Even though she didn't want to, she had to go on living. She had to show her children that she was okay. That things were okay. So she went about doing what she did everyday pretending that no one had died. After all she had mourned Anakin's death years ago, she couldn't...wouldn't do it again.
As she prepared the evening meal the comm station buzzed. Curious to know who was comming her and hoping that it was Obi-Wan, she answered only to be disappointed when it was Bail Organa.
"Thank the maker that you're safe! They said that Vader was on Naboo before he met his fate on Coruscant," Bail said.
"I didn't realize that Vader was anywhere near Naboo. I was hoping that he didn't track us here," Padme lied not knowing why she was even doing it.
"I take it that you heard. Padme, you must realize that all traces of Anakin Skywalker were long gone before he died," Bail said gently.
Padme's eyes flashed. "I realized that when he choked me Bail," she said tightly.
"I'm sorry Padme. You are the last person that I wish heartbroken. The Alliance is reconvening on Hoth in four days, we're going to discuss this new turn in events. With Vader dead, the Emperor is weakened, he'll be scrambling for a replacement, we don't know who or what is going to replace Vader. Should you wish to be here you know where we are, I will make up an excuse for your absence if you would like to take a few days to mourn," Bail told her.
"I appreciate that Bail. I will join you as soon as Obi-Wan returns," Padme told him.
"Don't tell me that General Kenobi took the twins to kill their father!" Bail said alarmed.
"Luke and Leia are with me," Padme told him flatly.
"I see. Well the Alliance will keep a look out for the three jedi. I suppose the rest of the Alliance will want them here to celebrate Vader's death," Bail said.
"I'm very busy here Bail, can I get back to you later," Padme said.
"Yes yes. I'm Sorry Padme. I know how much you loved Skywalker," Bail said ending the transmission.
Padme cut off the transmission and finished her task.
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Luke and Leia Skywalker were in a somber mood all day neither speaking much. They took no joy in anything and skipped their morning swim and ignored every other activity. Now they were seated around the table for the third meal of the day with their mother Han and Chewie. No one said a word. The news of Anakin's death seemed to sink in through them. For the most part neither Skywalker felt like eating.
Han looked around the table and the sight pulled at him. "Come on guys. It's not the end of the galaxy ya know. Who knows maybe it's a good thing," he said.
At those words Padme set her fork down and left the table.
"I didn't mean it that way!" Han called after her.
"You sure know how to put your foot in your mouth!" Leia snapped.
"I didn't mean it that way!" Han defended himself.
"Yes you did! He wasn't Darth Vader anymore! They killed a jedi not a sith! My father was trying to help the only way he could!" Leia yelled standing up.
"Leia," Luke said trying calm his twin.
"He was trying help, Luke," Leia said.
Luke got up and hugged her. "We'll get through this," he told her.
"Perhaps this was supposed to happen. Perhaps it couldn't have been stopped," Han suggested.
"We should have been there," Leia said.
"If we had known..." Luke began but his attention was drawn to the living room. Leia's as well. Before anyone could utter a sound both twins darted towards the living room.
"Hey where are you going?" Han called after them. When he got no answer he turned to Chewie. "I can never win here," he muttered.
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Luke and Leia skidded to a halt in the living room as the fireplace moved aside and Obi-Wan stepped through supporting a wounded and a halfway unconscious Anakin.
"A little help if you don't mind," Obi-Wan said.
"How?" Luke asked.
"The third jedi," Leia said.
"Fine as always I do things myself," Obi-Wan said getting Anakin on the couch. The new contact making Anakin grit his teeth and groan in pain. "Don't even try to get sympathy for this Anakin, you're the one who decided to show off and now look at you. You're going to have to settle for mediocre care here since we can't take you to a medical facility," he said.
"Bite me Obi-Wan!" Anakin seethed.
"You always were a terrible patient," Obi-Wan tisked. "Leia we can use your skills here," he said addressing the twins.
"No, a sixteen year old is not operating on me," Anakin argued.
"She's you're best hope unless you wish to surrender to the Alliance," Obi-Wan told him.
"I'm not surrendering to anybody," Anakin told him.
"What happened?" Luke asked.
"I'll let your father fill you in once he's no longer in need of immediate medical attention," Obi-Wan told him and turned back to Anakin. "Next time don't show off! How many times do I have to tell you that?"
