decided to help, he yelled out,
"Hey Helen, your make-up and hair's completely ruined."
Her teammates looked up just as Helen woke up. She screeched loudly as she discovered the state of her clothes, hair and make-up. Her teammates looked down. Cupid flew off.
The next team he passed was Psyche's. She was bossing her group around, keeping Persues and Phineus apart and encouraging Persephone who was deciphering the map and leading them. They were actually making good progress, unfortunately they were making good progress in the wrong direction, towards the heart of the Forbidden Forest instead of skirting around the edges like all the other teams. Cupid shrugged, right now his team was his priority. What could be so bad about the middle of the forest anyway? He hurried on.
He flew over a river and was met with a most hilarious sight. Aphrodite was floundering around in waist-deep water, her hair and make-up a complete mess. Achilles was yelling at her to get out of the water but she was too preoccupied with the 'scary slimy fishies' in the water. Apollo was rolling around laughing his blond head off and Andromeda was giggling uncontrollably. Cupid sighed and grabbed Aphrodite by her tangled hair and dumped her unceremoniously on the muddy bank. She stood up quite self-consciously and brushed herself off, haughtily ignoring Apollo and Andromeda. she then turned to smooth her dress down but promptly tripped and landed on an ant nest. Cupid took off with Aphrodite's screech ringing in his ears.
Narcissus groaned sat up. There was a pain in his chest that was killing him and, even worse, he was sure that his carefully gelled hair was messed up. He quickly checked his hair in the small hand mirror. Yep, a few strands were out of place. He reached up and rearranged it so it looked fashionably windswept. Now for the pain in the chest. There appeared to be an arrow embedded in it.
"How did that happen?" he wondered aloud, wrenching it out.
Before he had a chance to remember, there was a loud crash, leaves and twigs showered his face and a wooden chest dropped onto his lap. He stared at it.
"Omigosh," he cried, hopping up, "I found the treasure! The others better thank me for that. Oh I am such a genius."
He did a funny little dance of victory before setting off to find the rest of his team. He was so preoccupied with his own cleverness, he failed to see Cupid slowly drift to the ground, glassy eyed and feathered wings bent strangely out of shape.
Jason fired arrow after arrow at the scorpion. The sleeping potion, while having a massive effect on Narcissus, was doing the scorpion no harm at all. In fact it seemed even more enraged and advanced on Jason even faster. He was down to his last three arrows and he was getting a little worried.
"Oh man," Jason breathed, "I'm so dead."
Suddenly there was a strangled scream and a blond and blue...thing...came hurtling out of nowhere straight into the giant scorpion. The scorpion stumbled under the impact of whatever it was and collapsed into a large tangle of orange and purple legs. The thing was screaming its head off about treasure and looked vaguely like Narcissus on a bad hair day (a rare event). Jason moved closer and stared at it incredulously. It was Narcissus and he did appear to have really messed up hair.
"I found it! I found it!" he screeched loudly, "I found the treasure thingie!"
Jason just stared. Narcissus suddenly appeared to realise his rather...ruffled appearance. He immediately stopped shouting and began smoothing down his hair, dropping the chest on the ground near one of the scorpion's legs. Jason stopped staring and picked up the box.
"Oh right," Narcissus said, "that's the treasure, I found it."
Jason looked questioningly at Narcissus.
"The treasure, T-R-E-S-H-O-R-E," Narcissus spelled painstakingly slowly, "you know, the purpose of this whole thing?"
"How do you know it's the treasure we're looking for," Jason asked.
"Well, DUH!" Narcissus attempted to roll his eyes but failed miserably, instead looking like he had some mutant disease, "it says 'Property of Poseidon, Do Not Touch Unless on Treasure Hunt'. Hey are we allowed to touch it?"
Jason sighed.
"Hey where Orion and Paris?"
As if on cue, the pair ran out of the forest and into Narcissus. He was knocked out for the second time that day. The unconscious Narcissus toppled over and landed face first into the brook.
"Nice job guys," Jason said.
Hector strode around the clearing, occasionally glancing up at the sky as though he expected someone to come flying down with treasure. Dionysus was chuckling quietly to himself swigging from a huge bottle of Coke. Echo was following Hector around and was mimicking everything he said, which, to her annoyance was nothing at all.
"Okay everyone," said Hector, "let's go find Cupid."
"Okay everyone," mimicked Echo in an annoying high pitched voice that sounded nothing like Hector's, "let's go find Cup-"
"Glad you second my idea Echo," Hector replied stoutly, "Now lets get a move on. Where's the map?"
Dionysus produced a soggy mass of wet paper. "Tah-dah!"
Hector took it with a slightly disgusted expression. It smelled faintly of coke and...drool?
"Why you little...!"
