Part 14

Pacey's POV

"We have to talk." Four little words that stopped me, making me turn around to face her eyes. She had a serious look; dark circles making her look pale, but decision was written all over her.

"About what?" I'm still trying to postpone. What does she have to tell me? That we can't ruin our friendship because of one stupid kiss? Or what scares me most: that she felt exactly like I felt after that kiss? I know her pretty well to know deep inside what's my answer. She rolls her eyes in typical Potter way before answering.

"Don't play dumb with me, Witter. You know exactly what we have to talk about. You're not running away on me this time."

Straight to the point. No doubt that she's not going to make this easy for me. I close my eyes, breathing deeply, images of her, mixed with Maggie's, making me bounce between guilty and hope.

"I wasn't planning on it, Jo." I whisper.

"It doesn't look so" she quips, staring me sadly.

"I need time, Joey, to process what happened." I start, but she stops me.

"Time? What do you have in mind? Another ten years?" Potter sarcasm kicking in.

"Why are you bringing this up, Joey?"

"Pacey Witter, stop dancing around. If you need to ask me that, you are dumber than I thought. We can't do this again"

"Kissing?" I catch her off guard with a single word, but her answer makes me wonder.

"No, ignoring things between us."

Before I could give her an answer, her pager started its annoying mission on interrupt us.

"I'm letting you off the hook now, Pacey, but this conversation is not over."

"Not in a thousand years it would be, Joey. But you are right, we have to talk." I surprised myself with my words.

She starts to walk back to the ER, but turns around and gives me a soft kiss, leaving me unable to utter a single word.

"You're not that dumb after all." She whispers, walking away from me. I'm paralyzed by fear as I watch her slender figure going inside the hospital. Damn, count on Joey Potter to turn my world upside down when I least expect it.

Joey's POV

I don't remember feeling better and worse at the same time in my whole life, maybe just when Pacey kissed me on Aunt Gwen's backyard all those years ago. That Witter guy seems to have this effect on me. I feel bad because of John, but I can't keep pretending that nothing happened. It's not fair to both of us. I know he loves me, but I can't love him the way he expects me, like I could never really love anyone, not after giving my heart to certain blue eyed boy that took it away with him. I blame Eddie for cheating on me with Audrey, but our marriage wouldn't have lasted anyway. Not when what I was looking for was a replacement for what I had lost. Some people can tell me that it's crazy, absurd to proclaim such kind of love for a teenage passion. Those people don't know Pacey Witter.

Somehow during these past years, unconsciously I waited for him. The day I saw him again, my heart knew that. Just my usual stubborn self didn't want to face reality. When he told me his history, I told to myself that it was compassion. Friendship. I couldn't dare say other.
Then he had to come and kiss me. How could I deny anymore what had been growing up inside of me these past months? All those feelings I had bottled were like champagne at New Year's. I'm not really good with analogies. Among with those, new feelings for the man he grew up to be, making me weak on my knees, scaring me. Fearing that I had hurt him so badly that friendship was all that we could have. But that kiss. It wasn't for sure a kiss from a friend; despite it had started like that.

I look to John across the table. I agreed to have dinner out, he planned this so carefully, and I was breaking inside. I know what I have to do. Even if Pacey doesn't feel this way. I start to freak out. Carter looks so happy. I can't do this tonight. Tomorrow I'll talk to Pacey then I'll do the dirty job. I stop my inner rambling when John takes my hand.

"Joey, I have something very important to ask you."

I stare at him quizzically, feeling like a dream when I see him taking the small box from his pocket.

"Will you marry me?"