Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is the creation of Anno and Gainax. I don't own it, make no claims to it, and am making no profit from the fan fiction. No infringement of copyright is intended. In other words, please don't sue.
Chapter Nineteen
In retrospect, Rei decided that her plan to prevent her termination by destroying her clones may have had a fatal flaw in it. Namely, that she had failed to seriously consider the possibility that Commander Ikari might decide to kill her anyway, either out of uncontrollable rage or a belief that with her so disobedient his scenario was doomed to failure anyway.
It wasn't that Rei had never even thought of these possibilities, it was that she'd discounted them out of hand. Not in all the time she'd known him, after all, had Gendo Ikari ever allowed his emotions to master him for even the briefest moment. And while the odds of his scenario coming to fruition did seem increasingly small, she had felt certain he would not trade in a slim chance for no chance, not after ten years of preparation.
Yet now, seeing the molten rage in his eyes, not the least bit concealed by his orange glasses…
"Why did you do it?" Gendo practically snarled as he paced around his desk in agitation. "Why did you murder your sisters?"
"They were my sisters in the genetic sense only," Rei said. "In truth, they were little more than components for the Dummy System and potential replacements for myself."
"Why did you do it!" Gendo barked, his already thin patience not helped by Rei's dodge.
Rei flinched. "I did not wish to be replaced."
"So you thought that the best way to achieve this end was to destroy your clones," Gendo growled.
"I am no longer expendable," Rei said, hoping the reminder would cause him to rein in any urge to terminate her.
"Are you still ready to fulfill your ultimate purpose when the time to do so arrives?" Gendo asked, posing the question that Rei had feared.
The First Child hesitated, her awakened survival instinct warring with her deeply ingrained, albeit fraying loyalty to Gendo Ikari. She realized it was going to be much more difficult to lie to the man who had burned his hands in the process of rescuing her from Unit Zero's superheated entry plug than pressing the button to destroy her clones had been.
But lie she did.
"Y-Yes, sir."
Gendo's eyes narrowed and his right hand, the one closest to the desk drawer that Rei knew contained a firearm, twitched visibly. Rei winced, realizing she hadn't sounded terribly convincing.
Fortunately, Gendo didn't go for the gun. His rage seemed to leave him in a great rush and he sighed, looking deflated. "I can't believe that you would do this after everything I've done for you, Rei," he said softly.
Despite herself, Rei felt a stab of guilt at his words.
"Get out of my sight," Gendo ordered.
"Sir," Rei said with a small nod, quickly retreating from the massive room.
The instant she was gone, Gendo immediately dropped the depressed, discouraged front, the anger returning. "Damn it," he swore, softly but vehemently.
"We should destroy Adam and Lilith," Fuyutski spoke up quietly.
"What?" Gendo demanded sharply.
"The scenario's ruined," Fuyutski said. "Rei's not going to fulfill her part in it, unless stuttering has become a normal thing for her while I wasn't paying attention. With no replacement…Ikari, the best we can do at this point is to see to it that SEELE's scenario fails as well."
"The scenario is not ruined," Gendo said with a voice that could freeze lava. "It has been dealt a setback. That's all."
Before the old professor could make any kind of reply, Gendo got up and began heading for the door.
"Order Section Two to keep a closer eye of the First Child from now on," he said as he went. "I don't want the secret service to lose track of her for even an instant."
The Vice Commander sighed as Gendo departed, leaving him alone in the grim office. Do you really think you can make Rei obedient again in the time left, Ikari? He wondered as he got on the phone to relay Gendo's orders.
"It just doesn't seem right," Hikari said softly.
"Yeah," Shinji agreed.
The two were visiting Asuka, who had shown no change since the battle against the Sixteenth Angel.
Hikari had known that going into the Geofront to see her friend wasn't the wisest of ideas, not with Adam down there, but when Shinji had offered to take her with him that day to Asuka's room, she didn't feel like she could refuse.
She was already starting to regret not making up some excuse, however. The call of Adam was nearly deafening so close to the First Angel, to the point Hikari was having difficulty thinking straight.
Yet even the All-Father's siren song couldn't mute the quiet horror she felt looking at Asuka in her current state. If seeing the Second Child all but begging to spend the night at her place had been wrong, seeing her laying motionless was practically blasphemous. She just looked so tiny and frail in that bed, and Asuka wasn't supposed to look like that. The pilot of EVA Unit Two was supposed to be larger than life, and full of fire.
God, did everyone buy into the image she tried to project or was it just me who fell for it? Hikari wondered.
She suddenly realized that Shinji was saying something, but she couldn't seem to focus on it. It was almost like she couldn't hear Shinji or Adam, except that Adam produced no sound she could detect with her ears.
"What? Sorry…I was lost in thought," she said once the moment had passed.
"I said I tried to put her A-10 clips in, so she'd look more like herself," Shinji said, "but the nurses wouldn't let me."
Hikari nodded. "Is she ever responsive at all?" she asked.
"Sorta," Shinji answered softly. "She does anything she's told, so at least she's been spared certain, uh, indignities, but…"
The door opened before Shinji could find the words for what he wanted to say, and Rei entered. "Hello," she said softly.
They greeted Rei, and the First Child pulled up a chair and sat with them. Hikari thought that Rei looked pale…then remembered that Rei always looked pale, cursed the call of Adam again, and realized that Rei looked more than pale. She had a grayish, unhealthy tint. Not that Rei had been looking so great recently, but this was a new low.
"Are you all right?" she asked.
