A/N: I'm so sorry it has been 2 weeks since I updated this story. In all honesty I was just feeling a little lazy, so thank you Dr Hooker for your review today kicking me in the butt to update. So I have worked on a new chapter all afternoon so I hope you will be happy with it.

As always thanks to everyone who is still reading this story and your reviews make my day.

Chapter 9 – Epiphany

The weeks passed by and Addison successfully managed to avoid being alone with Alex. Alex wasn't an idiot and knew it was a calculated move on her behalf. He wasn't losing faith though he would wait.

Everything all seemed to come toppling down on Addison on Monday. It started out an ordinary Monday nothing out of the normal. She met Derek for lunch in the cafeteria. She watched him with a young Intern he had been spending quite a bit of time with. Addison even teased him about the fact that this Intern Dr Grey had quite a crush on Derek.

There was something in the way he was looking at Meredith today that made Addison look a little more carefully. He has never looked at me like that before. She shrugged it off, Addison was not a jealous person and she had no reason to start now.

Later that day Addison realised that she does in fact possess a jealous streak. She stood by the NICU and watched from just inside the door as Alex and the new Ped's nurse stood close to each other. A little too close Addison thought. Neither Alex nor the nurse noticed Addison and she listened okay eavesdropped on their conversation.

"You know Dr Karev I don't really know anyone here. I was wondering if you would maybe take pity on me and join me for a drink tonight." The nurse said with a definite flirty tone to her voice.

"I think I could manage that." Alex said returning his trademark smirk along with his own flirty tone.

It was just then that Addison was noticed.

"Oh Dr Shepherd I have done the final checks on the new borns." The nurse stated.

"Well I'm not your boss you don't need to explain anything to me. Excuse me I didn't mean to interrupt anything." Addison said rather sarcastically before she made eye contact with Alex and left the room.

"Excuse me Sarah I'll catch up with you later." Alex said as he followed Addison out of the NICU.

"Addison, Addison" He repeated as she kept walking. When he caught up with her he grabbed her by the arm. "What is your problem?" He asked.

"I don't have a problem Alex but it would appear you do. It's called professionalism. Clearly you lack it. Why would you hurt your reputation as a great surgeon for a fling with yet another nurse? No-one will respect you for that."

"Oh this has nothing to do with my reputation and everything to do with US. You want to talk about professionalism. Well what about the fact that a married attending is making out in her office with another attending and not the one who is her husband." Alex replied.

"Will you lower your voice?" Addison asked.

He pulled her into the closest storage closet. "What is it you expect me to do Addison? Come on tell me I will be really interested in this."

"I...I don't know." She finished quietly.

"Well figure it out. You know how I feel. You know I want you, I may not have said it but I'm STILL in love with you and I will not be saying it again until you can say it back to me."

"You love me?" Addison said in almost a whisper.

"You know I do and you know you feel the same about me. So when you want to stop playing games and be honest with your husband let me know. In the mean time, I'm not a monk if I want to go out and sleep with other women I will. Think about that. Think about how jealous you feel at just me flirting with someone else. Times that by about 100 and you will get close to how I feel every time I look at Derek."

"God Alex I just don't know what to do."

"Yes you do. I will wait for you. But baby you have to figure it out soon. The longer you leave it the harder it is going to be, for everyone involved." Alex finished with a much softer tone in his voice before leaving the storage cupboard.

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Addison needed to talk to someone. She paged Callie and Miranda and asked them if they could drop by her office at the end of the day.

"So what's the latest?" Callie asked straight to the point.

"I have had the weirdest day. I mean I have had an Epiphany."

"An Epiphany right yeah do you want to elaborate on that."

"Okay I'll start with lunch. Derek and I managed to coordinate our lunch breaks and I was sitting at the table waiting for him. He was discussing something with Meredith Grey. Do you know her she is an Intern?"

"Sure she is one of mine." Miranda supplied.

"Oh right. Well I've teased Derek for a while now about how she just gazes at him adoringly. I've always thought it was really cute. Yeah I know I'm a strange wife. Anyway today the way he was looking at her made me think the adoration isn't just a one-way street. I mean I can honestly say Derek has NEVER looked at me the way he was looking at her."

"Oh Addison. Um I'm sorry. I don't know what to say." Callie offered.

"No. No. Its okay that's the point I'm about to get at. I felt nothing. I wasn't jealous at all. I mean weirdly enough I was happy for him. See Derek and I have been best friends for god 20 years now and I want him to be happy. There is a little part of me that forgets that we should have more in our marriage than what we do. Look don't get me wrong, I love Derek I really do, but just not in the way a wife should love her husband."

