Author's notes: Yay! Another update! Funnily enough, I wrote this based on the quote below. I love Mitch Hedburg. He was one of those great comedians who were taken too early. He had the potential to go so far. I really enjoy his random, silly observational jokes. You don't have to be high to understand his comedic genius! And we lost George Carlin not long ago too. I loved his rants on the 'Seven dirty words' and 'stuff'. "Have you ever noticed how everyone else's stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?" Ha ha! Genius play on words. Love it. The world is a darker place with both of them gone. And now a few words of wisdom: Don't eat with your mouth full. That is all.

Sports

"Y'know, people think I'm into sports just because I'm a man.

I not into sports—I mean, I like Gatorade, but that's 'bout as far as I go….

If I ever had athlete's foot, my first reaction would be 'That's not my fing foot!'"

—Mitch Hedburg (Mitch All Together)

Act One

For as long as he had been given the responsibility of overseeing to the well-being of the two resident organics, Ratchet had come to one conclusion; humans were strange. From their odd insistences that he use their custom of 'knocking' to announce his presence whenever he entered the private room that had been converted for their use, to their bizarrely extreme reluctance to expose any more then 70 of their bodies. Even when asked about the purpose of their 'clothing', neither Evelyn nor Cafei could provide a suitable explanation and none of the reasons provided between the two were consistent with one another, going so far as to try and explain with historical examples which in the end, surmounted to a very confusing conglomerate of facts, most of which neither one was certain were even true. They could not seem to agree on a single reason and Ratchet was left to ponder the paradox of Human clothing on his own. Their final answer essentially boiled down to "Just…because," in which they shrugged and left it thusly.

Yes, he decided, humans were indeed very strange little creatures.

And they were endlessly curious about everything and anything; asking questions about the seemingly most mundane things. Sometimes annoyingly so, but Ratchet always took a moment to answer their innocent queries. And in return, whenever he asked a question, even a simple one, both humans seemed to try hard and explain and/or answer in terms he could understand. And if their answers still made no sense, he would consult the human data stored in Metellus's databanks or ask Jazz over the private comms. And if he didn't know, then Ratchet would simply conclude the information was not worth knowing and leave it thusly.

So when he was unpacking a crate of medical supplies, he was not surprised to find both Evelyn and Cafei watching him curiously from their table next to his work station, quietly sitting side by side, as they did whenever he was doing something. He glanced mildly in their direction before returning his attention to the crate. As he pulled out a brand new laser scalpel, a few of the small rubber insulation balls fell onto the counter, bouncing off the surface and then to the floor. He glanced down at the small mess and scowled. Oh Joy…

"Hey Doc, what are those?" Cafei asked, pointing to the insulation spheres.

"They look like rubber balls," Evelyn stated.

"That's exactly what they are," Ratchet replied, crouching down to retrieve the wayward objects, and dropping them back into the crate, "We use them to insulate items during transport to prevent damage."

"O-o-o-oh. You mean like peanuts?" Cafei asked, tilting her head slightly. It took the medic a long while before he understood the gesture did not hold the same meaning for Humans as it did for Cybertronians; for a human, a head tilt was a motion to convey confusion or curiosity; something that he, ironically, found very confusing. Even more perplexing was when they began to integrate Mech body language with their own, assimilating further into the larger group it seemed, and often ended with sending off mixed signals. The same could be said for the crew, especially Mechs who spent a good amount of time around the femmes, as they began to use more human body language. It was all very taxing. Jazz, for instance, was the worst culprit of what Ratchet had diagnosed as 'cultural cross-contamination'.

Ratchet dipped into the human data and referenced the mentioned item, abruptly frowned. He turned at the dark haired human and gave her an odd look. "No, these are nothing like peanuts. For one thing, you could not eat them and I implore you not to try."

Evelyn and Cafei paused for a moment before both laughed, glancing at each other. "Not the vegetable," Evelyn replied with a giggle. "Cafei meant shipping peanuts. Humans use them as cushions when we ship stuff. They're just small pieces of foam. We only called them peanuts because that's the way they're shaped."

Ratchet was silent for a moment, not quiet understanding why humans would name two very different objects with the same designation. This puzzle only added to his assessment that humans were strange and he pondered if he should write an essay or a thesis of some kind on the very subject. His mouth pinched into an odd frown. "Well then yes, they would be like your 'peanuts', I suppose."