"Fine," Rei answered.
They lapsed into silence for several seconds. Trying to distract herself from the call of Adam, Hikari allowed her eyes to wander about the room. Her gaze soon settled upon a small Get Well Soon card laying on Asuka's bedside table, which she picked up and opened.
"Toji sent this?" she asked with a slight, confused frown as she read the signature.
A small grin formed on Shinji's face. "Yeah. He and Asuka don't get along at all, if you didn't know. He's been calling her the red devil for a while now, but even he wouldn't have wished this on her," he explained. "I think he felt guilty about openly disliking her so much after…this happened."
Hikari couldn't help but smile at this new display of Toji's compassionate side.
"His guilt was misplaced," Rei said. "I think she actually enjoyed his dislike and the verbal sparring that came with it."
"That sounds like Asuka," Hikari said, the corners of her lips quirking upwards.
An orderly suddenly appeared at the door, cutting off any further conversation. "Time's up," he announced.
The three visitors nodded and made their way out of the Medical Ward. "Sorry," Shinji said as they stepped into an elevator. "Visiting hours aren't over yet, but security gets paranoid when people who aren't NERV personnel are around."
"It's all right," Hikari said. "I understand. So, the Fifth Child's been found, hasn't he?"
"Yeah," Shinji said. "His name is—"
"Kaworu Nagisa," Hikari finished.
Shinji frowned. "How did you know?"
Hikari smiled slightly. "He's been added to the class 2-A attendance sheet, since he's starting school Monday," she explained. "I figured it had to be him. I'm not hacking into the MAGI in my spare time or anything."
"Oh," Shinji said, looking a bit embarrassed.
The elevator reached their desired floor and opened with a ping. Shinji and Rei led Hikari to the parking deck and managed to get a Section Two car to take her home. Once their friend was off, the two EVA pilots headed back into headquarters.
Meanwhile, out by the shore of Lake Ashi, a boy with gray hair and red eyes sat upon a large rock, looking out at the blue water, humming Beethoven's Ninth Symphony. He looked behind himself but saw nothing.
Kaworu sighed. Shinji was supposed to have arrived, but the Third Child had never made an appearance.
"That which was preordained is not coming to pass," he mused aloud.
He supposed that he shouldn't be surprised; the signs that destiny was failing were all around him. Indeed, Tokyo-3 should have been a Golgotha at this point, ruined and broken as a city and all but shattered as a fortress, with the vaporized bones of countless lilin swirling through the air as so much dust.
Yet while the city clearly bore the scars of battle, it was still very much alive. So much so that Kaworu would have the unanticipated opportunity to attend what the lilin referred to as "school."
"Perhaps my stay here will be even more interesting than I had envisioned," he said to himself, getting off the rock.
Kaworu Nagisa walked off, hands in his pockets. His perpetual smile widened as he made his way back to the city, and he began to sing, the music causing his heart to swell.
"Well mine have seen the coming of the glory of the Lord! He hath loosened fateful lightning from His terrible swift sword! Glory! Glory! Hallelujah! Glory! Glory! Hallelujah! His truth is marching on!"
"Excuse me, are you the representative for this class?"
Hikari looked up and found herself staring in a pair of red eyes that did not belong to Rei Ayanami. Instead, a slim boy with gray hair and pale skin stood before her desk, smiling down at her.
"Yes, that's me," Hikari answered. "I'm Hikari Horaki. You must be Kaworu Nagisa. Welcome to class 2-A."
"Thank you, Hikari-chan," Kaworu said brightly.
His choice of honorifics caused Hikari to arch an eyebrow, but she decided against telling him off for it. Maybe he just isn't very familiar with Japanese yet, she mused. He certainly doesn't look like he's from this country.
The problem was that he didn't look like he was from any country really, not with his unusual features. He looked like…
Like Ayanami…and like me when I'm being Spirit, Hikari thought.
"Excuse me," Kaworu spoke up, still smiling. "I asked you where I should sit. Or am I allowed to choose?"
Silently chastising herself for zoning out, Hikari directed her attention back to the new student. "Why don't you have a seat over there?" she asked, gesturing to a vacant desk.
Kaworu looked to the seat she indicated, and then his eyes darted over to Shinji, who was at the other side of the room. His smile wavered noticeably, but he complied, heading over to his assigned desk.
Hikari's eyes narrowed as she watched him take his seat, sensing…something. Just the barest little twinge of her Angel senses.
He's not a normal human, she thought.
While she had no doubt about this, Hikari didn't know what, if anything, she should do about it. After all, she'd been sensing similar faint twinges around Rei ever since the battle against the Thirteenth Angel, and Hikari had no fear that Rei would betray humanity. It would certainly explain the Fifth Child's strange features and somewhat eccentric behavior if he was essentially the male version of Rei. Still…
I'll have to keep an eye on him, Hikari decided, just as Sensei walked in.
"Stand! Bow! Sit!"
The Fifth Child seemed determined to show all the remaining students of class 2-A how odd he was that morning, and overall he succeeded brilliantly. Nagisa obviously lacked even the most rudimentary grip of classroom protocol, which he demonstrated when he randomly began to sing in class, tried to say hello to the other pilots from across the room in the middle of Sensei's lectures, and at one point attempted to get up and leave the classroom without a word.
Of course, Hikari had little choice but to punish Kaworu for his impudence, and the Fifth Child was sentenced to having hold up buckets of water out in the hallway until lunch. Judging by his soft chuckles and the comments he made to himself, Nagisa appeared to find this very amusing.