Cupid shifted uncomfortably in his bed, hmm he didn't remember having leaves in his bed...or branches...or bugs. With a start he sat up and noticed that he was not, in fact, in bed. He was in...a forest? The Forbidden Forest. The treasure hunt. It was all coming back to him now. They were on the treasure hunt and he had...the treasure! Cupid patted the dirt around him, shifting leaves in search of the chest. OMG he lost the chest! Hector was going to KILL him. Cupid tried to remember what had happened. He was flying...then pain and darkness. And a head of shiny blond hair, Narcissus! He had the treasure! With new resolve Cupid rose unsteadily and flew off, heading back towards his group.
Ares fumed silently. He couldn't believe they were so close to the treasure. That little rascally Cupid, he was gonna pay for all this. Ares unconsciously bunched his hands into fists, oh yeah, that Cupid was gonna pay alright. Then he noticed the rest of his group looking at him strangely, then he realised he'd been talking aloud and swinging punches at an invisible foe. He flushed and pretended he was swatting bugs away. Briseis let out a little giggle which Ares studiously ignored. They walked on.
Suddenly a large spider dropped down from the branch in front of Ares. He gave a shrill shriek and attempted to swat the spider away, the spider evaded his hands and yelled angrily,
" Oi, stop waving your huge hand around like some maniac. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't swat the insects away too, a spider's got to eat you know." With that it disappeared back into the trees leaving a shell shocked Ares .
"Well don't just stand there," Artemis said with a hint of suppressed laughter in her voice, "let's get going, we wouldn't want to be stuck in here at night now would we?'
With a shudder Ares kept moving, ignoring the snorts of mirth coming from the girls. He just hoped none of his friends ever found out about him being verbally abused by a giant possibly man-eating spider and laughed at by girls.
They group kept moving, following what appeared to be a heavily overgrown path. The trees seemed to melt away as they reached the edge of the forest, the finish line, and noticed Poseidon waiting there for them.
"Huzzah!" he yelled when he saw the group, "group number one! But where's the treasure? This is a treasure hunt you know."
Ares growled and went on to explain how that conniving beastly Cupid stole the treasure chest and flew off with it. Artemis, Athena and Briseis backed away slowly when his voice got louder and louder and smoke started coming out of his ears. Poseidon waved them off and continued to listen to Ares' speech about exactly how evil and sneaky and rude Cupid was. The girls went to the stables and looked at the horses.
"Phew, I'm glad that's over," Briseis said wearily, "what do we have next period?"
Helen screamed and screamed and screamed.
"Jeez, put a sock in it would ya?" Hermes was standing next to her with his hands over his ears and a pained expression.
Helen stopped screaming and saw that her team mates were looking at her with concerned expression. She immediately remembered the reason for her excessive screaming. A murderous light leapt into her eyes.
"Right," she said angrily, jumping up to her feet, "who made that comment about my hair and make-up? Own up!"
It seemed strange that such a loud voice would come from such a petite girl. Her team mates glanced at each other. If they told her, then they would probably find Cupid's dead body outside the school gate as a warning to the next person who was thinking about insulting Helen of Troy.
"Erm, maybe it was...er...your imagination?" Hephaestus suggested hopefully.
"Oh boy, muttered Hermes, "no one is that stupid Hephaestus."
As it turned out, Helen was that stupid. "Oh," she said quietly. Then she flounced away and began redoing her perfect unsmudged make-up.
"Um Helen,"said Hephaestus, "we really don't have time for this. Cupid's group got the treasure so we probably have to head to the finish line now."
Helen ignored him and began opening a jar of facial cream.
"Er Helen?" began Hercules. He never understood why girls had to look their best at all times. "We really have to get back."
"If you don't then all the scary forest monsters would come out and gobble you up," said Hermes. Even he thought that it was a stupid thing to say but it might work on Helen.
There was no such luck.
"I give up," muttered Hermes under his breath.
Suddenly Helen let out a high pitched shriek. All three boys jumped. "What?" asked Hercules looking slightly unnerved.
"My god, I forgot to pack my mascara," she cried, "we have to go to the finish line so we can end this stupid lesson and I can go get it. Come on, what are you guys waiting for? Get moving."
Hercules, Hephaestus and Hermes glanced at each other. "Okay..."
Poseidon smiled as the second group came into view. However, they did not seem to have the chest. He sighed exasperatedly, did these people think he sent them into the forest for a picnic? As they approached, he forced a smile on his face.
"Hello," he said in the most pleasant voice he could muster, "you are the second team to arrive."
The group ignored his cheery manner and lay down on the grass to relax. Helen was attempting to hide her face with one large flowing sleeve so others could not see her without mascara, not that they really cared. Hephaestus was mumbling to himself and staring at the sky. Hermes and Hercules were in a conversation about which sport could get you the most injuries. Ares attempted to join them but they were pointedly ignoring him so he went off by himself and waited for Aphrodite to return.