"Can I see one?" Evelyn asked, getting to her feet. Ratchet looked at her for a moment, before reaching back into the crate to pluck one of the rubber spheres and offered it to the human. She reached out and lifted it with both hands, gazing at it with intrigue.

"Looks like the same kind of balls they use in PE," Evelyn said to Cafei, who had also risen to her feet to take a look at the rubber ball. Evelyn weighed the ball by bouncing it ever so lightly in her hands and then turned it over so as to see the entire surface, "Even weighs the same. It's a bit bigger, though."

"Oh! Lemme see," Cafei said eagerly, holding her hands out, and Evelyn handed her the rubber ball. Cafei repeated the same observations as Evelyn, weighing and looking. She gripped the ball and flung it to the ground, catching it as it rebounded off the table's surface, much to the girl's glee.

Ratchet watched skeptical curiosity.

"You know what it looks like to me?" Cafei asked sending a sly glance towards her fellow human.

"What's that?" Evelyn asked warily and actually recoiled slightly.

Cafei grinned wickedly. "A dodge ball."

Act Two

Jazz walked into the Medbay.

"Jazz! Over here! Jazz!" The rapid calling of his name alerted him to the very two organics he had been looking for. Both Evelyn and Cafei were on the floor near the back of the room. Ratchet stood nearby, looking slightly more annoyed then usual. He noted the fact that the floor was covered in insulation balls might have something to do with it. Both humans held one of the aforementioned spheres in their hands. Cafei turned to Evelyn and raised her hand, signaling the other to pause, "Time out Evy, OK?"

Jazz grinned as he approached, carefully footing the rubber balls away to avoid stepping and/or tripping on them that would likely result in an ungracious meeting with the floor. "Hello ladies, hey Ratchet," Jazz greeted them amiably, walking closer. He glanced at the littered floor. "So…what are we doing?"

"Besides pointlessly pelting each other with rubber balls and making a mess?" Ratchet asked him, though it seemed to be more directed at the two tiny femmes.

"We said we'd clean it up," Cafei retorted before turning to Jazz, "We're playing dodge ball!"

Jazz grinned and crouched down closer to their level and picking up one of the rubber balls. "Are we now?"

"Yeah, but it's hard to play one-on-one." Evelyn replied, sounding slightly out of breath, but was smiling nonetheless.

Cafei looked at the ball in her hands, mouth pinched in a disappointed frown, "Yeah, it's more of a team sport. We'd ask you guys to play, but…well… sports aren't really Human-Mechs compatible."

Jazz tossed the small rubber sphere between each hand, mulling over the concept and his grin widened when inspiration hit. "Oh, I wouldn't say that," Jazz said slyly, eyeing the rubber sphere thoughtfully, "I think I know a way to make it work."

Above them, Ratchet's engines revved warningly. "Don't you dare, Jazz. There is no way these two are going to be playing this…game around any Mech. They'll get hurt or killed."

Jazz look up at the medic, undaunted. "Don't worry Doc; they won't be in any danger," He said and looked back down at the girls, "We'll just round up some of the guys who're off duty and play a match."

Evelyn looked almost as dubious as Ratchet, but far less vitriol, but Cafei was all grins and giggles. "Hell yes!"

"No." Ratchet said flatly.

"Aw c'mo-o-on!" Cafei whined, jumping up and down like an impatient toddler. "Jazz said we wouldn't be in any danger!"

"Yeah," Jazz added. "You can even be the referee if you want, Ratch. Just to make sure."

Act Three

"What are we doing here again?" Gears asked, engines revving irritably.

"Jazz said to meet him in the main practice room." Hound replied.

"Did he tell anyone why?" Ask Trailbreaker.

"Nope. Jazz just said to meet 'im here." Bumblebee replied.

"I wish he'd start making sense again," Brawn added. "He's harder to understand sometimes than it is to see Mirage."

The joke fell flat and some Mechs took a small side-step away from him.

"Real funny, guys," Brawn mumbled.

"Well, let's not mutiny just yet guys," Bumblebee said. "Aren't you at all curious what this is about?"

"No…not really." Gears grumbled.