"I'll get my medical gear," Leia said leaving the room.
Anakin met Luke's worried gaze. "I've had worse you know," he told him.
"Yes and you were the one padawan who not only got into the most mischief, but had the most injuries. In fact there were pools to see what kind of injury you would have next," Obi-Wan tisked.
"If I remember correctly I won a great number of those under your name," Anakin countered.
"You cheated," Obi-Wan told him.
"What happened Ben?" Leia asked coming back into the room with her trunk full of medical supplies.
"Mom won't like you doing that in here," Luke pointed out.
"She always had a fondness for this room," Leia agreed.
"I'm going to have to move aren't I," Anakin groaned.
"Luke, you can help your father into his room," Obi-Wan said.
"You still didn't tell us what happened," Luke said.
"Stop asking questions right now, lets just get your father into his own bed," Obi-Wan said.
"I don't want to hurt him," Luke said eying his father's clenched teeth.
"You're not going to hurt him," Obi-Wan told him patiently.
"Okay," Luke said slowly pulling Anakin's arm up while supporting the back of his shoulders while pulling him up, but as he got his father to stand up Anakin yelled in pain and Luke would have dropped him if it weren't for Obi-Wan's interference. "I'm sorry!" Luke apologized quickly.
"You didn't do anything wrong," Obi-Wan told him and between the two of them, they were able to get Anakin out of the room and climbing the stairs up into his own room where they set him on the bed.
"Now you can tell us what happened," Leia said pointedly to Obi-Wan.
"Your father thought it was a good idea to get cocky and ended up getting stabbed in the side with a lightsaber," Obi-Wan told them as he folded his arms across his chest.
"I was having fun, something I haven't had in a long time," Anakin defended himself.
"You have a warped idea of fun Anakin," Obi-Wan told him.
Luke snorted trying to hide his amusement so far failing.
"Find something funny?" Anakin demanded.
Luke sobered up. "No sir," he said.
"Watching you two argue is sort of amusing," Leia admitted. She then shook her head. "This is weird," she said as she pressed her hand against Anakin's side hitting the spot where he was stabbed making Anakin scream. "Okay then, that's the spot."
"What is going on in here?" Padme demanded coming into the room and stopped dead when she saw Anakin. "You're alive!"
"Not for long if Leia messes things up," Luke couldn't help replying.
"I want a medical droid!" Anakin demanded.
"Nonsense," Obi-Wan chided.
"You had the opportunity to steal one from the temple!" Anakin snapped at him.
"A little pain wont hurt you," Obi-Wan said unaffected.
"You would say that wouldn't you," Anakin said darkly.
Obi-Wan seemed to pale some at the meaning behind his words. "That's ancient history now," he said.
"That was over sixteen years ago!"
"What is he talking about?" Padme demanded.
"Nothing Padme, just a little argument from before the end of the war," Obi-Wan lied and used the force to smack Anakin unnoticed.
"I'll see if I can find Threepio or Artoo," Padme said quickly leaving the room.
"Looks like you're off the hook," Luke said to Leia.
"Threepio and Artoo won't be any help on this," Leia said frowning.
"Mom's not going to let you do it," Luke pointed out.
"Then lets get started while she tries to find Threepio, I swear he seems to be hiding lately," she said and both twins turned to look at their father.
"What would you know about that?" they asked in unison addressing their father.
"I'm not talking," Anakin told them.
"Fine, but I warn you, I might slip up," Leia threatened.
Anakin looked over at Obi-Wan, "She's part sith," he said frowning.
"Leia, don't threaten your father, it wont work. Remember he used to be a slave, he can take torture," Obi-Wan said.
Anakin cursed at Obi-Wan in huttise making the older jedi frown.
"Cool, you've gotta teach me that! Threepio gave me lessons, but he didn't teach me that!" Luke said.
"Whatever it was he said I'm sure you're mother would be upset if she heard you mutter those words," Obi-Wan told him.
"Uh, will one of you remove his tunic so that I can stitch him up?" Leia asked.
"I'm not doing it," Luke said.
Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. "Fine I'll do it," he said, "Luke you help your father up for a moment."
"But I'll hurt him again," Luke protested.