At last, lunch break arrived, and Hikari and her friends assembled at their usual table in the schoolyard to eat. Shinji, she noticed, was looking around, as though searching for something.
"Lost something, Shin-man?" Toji asked before Hikari could comment.
"No," he answered. "I was just looking for Nagisa. I figured we should invite him to eat with us, since we're going to be working with him and everything."
"Perhaps he is still in the hallway with the buckets," Rei suggested.
Toji opened his mouth to dismiss the notion that Kaworu would continue enduring his punishment after he didn't have to anymore, but then the jock hesitated. "Actually, that might just be where he is."
Hikari sighed. "I'll go check. Be right back."
The class rep got up and headed back toward the building.
"Man, that Nagisa guy is so weird," Toji commented quietly as she walked off.
"Yeah," Kensuke agreed. "Seems like only weirdos can pilot EVA."
"What do you mean by that?!" Toji barked indignantly.
Hikari missed this loud outburst from crush, as she had already made it back into the hallway just outside classroom 2-A. She wasn't entirely surprised to find that Kaworu was indeed still holding the buckets, that smile still plastered on his face even as his legs shook with obvious weariness.
"Nagisa, you can put those down now," Hikari said. "It's the lunch period."
"I see," Kaworu grunted, setting the buckets down. "Thank you for telling me, Hikari-chan."
Hikari winced slightly. "Could you stop calling me '-chan' please? People will talk if you keep it up."
Kaworu frowned slightly, looking confused, but he readily agreed. "Very well."
"Thank you," Hikari said.
An awkward silence followed. Hikari cleared her throat after it dragged on for a few seconds. "Well, we should probably head into the yard," she said.
"You are like me."
"What?" Hikari asked, finding herself suddenly caught by his probing red gaze.
Kaworu's grin widened. "You are like me," he repeated. "And yet you are not like me as well. You are fortunate enough to possess a combination of gifts that I had believed impossible. How fascinating."
"Are you going to tell anyone?" Hikari asked softly.
"Do you want me to?"
"No."
Kaworu shrugged, as if to say that it didn't really matter much to him. "Then I shall honor your wish, half-sister."
And with that, he walked off, leaving Hikari standing in the hall, feeling stupefied. Half-sister…why does being called that ring a bell? She wondered.
"This is incredible," Ritsuko breathed, as she looked over Maya's shoulder at the readout on the techie's terminal. "Are you sure this is correct?"
"I'm positive, sempai," Maya said, though she sounded just as stunned as the faux blonde.
"But this should be impossible," Ritsuko said.
"What?" Misato asked, coming up behind Ritsuko.
"These readings," Ritsuko answered, looking up and gazing out at the tubes that contained the test plugs. "The Fifth Child has the highest sync ratio, and we haven't even reconfigured Unit Two's core for him yet."
"What does it mean?" Misato asked.
It means that he's probably the Seventeenth Angel, Ritsuko thought.
"I don't know," Ritsuko said.
Misato scowled, feeling certain that the scientist was lying to her again. Without a word, she turned and stormed out of the control room.
Maya gave Ritsuko a questioning look, and Ritsuko sighed. "Take over for me, please," she commanded her protégé, heading after the Operations Director.
She caught up to the violet haired woman in the hallway. "Misato—"
"I don't want to hear it, Rits," Misato cut her off. "You're just going to lie to me anyway."
"Why do you think that?" Ritsuko asked.
Misato gave her an incredulous look. "Well, you never did tell me the truth about my first pilot, for one," she scowled.
"Is this what this is all about?" Ritsuko asked.
"Not all of it," Misato growled.
"I didn't do anything!" Ritsuko protested.
Misato's fists clenched. "I know that was only because Rei beat you to it. I'm not an idiot, Ritsuko."
Knowing she couldn't deny that she had planned to destroy the Rei clones with any sincerity, Ritsuko decided to take a different tact. "You don't seem to be angry at Rei about this incident," she said, sounding more sullen than she had expected. "And Rei was the one who actually pushed the button."
"Rei believed she would die if she didn't do it!" Misato snapped. "And for all I know, she could very well be right! Besides, at least Rei didn't think it was funny!"
"Whatever," Ritsuko grumbled, shaking her head. "I don't understand what more you want from me, Misato."
"I know there are more secrets in this place, Rits," Misato said darkly. "It's to be expected, in a place like this, but some of them are real whoppers. I have no doubt of that. Now are you going to tell me, or—"
"Don't go digging, Misato," Akagi warned. "You'll end up like Kaji if you do."
Misato eyes widened and her hand lashed out without her even thinking about it. The sound of her palm smacking Ritsuko's cheek echoed in the confined hallway. "Don't you mention him!" she spat.
"Fine," Ritsuko grumbled, turning and heading back to the control room.
Later that day, Kaworu emerged from the research and technical section of headquarters, finished with his tests for the day. His omnipresent smile faded when he entered the hallway that would take him back to the base proper, finding no one waiting for him.
Not at all like it's supposed to happen, he mused.
The next day after school, the group headed down to the mall together to hang out. Well, most of the group did, anyway. Asuka, of course, was still in NERV Medical, and Rei opted not to go. She told the others that she had homework she had been neglecting and had to see to, but Hikari felt fairly certain it was because Rei disliked the Fifth Child. Rei had told Hikari as much the other day, confessing that Kaworu's presence made her deeply uncomfortable for reasons she couldn't explain.