"The message didn't say much. I wonder why he wanted to see all of us. Did anyone ask him?" Bluestreak wondered.

"Nope."

"Negative."

"You don't think this is some kind of a drill do you?"

"Frag, I hope not." Gears moaned.

"Hm. I never noticed this before."

"What?"

"There's a square grid on the ground."

"Well I'll be…there is."

"What's it for, do you think?"

"I haven't the slightest idea."

"It's a drill, I just know it. As soon as I came outta recharge I knew—"

"Mute it Gears."

The doors to the main practice room opened and all of the Mechs turned to look, expecting to see the host of their gathering. Instead, a bright yellow figure tromped through the door, pale eyes glowering out at nothing and everything.

"Who invited him?"

"Probably Jazz."

"Or maybe he's just here to rip apart another practice drone."

"Sounds a lot better then drills..."

"I said mute it Gears."

Sunstreaker glared at the gathered Mechs and made a large circle around them, finding a spot near the far wall to lean on. He crossed his arms, glared out from over his chest, and waited.

They all waited.

A breem or so later, much to their relief, the doors opened once again to admit the familiar black and white form of Jazz, followed, surprisingly, by Ratchet and Wheeljack. The engineer carried a container in his arms, Ratchet looked on forebodingly, and sitting atop each of Jazz's shoulders were the humans, Evelyn and Cafei.

"Finally!" Gears grumbled and there was a general chorus of assent. "What took you so slagging long? This better not be a fragging drill or I'm—"

The group reared on the smaller Mech, "Mute it Gears!"

"Now now, no need to get nasty fellas," Jazz simply grinned. "Sorry 'bout the wait. Took longer to fabricate the equipment then I thought." The saboteur lowered himself carefully and plucked the humans from his shoulders, setting them on the floor. Several of the gathered Mechs noted that both humans were carrying what looked like…crate insulation?

"Hello everyone," Evelyn greeted.

"Hey guys," Cafei greeted.

Jazz straightened himself and addressed the gathering while both Ratchet and Wheeljack fell in behind him, "I'm sure yer all wonderin' what the frag you're all doin' here, right?"

"Yes." Answered the group; some with annoyance coloring their tone, others with curiosity, all impatient.

"Well, Cafei and Evy have been 'round here for a while now, learnin' all about us and such, so we're gonna give 'em a chance to share bit of their culture with us," Jazz explained with a wide grin, "Seeing as we all could do with some good ol' culturin' now an' then. And, as we've learned, we certainly don't want this one getting' bored…," he gestured towards Cafei, who merely grinned innocently, "…and annoying our beloved CMO to death…" ("Too late," Ratchet grumbled) "…They're going to teach us all a human game."

Jazz glanced expectantly down at the two humans, who were all grins, before addressing the others once more.

"And yer all gonna play," Jazz finished. His statement was responded with mixed reaction. While Hound, Bluestreak, and Bumblebee looked interested, the others seemed ready to mutiny. Sunstreaker merely growled and began heading for the exit. Jazz called out to him, "You too, Sunshine!"

Sunstreaker glared menacingly towards the Mech, but didn't say anything.

"Think of it as a training exercise!" Jazz added helpfully.

"And if we refuse?" Gears griped.

Jazz's visor flashed. "Well that would be disobeying a senior officer's orders," Jazz pointed out cautiously. "And we all know how prickly Red Alert gets about those kinda things, don't we? He's probably watching us on the security feeds right now." Jazz turned to look towards a corner of the room, where a camera's lens focused in on the group. Jazz waved at it. "Heya Red!"

The room filled with grumbling and muttering and all of them seemed to agree on some level. Trailbreaker shrugged and crossed his arms, looking resigned to his fate, "So then…what do we do?"

Jazz stepped backwards and gestured to the two femmes. "The girls will explain everything to ya."

Cafei stepped up willingly, taking over the explanations. "Alright my good Mechs, the name of the game is Dodge ball and that is, essentially, the whole concept of the game. Dodging balls the other team throws at you and trying your level best not to get hit. We learn this game when we're still in elementary school…"

"—Primary phase of education—" Jazz interjected.

"They teach us a lot of team sports and stuff to help us with our social skills and stuff…" Cafei frowned momentarily, "…which is kinda backwards when you think about the point of the game…" She shrugged, "Anyway. It's a good way to teach fine motor skills. Plus it's really fun."

