AN: Here is today's installment, enjoy!!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Teen Titans.

"All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither, deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, a light from the shadows shall spring"

- J.R.R. Tolkien

Chapter 9 – Midnight Wanderings

The sky was dark, yet the moon's glimmer still cascaded over Titan's Tower. Robin, Starfire, Raven and Beast Boy entered the Tower, after having gone out for dinner. Cyborg was still not back from his repair job. They had had quite a late dinner, and the hour of sleep was near. Beast Boy thought about that night's dinner. It had been a relatively quiet one, with none of the participants speaking. He looked over at Raven, who whisked past him, heading for her room. He was deeply confused about what he felt for Raven. He knew there was something lurking inside of him, but he couldn't believe that it was attraction. The thought of it was insane. They were like polar-opposites, always repelling each other since their first day as part of the team. But what else could explain the flutter of his heart, and jumping of his stomach whenever Raven was around. One thing was for sure, there was no way he was going to tell Raven, it would be the last thing she'd want to know. He knew that she despised him. He stumbled into his room; just trying to work out his own emotions would drive him insane.

Raven lay down on her bed, preparing for sleep. Her mind flashed back to her conversation with Beast Boy. That boy who perplexed her so. Just when she had began to believe she had grasped the measure of the changeling; he had altered so astoundingly that she now felt that she would never understand him. She couldn't shake his words out of her head. Because I care for you. It was as if he was addressing her fears directly, her fear of being hated, of not being wanted, of being alone. Perhaps she had always underestimated Beast Boy's insight into things. She pulled her sheets over her, shutting her eyes, confusing thoughts of Beast Boy still churning through her mind.

She was standing in a green field, grass enveloping the area. It seemed to go on forever, a never-ending park of some sort. Beast Boy appeared in front of her, looking into her eyes. A smile arose from his face, seeming glad to see her. I care for you came his voice. Abruptly his form exploded, giving way to a dragon. Fire flew from its tongue, setting the grass alight. The dragon disappeared, leaving her alone, amongst the flames. The heat was unbearable, yet she crawled out of the fire. Suddenly from the flames appeared her four friends. Nobody cares for you. How could anybody like you Raven? How could you even think that anybody could possibly like you? She turned away, running, running away from the flames. Leaving everything behind, she ran, but in the end she could never escape the darkness.

She was in the void again. Alone, in the dark. No one there to help her. No one there to care for her. So lonely. Cold. The breath of the darkness lay upon her, she could feel it. She lay sprawled on the ground. She couldn't get up. It was over. Nothing left to get up for. Just the darkness. Just the black. The cold confinements of the void. Tears fell from her eyes. And cold laughter resounded through the darkness, forever echoing in her mind.

Raven woke up, her body becoming upright abruptly, without pause. Her breathing was heavy and quick, her heart pounding against her ribs, as the memory of her nightmare bounced through her head. Was she to always be haunted by her dreams? Could she not get an ounce of sleep? Did she always have to suffer these incarnations of her mind? She stepped out of her room, knowing yet again that sleep would not arrive so soon. She walked into the common room, heading for the kitchen, tea on her mind.

"Hey Raven" came a voice. It was Beast Boy.

"Shit!" cried Raven in surprise, before quickly composing herself.

"What the hell are you doing awake, again?" yelled Raven, thoroughly irritated that Beast Boy had surprised her.

"Sorry…" murmured Beast Boy solemnly.

Raven's eyes softened, she shouldn't have gotten herself annoyed over something as small as that. She just hated being jumped on. She looked at Beast Boy, noticing something in his hand.

"Are you drinking… tea?" asked Raven abashedly, noticing the white tea cup that lay in Beast Boy's hands.

"Um… yea" admitted Beast Boy, unable to think of another answer.

Raven raised her left eyebrow, finding the fact that Beast Boy drank tea slightly amusing.

"I just wanted to try it out since you seem to enjoy it so much" continued Beast Boy sheepishly.

"Do you like it…?" asked Raven, unable to think of anything else to say.

"It's nice" replied Beast Boy softly.

Raven nodded her head, wondering where the conversation was going to go. "Mind telling me why you're up at midnight again?" questioned Raven.

"Too much on my mind… and I wanted to try some tea without people around" answered Beast Boy, looking at Raven.

She was intrigued. What thoughts could possibly keep Beast Boy awake? And since when did Beast Boy have things on his mind?

"What about you?" said Beast Boy.

"I couldn't get to sleep" muttered Raven, refining her answer.

Beast Boy didn't pursue the question. He didn't want to have another bleak conversation with Raven. Just seeing Raven was a relief to him. The two looked at each other, as growing silence crept into their dialogue. Beast Boy looked into Raven's violet eyes once more, wondering what thoughts lay beneath them.

