Gene sat still and silent watching her. Her face was pale, her eyes red and puffy. Her brown curls were messy and windswept and she kept shivering though it wasn't cold. Though she was trying her best not to look at him every so often the large brown eyes would meet his and the pain they betrayed almost killed him. She was beautiful even through her pain. It was all he could do to keep himself from taking her in his arms there and then and telling her how he felt. He wanted to hold her, to feel her body against his, to whisper in her ear that it would be alright, that he'd look after her and to hear her whisper back. Three little words.

Why the bloody hell did he have to do that stupid doodle? And at the station of all bloody places. It was a police station after all. Nothing stayed hidden in a police station. What his colleagues must think of him he didn't dare imagine. But that was nothing, nothing compared to how she was looking at him now. Like the very sight of him disgusted her.

The several full to the brim pints he'd spent the evening downing in Luigi's weren't doing anything to help his mood. If anything they made it worse. He knew Luigi had been right when, on serving him his third in less than an hour, he had cautiously suggested

" Perhaps Signor you have enough now si?".

Hunt had told him rather unceremoniously to "Piss off" but then quickly apologised because he knew that a) Luigi was right and b) it was his own fault he'd ended up here drinking away his misery and there was no need to take it out on the portly Italian. He'd finished that pint, a fourth and was the verge of ordering another when Luigi, most unusually for him, had refused to serve him anymore.

" I think Signor Hunt, drink will not help you. I think you don't want anymore really"

" Well c'mon then Quincy what do you reckon I want?"

At this the other man had smiled knowingly

" Go and talk to the lovely Signorina. I think she will not turn you away"

He could have argued but he didn't. What was the use? Luigi was right. The man had an uncanny knack for knowing exactly what was wrong with people and how they could fix it. The only option left was to try and talk to her. So here he was in her flat still a bit drunk sitting on stool watching her suffer and feeling like hell.

'Christ on a bloody bike she must 'ate me!' he thought 'probably thinks I was only

tryin' to get my bit'

Why couldn't he just say how he felt instead of resorting to filthy obscene disgusting smutty filth like that. Not that the mental images in conjured up weren't enjoyable. No not the time, not the bloody time. Ok no more stalling he had to do it, had to tell her the truth. 'Speak now or forever 'old your piece' he told himself.

" Look I know I shouldn't 'ave drawn it ….'an I was exactly planning on sharin' it with the 'ole class "

She looked up at him eyes flashing

" That's hardly the point is it? I mean do have any idea how…how degrading and..and embarrassing…"

she stopped her breathing rapid shaky, eyes wet

" I mean I might have expected that from Ray or even Chris but… not…I mean I though you lo.. thought you had more respect for me than that. Is that really all I am to you? A piece of meat?"

She was crying now, tears running down her cheeks.

" Well?" she asked sobbing hard now " Is it? Is that all I'm good for? Wham bam thank you bloody ma'am!"

" Course not" he softly leaning close to her " Come 'ere"

She hesitated for a moment then slid off her stool and moved closer. He reached out his arms and she let him put them round her waist but wouldn't come any closer. He pulled gently into him and felt her arms go round his waist. Still she refused to look at him. Cupping her chin in his hand he turned her head so she was facing him. Softly he placed a kiss on each eyelid tasting salty tears.

" No more tears little lady" he whispered " Oh god Alex I'm so sorry. I swear I never wanted to hurt you…I.."

He wished she'd say something, anything. But she wouldn't look at him never mind speak. God he'd lost her. He'd never forgive himself if that happened. How could he have been so stupid? All because he couldn't say those three little words that had plagued him for weeks. Now she would never know and he hated himself for it.

Now anger boiled inside him as well as everything else. Christ he'd go through Ray and the rest tomorrow. After Alex had run off earlier he'd had to get out too, had go cool off. He hadn't trusted himself to try and deal with his team at the time without literally giving them a hiding. But by god he wouldn't hold back tomorrow if things went to pot here tonight.

He had no idea how they'd gotten hold of it. He could have sworn he'd thrown it out. But that was beside the point. What had possessed them to parade it to the entire station like that was beyond him. Surely Ray and Chris of all people would have known what it meant, would have understood why he'd done it. But then maybe that was why. To take the piss out of him for wanting something his head kept telling him was well out of his league.

He looked at the woman in his arms again. She was resting her head on his chest, looking at the floor. She'd stopped crying now but her breaths were shaky and she was trembling slightly. Right there was only one thing for it. Gently he turned her face to him again. The anger was gone from her eyes now. All that was left was pain. She rested her cheek against his palm regarding him questioningly.

" Gene?…."

" I… I need to say something"

He took a deep breath, preparing himself. His heart was pounding so hard it wouldn't have surprised him if she heard it. He couldn't believe three little words could be so hard to say. But then the last time he'd said them he'd been hurt badly. However as he gazed down into Alex's soft open face he had the feeling that this would be different. This time he was safe.

Holding her close and hoping she knew he meant it with all his heart he said softly

" I love you"