Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto…or anything, pretty much.
A/N: Apparently that last one was toooo easy! Cookie for Blue Tygr, who got it perfectly right! Star Eyed Unicorn had basically the same answer, different words so you get a cookie too and Pay Back…have a glass of grape juice. #grins#
Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother
Chapter Five
Naruto yawned widely, watching the bastard pick his breakfast. He might leave a bit of chow out for him between meals but there was no way in hell Naruto was going to eat that crap all day.
"If I give you all the salmon Sakura's going to be pissed. If you're not going to eat that chow I need to go shopping." Sasuke muttered as he walked from the fridge holding the salmon slabs and plopped them down on the kitchen counter. "What the hell do you eat anyway?"
'Meat stupid. More rarer, more better.' Naruto made a point of hopping up onto one of the kitchen chairs so he could watch Sasuke at a higher level. 'Fruit too maybe. And I can lower myself to a mouse or two but…the other side of me reallly hates doing that.' The small face blanched.
Sasuke caught the look of disgust and took it for instruction. He paused in his walk to the oven and hefted the thin cut of salmon. "Don't cook it?"
Naruto nodded, his head to the side.
"Alright. That makes it easier for me." The slab was deposited in his bowl then and Naruto ignored Sasuke for the next ten minutes as he ate.
After licking his paws and grooming himself, Naruto turned his attention back to his objective. Sasuke-bastard was digging dispiritedly into a bowl of cereal, a plate of fruit discarded to the side of him. 'Mah but he looks dead in the mornings. He needs to do something…exciting!'
Right! He knew just what to do. Walking over to Sasuke chair he started sniffing around. Up and down his leg…under the table…He could feel Sasuke's movements stop to watch him. Naruto grinned to himself before jumping up onto the chair across from Sasuke.
"Seriously, get off the furniture. If Sakura comes down…"
Blah, blah. Pink-Alarm was just loud and bright. She wouldn't actually do anything to him much less dare touch him. Naruto's amusement must be on his face because Sasuke stopped as if realizing what he was saying.
"Yeah, yeah. She'd only point and scream. But I'd rather not have to listen to her screaming too much today." 'Well me too but…well, it's for your own good.'
And with that he jumped on the table, grabbed a large section of watermelon in his mouth and ran for it.
"The-FUCK! KITTEN!" 'Really had to get bastard to call him something else too.' Naruto tore into the den, and paused in a corner, shifting the fruit in his teeth. The juice was delicious and kind of distracting him. Sasuke had stalked in after him and only now watching him pause in the doorway, arms spread wide, Naruto realized how ridiculously funny…and sort of cute he looked. Sasuke had a displeased glare on his flushed face and his black hair was in a rat's nest of disarray. The large rumpled black T-shirt he had put on after waking was hanging on his slim frame and his gray sweatpants quite honestly were going to fall from their precarious balance on his hips if Sasuke didn't stop to pull the cinch on them.
Naruto's eyes flared with mirth as he watched Sasuke walk into the room, arms still spread wide and stooping as if he hoped to catch him in a hug. Itachi had never been this…stupid? No, that wasn't the word. Gullible? Well, that either. Amusing. Yeah, Itachi had never been so amusing.
Chomping into the watermelon one more time, Naruto made a muffled yelp and ran for it again. Sasuke's lunge caught air.
"KITTEN!!"
'Come on Sasuke-bastard! Let's run. I'm going to start you running!'
By the time he'd caught Kitten there was a trail of dismembered watermelon all over the first floor of the house. And he had a feeling Kitten had gotten bored with how slow he was as his 'capture' had actually happened right back at the kitchen table where Sasuke found him dropping the destroyed and almost clean rind back in the plate.
Sasuke dropped back into his chair heavily panting and threw an arm over his face. "Itachi sent you here to kill me."
The fox stopped licking his chops and gave him a look, similar to the 'You're stupid' look. He couldn't define it.
"I'm not out of shape by the way. You're just faster." The fox grinned then and looking haughtily away, started to groom his fluffy tail. "If I go to the store will you behave? Leave Saukra alone and watch TV or something?"
The fox tilted his head to the side and looked at Sasuke from the corner of his eye. Then gave a barely there nod. Sasuke assumed the hesitation was in the terms of contingency.
"If she bothers you first feel free." The fox gave him a strange look then, almost knowing before nodding again more firmly. "Good." Right. It wouldn't be so bad to have a smart animal in the house. For a few days of course. In fact he should try to call his brother today and see if he was home yet. After he got back.
"Here's some chow for while I'm gone." Sasuke had gotten up to fill the bowl. Water was there from yesterday but he changed it anyway. "Meat and fruit then?" Finally a nod and fanged grin. "And I'm not stupid."
With that, Sasuke headed for the stairs to get ready for the day.
A/N: After the next chapter is posted I would like to begin adding chapters together. So each 'chapter' will be roughly 2000 words instead of 1000. And some will get even closer to 3000 as sometimes I wrote like 1500+ a chapter. I was going to start doing it this chapter but something rather special happens in the next chapter so I needed it to stand alone. For impact.
Hmm, a riddle this time.
A plane carrying two FBI agents was flying over the Pacific. Suddenly it encountered engine trouble and crashed killing every, single, person, on board. Except the man and the woman sitting behind the FBI agents. Why?