Raven felt uncomfortable, the increasing silence was not something that she was enjoying. She was staring into Beast Boy's eyes. They were green, and seemed to glow with fervour. She looked down at the ground, no longer able to face the strength of his gaze. Turning away, she began to make herself some tea.

"Raven… about before" murmured Beast Boy softly, shattering the silence that had been entrenched between the pair.

Raven turned around, her mind going back to the conversation that had occurred previously.

"I hope you know that I meant what I said" said Beast Boy quietly.

She nodded, she couldn't deny that Beast Boy had spoken the truth, or what he thought was the truth.

Beast Boy let out a relieved sigh. "Good, because you need to know that you aren't alone"

"Beast Boy… you've changed so much" murmured Raven, voicing her thoughts involuntarily.

Beast Boy didn't know what to say. Was she criticising him, or complimenting him? He merely looked back at her face, pondering the connotations of what Raven had said.

"What happened to the old Beast Boy, the one who would irritate me, the one who would blurt out lame jokes or persist past the point of tolerability?" asked Raven softly.

"Maybe I just grew up…" murmured Beast Boy.

"Maybe" muttered Raven.

"Did I change… for the worse?" asked Beast Boy cautiously.

"No. It's just… your so different" whispered Raven.

Beast Boy smiled, "That's a relief" said Beast Boy, glad that Raven approved of the 'new model'.

"So why did you stop telling jokes?" asked Raven, "did you finally realise how bad they were?"

"Hey, they weren't that bad!" defended Beast Boy. He looked back at Raven, who stood waiting for an answer.

"I dunno why I stopped. I wanted to make you laugh, just once. To get you to smile was the goal of my life. When I was younger I had no doubts I could do it, but after years of trying I just… I just realised that you weren't gonna. I just realised that I could never do it" sighed Beast Boy.

Raven was taken aback. She had always known Beast Boy tried so hard to make her laugh, but she never really knew that he took his failures so personally.

"Well I did smile once" murmured Raven, trying to lighten Beast Boy's mood.

Beast Boy just looked back sceptically.

"The day the Titan's were formed… remember?" said Raven, softly.

He did. "Yea… you were the only person to think I was funny. Until Terra" muttered Beast Boy, without thinking.

Raven's face darkened. Memories of the blond girl flashed through her mind. She never thought it was possible for her to feel so much dislike for a person… even hate. Sure she had saved them, and the entire city from destruction, but her actions were inexcusable. She had had a choice between doing the right thing and the wrong thing, and she had chosen to do evil. And that was what angered Raven the most. She, herself, had never had a choice of her destiny, she had no choice but to bring evil into the world and there Terra was wasting her own choice.

Beast Boy saw Raven's eyes darken, and her face grow rigid, and knew he had made a mistake of mentioning Terra. He had known that Raven had harboured a deep dislike for the ex-Titan. Raven had always valued trust so highly, and she herself never did trust easily. Anyone who broke her trust earned her damnation.

"I'm sorry Raven" murmured Beast Boy quietly.

"No. We cannot keep all memories under lock and key" whispered Raven.

"Yet you do" said Beast Boy.

"And so do you" replied Raven without gumption.

Beast Boy thought about that. She was right, he never talked about his childhood, and he never wanted to either. And he knew she felt the same about her own youth. Maybe he was wrong in thinking that they were so different. Maybe they were more similar than he had previously thought.

"Not all memories can be hidden, and neither should all memories be unveiled" muttered Raven.

The two looked at each other, joined by their gaze yet separated in reality. Beast Boy stared at Raven, as if taking in an unsurmountable tower. He was lost in her eyes, a captivating violet that engulfed his mind. He couldn't look away, those purple irises that seemed to yearn at his soul. He felt as if he was trapped inside another dimension, a place of violet wonder and dark mysteries. Her pale skin contrasted with the enigmatic darkness of her eyes. Her skin seemed to accentuate her eyes, adding to their grace. Her soft violet hair slid down the side of her face, gleaming in the night. Beast Boy gazed at her, until his mind was imprinted with the image of her face, and his eyes branded with his thoughts of Raven.

"I should be getting some sleep" stammered Raven, before sweeping out of the room. Beast Boy watched her every step of the way.

Raven closed the door to her room. She had been unable to shake her own eyes from Beast Boy's green ones. She had seen the pure fire in his eyes, and it had held her in its vice. Those eyes were haunting, the strength in which he had gazed at her still sending her mind reeling. She slid into her bed, unable to take her mind off Beast Boy. That look. Closing her eyes, she let fatigue grab clumsily at her. And when the gentle palms of sleep wrapped around her, she drifted off, the emerald eyes of Beast Boy still haunting her.

AN: I love J.R.R. Tolkien. Also, I'm really unsure about swearing in this because whenever I right it in it feels weird imagining these characters actually swearing since they are so 'polite' in the cartoons. Still they'll be a lil bit, but not nearly enough to be noted. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I recommend everybody watch Jerry Maguire.