"For force sake, stop whining and start acting like a jedi!" Anakin said getting annoyed. "I don't need any help. I pulled myself out of a lot more painful situations," he muttered struggling to sit up and finally managing it briefly enough for Obi-Wan to pull off his tunic before he dropped down on the bed. He then noticed the syringe in Leia's hand. "Do you even know what you're doing?" he demanded.
Leia nodded. "Medicine is my hobby, Ben said that it might come in handy," she told him.
"Did you suggest that she take this up?" Anakin asked Obi-Wan.
"I didn't have to," Obi-Wan answered. "Trust her, she's been tutored by top physicians."
"This'll minimize the pain," Leia told him sticking him with the syringe.
"You better have paid attention to your instructors," Anakin muttered before he slipped unconscious.
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When Anakin opened his eyes back up the sun was rising. As his eyes focused he found himself staring into a pair of brown eyes, but they weren't Padme's.
"How are you feeling?" Leia asked.
"Like I can eat an entire bantha," Anakin told her.
Leia looked at him confused apparently not knowing whether or not that meant something good or bad. "Compared to?" she asked.
"Being eaten by the sarlacc," Anakin told her.
"I don't know what that is," Leia told him.
"You've never been to Tatooine have you?" Anakin asked.
Leia shook her head.
"That'll be fixed soon. That's where I'm from anyway, but you probably already know that. Anyway, the sarlacc is a creature that lives in a very large sand pit and if you fall into it and the sarlacc eats you, you die a slow death as you're slowly digested for over a thousand years," Anakin told her.
Leia made a face. "Yuck. And ouch," she said. "So eating an entire bantha is good?"
Anakin smiled. "Yeah, it's good. On Tatooine, you can win a prize for eating an entire bantha in one sitting," he told her.
"Well Luke can win that one," she said, "if I help him."
Anakin chuckled. "You get that from me," he said.
"I have a question for you, you don't have to answer if you don't want to though," Leia said.
"What is it?" Anakin asked.
"Your skin, I noticed that it's well new, I mean as in that you've had plastic surgery. What happened?" she asked.
"You're right, I don't want to answer that question. To put it plainly, I've had my remaining limbs chopped off and I was set on fire," Anakin told her.
Leia looked at him horrified. "And you survived that?!" she hissed.
"You're keeping your voice down, is there any particular reason why?" Anakin asked.
"Luke is sleeping in the chair," Leia told him.
"I see."
"Was it Ben?" Leia asked
"Was it Obi-Wan what?" Anakin asked.
"Who chopped you up and set you on fire," Leia confirmed.
"No," Anakin lied.
Leia frowned. "You're lying," she said.
"Lets drop this subject okay," Anakin ordered.
"Okay, but only because Mom is standing at the door," Leia agreed.
Anakin turned over so that he was laying on his back and watched Padme walk in and over to Luke who looked like he was ready to fall out of the chair in his sleep. "You can't throw me out yet, I'm injured," he said addressing his wife.
"Stop assuming that you know what I was going to say," Padme told him placing a hand on Luke's shoulder to wake him.
"If you wake him up, he'll hit the floor before his instincts kick in," Anakin told him.
"I think I know my children better than you do," Padme told him with no hint of malice in her voice.
Anakin raised an eyebrow at her. "Yeah? Well I know what's going to happen if you wake him because I've done it. And trust me marble floors are the hardest thing to wake up to," he said.
Padme ignored him and gently shook Luke's shoulder, "Luke, honey," she whispered.
"What happened?!" Luke started and promptly fell to the floor taking the chair with him. "Owe, Mom!"
"I think that I owe you an 'I told you so'" Anakin told her smugly.
Leia giggled. "Luke, you're a goof," she said.
Padme turned to her daughter. "Did you manage to get some sleep?" she asked.
"She woke up just after I did," Anakin lied for her.
Padme eyed Leia searching for signs that she'd been up all night. She nodded satisfied. "Breakfast will be ready in an hour," she told them before leaving the room.
"She didn't even ask how you were feeling," Luke frowned.
"She knew that I was fine, she never needs to ask," Anakin told him. "He then turned to Leia. "I suppose the eye drops and eye cream come in handy," he said.
"How'd you know?" Leia asked.