There was a series of screams and a huge crashing sound and Achilles, Andromeda, Apollo and Aphrodite emerged from the forest. Both Achilles and Aphrodite were dripping with water and Apollo and Andromeda were in uncontrollable giggles. Ares immediately rushed to hug Aphrodite then noticed that she was completely wet, a factor he did not see until she had hurtled into his arms. He patted her wet back awkwardly and winced as something (possibly a spider he thought, shuddering) crawled out of her voluminous skirts and onto him and began its way down his leg. Artemis had hopped up, rushed over and embraced her brother as he made his way towards them, glancing curiously at the trail of water following Achilles and Aphrodite. Likewise, Briseis hugged Achilles tightly before sitting down and inspecting her ragged nails.
After all the hugging and embracing was finished, Poseidon began his welcome. "Congratulations," he said, "you are the third team-"
The people ignored them and began chatting excitedly with each other about their experiences in the forest.
Poseidon rolled his eyes, a trait that he had learned from his brother Zeus who used it whenever Hera was talking. "No-one ever appreciates me anymore,"he muttered.
"Guys!" yelled Cupid. "Guys, where are you?"
He was answered with some strangled yelling that came from somewhere to his right. He listened hard. Yep, that definitely sounded like Hector. And, as he moved closer, he could make out the shrill scream of Echo and bursts of giggles from Dionysus.
"Guys, Narcissus got the treasure and-" Cupid broke off with a gasp as Hector jumped on him and began strangling him.
"What?!?!" he yelled, his face a mask of fury.
Echo gasped behind him and even Dionysus stopped giggling for a second, but decided Cupid's face was a most amusing shade of purple.
"Woah, chill dude," wheezed Cupid, fighting to breathe.
"I told you to find the treasure. Find. The. Treasure." Hector shouted, spraying spit everywhere, "or didn't that get through your thick head? Huh?"
"We just have to find Narcissus' group before they get to the finish line," Cupid choked out.
"Oh yeah, like's that's so easy," snarled Hector, "they're probably ALREADY there you imbecile! You-"
Dionysus tapped Hector on the shoulder mid-rant, shook his head put his finger to his lips and gestured for him to listen. In the silence the group could hear Narcissus bragging about how he found the treasure, Jason telling him to shut up and Paris and Orion arguing about who chickened out first.
Hector's eyes widened and he released his death grip on Cupid who immediately collapsed and began gasping for air.
"You screamed first," yelled Paris.
"So? You screamed the loudest," bawled Orion.
"You screamed like a girl."
"Did not. You started running away first."
"Only because you were too scared to run. Anyway, you followed."
"You-"
"Guys!" yelled Jason. "Shut up. We have to get the treasure back to Poseidon before some other group finds out."
At that moment, a silver arrow flashed out of nowhere and sank into his ankle. He gaped like a fish out of water for a few seconds before the sleeping potion took over and he crumbled slowly to the ground. A bombard of arrows followed. Narcissus let out a girlish scream and ducked for cover. Orion rolled his eyes and nocked an arrow to his bow, ignoring the hail of arrows that were zipping past his ears. At an afterthought, Paris did the same. The two of them were the best at archery in the class, excluding Artemis and Apollo.
Orion took a step backwards and accidentally stepped on something. The something beneath his foot cracked and split in half, causing him him to topple over and land flat on his back. Out of the corner of his eye he saw an empty cracked coke bottle rolling away before the happy face of Dionysus dominated his vision. Giddiness was plastered across his delicate features and he held a bow and arrow in his hands.
"Nighty-night," he chirped.
Dionysus released the arrow and it flew backwards into his own face. He collapsed, shrieking in pain. Orion sat up thanking his lucky stars, though there was not much need to. Anybody could've seen that Dionysus was holding both the bow and the arrow the wrong way around.
Narcissus had fainted sometime before the battle began so he was left alone. Now that he was awake, he shot up and stared. It was almost like a battle straight out a movie scene. Arrows flew everywhere, most of them missing their target by miles, and it was complete with its own soundtrack. He frowned. This wasn't a movie, this was real life, and real life wasn't supposed to have 'Oops I Did It Again' by Britney Spears playing as background music. The music was coming from a pocket on his Levi jacket. He reached in, pulled out his mobile phone and flipped it open.
"Hi mummy, it's Narcie-bear. Yes, everything is fine here, mummy, and I did pack my Paddington pajamas so you don't need to come over here and bring them and-oops. I just dropped my mirror, silly me." Narcissus bent over to pick up his fallen mirror. At that exact moment Hector fired an arrow at him which sped past his head so close that it skimmed through his blond curls. "Gosh! I wonder what that was...no mummy I wasn't talking to you, I thought I felt something in my hair. Yeah yeah, might have been a bug. Yeah. Yes mummy I am using the new conditioner you bought me, mm-hmm. Ohh what's that?" Narcissus bent over to look at a shiny gold rock on the ground just as a second arrow whistled through his hair. "Omigosh! Mummy I gotta go, I think I found gold! Bye mummy, yes I love you too. Bye!" Pocketing the lump of "gold" Narcissus strode off to find his teammates.
