Disclaimer: Don't own them!
Chapter 6: Anticipated realization.
Through the auburn and white hair that partially covered her eyes, she saw him and stayed quiet like this for a while: just staring at him, feeling his presence, pretending she was still sleeping. The sheets and pillow felt warm, and though she couldn't see herself because she was lying on her stomach, she knew her back was completely uncovered; it felt good this way.
He was getting dressed, and before he put his shirt on, she could observe every single muscle on his perfect torso; could there possibly be a better first thing to watch when she woke up in the morning?
Yes, this is exactly how she felt: just happy to be there, with no second thoughts or hesitations. She thought there must have been something wrong with her, because no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't feel bad about this anymore.
Was it wrong? Maybe, but to who, anyway?
Would she regret it later on? Perhaps, but definitely not today.
Would it finish soon? Probably, and that's exactly why she wanted to live every second of it as intensely as possible. She'd live the present, instead of constantly worrying about the future and repeatedly checking on the past over her shoulder.
She'd enjoy it, as good as it was and as long as it lasted.
"Bon jour, chere" he finally said, combing his hair back with his fingers. He had his clothes on now.
"Mornin', sugah" she moaned, stretching a little.
"Ah, I like dat" he grinned, sitting on the bed, next to her. " Were y' savin' it for de good byes t' our first date?"
As an answer she just turned around, leaving her breasts exposed, and feeling so utterly free this way. Remy didn't miss this action, of course, and as he kissed softly that exact spot in the middle of her chest, she closed her eyes wondering how in the world she had survived her whole life without this. Then, he came up her neck, until their eyes met again:
"See y' t'night?" he said, gently caressing her face.
Rogue nodded, they kissed, and as he left the room, she realized this would be one hell of a long day.
(…)
"STRIPES!" Logan's angry snarl resounded in the Danger Room: "Bring your lazy butt here right now".
She obeyed reluctantly, praying for the shower she took was efficient enough to remove any suspicious smell from her.
"What?" she sighed, standing in front of the Canadian, her arms crossed over her chest.
He narrowed his eyes and spoke: "Is there any particular reason for you to be yawning like a little wimp, and dragging yourself across the room instead of running, in the middle of a training session?"
"Ah'm not draggin'…!"
"Just answer the question."
There were a lot of things that pissed Logan off, but there was one in particular that almost turned him into an ogre: people who didn't take training seriously.
"Ah didn't sleep well last night. That's all" she replied.
"Well you better DO sleep well tonight, if you know what's good for you and the rest of the team. Now get back there."
She joined the rest of the students again; they all were forming an attentive circle around Cyclops, who was explaining some defensive tactics or whatever. It was hard for Rogue to pay attention though, since Remy was right by her side.
"So, tell me" he whispered, almost without moving his lips. "What were y' doin' last night dat's causin' y' dis very reprehensible laziness?"
She bit her lips not to laugh, and always looking towards the front, she muttered: "Go mind your own business, Swamp Rat."
He chuckled almost inaudibly.
"All right everybody" Scott sentenced: "The program's about to start; to your positions."
(…)
Days started to go by, and it's fair to say Rogue was having the time of her life. It was always a little nerve wracking to think they were always in jeopardize of getting caught up, but the truth is that it added some extra excitement. But there was more than that, of course.
Depending on, who knows, the specific way the sun hit on the earth each day, she woke up thinking different things every time: one day, wondering if she'd ever want something serious with someone like him; the next, wondering if he'd ever want something serious with anybody; and later, being just happy with her life. All of these things were resumed in a single one: she was starting to feel way too many things for him. And how could she not? She had it clear this was something casual; Remy just wasn't the one woman type of guy, and she knew it since the very beginning. She had accepted their relationship this way, not like he directly asked her about it; it was more like an unspoken agreement.
And how would she feel when, one day, he just walked away?
No, it was better not to think about it; not yet.
It was better to keep living the moment.
To keep participating in standard conversations with everyone at dinner, while under the table she caressed his leg with her foot. This pretty much drove him nuts, so much, he easily lost track of any conversation he could be having at the moment. Rogue always managed to look interested on whatever Jean or kitty had to say, while he went through the agony of feeling her toes between his legs.
"Y' think dat's fair t' Remy, chere?" he mock protested one day: "Y' caught me outta guard t'day an' I almost made de fork explode."
"Well, take it as a warm up, Sugah" she laughed.
"Warm up t' what?"
"Aw, someone who didn't know yah any better would buy that innocent look 'n your face" she remarked. "But luckily, Ah do. An' yah know what? Ah've got a little somethin' for yah t'day."
She pushed him sit on his bed, staying standing right in front of him; they had started to use his bedroom too.
"Ah, really?" he raised a brow, caressing the back of her knees with both of his hands.
"Yep." Next, she slowly untied the ribbon around her waist and let the robe slide down to the floor: "Yah like it?"
According to his growing wicked smirk (which wasn't the only growing part of his body, at this point): yes, he might have liked it a lot: she was wearing this minuscule black outfit that left pretty much nothing to imagination.
"If I like it, cherie?" he said, his thumbs now resting in both of the little bones of her hips: "Oui, but… I'm afraid I need t' see it off right away."