Hikari might have tried to cajole Rei into going, but in truth, she understood the First Child's discomfort. She herself might not have gone, if not for the fact that she was reluctant to leave the other boys alone with Kaworu.
At the moment, however, Hikari was concentrating on significantly less dour matters.
"Aw, man!" Kensuke exclaimed, bringing his fist down on the controls of one of a large arcade game in frustration. "She beat me again! I don't believe it! I thought girls were supposed to stink at video games!"
Hikari responded by laughing and then sticking her tongue out at the otaku, enjoying her victory.
"Well, Hikari is better at video games than most girls," Toji smirked, "but the fact that you stink at them probably isn't hurting, either."
Kensuke just groaned and got out of the machine. "You want next game, Nagisa?" he asked.
Kaworu looked at the game with a bemused expression. "I hope you'll excuse me, but what is the purpose of this activity?"
He really is just like a male Rei, Hikari thought. So why do I find him so damn creepy?
Shinji blinked in confusion. "Uh, it's supposed to be fun."
Kaworu's ubiquitous smile widened. "I see. In that case, I'd be pleased to try it," he said gamely, taking the seat Kensuke had just vacated.
Then everyone waited for several seconds.
"Uh, Nagisa, you do know that you're supposed to put money into the machine, right?" Toji asked.
"No, I hadn't realized that," Kaworu said mildly. "And unfortunately I don't have any money with me."
The other four teenagers sweat dropped. "You went to a mall…with no money?" Kensuke asked slowly.
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
Hikari just sighed and leaned over, inserting two coins into the slot in front of Kaworu, before during the same thing with her game and selecting "VS battle."
"It's a fighting game," Hikari explained. "You pick a giant robot and we try and knock out the other person's robot."
"I see," Kaworu said as he browsed his potential options. "You lilin glorify simulated violence, even though abhorring real violence is seen as a virtue among you. Curious."
Hikari frowned. Lilin. Why does it feel like I've heard that word before?
However, before she could ask him and before one of the boys could inquire about the strange comment, Kaworu chose his robot, a recent addition to the game: Unit Two.
A very uncomfortable silence fell at this reminder of the fact that Kaworu had replaced Asuka as the pilot of the first production model Evangelion. Kaworu seemed cheerfully oblivious to to the uncomfortable atmosphere he'd created. Seeking to break the tension, Hikari quickly selected Nobel Gundam as her robot and started the fight.
Nagisa was terrible. He had no idea what he was doing and just hit buttons randomly. That could actually work fairly well with this particular game, but he did so at a very sedate pace, rather than with the frantic speed employed by the common button masher.
Hikari tried to go easy on him, she really did, but when it became clear that Kaworu wasn't going to put up any kind of decent fight, she decided to just finish him quickly. Deftly pressing the little known combination of buttons that would make Nobel Gundam go berserk, the class rep then sat back and watched while her girly Gundam tore apart Unit Two.
"Well, that was quite interesting," Kaworu commented once it was over, not the least bit deflated by his defeat. "Who shall challenge Hikari-san next?"
"Actually, it's getting late," Shinji said, looking at his watch. "We should probably head home."
"Yeah," Toji agreed. "I've spent too much already, anyway."
The group headed to a nearby train station and were soon homeward bound, getting off one by one. Hikari was just a little disturbed when she realized that Shinji and Kaworu would be the last two to disembark from the train.
"Are you all right, Shinji-kun?" Kaworu asked Shinji a few minutes after Hikari had left the train.
"Huh?" Shinji asked, looking up.
"You seemed to have grown sad while we've ridden," Kaworu explained, still smiling. "I was wondering what was troubling you."
Shinji's lips quirked upwards slightly in amusement. The Fifth Child certainly was an odd one, but he was amicable enough. His tiny smile faded when he thought about the answer to Kaworu's question, though.
"I don't want to go home," he confessed.
"That you have a home to go to is a good fact," Kaworu said. "This will bring you joy."
It used to, Shinji thought. The Katsuragi apartment had become a rather grim place as of late, with Asuka's conspicuous absence and Misato shutting herself up in her room almost constantly. Even Pen-Pen seemed to have been affected by the morose atmosphere in the place and rarely left his fridge.
"It's too quiet there lately," Shinji said softly.
The irony would have been amusing under different circumstances. After all, how many times had he wished for a little quiet? Quiet in which he could play his cello in. Quiet in which he could do his homework in. Quiet in which he could listen to his SDAT player in. Quiet in which he could simply relax. Yet now that the chaos and noise that had characterized his living space were gone, he found he missed them terribly.
Hell, he would gladly give up his SDAT player just to hear Asuka demand he cook lasagna instead of Japanese food for dinner at this point.
"If you wish, you could spend the night in my room in the Geofront," Kaworu offered.
"Sure," Shinji said after a few seconds of consideration. "Arigato."
The room in the Geofront that Kaworu had been assigned to was strictly utilitarian in appearance and very cramped; Kaworu's bed and Shinji's futon took up nearly every last bit of floor space. It was, Shinji mused, a rather depressing place to live.
You would have been living in a room like this for months if Misato hadn't taken you in, a voice in his mind whispered and he winced at the thought of his guardian all alone in that big apartment.
"Are you comfortable, Shinji-kun?" Kaworu asked.
"I'm fine," Shinji replied.
"I still feel as though I should be the one on the floor," Kaworu said mildly.
"No," Shinji insisted. "I'm the guest. I'll sleep on the floor."