Paris and Hector faced off in a clearing, both eyeing each other warily. They were the only conscious ones remaining in their groups and both felt the need to get the treasure or at least die trying. In one smooth action Paris dropped the treasure chest and nocked an arrow only to look up and find Hector had done the same thing (minus the treasure chest dropping action).
"So brother, it's come to this," Hector said, grimly nudging his bow downwards so the arrow was aiming at Paris' legs instead of his heart.
Paris returned the favour, smiling sickly. This was gonna be fun. He adjusted his arrow briefly before firing, the arrow slamming into Hector's leg a second before he felt an arrow slamming into his own leg.
"OWWW! You little-" Hector's words were drowned out by a moan of pain from Paris. The Trojan princes sank to the ground at the same time.
Suddenly a blue blur burst into the clearing yelling at the top of his lungs about finding gold. Hector and Paris turned simultaneously at the sound of his voice and passed out, the image of a crazed Narcissus imprinted in their minds.
Narcissus stood in the clearing and spent a full minute staring at the unconscious princes. He then noticed the treasure chest and promptly forgot about the princes.
"Hurray! I found the treasure!"
While waiting for the other groups, Aphrodite and Helen had organised a truth or dare game to keep themselves occupied. They had 'somehow' managed to convince all their other classmates to join them, a method which involved the threat of a complete makeover and a rather murderous looking Ares standing standing behind them. Aphrodite placed an arrow on the ground in the middle of a large circle the group had formed.
"I'm going first," Helen squealed and spun the arrow. It landed on Apollo. "Truth, dare, double dare, truth command or torture?"
Apollo's eyes widened and he looked pleadingly at Artemis. She shook her head and grinned wickedly. Apollo sighed, he was going to regret this later. "Fine, double dare, with Artemis."
Helen began thinking really hard for a dare that would make both suffer. "Oh I've got one. Both of you are not allowed to make-up for the rest of the day."
Everybody stared at her, with the exception of Aphrodite who gave a dramatic gasp. Apollo and Artemis sighed in relief.
"Wow Helen, you really have like, a really mean streak!" Aphrodite exclaimed, unable to imagine the horrors of not being able to wear make-up for an entire day.
Suddenly Apollo felt a nudge in his side. Artemis was glaring daggers at him.She drew a hand across her neck. The meaning was extremely and painfully clear. Even though the dare was horribly easy, she still wasn't going to let him off for dragging her into this.
"Okay, my turn now," Apollo spun the arrow and it landed on Artemis. Thanking his lucky stars, Apollo dared her to not bash him up after the game was finished which she grudgingly agreed to.
Artemis, with a furious glare at a grinning Apollo, spun the arrow. It landed on Hermes. He was asked what mark he got on his end of year report and he easily said D-.The game progressed for sometime. It was Andromeda's turn to truth or dare someone. She leaned over onto her elbows and flicked at the arrow. It made four full revolutions before coming to a halt at...
"Narcissus!"
"I found the treasure, I found the treasure!" Narcissus yelled in a breathless voice. His hair was a complete mess with twigs and leaves stuck in it and his normally flawless face was streaked with grim.
"Oh well done," boomed Poseidon. "You got the treasure, unlike the rest of the idiots here. Come on everybody, let's go to recess."
"But the rest of the class is still in the forest-" began Athena.
"What are you complaining about," demanded Poseidon irritably, "you could've gotten the treasure yourself, but no, you just had to come back empty handed. Stop being a sore loser. Now Narcissus my boy, open the chest and see what you've got."
For some strange reason, whether from exhaustion or that he had seen his reflection in Helen's mirror, Narcissus had fainted. Ares irritably snatched the chest and opened it.
"Four coupons for horse-riding lessons from Poseidon?" he said stupidly after glancing inside.
Poseidon smiled cheerfully at him and let them out for recess.
Recess was packed with pomegranate tarts, muffins and fruit, a back-to-school present for Persephone from her mother, Demeter, who was the school chef. After a while, Hector's group and the rest of Narcissus' group returned.
Cupid bit hungrily into a pomegranate tart. "Hey," he said suddenly, "where's Psyche and her group?"
Back at the forest, Psyche was determinedly pushing her group further into the heart of the forest.
"Keep going," she said encouragingly, "we're nearly there."
Unheard by the four of them, the school bell rang to signal the end of recess and the beginning of their next lesson.