"And teaches you how to aim," Evelyn contributed. "And duck. Basic idea is you try to strike out the members of the other team."

"With what?" Hound asked.

Evelyn smiled and held up the rubber insulation sphere. "With rubber balls."

"Of course, the ones you guys will be using are size appropriate." Cafei added. She turned to Wheeljack. "Bring out the equipment 'Jack!"

Wheeljack put down the container he'd been carrying and opened it up, revealing it to be filled to the brim with red Mech sized rubber balls. The gathering of Mech stared at the container bemusedly. "Last Mech standing wins it for his team," Evelyn explained.

"We'll split everyone into two teams; four to each team," Cafei said, "We have eight rubber balls. Basically you grab one and throw it at someone on the other team. Like so…."

Cafei turned abruptly to Evelyn and chucked the rubber ball at the older woman. Evelyn yelped in surprise as the rubber sphere smacked her in the shoulder. "Hey!"

"Just like that." Cafei grinned. Evelyn glared at her before hurling her own ball at Cafei in retaliation. Cafei ducked under the flying rubber ball and grinned in victory, pointing to the woman. "Ha ha!"

The ball bounced off of Wheeljack's leg, rebounding back and smacking Cafei in the back of the head, causing her to tumble forward. She caught herself awkwardly and glared at Evelyn. The other human just laughed out loud in sweet revenge while the Mechs around them watched. Gears snickered.

"That doesn't count!" Cafei grumbled indignantly, rubbing the back of her head.

"Why not?" Evelyn asked.

"It hit me in the head!"

"Oh." Evelyn looked stymied. "Yeah well…we weren't playing for real anyway."

"What's wrong with the ball hitting someone in the head?" Hound asked.

"If you throw a ball at someone and it hits them in the head, then you're out," Cafei said, rubbing the back of her head. "But if they try to duck or dodge it and it hits them in the head, then they are out."

"Why?"

"I think they made that rule to keep kids from hurting each other too badly."

"Also, if you throw a ball at someone and they catch it, you're out. And if you get hit but someone on your team catches the ball before it hits the floor you're safe. The ball has to hit you and then hit the floor," Evelyn said. She turned to Cafei, "Did we forget anything?"

"Oh! Barriers!" Cafei said, "If you cross the line into the other team's 'space', you're out too. We've already marked the floor with a grid so you know."

From the back of the group someone made a 'ah-hah' noise, "So that's what it's for."

Bluestreak tilted his head in the human form of the gesture. "That's a lot of rules. I don't think I can remember them all."

"Don't worry, Blue," Evelyn assured, "It's easy once you start playing."

"How do we decide teams?" Trailbreaker asked.

"Cafei and I will choose the teams," Evelyn replied.

"You're not gonna be playing too are you?" Bluestreak asked with concern.

"No," Cafei grumbled, "Ratchet won't let us."

"Slagging right I won't." Ratchet snapped.

"What about you, Jazz?" Hound asked with a grin.

"Are ya kiddin'? A'course I'm playin'!"

"Ok," Evelyn reached into the pocket of her jeans and extracted a small silver coin. She flicked the coin into the air and then caught it, flipping it onto her hand, but keeping it covered. "Call it, Cafei."

Cafei called out, "George Washington!"

Evelyn peeled back her hand to reveal the face of the President and sighed. "Ok, you're first pick."

Cafei turned to the Mech and carefully considered…for about half a second. "Bumblebee!"

To say the group was surprised at Cafei's choice would be an understatement. For a moment, Bumblebee simply stood there and looked around at the Mechs staring back at him.

"Well don't just stand there," Cafei chastised, waving the minibot over, "Come stand over here, Bumbles."

Bumblebee made his way through the crowd and took up a spot behind Cafei. Evelyn stared at the girl for a moment before retuning her attention to the remaining Mechs.

"Um…I choose…" Evelyn glanced at each of the Mech's faces, contemplating her choice. Her eyes caught on a glint of yellow standing in the back of the crowd, scowl firmly in place, and before she could protest the action, the all too familiar sensation of pins-n-needles swept over her. She found herself suddenly commandeered by the voice as the he, through her, called out cheerfully, "SUNNY!"