Silence reigned for a few moments in the room until Kaworu decided to prompt Shinji into speaking. "What do you want to say?" he asked. "There's something you want to tell me."
Shinji sighed. "I'm tired."
Kaworu blinked. This wasn't what he'd expected at all. Then again, he supposed he shouldn't be surprised by the unexpected at this point. "Then why don't you sleep?" he asked.
Shinji actually snickered softly at that. "Not like that. I'm tired of piloting EVA, of having the whole world depend on me and watching my friends risk their lives with me."
"Then why don't you stop?" Kaworu asked. "I'm sure they can find a replacement pilot for Unit One, and humanity does have some unexpected champions in addition to the Evangelions."
Just like they found one for Unit Two, Shinji thought darkly before squelching his resentment. It wasn't Kaworu's fault that Asuka was in a near catatonic state, after all.
"I can't just stop," Shinji said. "People could die if I quit and NERV had to put an inexperienced pilot in Unit One. My friends, the new pilot, innocent people in the city…and it would all be my fault."
"You lilin are so interesting," Kaworu commented. "You have such difficulty getting along with others, yet some of you will fight so hard and endure so much pain to protect others."
With a small frown of confusion, Shinji turned toward Kaworu and was surprised to see that the Fifth Child was looking at him.
"I may have been born just to meet you," Kaworu commented.
"I still don't get why this guy creeps you out so much," Nozomi commented while she walked home from school with Hikari the next day.
Hikari sighed. "It's difficult to put into words," she said. "If you met him, I think you might understand."
Nozomi just shrugged in response, and Hikari sighed softly, wondering why she'd tried to talk to her younger sister about this.
Actually, I know why, Hikari thought. Asuka's practically in a coma, Rei doesn't want to talk about Kaworu at all, Shinji likes the guy, and Kodama's been studying for exams all the time lately.
"Hey, look!" Nozomi exclaimed suddenly, pointing.
Hikari looked and saw that a previously deserted building had been converted into a costume shop. It wasn't terribly surprising; Tokyo-3 was rapidly becoming the cosplaying capital of Japan, thanks to the number of…colorful figures in the city, including Spirit. Not even the Angel attacks could keep the otaku groups away from the place.
One of the mannequins in the window was dressed as Spirit, in fact, though Hikari noticed with annoyance that the costume would be far too large for her, and in more ways than one. The other one was wearing a white and gold costume just like the one she had worn the very first time she'd gone out as Spirit.
It was funny how the human mind worked sometimes. Memories could be sparked by the smallest or strangest association. A scent, a sound, a familiar sight, any of them could unearth a buried memory. Hikari lay eyes on the mask that the mannequin wore, and her eyes widened.
Her alter ego was about two meters away from her, standing knee-deep in the amber liquid and wearing her usual school uniform. A mask was on her face, but it wasn't the red one that Spirit herself wore. It looked like the gold one that she'd pilfered from Kodama and worn during her first outing.
"Who're you?" Spirit demanded.
Hikari smiled, and Spirit shivered at the sight. She didn't know she was capable of looking that sinister. "I'm you."
"No, you're not!" Spirit snapped. "I'm me!"
Hikari apparently found this assertion amusing, as her smile widened. Somehow, it didn't make her look the slightest bit more pleasant, just the opposite, in fact.
A grainy, fragmented memory suddenly came to her. She remembered that she had been fighting an Angel and had landed on its back for…some reason, just before it had captured and then covered her in some kind of ooze.
"You're an Angel, aren't you?" Spirit asked.
Hikari threw back her head and laughed. "Clever lilin! There's no fooling you, is there?" she asked. "Yes, I am one of the beings your kind calls the Angels."
"Don't you see that this is a wretched state of affairs?" the Angel asked. "Your entire species lives in similar misery, but you and I can end all this, half-sister. We can end it right now."
"Half-sister?"
"Yes," the Angel nodded. "Though you are a daughter of Lilith, you have been blessed with the power of Adam. Together we can end the world of the AT field."
"Oh god," Hikari breathed.
"What?" Nozomi asked.
"We need to get home, now," Hikari said. "Come on!"
She broke out in a run for the train station, with Nozomi close behind her. "What's wrong?" the youngest Horaki asked.
"Angel," was Hikari's only reply.
Nozomi didn't question her any more after that, and the two girls made it back home in record time. Hikari rushed straight up to her room and began to dial Shinji's cell phone even as she worked on changing out of her school uniform and into her costume, nearly falling to the floor in her haste.
"Hai, moshi moshi," Shinji answered after two rings, flooding her with relief. She wasn't too late!
"Hi, Shinji," Hikari greeted, trying to sound normal. "Hey, do you know where Nagisa is right now?"
Please don't say NERV, Hikari added silently.
"Kaworu? I think he mentioned something about going down to Lake Ashi. Why?" Shinji replied.
"Nothing important," Hikari lied. "He just forgot something at school, and I wanted to return it to him. Well, gotta go. Bye."
She hung up before he could make a reply and tossed her cell phone onto her bed, then quickly finished changing into her costume. Hikari was in such a rush that she almost forgot to undo her pig-tails before she headed toward her window. She poked her head out carefully, searching for anyone who might be looking. Fortunately, her room didn't face the street and was even fairly well concealed by nearby trees, so she only had to check a few places for potential witnesses.
Seeing no one, Hikari took a breath and then whispered, "I have wings."
Kaworu Nagisa stood at the far shore of Lake Ashi, looking out at the city on the other side of it. Truly, he mused, the lilin culture was fascinating, both beautiful and full of contradictions that the children of Lilith were blind to. He decided he liked it.