"I've pulled that trick hundreds of times. There were many times that I couldn't sleep, but with the help of eye drops and eye cream I was able to fake it," Anakin told her. "I do suggest that you wind up getting some rest today," he added flatly.
"At least you didn't wake up to marble," Luke grumbled as he stood up and righted the chair.
"I tried to save you from that fate," Anakin told him.
"Well you didn't do a very good job," Luke told him.
"You're mother is very hardheaded and stubborn. One of the things that I love about her," Anakin told him.
"What is Tatooine like?" Leia asked.
"You'll have to experience it, I don't have enough good memories of it to give you an accurate description," Anakin told her.
"Why are we talking about Tatooine anyway?" Luke asked.
"Because you're going to visit it. Especially during the pod racing season. I suppose you already know that I won my freedom by winning a podrace," Anakin told them.
"You raced in a pod race?!" Luke asked getting interested.
"When I was a kid. I finally won when I was nine. I was able to win my freedom, but I couldn't win my mother's," Anakin told them.
"Is she still there?" Leia asked.
"Yeah, she's still there," Anakin said.
"Is that why we're going there, to visit her?" Leia asked.
"We can see her when we see my step brother," Anakin told her.
"She's dead isn't she?" Luke asked seeing the look in Anakin's eyes when he mentioned his mother.
"Yeah, she is," Anakin admitted.
"How long?" Leia asked sadly.
"Twenty years," Anakin told her.
"How did she die?" Luke asked.
Anakin remained silent as he remembered his mother's death ...and what he did after. "She was kidnapped by animals. She died a violent death," he said at last.
"You were there when she died weren't you?" Leia asked hugging her knees.
"Yes," Anakin confirmed.
"That was what started your path to darkness wasn't it?" Luke asked.
"Yes," Anakin admitted.
"I don't want to know what you did," Luke said.
"I can tell you, it might stick in your mind so that you don't repeat my mistakes should anything happen," Anakin suggested.
"I'm good thanks," Luke told him.
Anakin turned to Leia and reached up to wipe away a tear. "You know things happen for a reason. The force has it's way of testing us. It gives us two paths and then tests us to see if we choose the quick and easy path or if we stick to the virtuous path. I always choose the quick and easy way when I was younger. In retrospect with the choices that I made, I am actually happy that she died when she did. So that she wouldn't have become heartbroken over what I became. She had suffered too much in life than to live with the knowledge that her only child was a monster," he told them.
"What was she like?" Leia asked.
Anakin smiled. "She was beautiful. She was strong, smart, kind. She was a very simple woman. But she was sad. I never wanted to leave her. But she wanted a better life for me and insisted that I leave her to go with Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan's master," he told them.
"Have you gone to visit her since she died?" Luke asked.
"No. I haven't been to Tatooine since. During the clone wars, I didn't have time for it, even though Owen had tried to convince me to visit. I should comm him ahead of time before I drop by unexpected again," he said.
"If he's you're step brother, does that make him our uncle?" Leia asked.
"I suppose it does," Anakin said.
"Has Mom met him?" Leia asked.
"Yes. She was with me when I last went to Tatooine to pay a visit to my mother, we weren't married yet, we were just friends at the time," Anakin answered.
"Wouldn't Uncle Owen be surprised when you and Mom bring us to visit him," Leia said smiling at the thought.
"Yes I suppose he'll be surprised," Anakin agreed not bothering to correct her that their mother wouldn't be with them and that he wouldn't be just visiting Tatooine, he would be staying there permanently.
"I'm so very sorry to interrupt, But Miss Padme had instructed that I bring this up for you," Threepio said walking into the room balancing a large serving tray with three platters. He set the tray down on the table before bowing and shuffling out of the room.
Anakin frowned. "Ungrateful droid," he muttered. He then sighed. "Even my own droid turned on me," he said sadly.
"Threepio belongs to you?" Luke asked.
"Yes," Anakin said sitting up carefully. "I built him for my mother," he informed them. He took Luke's arm after swinging his legs over the side of the bed and used Luke's support to stand up before walking carefully over to the table where he carefully sat down. "You know twenty years ago I would have just jumped out of that bed," he couldn't help from saying.
"How old are you?" Luke asked.
"Younger than your mother," Anakin told him.
"How much younger?" Leia asked.
"Five years," Anakin answered.