Evelyn was murderous. Sideswipe!

'Come on! You can't tell me he wouldn't be good at this game,' the voice reasoned. 'He's fast.'

You should have asked!

'You wouldn't have chosen him,' Sideswipe argued. 'You probably would've have picked the rookie.'

Yeah, I would. Bluestreak is a gunner, remember? He's got the best aim on board!

A pause.

'…yeah well…Sunny's still a good choice.'

Ass.

When Evelyn returned her attention to reality, she was surprised to see Sunstreaker striding over to her at a pace that told her he really didn't want to be there. She felt very uneasy having the yellow Mech tower behind her as Cafei took her next pick.

"Brawn!" Cafei declared without a moment's hesitation. The Mechs all gave her strange looks, but nevertheless, Brawn ambled over to her and stood beside her first choice. When the stout Mech glanced at Bumblebee, the yellow armored officer just tilted his head in a Mech-shrug.

"Bluestreak!" Evelyn called before Sideswipe could get a chance to sabotage her.

"I choose da Jazz-man!" Cafei announced.

Evelyn glanced between the three remaining Mechs; Trailbreaker, Hound, and Gears.

'Pick Hound.' Sideswipe said.

What about Trailbreaker? Evelyn asked.

'Oh please, He's a big Mech, I think he'll survive if you don't pick him.'

…Alright.

"Hound."

For the first time, Cafei hesitated with her choice, but only by a few seconds.

"Trailbreaker!" She chose and turning to Evelyn, she grinned unsympathetically. "That leaves you with Gears."

Gears looked thoroughly unamused and didn't bother to go stand with his team. Cafei stood with Bumblebee, Brawn, Trailbreaker, and Jazz while Evelyn stood with Sunstreaker, Hound, Bluestreak, and Gears (although the latter chose to keep his distance from the conglomerate of players). Somehow, as she surveyed her team, Evelyn had the feeling this wasn't going to end pleasantly.

Act Four

Apposing teams stood in their respective sides while Evelyn and Cafei watched from a safe distance near Ratchet and Wheeljack who stood to the side. Set along the white line in the middle of the field were the three red rubber balls. Each member of the team, except Gears, eyed the tree spheres determinedly.

"Alright! Is everyone ready?" Cafei shouted.

She received several enthusiastic revs in response. Grinning, Cafei raised her hand in the air and brought it down in a quick swipe. "Play ball!"

The air was suddenly alive with stomping feet as Mechs rushed to the center to try and claim one of the three rubber balls before someone from the other side could. Cafei and Evelyn were yelling over the din, shouting encouraging words to their team while booing and trying to goad the other. Cafei cheered when Jazz was the first Mech to claim one of the rubber balls. Evelyn cheered especially when Sunstreaker managed to nab one too and Bluestreak slid to a halt to grab the last one. Trailbreaker remained farther back in his team's side, knowing his bulk was a liability in such a game of speed, while Brawn and Bumblebee flanked out in front of his, ready to catch and dodge. Jazz stood to the front, battle computer running at super sonic speeds to find the easiest target.

Sunstreaker was faster then a blur and a rubber ball came hurtling Jazz's way, missing him by mere millimeters as the saboteur leaped to the side and lost his balanced, toppling over and luckily missing the rubber ball Bluestreak had then thrown. As soon as he landed, Jazz threw his ball. Sunstreaker and Bluestreak leapt away from the flying object. It bounded off of Gears's chest, flying off into the air.

Scowl firmly set, arms cross, Gears stared off and grumbled sarcastically, and without any vocal inflection, "Oh dear. I am out. Woe is me."

And with that, he stalked off the field, passing by Ratchet and Wheeljack, and leaving the practice room. As the ball came flying back down to Earth—er, ship, Bumblebee followed its decent and reached out to catch it.

"Throw it Bee!" Jazz urged as he ducked another shot from Sunstreaker. He was beginning to think the yellow Mech might have it in for him. Grinning to himself, Jazz chuckled. So this was war.

Bumblebee look frantic, not quite sure what to do, and seemingly without aiming and without any cognitive thought, the little yellow Mech chucked the rubber sphere as hard as he could towards the other team. Sunstreaker sidestepped out of its path and as the ball bounced back off the floor, Hound caught it. Expertly, he sent it back to the other side with a surprisingly well aimed throw. Brawn scrambled away only to have it bounce off his foot and disturbing his balance, almost sending him toppling to the floor.