"Wow. That's quite an epiphany." Miranda said.

"Well it gets better. I saw Alex today flirting with a new Ped's nurse. I have honestly never felt jealousy before. But when I saw her batting her eyelashes and touching his arm, I just had these intense feelings of anger. When he was responding to her and agreed to a date I saw red or should I say green. I was so green with jealousy I didn't know what to do."

"Did they see you?" Callie asked.

"Oh yes. I was so rude. I have never behaved like that before. Really all it did was feed Alex's already inflated ego. He followed me out of the room, took me into a storage room and basically told me I had no right to be jealous which is so true. He told me he would wait but he wasn't going to stop his life until I made up my mind. I have a decision to make and I should make it soon. Oh and he told me he loved me."

"Whoa. Wait. Alex Karev told you he loved you?"

"Yes he did." Addison said smiling. "He loves me."

"Okay Earth to Addison." Miranda said.

"Mmm Yeah I'm here. It just.. you don't know how long I have longed to hear those words from him. 15 years to be precise."

"Addison, I hate to rain on your parade but what about Derek. That is not a small obstacle."

"Yes I realise that I guess I will have to talk to him and soon. I know Alex is my destiny."

"Destiny. Jesus Addison snaps out of it. I'm happy you realise Alex is the love of your life but come on destiny. It's not a soap opera." Miranda said ever the realist.

"No I think it's so romantic. Being separated for all those years because of a string of incidents that shouldn't have happened and now after 15 years they find each other. I think its destiny Addison even if Miranda doesn't."

"Thanks Callie. I just have to work up the courage to talk to Derek."

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It was now the end of the day and as if the hands of fate couldn't deal them any more cards Addison and Alex found themselves in the elevator finishing for the day.

"So you are going out for drinks?" Addison asked.

"No. Someone changed my mind." He said smiling at her.

"Oh." Addison said trying not to smile.

They exited the elevator and made their way out to the car park.

"It's not that cold Addison" Alex laughed as he watched her wrap a soft woollen scarf around her neck.

"I hate the cold" She said with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Come on let me walk you to your car."

They walked in comfortable silence. It felt weird they had gotten along so well and now with all the mis truths they had lived with for so long now being sorted out, things were now feeling different. Very different. Having Alex tell her he loved her, changed a lot of things. It was out there now, never to be able to be taken back.

Once they reached the car Alex put his hands up and held her scarf on both sides of her neck, wrapping it a little tighter as the wind had picked up. They stood like that for a few minutes, neither saying a word. He looked into her eyes, and glanced at her lips. Addison reached up and touched the side of his face that now had that sexy 3 day growth that she had always found very appealing.

Still neither one of them said a word, reality was now suspended as he kept glancing at her lips, finally with a slight nod of Addison's head they both leant in. Slowly and tentatively his lips brushed across her. In no time Alex had let go of her scarf placed one hand behind her back, the other around her waist and began to deepen the kiss.

Addison's hand moved from his face to around his neck to pull him as close to her as possible, she wanted to feel his well muscled chest against hers even if it was through their many layers of clothes. As their tongues now duelled for dominance, Addison began to moan involuntarily at the sensations Alex was creating. It was like the last 15 years had melted away and they were back to square one.

They pulled away and Alex moved to her neck and began to kiss and suck and lick her neck, all she could do was moan. How she had missed his touch. It was nothing short of sublime.

"Come home with me Addie." Alex murmured into her ear.

"No-one has called me Addie for years. I always loved how you said it." She smiled.

"Come home with me." He said again as he continued to kiss her neck, jaw and ear lobe.

"Oh God." She moaned as he continued on her neck as his hands began running down her sides. Her hands had moved underneath his jacket and she could feel his toned back and shoulders.

"I know it's complicated." He murmured in between kisses. "But all I care about is you...me...and right now." He said huskily as he continued to arouse her.

"Alex I can't I just can't. I shouldn't have done this. It's not fair to you. I have to sort some things out."

"I know you have to talk to Derek. But Addie there is something here, between us. It hasn't gone away it's real. I know you feel it too."

"Yes I admit there is something between us. Something I have never felt with anyone else. Derek has been so good to me; I could never betray him like that. I have to go. I can't be with you until I have spoken to Derek. I promise I will. Trust me. Can you give me a little more time?"

"Then you are saying you want to be with me?" Alex said not daring to hope all his dreams were about to come true.

"Yes Alex I am." She said smiling. "It's always been you."

"Okay. I can wait. Baby please talk to him soon so we can start our life together."

"I will." Addison said before she quickly brushed her lips over his.

A/N: okay so there you go. I hope you enjoyed this update. Please be kind and review. They are always really appreciated.