17. Reason

"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone."
Rose Kennedy

Caras Galadhon Lothlorien May 5/ 38 Tuile 2976 III Age

Buffy had intentionally avoided Aragorn and Legolas since the party. Only a day had passed and as she lay in bed with morning sunlight casting a glow upon the room. She knew that avoiding them forever or completely wasn't an option. Her avoidance of each of them stemmed from different reasons. For Legolas it was because he could read her so well; he would know instantly that something was wrong. Aragorn on the other hand was a totally different story.

She'd felt something the night before last and she wasn 't sure what it was or even if she should trust the feeling if she knew. She hadn't felt so lost in anyone's eyes since Angel and look how that had turned out.

No, she was still cookie dough as far as she could tell. At least she didn't feel like she'd baked; and while thirty years had changed some things about her greatly it still didn't mean that she was ready to be a cookie.

She'd just have to treat Aragorn as she always had and ignore that feeling that had edged its way in. He saw her like Legolas did anyway which would make matters easier.

Her inner turmoil was abruptly halted when Arwen opened the door to her room like she always did when they were together. Arwen had a tendency to use her as a barbie doll when Buffy would let her and today would prove no different.

"Its time to rise. Your bath is waiting."

Rolling out of bed Buffy complied with Arwen's highly disguised orders. The elleth was the only person who could order Buffy around without some form of resistance.

Stripping down and settling in the warm water Buffy didn't waste time and began to wash her hair and body. Arwen had vast amounts of patience but when it came to the morning routine she set with Buffy there was little room for a leisurely pace until after Buffy had had her bath.

After rinsing off one final time Buffy got out of the bath. Drying quickly she made her way into her bedroom to find her bed made as usual and Arwen holding out another pale silver under dress for her to put on.

After several moments of adjustment and one blue and silver dress later Buffy obediently went over to the dressing table to allow Arwen to begin her favorite pastime.

Arwen spent nearly an hour brushing her hair dry and braiding back the hair from the crown of her forehead. Long strands left were left in front of Buffy's ears in the elven manner and after several moments of apparent debate Arwen chose a circlet of mithril for Buffy to wear.

It was not as simple as the one Arwen wore but that was to be expected. Here Buffy was almost a princess and as such she was expected to play a part.

Like every other circlet Buffy had been given over the years this one was beautiful. Though it bore no stones it was still more beautiful than anything Buffy had ever owned in Sunnydale. Shaped in a simple V in the front it stopped just below Buffy's hairline. It was delicate and simple; resembling vines as it went around her head. There were no chains either. To both her naneth and Arwen this was a circlet to be worn on a regular day; to Buffy it still felt like extravagance.

Knowing that it was time to face the world outside the comforting barrier of family to hide behind Buffy sighed and stood.

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"The heart has its reasons which reason does not understand."
- Blaise Pascal

Aragorn hadn't seen Buffy since he had put her in bed. It was now a day and a half later and he suspected she was avoiding him. He wasn't quite sure why but it bothered him. He and Buffy had come a great distance from the suspicion and aggression that they had felt in the White City and after banding together against Legolas they had become friends even. But since seeing her as well...a lady he couldn't keep his thoughts from her.

She was beautiful. She was open. She was like nothing he had ever seen before. And after sitting with her playing drinking games he had gotten so lost in her eyes that he had felt himself drowning. Her eyes had haunted him for years; now though they seemed to consume him.

He knew that his feelings for the tiny warrior were changing. In the years since leaving his adar's home many women had made their desire for him known and yet he had never felt anything for any of them. But Buffy, she awoke something in him beyond mere lust; she awoke something that if he let it free could be all consuming.

His musings were interrupted though by soft laughter that he would know anywhere. Not moving from his place in the large library he watched as Buffy and Arwen passed the threshold together. Neither seemed to notice him seated in one corner of the large room. The two were sharp contrasts to one another. Arwen in black and red; Buffy in blue and silver with yet another circlet on her brow.

"You threw food at him?" Arwen asked as she made her way to one of the shelves.

"He said that I didn't have the nerve." Buffy commented as she made her way to another shelf

"But you threw food at the King of Mirkwood." Arwen countered as she searched the titles.

"Yeah and? " Buffy asked as she bent low to look at a book for a moment and then stood up. Looking at Arwen's incredulous expression she replied.

"What? He dared me and you should have seen his face. It was priceless. He just sat there for a minute and then all of a sudden he was tossing bread at my head and laughing. It turned into a all out food fight."

"I still cannot imagine Thranduil behaving in such a way. He has quite the temper." Arwen commented as she turned back to the shelf.

"Well yeah he does but he's also got a great sense of humor. He a good guy. Little Watcher-ey sometimes but definitely of the fun. He pouts like Dawn used to when we wouldn't let her go patrolling with us because he can't go out hunting for orcs. Its kind of cute to see a grown man pout. For a while I thought only the gwenyn did it." Buffy said as she pulled a book from the shelf and flipped it open

"My brothers are most unusual." Arwen commented dryly as she went to the next shelf

"Now THAT's an understatement. If I didn't know better I'd think they were only kids instead of adults sometimes." Buffy retorted as she closed the book and replaced it on the shelf.