"You're out!" Hound yelled to the minibot. On the sidelines Evelyn cheered while Cafei booed and called foul.

"What foul?" Evelyn asked, turning to her. "He got hit, fair and square."

"I call do-over!" Cafei declared, not seeming to have heard the other human.

"What? This isn't the fourth grade; you don't get do-over's."

"I'm gonna tell on you. I want my phone call."

Evelyn rolled her eyes. "Cafei, stop being a baby. Besides, who would you going to call?"

Cafei grinned. Oh it was too easy. "Ghostbusters!"

Evelyn covered her eyes as she felt another migraine coming on. "You're insane…."

"Thank you!" Cafei said cheerfully.

"You're welcome…" She mumbled.

Brawn didn't seem too upset with being the first of his team out, but he was quickly joined by Trailbreaker when Bluestreak got his hold on a ball. Instead of leaving like Gears had, the two Mechs decided to help their team and became ball fetchers. While the game had started off with only three, Wheeljack began to feed the game with more and soon there were eight in play, a challenging number to keep track of. So Brawn and Trailbreaker fetched rubber balls to toss to Bumblebee and Jazz as they fended off Sunstreaker, Bluestreak and Hound.

As Bumblebee accepted some ammunition from Brawn, something smacked him in the side of the head, sending error banners flashing across his vision.

"Foul!" Cafei's voice yelled over the din. "Hound, you are OUT!"

When Bumblebee straightened out several jarred programs, he looked over to see Hound leave the field, waving sheepishly at him.

: Sorry about that Bee: The Mech sent over the private channel, chuckling.

: Don't worry about it. No harm done. : The officer replied cheerfully.

: I think I know why Cafei chose you and Brawn now. : Hound said.

: Why's that? :

: You minis are harder to hit. :

Bumblebee laughed. : Being short does have its advantages. :

: And here I was thinking she was just crazy. :

: Hey! Remind me again, who's the one who is out? :

: Point taken. :

And the game went on.

As Bluestreak became more enveloped in the game, his aim was getting better. Both Jazz and Bumblebee found it hard to dodge both Sunstreaker and Bluestreak at the same time and soon Jazz found himself alone on the field of battle after his valiant yellow comrade took a rubber ball to the chest. But Jazz was not one to surrender. Oh no.

Jazz could hear the two human femmes cheering from their spot and he grinned to himself. Taking up a rubber ball, Jazz leapt over one Sunstreaker had thrown his way and hurled his towards the sunshine Mech. Sunstreaker leaned back in a very matrix-like move as he dodged the ball, only for it to hit Bluestreak it his left wing panel as he too tried to dodge.

"Ah!" Bluestreak winced when the sensitive panel was struck, sending sharp twangs through his upper body. Jazz felt a momentary swell of guilt when he realized where the ball had struck the young gunner, well aware of the sensitivity of sensory panels, but quickly recovered when the gunner laughed it off and quickly scrambled to be out of the way of the two remaining titans.

'At a boy Blue! Jazz silently cheered for the younger Mech as he left the field. Jazz glanced back at his opponent who was, likewise, staring intently on him.

And then there were two.

Act Five

"I wish I had my camera," Cafei said with amazement as she watched, wide eyed, at the field. Beside her, Evelyn nodded in complete agreement and with equal astonishment.

"No kidding," She replied. "It's like…like…"

"…robot wars and WWE had a baby and chocked it up on radical amounts of steroids."

"…yeah," Evelyn agreed at length.

On the field, Jazz and Sunstreaker seemed to be utterly encompassed with their one remaining task; knocking the other with a large rubber ball. On either side of their respective territory, their team mates fed their one remaining players with ammunition while cheering and jeering. Both humans sat dumbfounded at the sheer speed at which the two played. Jazz seemed very good at leaping clear out of the way of flying balls while Sunstreaker, always the perfectionist, used his agility, that seemed down right inconceivable for a being his size, and opted for more nimble and showy movements. It was almost as if the yellow Mech was teasing Jazz by allowing the ball to come so close to him, but still manage to dodge it.

"This game is absolutely pointless," Ratchet muttered beside them.