(...)
They went out for coffee once, at three am; sure it was an unusual hour for it, but hey, the night was their favourite time.
"When y' gonna tell 'em, chere?"
"Tell 'em what?"
"'Bout yer power."
Rogue sighed and took a look around. They'd decided to go on foot and they were now walking down a pretty houses area; a few more minutes, and they'd be back at the mansion.
"Ah don't know, Ah don't wanna have to explain how it happened. B'sides…"
"'Sides?" he encouraged her to continue.
"Ah know they're like mah family an' everythin', but… Ah'd just wish Ah could trust them more."
"Y' don't?"
"Not for everythin', Ah mean, they're mah friends but they're so distant sometimes, yah know?" he nodded, both of his hands hidden in the pockets of his trench coat, because it was getting breezy. "They live in their perfect little world an'… well, not all of them; Logan's different but he's so… distant too. Ah guess he probably thinks 'bout us same Ah think 'bout 'em."
"But hey, y've got people lookin' after y'" he said. "Moi, I almost got no people at all."
"An' your family?"
"Dey're somethin' special, indeed" he chuckled with a hint of irony: "Dey're not really my family, chere: y' could call it adoption."
"Really…? That sorta makes two of us, then."
She had never imagined it, but somehow it seemed fitting.
"Père… he can get t' be a real pain 'n de ass" he continued: "When he comes up with an idea, dere's no way t' talk t' him out of it. My broder just lives his own life. An' I've learnt t' do de same."
They walked a few steps in silence, and suddenly a chilling breeze hit them in their faces.
"Gawd!" she rubbed her bare hands in order to warm them up a little.
And he put his arm around her shoulders, bringing her closer:
"Guess we're lucky t' have each other here" he concluded, as they kept walking.
This might seem no big deal for two people that have already slept together. But yet, it actually was something special: it was a caring, honest, almost non-physical hug.
(…)
During those three weeks, there wasn't one night they didn't spend together. Many times she wondered if this was what she wanted to do with her life: to have something going on with someone, not really knowing if they were fuck-buddies, special friends, if they were more like dating, or what. It could get really confusing sometimes; especially when she realized Remy occupied every corner of her life now. She didn't even want to build the sentence in her mind, but she knew that maybe… maybe she was in love with that stupid Cajun.
"Remy?"
"Oui?"
They were in her bathtub, soapy water covering their embraced bodies.
"Just wanted to tell yah that…" she didn't want to sound desperate, she didn't want him to feel pity for the silly gal that obviously had this huge crush on him. She didn't want to… "That Ah feel so good bein' with yah."
With his arms around her, he squeezed her tighter and simply said: "Me too."
He wanted to say more, like he had lived a lot of things, but never felt this way; that he loved not only her beauty, but also the way she faced life, with audacity and some unique innocence at the same time. That he had never met a woman that could eat two gigantic hot dogs in ten minutes, walk under the rain without worrying about her hair, and not judge him about his past. He wanted to say he loved every word and kiss that came out of her mouth.
But he said nothing else. Those were just too pretty words for a man who didn't believe love existed.
(…)
They didn't see each other too much the day after the bathtub: there was no danger room session, Rogue had to go out with the girls to buy some stuff, Scott sat in front of her at dinner, so there'd certainly be no under the table fun tonight. Not like the first time it happened, though, so she was cool about it; they'd make it up later, when everyone was sleeping.
They were supposed to meet in her bedroom, but she decided to give him a little surprise; so she sneaked out of hers, with the usual tingly feeling inside, and the same shorts she was wearing the first time their skins came together, at the garage.
As quietly as she could, she pushed the door open a couple of inches; and then she heard his voice, coming from the balcony:
"Bon soir? Christy? How y' doin', chere?... Ah, but y' always loved Remy's accent, didn't y'?... I'm 'n New York now, an' I thought mebbe we could meet, an' who knows?: Discuss some interestin' matters?... Yer place?... Oui, I know where it is… See y' dere 'n a half hour, den?... Bien… au revoir, cherie."
In the back of her mind, Rogue always knew this would happen; not like knowing it, made this less painful.
"Idiot" she called herself, with a lump in her throat, and came back to her bedroom.
Sometimes she forgot she was nothing but another piece of ass to him.
Note: While I was writing Remy's conversation on the phone, I couldn't help to curse him about a dozen times! Btw, at the beginning of chap 5, there was a little paragraph that appeared there out of nowhere! I swear I revise the chap once it's done, but it just popped up there. The thing is that I had started writing that little part and then I moved it, but it decided to appear there anyway; sorry 'bout that! (glares evilly at Microsoft Word). There was a little quotation there, with the "There's people looking after you" Remy said; it's from the final part of Cajun Spice; is that how it goes? I think so. You probably know it already, but I had to say it.
So, who's gonna be the lucky reviewer to drop me review number 100?? We've got 99 right now! Yay! Thanks so much for it, reviews are so important to me, because when you write, you're pretty much pouring your soul into the text, so it's kinda scary sometimes to think "what's people gonna think about this?" I always love to read everything you guys have to say.
Next chap: we go a little into Remy's mind, to know why the hell he is doing this. And what's Rogue gonna do about it?