He looked up as he sensed the approach of one of his "siblings," and he smiled even as jealousy shot through him. He wondered if the winged girl had any idea how fortunate she was to possess the power of choice.
If I had that power…
He cut off that line of thought, knowing it ultimately went nowhere, since he would never have the Fruit of Knowledge.
The winged girl landed nearby a moment later. "Hello, Nagisa," she said, glaring at him with eyes that were now as red as his.
"Hello, Hikari-san," he replied. "Or should I refer to you as Spirit now?"
Her glare intensified by an order of magnitude. "Spirit," she answered. "You're an Angel, aren't you? Not a half Angel or anything, but a real one."
Kaworu looked out at the blue water of Lake Ashi. "Yes," he answered. "I am the last of Adam's children, the final Messenger."
Spirit scowled darkly. "So when were you planning on showing everyone your true colors and trying to get to Adam?" she demanded. "Were you trying to get Toji and Rei to be your friends first, too?"
"No," Kaworu answered. "Shinji-kun is the only lilin that interests me. Do you intend to kill me?"
His inquiry as to whether or not she had murderous intentions toward him was asked in a voice as calm and level as the blue lake before them. For some reason, this infuriated Spirit.
"Yes," she growled.
He chuckled, further irritating her. "Truly? I know you had little difficulty slaughtering my siblings, but they appeared alien to you. I, on the other hand, appear to be a lilin. And the children of Lilith do place so much value upon appearances."
Spirit grimaced at the way he referred to the other Angels as his siblings, thinking of Kodama and Nozomi. She wondered if he felt the kind of connection to his Angels that she felt with her sisters.
Probably not, Spirit decided. If someone had killed her sisters she'd be utterly furious as well as distraught, even if it was done out of self defense. But Kaworu spoke of the deaths of the other Angels in a decidedly calm, matter-of-fact tone. It made pressing forward with what she knew she had to do easier, though it did not dispel the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"I don't want to kill you," Spirit said, her voice trembling as she made that admission, "but I will, because I can't let you hurt my friends. Besides, even though you look human, I know you're really an Angel."
Kaworu's grin just widened. "You lilin can be so defensive of one another. I guess it's only natural for such a fragile species to evolve that way."
"Are you going to do a running commentary on humanity all day, or are you going to fight me?" Spirit asked.
She didn't want to admit it to him, but she wasn't sure she could attack him if he didn't fight back. It would make her feel like a murderer, rather than someone who working to destroy an incredibly dangerous monster in human form that would destroy mankind.
"Neither," Kaworu answered. "You are going to leave here."
"Sorry, Nagisa, but that's not going to happen," Spirit said, crossing her arms.
"Oh, but it is," he replied. "Come here."
Spirit suddenly felt her body moving to obey his command, her legs trying to walk closer to him. She cried out in alarm as she fought, trying to regain control of herself and succeeding only in making herself stagger clumsily toward him instead of just striding over.
"What the hell?" she demanded, suddenly feeling cold with fear. "How are you doing this to me?!"
"The gift you received from Bardiel is something of a double-edged sword," Kaworu explained. "It allows me to control you much as he controlled Evangelion Unit Three."
A double-edged sword? From where I'm standing, it only ever had one edge. Pity it only cuts me! Spirit thought as she struggled fruitlessly against the Seventeenth Angel's hold on her.
"There is little need to worry, however," Kaworu continued once she was within arm's length of him. "Besides myself, there is really no one else with the power to take advantage of this weakness. Adam is the only other being on this Earth who could do so, and he would need to be restored to his full glory, first. And if the All-Father is restored, then his ability to control you will be the least of your worries."
"I'm more worried about what you're going to do to me," Spirit growled.
Kaworu didn't immediately make a reply, instead walking around her in a slow circle. Spirit grit her teeth and struggled desperately against his unseen hold on her, but she couldn't move. Her body stood stubbornly at attention; she couldn't even move her hand enough to try and line up a cross blast.
"I don't plan on doing much of anything with you," Kaworu said at last. "I just need you to stay out of my way."
"I won't," Spirit said defiantly.
"I'm afraid you don't have much of a choice," he responded.
Tabris raised his right hand, his index and middle fingers extended, slowly bringing them towards Spirit's head. The winged girl struggled furiously against her invisible bonds, not sure what he was about to do to her but certain she wouldn't like it. However, he commanded the part of the Thirteenth Angel that was inside of her to hold her fast, and she couldn't make any significant movements. Tears of frustration formed in her eyes as he drew closer.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity to Spirit, his fingers touched the skin of forehead…then phased smoothly through it.
Her eyes widened hugely and she released a strangled gasp as her mind went crazy, sounds and images swirling through it far, far too fast for her to comprehend. For several seconds, the winged girl lost all sense of time and even all sense of self, knowing nothing but the flurry of thoughts exploding in her brain.
Then Tabris pulled his fingers out of her mind, and Spirit promptly collapsed to the ground. The Seventeenth Angel then stood there and watched her, waiting for her to awaken.
He didn't have to wait long. Spirit woke only seconds after she'd collapsed, quickly getting to her feet. The half-Angel looked around without seeing him, a confusion expression on her feet. After a few moments, she shrugged and took to the air.
Kaworu watched her fly off, glad that he had been able to spare her. He knew that if he failed to win his object, his "half-sister" would be the final hope for any kind of continued existence for the children of Adam.
