Chapter edited on October 6th, 2008. AD. Not BC. A. D.

Everyone's heard of the Happy Thestrals, haven't you all? They're the wizarding world's newest band, and they play the best rock songs in the magic world!

There are four members of the Happy Thestrals. There's Felix, the drummer, Tristan, the keyboard player, John, the guitarist and backup singer, and Chris, the main singer. And Teen Witch has scored an interview with them!

Zara Catrine reporting.

Zara: So, you guys, are you all excited for your summer tour? Word has it even Celestina Warbeck, one of the most popular singing sorceresses, has bought tickets!

Felix: Of course we're excited. I mean, it's our career.

(Zara would like to note that Chris, Tristan, and John agree with Felix.)

Zara: That's great to know! Nothing makes people more excited than a person who actually likes his or her occupation. So what, in your opinion, is your best song?

Felix: "If I Were a Dark Lord With Rainbow-Colored Hair." It seems to be the most popular song out of all of them so far.

Chris: Yeah. In these dark times, with You-Know-Who alive again and everything, people need a bit of a laugh.

John: True. I prefer "The Ministry of Morons," though. They really are morons—I mean, they ignored You-Know-Who's return for a year.

Tristan: Yeah, they are. I like "Invisible Carriages and Horseless Wings." See, we're the Happy Thestrals, and the Hogwarts carriages are pulled by thestrals.

Zara: That's true. But how did you know?

Tristan: A Muggle murdered my aunt, who's also a Muggle, using a gun when I was staying at her house, when I was seven. My dad arrived before the Muggle could kill me and he Stunned the guy.

Zara: Wow… I'm sorry. And I don't mean to offend you or anything, but you don't seem too upset.

Tristan: I've learned to live with it.

Zara: That's good to know. So what inspired "If I Were a Dark Lord With Rainbow-Colored Hair?" And what do you think You-Know-Who would say if he heard that song?

John: Well, like Chris said, we thought that people needed a bit of laugh in these dark times. I know making a mockery of You-Know-Who would probably anger him if he heard it, but it's not like he knows where we live anyway. And seeing him in a humorous light may make the situation a bit better.

Chris: Yeah. We went to school together—we were all Gryffindors, along with this kid Charlie Weasley, and there was this Metamorphmagus in Ravenclaw who always morphed her hair into a rainbow of colors—pink, violet, green… really bright colors. So that was kind of where we got the inspiration.

Zara: Wow… that's cool! There's a Metamorphmagus working as an Auror at the Ministry now. Her name's… well, I'll just say that her initials are N.T. Is that her?

Felix: Yeah, I think so.

Zara: Cool. And John, you just said that You-Know-Who doesn't know where you live… but you know he can track anyone down, right?

John: Yeah. It's not like I'm worried, though. Got to make the best of your life before it's over, don't you think?

Zara: That's one way of putting it. You're a bit… pessimistic. No offense meant.

Felix: Nah, he's just realistic. And optimistic… he doesn't even seem scared at the prospect of dying.

Zara: Are the rest of you?

Tristan: Er… kinda. But we try to think about more cheerful things.

Zara: Good point. Let's see… do any of you have love lives that you'd like to share with our teenage witch readers?

Tristan: … Nah.

Chris: Neither do I. But I'd like a girlfriend.

Felix: I don't have one. Nor do I want one… I'm really busy right, writing new songs and touring and the like.

John: Ignore him. Felix is like that… kinda a workaholic.

Felix: I am not!

Zara: OK, OK, subject change. Since none of you seem to have girlfriends—

John: I do. I just didn't answer the question yet.

Zara: Oh, you do! Who is she? I'm sure everyone would love to know.

John: … Nah. I'd like to keep my personal life a secret.

Zara: (sighing) Well, all right. If you're sure.

John: I'm sure.

Zara: OK then. So, what would the rest of you—Felix, Chris, and Tristan—look for in a girlfriend?

Felix: Nice. Kind. Caring. Not too needy.

Chris: Same, I suppose. But Felix, "nice" and "kind" mean the same thing.

Felix: Exactly. Same thing.

Chris: Whatever.

Tristan: Cool. Good-looking. And doesn't mind about my career. And isn't using me just because I'm famous.

Zara: Those are all good qualities of a girlfriend. Well, I'm afraid our time for interviewing is up, but it was a pleasant interview nonetheless. I enjoyed speaking with all of you.

Felix: Was that rehearsed?

John: Felix, shut up. You're being rude.

Felix: Oh. Right. Sorry.

Track One of The Happy Thestrals' New Album "Invisible Carriages and Horseless Wings": Silencio

Do I need to say good-bye

Do I need to start talking

Do I need to say anything

No, no, I don't think so

I don't want to say a word

I want to keep quiet

I want to be silenced

Like the Silencing Charm

As in…

Silencio

Silencio

Please keep quiet

Don't say a word

Silencio

Silencio

I don't want to hear anything

Repeat Chorus 2x

Do I really need to start talking

No, no, no, I don't think so

No way

Words wouldn't be enough to express this feeling

So please just leave me alone

Let me rest by myself

Without saying a word

Like with a Silencing Charm on

Like…

Silencio

Repeat Chorus 2x

Silencio

No, no, I don't think so

Silencio

Repeat Chorus 2x

Sorry if that song was sucky. I'm not a good songwriter.

Please review!

-xAndromedaBlackx-