"You are as bad as they are pen vell."

"Oh what and you aren't? You are just as bad as we are. You just don't get caught as often. Don't think I don't know that you were the one who pulled that little prank with all of Erestor's clothes. I got blamed for that you know." Buffy retorted hands on hips.

"And how do you know it was me?" Arwen asked her back to the tiny slayer

"Because I didn't do it and the gwenyn don't have that much patience. Even for a prank like that."

"Then why not tell ada and then he wouldn't have punished you?" Arwen asked her back still to the slayer as she hunted

"Because you keep me from getting into trouble more than you ever cause me to get into it. Besides protecting each other is what we do; otherwise the gwenyn would blame us for everything. And I don't even want to think what is going to happen if Aragorn ever goes home while we're both there. Those three will probably get me into so much trouble that Elrond will make me work for Erestor again." Buffy replied her search apparently forgotten

"Is Estel really that bad?" Arwen queried as she picked out the book she evidently wanted.

"Just be grateful that he doesn't have a twin." Buffy deadpanned.

Aragorn's undignified snort from the corner caused two heads to turn suddenly in his direction. Both looked slightly embarrassed for a moment before other emotions become evident.

"Ya know eavesdropping is rude Aragorn even if you are in the room first." Buffy commented. Her irritation apparent.

"My apologizes. The conversation however was far too enlightening to interrupt." he drawled with a smirk. He was fond of irritated Buffy; well most of the time. His gaze flickered over to Arwen to find her studying the two of them intently.

"I bet it was." Buffy commented as Arwen turned to leave the room.

"Where are you going?" Buffy asked

"I have found my book. Now you must find the one you came in search of. Perhaps Estel can help. He would find the stories as interesting as I have I daresay." Arwen said as she went through he door without a backwards glance. Her hint none too subtle. She had basically told him to help Buffy find the book and then to show interest in it. She was much more subtle than Elrond the gwenyn had said but her orders were not to be disobeyed and considering what he was beginning to feel for Buffy her hint was more than welcome.

"What book are you looking for?" he asked. Buffy was rarely one to read so this seemed slightly out of the ordinary.

Looking at him for a moment blankly she replied. "Oh huh? Oh yeah book. Its something my ada wrote for me. A book of tales from where I came from. I told them to him years ago and he wrote them down and made a book of them. I wanted to read it."

"What is the name of the book?" he asked intrigued. He wanted to see this book. If these were stories of Buffy or from where she came from they would be most interesting since she didn't talk about her past often. Now all he had to do was play the part.

"Fairy Tales of Earth." Buffy replied as she began to search again.

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I can't be losing sleep
over this, no I can't
and now I cannot stop pacing
give me a few hours
I'll have this all sorted out
if my mind would just stop racing
cause I cannot stand still
I can't be this unsturdy
this cannot be happening

this is over my head
but underneath my feet
cause by tomorrow morning
I'll have this thing beat
and everything will be back to the way that it was
I wish that it was just that easy

cause I'm waiting for tonight
and then waiting for tomorrow
and I'm somewhere in between
what is real and just a dream
what is real and just a dream
what is real and just a dream
Somewhere In Between-Lifehouse

Caras Galadhon Lothlorien May 17/ 50 Tuile 2976 III Age

The last thirteen days had proven to Buffy that Arwen was in fact evil no matter how sweet she seemed. She had all but ordered her to indulge Aragorn in his obvious interest in the book of fairy tales. Something which was forcing them to be in far too much contact for her comfort at the moment.

Buffy couldn't get out of it either. While at her parents she normally spent her time patrolling with Haldir but this time she couldn't because they had guests.

Her guests.

Which meant hostess duty.

Which meant keeping Legolas and Aragorn happy.

Which really went against the whole 'avoid' thing/

And making Arwen angry was just bad for her general well being.

Which left her in a situation that was definitely of the bad. In the mornings the four of them would go riding and later they would disband. Arwen and Legolas would conveniently leave her with Aragorn for a couple of hours to read the book out loud and for him to ask her questions. It was taking them days to go over even one story because he asked so many questions. Spending time alone with Aragorn in the garden wasn't horrible but it was definitely putting a strain on her. He was pleasant and his usual self for the most part but there was a tension now. And she didn't know what to do about it all.

Yeah Aragorn was attractive and kind and funny and strong and not a vampire and not intimidated by her but she still wasn't sure that it was the time. If it would ever be the time. And if she did her job then he would be a king. A thought that scared her to no end.

The other thing that was weighing on her were her dreams. She'd had two more dreams since that first night and every time she could feel something coming.

Something powerful.

And it scared the hell out of her.

Which is why she's been pacing her bedroom for the last half hour thinking and debating about Aragorn. Because she can feel it; the desire and the beginnings of something stronger.

And so the fight raged on.

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