"For someone who's spent the last few months practically babysitting us," Cafei said with without taking her eyes from the field, "You seemed surprised. I would think you'd have realized by now that 'Pointlessness' is a reoccurring theme in Humans."

"I am beginning to see this," Ratchet replied. Beside them, Wheeljack just chuckled.

"I'll tell you one thing though," Evelyn added, "I'm irrefutably thankful I never had to go to school with a thirty foot tall Mech."

Cafei laughed, "I know! Gym class was tough enough without adding in giant metal aliens."

"Actually," Evelyn muttered after some thought, "I don't actually remember ever enjoying it when we playing Dodge ball in school. I was always picked last…and usually first out."

"Really?" Cafei asked, seeming astonished. "I loved it! I was always picked first. Always last out too. I am the Queen of dodge ball!"

"Knowing you? I'm not surprised," Evelyn glanced at the field, "Although, I think you've been officially dethroned. How many innocent nerds and slow-pokes have fallen under your aim?"

Cafei grinned evilly; arms crossed regally, "Millions."

"You're such a dictator," Evelyn shook her head, trying to suppress her smile. "I pity the man who falls for you. He'd have to be a masochist or something."

"Hey!"

Act Six

Jazz always enjoyed a good friendly competition, but the seemingly innocent game they ha started was quickly turning into a personal vendetta. The longer the game went on, the harder he pushed himself. He could already feel his energy reserves draining. But he couldn't slow down, not for a moment. As soon as he let up, even a smidgen, that was when Sunstreaker would get him, so he kept his optics trained on the yellow Mech; waiting, watching, hoping for an opening.

Sunstreaker swiftly dodged another shot from Jazz, leaning away from it as it came mere inches from his pristine armor plating. Jazz picked up another ball from Trailbreaker and took up position. Quickly accepting a new round from Bluestreak, Sunstreaker took two long striding steps to the side before hurling the innocent rubber balls towards the saboteur. Jazz's battle computer went haywire and his processor screamed, 'Left! Left! Jump left!'

And he did. He leapt far to his left, missing the oncoming ball, but as he stretched his leg out to catch him, he felt his weight slip and as he was falling, he gripped the ball in his hands and with all his remaining energy, chucked the pathetic ball of rubber for all it's worth towards the yellow mech.

Jazz's optics fritzed when he fell and his vision was obscured by warning banners. In his vulnerable state, he expected to feel a rubber ball careen into him, but no such attack came. Instead, he heard Cafei scream, but he wasn't sure if it was a good scream or a bad one. His vision cleared and he glanced over to see Sunstreaker sulking away, ire practically emanating from him, rising off his armor like heat. Another quick glance over to the sidelines and he saw Cafei jumping up and down, spinning, dancing, and hooting in palpable delight. Beside her, Evelyn looked disheartened.

Laying on his back and looking up towards the ceiling, Jazz came face to face with his team mates; all of whom were grinning down at him. "So," He asked in a tired, worn voice, "Did I win?"

Act Seven

Evelyn was practically pouting, but her disenchanted mood was brought on more from the grumbling curses of Sideswipe as he ranted and raved in her head about cheating and inadequate refereeing. She rubbed at her temples lethargically, knowing she was liable to be hearing his objections for many days to come if not more, and trying to drown him out. As her mind was filled with Sideswipe's laments, her ear drums were assaulted with Cafei's delighted whooping and blatant flaunting of her team's victory.

"We are the champions," Cafei sang, dancing around shamelessly, "No time for losers 'cause we are the champions…of the WORLD!"

The thrilled art student continued her boasting while dancing circles around the Mech's feet. Ratchet had gone to Jazz's side to see what damage he'd earned himself. As Cafei continued her audacious flaunting, the Mechs around her seemed to be tiring of her cheering and sent her somewhat annoyed glances which were promptly ignored. Ratchet, especially, sent pale optic glances at her, frown seeming to increase more and more into an irritated scowl as the girl continued unabated until finally he seemed to have run off the end of his rope.

"Cafei!" He barked. The girl, mid-grapevine, paused and looked over at the medic curiously.

"What?" She asked innocently.

"Strike three!" The Medic barked.

Author's notes part 2: For those of you who wondered whatever happened to strike three from Chapter 3: 'Insomniac'.