With a small sigh, Kaworu began to trek back to the city, knowing that the clock was now ticking. The minds of beings with the Fruit of Knowledge were impossible for even an Angel of his power to befuddle for more than a period, after all.
"The red/blue pattern was definitely there," Makoto said slowly as he studied his screen. "The MAGI recorded it as having been in the area by Lake Ashi for several minutes, but we don't have any idea why Spirit would be there. We didn't pick up any signs of an Angel."
"Keep an eye on that area, anyway," Misato ordered. "Spirit's almost never made an appearance for no reason."
"Will do, Major," Makoto said. "She's been off our scopes for over an hour now, though. I doubt anything will—"
The bespectacled tech was suddenly cut off when klaxons began blaring all through out the command center.
"You just had to say it and jinx us, didn't you?" Aoba grumbled.
"What's happening?" Misato demanded, ignoring the long haired man.
"AT field detected!" Makoto answered.
"It's coming from inside the EVA cages!" Maya added, looking down at her terminal in alarm. "Units Zero and Three have been damaged! They're both inoperable!"
"The pattern is blue!" Aoba said. "There's an Angel inside NERV!"
"What?!" Misato exclaimed in horror.
"Well, I can't put this off any longer," Tabris commented as he stood before Unit Two. "Awaken, Adam's dark shadow and servant of the lilin!"
The first production model raised its head, its four eyes burning with a demonic red light.
"Unit Two's been activated!" Aoba reported, typing at his keyboard at a frantic pace as he worked to figure out exactly what was happening.
"Where's Asuka?" Misato demanded.
"She's still in room 303," Makoto replied. "It's confirmed. There's no entry plug in Unit Two!"
"Damn it. Unit One's status?" Misato asked.
"Undamaged," Maya replied, a note of confusion in her voice. "The Angel never touched it."
Misato's eyes narrowed. The only reason for the Angel to spare Unit One was if it wanted to fight Shinji, and a good commander never gave the enemy the fight they wanted if she could avoid it.
Unfortunately, she couldn't avoid it.
"Get Shinji here and send Unit One in pursuit as soon as possible!" Misato ordered.
Shinji felt sick as he saw the crimson figure of Unit Two coming into view. He hadn't wanted to believe that it was true, but now as Unit One plunged down the huge shaft after its fellow EVA, it was impossible to deny any longer.
Kaworu was the Seventeenth Angel.
"Kaworu! Why are you doing this!" Shinji exclaimed. "I thought you were my friend!"
Tabris just looked up and smiled cryptically at the purple war machine. Unit One reached out for the Angel, but was quickly intercepted by Unit Two, and the two titans began to grapple, allies turned enemies.
"Sorry, Asuka," Shinji grunted, commanding Unit One's left shoulder pylon to open, revealing its progressive knife.
At the same instant, Unit Two's shoulder pylon opened as well. Moving in near perfect synch, the two Evangelions drew their weapons and attacked, the knives connecting with each other with a ring of metal and a shower of orange sparks.
"Kaworu, I don't understand!" Shinji demanded.
"I am made from the same flesh as EVA," Tabris explained. "The flesh of Adam. That allows me to sync with it easily so long as there's no soul within it stopping me, and the soul within Unit Two has gone to sleep."
"No! I wasn't asking how you're doing this! I want to know why!" Shinji barked.
"Why? It is because I am of Adam," Tabris explained, looking surprised by the question. "Those born of Adam must return to Adam."
"Spirit hasn't tried to get to Adam!" Shinji snapped. "She's part Angel, and she's been here a lot longer than you have!"
Tabris laughed. "Ah, her. Well, she possesses gifts I never could. Truly she is blessed."
Unit One's progressive knife slipped off of Unit Two's, suddenly flying toward Tabris. Shinji's eyes widened, thinking it was going to be over right then.
Then the prog knife slammed into a solid wall of orange light. "An AT field?" Shinji gasped.
"Yes, that is what you lilin call this thing," Tabris said. "It is the sacred wall around my soul which no one must ever intrude upon!"
"What?" Shinji asked, confused.
The Seventeenth Angel's cryptic comments made Shinji take his attention of Unit Two for too long, unfortunately, and the red EVA slammed its progressive knife into Unit One's chest. Shinji screamed as he felt the sympathetic pain from EVA and slammed his own knife into Unit Two's neck.
Seconds later, the two Evangelions landed in the lake of LCL that existed in the most forbidden and dangerous part of NERV headquarters, sending up a massive splash. Shinji looked up to see Tabris floating lazily toward a massive door and tried to pursue him, only to be stopped by Unit Two grabbing hold of his EVA's ankle.
He almost expected Spirit to show up at this point to bail him out again, but he knew better than to believe the winged girl would appear within the bowels of NERV.
"I am getting so god damn sick of this crap!" Shinji screamed as he began to wrestle with Unit Two.
With a cry of fury and pain, the Third Child ripped the progressive knife that was inside his own EVA's chest out and plunged it into Unit Two's head. The scarlet EVA collapsed into the lack of amber liquid and was still.
The massive door had opened by this point, and Tabris now hovered in front of a massive, white figure that was crucified upon a huge red cross. Shinji didn't waste time wondering what it was. Instead, he reached out and grabbed the Seventeenth Angel, holding him in Unit One's fist.
"Thank you, Shinji-kun," Tabris spoke. "I'm glad that you've beaten Unit Two."
This statement so surprised Shinji that he nearly released Tabris, all the maniac rage of a moment ago quickly withering away.
