EPISODE 5: THE LAND OF THE CHOCOBOS
PART II
Yuki: O.k. we're back! Here's a recap!
Cloud: I was made the virgin goddess of pregnancy. The chocobos have captured the author and Leon.
Leon: The chocobos want me to get Cloud pregnant; because they think he's a girl. Yuki needs to get to a computer so she can end the madness that she didn't cause for once.
Yuki: Leon also came up with a plan at the end of the first episode. Let's see if we escape with our lives and Cloud's virginity intact!
Cloud: Hey!
Disclaimer: It' called a fanfiction so that would mean…..correct the people and actual game don't belong to me.
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(American Idiot playing)
Leon: I've got it.
Yuki: What is it?
Cloud: Better be a good one.
Leon: O.k. when the chocobos leave m and Cloud in a room together so we could you know. Me and Cloud sneak out the back come get you and get to that giant deserted office building over there. Most likely there's a computer in there that works.
Yuki: I like that plan.
Cloud: Same here.
(Chocobo walks over and opens cage forcing Leon to follow. Another chocobo goes and leads Cloud in the same direction.)
Yuki: Don't get side tracked!
Cloud: We're ditching her aren't we?
Leon: Yep.
(Chocobos lock Cloud and Leon in a very well furnished room. There are glasses of wine on the table.)
Cloud: God I'm thirsty! (starts drinking)
Leon: Just a little to quench our thirst then we go. (drinks)
(What Cloud and Leon don't know is that the chocobos have learned to make ecstasy and put it in the wine.)
Cloud: Leon did it suddenly get hot in here?
Leon: Yeah, let's go before they come back.
Cloud: Wow Leon your hot!
Leon: No….your hot.
Cloud: Want to do it?
Leon: What the hell.
(They start going at it. They go all the way! They wake up an hour later.)
Leon: Cloud? God my head. What happened?
Cloud: I don't know. I do know however that we are naked in bed together and my butt and spine are sore.
Leon: You don't think we?
Cloud: No we couldn't have.
Leon: Sam here. Let's get dressed and go.
(They got dressed and headed toward the building. When they went in they saw that inside looked new still.)
Cloud: There might be a phone that works in one of the offices.
Leon: Yeah. Let's go to the top floor so it will take the chocobos longer to get to us.
Cloud: K.
(They climb all thirty stories and finally got to what they guessed used to be the head honcho's office.)
Leon: this is it let's go.
(They went in. What they saw nearly killed them. There was the author in the head honcho's chair playing poker with some chocobos and the chocobo chief.)
Yuki: What do you mean I'm cheating?
Chief: Wark wark wark wark.
Yuki: I honestly have no idea what your talking about.
Both: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!
Yuki: Oh, hey boys. Just enjoying a friendly game of poker with my little buddies here. (grin)
Cloud: But how did…..when did…what?
Leon: What are you doing playing poker with the chocobos that captured us?!
Yuki: Oh, that.
Leon: Yes that you dumb ass.
Yuki: Well boys, meet my friend Vincent, I named after the Vincent you know, He is the chocobo chief.
Vincent: Wark. (Waves at Cloud and Leon)
Yuki: Anyway, I was extremely bored after the third episode so me and my little buddy came up with an idea. We would capture you and Cloud and knock the both of you out. I would be imprisoned with you to make it look like I was innocent. When they sent you and Cloud away I got out and came here.
Leon: Wait then how did the story go on?
Yuki: Wireless internet on my cell. (Holds up the little device.)
Cloud: Wait what happened when we experienced that tome laps.
Yuki: (maniacal grin) We'll little chocobo let's turn to the screen.
(A screen came down showing Cloud and Leon experiencing sexual intercourse. Cloud playing the role of uke.)
Yuki: There's your answer. That is extremely hot and shmexy by the way. I'll add it to my yaoi movie collection.
Cloud: But how-
Yuki: My little chocobo buddies have successfully made ecstasy. They put it in your wine. They did it because they know I love yaoi and gave it to me as a very early birthday present.
Leon: You little bitch! I'm going to kill you!
(Makes a lunge for Yuki. Bryan and Corey suddenly appear and tackle Leon.)
Leon: Damn it!
Cloud: What you're telling me is that I lost my virginity to him! (Points at Leon. Cloud is angry.)
Yuki: For once the Leon and Cloud sex isn't me. All though when you two star in another one of my stories you rather enjoy it.
Leon: No duh! You make us like it!
Yuki: No I don't. I make you realize your feelings for each other.
Cloud: Same difference. But still Leon? Why do I have to lose it to Leon?
Yuki: Because I'm the author and I say so.
Cloud: I need a shower.
Leon: Same here.
Yuki: Yes! Yaoi in the shower! Grab the camera!
Cloud: We are not bathing together!
Leon: even if we were we wouldn't let you watch.
Yuki: Now hat's just rude Leon. After my chocobos helped you finally make Cloud yours.
Leon: When have I ever wanted him?
Cloud: You don't like me Leon? (watery eyed)
Yuki: Leon you big mouth you made Cloud cry again!
(Leon looks heavenward.)
Leon: Why? Why do all of you gods hate me?! Do you dislike me this much.
Yuki: Leon it's not a god that hates you. It's Karma! In which I'm a Capricorn, whose ruling planet is Saturn, in which Saturn is sometimes referred to as Karma.
Leon: So you're basically a descendent of Karma.
Yuki: Yep.
Leon: Damn you Saturn! And another thing why can cloud say he doesn't like me but I can't say I don't like him?
Yuki: Because Cloud is more sensitive. You should know this by now Squall.
Leon: It's LEON!
Yuki: If you say so. Bryan Corey you can go now.
(Corey and Bryan salute to Yuki and disappear in a puff of smoke.)
Leon: You should have made them stay.
Yuki: Why?
Cloud: Because we get to kill you now.
Yuki: Not today! (Disappears in puff of smoke.)
Both: Damn you!
(Anime/Manga nerd land)
Yuki: Now that I'm done toying with them in this episode I have a couple new ideas. Heh heh Cloud Leon prepare to be freaked out.
End……..Just kidding!
Dun dun dun!