"When's your life day?" Luke asked.
"Telona third," Anakin answered.
"That's a month away," Leia frowned.
"I don't want anything," Anakin told her. "Now sit down and eat," he commanded.
Luke and Leia sat down across from him and pulled their platters to them.
"Do you know when ours is?" They asked.
"Yes," Anakin told them.
"It's in three weeks," Luke told him expectantly.
"Do you know what we want?" Leia asked.
"I can't afford anything right now," Anakin told them before they could go down the list of desired items.
"Use Mom's money," Luke said.
"Technically it's your money too since you're married," Leia pointed out.
"Your mother's money is her money, not mine. It was never mine to begin with," Anakin told her.
"What about Vader's money?" Luke asked.
"Vader's money doesn't exist," Anakin told him.
"Didn't you save some before you decided to fool the emperor?" Leia asked.
"The emperor monitored Vader's money, I couldn't save any," Anakin told her which deflated some of her hope.
"It would have been nice if you could," Leia muttered.
"And I would have given it all to the Alliance, they could use the funds more than you can," Anakin told her.
"We could have been rich," Luke pointed out.
"Jedi don't need money," Anakin told them and glanced at each of them. "Besides, your mother has enough money to keep fine clothes on your back," he told them.
"Compared to Vader's money, it's specks of sand," Luke said.
"There'll be no more talk of money. I don't have any, so leave it alone. I never had any money growing up and I didn't complain. As long as I had something to do I was happy," Anakin said strictly.
"I see that you're healed already," Obi-Wan said from the doorway. He then looked around. "I thought I told the two of you to bring cots in here if you insisted on sleeping in here," he said crossing his arms.
"I slept next to Dad while Luke slept in a chair," Leia said.
Obi-Wan nodded. "Did the marble floor wake you up?" he asked Luke.
"Sorta," Luke said.
"Good, perhaps later you'll find a more suitable place to sleep than a chair," Obi-Wan said.
"Yes Master," Luke said.
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"Are you okay Padme?" Han asked pretty much unsure on what to do to comfort the woman who was like a mother to him.
"I'm fine," Padme told him.
"Are you sure?" Han asked.
Padme took her hands away from her face and clasped them on the table. "I just can't believe he would pull a stunt like that and not warn us beforehand," she said frustrated.
"Um... well... is this normal?" Han asked.
"The Anakin Skywalker I knew would have given me a heads up before he faked his death!" Padme told him.
"He does have a lot of nerve," Han said hoping that he was agreeing with her.
"This act is further proof that he isn't my husband anymore," Padme said.
"Well, ah, people change," Han said. He then leaned forward. "I bet you're not the same person you were so many years ago," he said.
"I haven't changed Han," Padme told him standing up. She walked over to the terrace and hugged herself. "He claims to still love me, but then he pulls a stunt like this," she said.
"You know I'm the wrong person you want to be talking to," Han said.
"I'm sorry Han, I don't mean to be dumping this on you," Padme told him.
"Look, you're upset and I heard that when your upset that talking helps, so maybe you should go talk to him," Han suggested.
"I might just do that," Padme said coming upon the decision.
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Luke and Leia both finished their breakfast under Obi-Wan's watchful eyes.
"You two should go meditate somewhere and then try to get some sleep," Anakin said directing the last part to Leia who groaned.
"I think you're father too would like some peace and quiet," Obi-Wan agreed.
"Go, I'll be fine," he told them.
"Okay Dad," Luke said standing up, he gave Anakin a quick hug. "By the way, I knew that you were alive," he added.
Leia followed suit giving her father a tight hug. "I love you Daddy," she whispered before following her twin out of the bedroom.
Once they were gone Anakin turned to Obi-Wan. "I need you to do me a favor," he said.
"What is it now?" Obi-Wan asked.
"I'm going to give you a name of a holy man, I need you to find him and bring him here," Anakin told him.
"What do you need a holy man for?" Obi-Wan asked.
"Just tell him that the Skywalkers will be expecting him and to bring paperwork," Anakin told him.
"Anakin..." Obi-Wan began.
"I'm giving Padme what she wants and you can't stop me," Anakin told him.
"Anakin, you don't want this," Obi-Wan told him hoping that he could talk him out of it.