"Otherwise, I might have united with her," Tabris continued, gesturing toward the figure on the cross.
"Kaworu…can't you stop this?" Shinji pleaded.
"I cannot," Tabris answered sadly but firmly. "I am destined to live forever, even if humanity is annihilated as a result. I can die, however. Indeed, death would be the only true freedom for me."
"Kaworu, this isn't necessary," Shinji said, though he sounded more like he was begging than making a statement.
"I'm afraid it is," Tabris replied, glancing up at the girl who was glaring down at him and neutralizing his AT field. "Now please, end me."
Shinji stared at Tabris for an incredibly long moment, considering everything that the being he held in Unit One's fist was. He was an Angel, one of the beings that he had sworn to fight, a potential herald of Armageddon. His siblings had almost killed him, Toji, and Rei. His siblings had reduced Asuka to a mere shadow of her former self.
But he was almost Shinji's friend.
Shinji squeezed his eyes shut and tightened Unit One's fist. He tried not to vomit when he heard something fall into the LCL below with a splash.
"Kaworu-kun was my friend," Shinji said, his eyes liquid. "I didn't want to kill him. I didn't."
"He left you no choice," Rei said softly.
"If you'd let him live, everyone else would have died," Hikari agreed.
Their words didn't seem to have much effect on the boy, who looked inconsolably miserable. Hikari felt her gut twist with shame. She'd remembered her encounter with Kaworu at the lake the moment the Seventeenth Angel had spread his AT field inside NERV headquarters.
I failed, she thought sadly, and he doesn't even know and I can't even apologize to him for it. I should have called Rei and told her. And I should have remembered what really happened sooner. I knew something wasn't adding up when I thought I'd gone on a flight just for fun and Nozomi asked about an Angel when I got home.
"He was my friend," Shinji said, causing Hikari to cease berating herself for the moment and focus on him again. "I shouldn't have killed him."
"Shinji, you shouldn't have had to kill him, but if you hadn't, everyone else would have died," Hikari said, more firmly this time, hoping to get the message through to him. "Rei, Asuka, Misato, Toji, Kensuke, me…we all would have died if you hadn't killed Kaworu. I know it hurts, but you did the right thing."
"It's true," Shinji conceded, "but…"
Hikari embraced him before Shinji could figure out how to continue, and the Third Child gripped onto her like a drowning man would grip onto a rope. Rei also wrapped her arms around Shinji, and they remained that way for a long time.
Author's Notes: This chapter was really hard. I admit that, unlike many of the Angels, I didn't really have a plan for what I was going to do about Kaworu when I sat down to write this. I didn't want anybody to have to kill the guy, but somebody had to.
Part of me really wanted to have this epic clash between Spirit and Kaworu, but there were all kinds of problems with that. Apparently only Rei is capable of neutralizing Kaworu's AT field, and then there's the fact that Kaworu's means of attack was to control Unit Two. Since he's already inside NERV when he does this, there's not much Spirit can do at that point. The only way around that would be for me to make up a bunch of new powers for Kaworu to use in combat, and I didn't really want to do that. In the end, it just seemed to make more sense for things to go similarly to how they did in the show.
Anyway, I did try to lessen the blow. Shinji's not as close to Kaworu this time around, and the scene where Kaworu tells him that he loves him has been removed. He also has a shoulder to cry on this time around.
Next we move on to EoE, which I can assure you will deviate from the canon storyline far more than this chapter did.
Zoro50, I could actually see Shinji and Misato reacting that way. Shinji can forgive a hell of a lot when it comes to the people he cares about, and Misato tends to have a very pragmatic attitude where matters of survival are concerned.
NefCanuck, I think I merged too many other omake plot threads into the one last chapter, since you need to read "Aftermath," which was way back in chapter 7 or 8, as well as the omake from the chapter before the last one for it to make sense. Anyway, Shinji hasn't been dressing up as Asuka; the wig is from the Kenshin costume.
Shinteo-5, I can understand preferring a Shinji/Hikari pairing, but Toji's not Spirit's sidekick. He's basically been the dude in distress character for this fic. Hell, if anybody (outside of the omakes) is Spirit's sidekick, it's Shinji. He has more assists than any other pilot.
Invincible Shinji, I don't know what you expect me to do to make the other authors write faster. You can pester them just as well as I can, though I wouldn't recommend it.
Thanks to all my readers and reviewers.
Omake
You Know You Wanted It
"No," Kaworu answered. "Shinji-kun is the only lilin that interests me. Do you intend to kill me?"
His inquiry as to whether or not she had murderous intentions toward him was asked in a voice as calm and level as the blue lake before them. For some reason, this infuriated Spirit.
"No," Spirit said.
Kaworu's eyes widened in confusion. "Oh," he said. "Well, thank you. In that case…"
"I'm not going to kill you," Spirit broke in, "because I wouldn't enjoy it nearly so much as she would."
"Huh?"
A massive green fist suddenly slammed into Kaworu, sending him flying into the nearby forest. The final Angel collided with a tree and groaned in pain.
"Puny Angel shouldn't have come to Tokyo-3!" She-Hulk roared as she pursued her prey. "Angel should know…that Misato SMASH!"
"Daddy help me!" Kaworu whined just before She-Hulk was on him again.
Spirit stood off by the shore of the lake and watched. Having gone a few rounds with the She-Hulk in the past, she couldn't help but feel a few stabs of sympathy as Misato went to work.
"Ouch," she winced after a particularly hard blow. "That is not supposed to bend that way..."