"I don't want to fight anymore Obi-Wan. It's better for everyone in the long run," Anakin said.
"Is it better for Luke and Leia?" Obi-Wan asked. "At least think of them before you start splitting their life up."
"Is it better for them to have their parents fighting all the time? Believe me I am thinking of them. For once I am thinking about what is best for my family!" Anakin told him.
"You can't give up now Anakin. It may seem rough right now, but it will get better, give it time!" Obi-Wan told him.
"Padme doesn't love me anymore, I'm not sticking around for that," Anakin told him.
"Anakin, Padme does love you! I know this for a fact because it's always your name she calls out for at night, I hear her! The japer snippet you carved for her is still around her neck!" Obi-Wan told him.
"I've made up my mind Obi-Wan," Anakin said flatly.
"You're going to regret this," Obi-Wan told him.
"I regret a great many things, what's one more thing!" Anakin said slamming his fist down on the table making the dishes clatter.
"I want no part of this Anakin, find someone else to do your dirty work," Obi-Wan told him. "If you want to do something that will torment you for the rest of your life, that's on you," he added before leaving the room.
When he was gone Anakin placed his face in his hand before swiping viciously across the table throwing the dishes across the room where they shattered on the floor. He then rested his elbow on the arm of the chair and his forehead back into his hand. He didn't lift his head when he felt a familiar prescience enter the room. He didn't look up when she walked into the room and over to the broken glass, and bend to clean it up.
"Just leave it, for once just leave it," he said.
Padme stood up and watched him. "How are you?" she asked.
"You're here for a reason Padme, just come out and say it, don't waste your breath asking a question that you already know the answer to," Anakin said flatly.
"I wanted to talk about what you did," Padme told him.
"There are a number of things that I have done, which one of them do you wish to talk about?" Anakin asked. He braced himself on the arms of the chair so that he could get up. "I don't need your help," he said when she moved to help him. Slowly he stood up and walked over to the edge of the bed, picked up his inner tunic and pulled it on gritting his teeth when he pulled at the incision.
"Why did you fake your death?" she asked.
"For the same reasons you faked yours," Anakin told her sitting down on the edge of the bed.
"Why didn't you tell anybody what you were doing?" she demanded.
"I told Obi-Wan," Anakin told her. "If I had told Luke and Leia they would have wanted to come with and I know that you would have been against that," he said.
"But you didn't tell me," Padme said flatly.
"I didn't think you cared," Anakin told her.
"The sixteen years that you spent as Vader has made you inconsiderate of others," Padme told him coldly.
"I thought this was going to be a civil conversation," Anakin said. He shook his head. "You know what. I'm done fighting with you. You've got your wish," he told her.
"My wish?" Padme asked growing alarmed.
"I can't stay here and keep fighting for something that is clearly over," Anakin told her.
"What are you talking about?" Padme asked her alarm growing.
"Our marriage is over Padme, I see it now. You've known for years, I'm just now accepting it," Anakin said.
Padme didn't say anything. This wasn't happening. Everything was happening way too fast. She finally had her husband back and now she was loosing him all over again. Memories of a happier time flashed before her eyes. She couldn't be loosing it without a chance to get it back. She needed to say something to salvage the situation. "Ani..." what could she say? Her heart was screaming at her to apologize. To tell him that she still loved him. But her mouth was failing her.
"We'll need to work out a schedule for when I get to see Luke and Leia. We don't even have to see each other. You can go on with your life," Anakin said.
"Where will you go?" she asked. Stop him! Tell him that you love him! Speak up!
"Back to Tatooine. I'm sure that Owen will help me get back on my feet, find me a job somewhere, probably fixing things," Anakin said.
"Are you sure this is what you want?" she asked hoping that he would take the bait she was trying to throw out.
"I don't want to fight with you anymore, this is the only solution," Anakin told her.
He didn't answer her question, there was still hope. At least she hoped there was. But she knew that he had made up his mind and there was no changing it, it didn't stop her heart from breaking again. "This is the only solution" She didn't want it to be, but he was right. She came up here to talk things over, but almost ended up in another fight. She sank down in a chair as the realization hit her. She was getting a divorce. She had feared this since her their wedding. But back then it would have been something else that would have caused them to get a divorce. Not this. "I love you." But obviously love wasn't enough.