One month later...
Tony stands outside, it's a beautiful sunny day...Tony's wearing a black suit with a red tie and shades, he looks up into the sky, seagulls fly up above.
Tony sighs..."Listen...I know I haven't visited you much lately, but I have a confession to make. I cheated on you. I'm sorry. But you have to understand, I needed it. You know what I mean? I can't do my job without it. I hope you understand."
Tony takes a step forward.
"Magnum, I'm gonna miss you buddy."
Tony's Ferrari sits smashed to pieces in front of him, surrounded by thousands of other cars.
"Tony!"
Tony quickly turns around, Ziva waves..."I'd like to get married today, please."
"Heh. Yes, of course!"
Tony looks back at his car..."Rest in pieces, Magnum."...He walks over and takes the Ferrari emblem from the hood and slides it into his pocket. The crane arm picks up the car and tosses it into the car crusher.
Tony watches his car being smashed with a painful look on his face.
Tony turns and walks back towards Ziva, who's sitting in the passenger side window of Tony's new car.
"Hey, sweet cheeks."
Ziva smiles..."You made nice with Magnum, yes?"
Tony nods...as Ziva slides back into the passenger seat of Tony's 2006 Cadillac XLR.
Ziva pulls back the slide on her gun..."Heh. I hope you aren't bringing that into the bedroom tonight, dear."
Ziva turns her head, Tony brushes her hair out of her face...she smiles..."Why, don't like the competition?"...She lightly chuckles…She puts away her gun.
"You know, I'm gonna have fun finding where you put that later."
"Naturally."
"Heh."
Tony starts the car and they drive off.
Several hours later…still in the car.
Ziva figits with her dress…"I'm not used to wearing dresses."
"You look amazing."
She smiles…"Really?"
"You look better than me and that's hard to do. Heh."
She shakes her head and lightly laughs…"Maybe you'll get something special tonight in bed, my hairy little butt."
"My butt isn't hairy!"
"I felt it, it's hairy!"…She laughs evilly.
"You will not get laid with that attitude, missy!"
She laughs…"Aww, come on…I like it a bit hairy, keeps my hands warm at night."
"Heh. I wonder if the hotel has HBO."
"HBO?"
"There's a boxing match on tonight."
Ziva scoots closer to Tony…"You'll be too busy tonight to watch boxing, my love."…She grabs his right hand and starts kissing it…she starts sucking on his thumb.
----------
"DiNozzo, watch the damn road."
Tony quickly straightens out the car and Tony coughs.
Gibbs and McGee watch through Tony's sunglasses cam in MTAC.
"Wow, Boss, Ziva's a good actress."
"She's not acting, McGee."
--------
Tony turns his head, Ziva lets go of his hand. He lightly brushes her cheek with the back of his fingers.
"They're still behind you, DiNozzo."
Ziva smiles and her head disappears into Tony's lap.
"Heh."…Tony's zipper is unzipped.
-------------
Gibbs shakes his head…"Turn the audio off now, McGee and I swear to god, if you look down DiNozzo, I'm killing you."
"You got it, Boss. Hey that tickles."…Tony chuckles.
McGee mutes it.
"She's not actually doing that is she? Boss?"
Gibbs chuckles…"What do you think?"
----------
A man and a woman sit in a car right behind Tony and Ziva.
"Is she doing what I think she's doing?"
"Yeah, I like her."
"You would, pig."
He laughs..."It does say in their files they're exhibitionists."
The woman types on her computer...pictures of Tony and Ziva come up on the screen..."Mr. and Mrs. DiNardo. He's a silver spoon child, born in Long Island."
"She's exotic and sexy."
"Shut up."
"She's Israeli."...She pauses..."And they're both illegal weapons dealers."
"Heh. What they're doing right now is probably illegal."
"Get your mind out of the gutter, Simms."
"Oh, cut me some slack...it's not everyday you get to trail a person getting a hummer on the freeway."
She shakes her head..."You're a federal agent, act like it."
"Prude."...under his breath.
"Excuse me."
"Nothin'."
"They should be getting off at the next off ramp."
"Getting off."...He starts laugh.
She sighs.
---------
Kate scans her eye and tries to get into MTAC.
"Special Agent Gibbs, Special Agent Todd is trying to access MTAC."
"McGee, cut the feed."...Gibbs makes a slide slicing motion across his throat.
McGee clicks a button and the video feed goes off.
"Let her in Barb."
The door opens and Kate walks in.
"What's the word on Tony and Ziva, Gibbs?"
"They're heading to the hotel now."
"Good."
"Are you ok with this, Kate?"
Kate looks at McGee..."Why wouldn't I be?"
"Umm. It's just that...ummm."
Gibbs interrupts McGee..."I think what McGee is trying to put nicely is...Tony and Ziva are gonna be intimately close together."
"Oh, I know, he told me...if everything is fine, I'll be going, it being my last day and all."
Gibbs nods as Kate leaves.
"Yeah, but that close, Boss?"
Gibbs sighs..."I sure hope you know what the hell you've gotten yourself into DiNozzo."
-----------
The man and woman sit in their car watching Tony and Ziva...they're now parked outside the Ritz-Carlton.
"Who is this guy!?"
"I know, I feel bad for her...she's been at it for 30 minutes."
"God, I envy him."
She backhands him in the shoulder..."Men suck."
Tony's door opens…"Wait, I think they're done."
"Finally."
They step out of the car and move to the trunk..."Are we staying at the Ritz-Carlton?"
She laughs..."How long have you been with the ATF?"
He shrugs.
She points to the hotel across the street..."I thought so."
----------
The female ATF agent walks into the lobby of the Ritz-Carlton.
Tony and Ziva are at the front desk; he's kissing on her neck..."Jeez, those two are still going at it, hot and heavy."
She holds her finger to her earwig.
"Can we switch?"
She shakes her head..."Weirdo."
The man behind the counter hands the e-card to Tony..."Here's your room key, sir...1407."
"Thanks."...Tony hands the e-card to Ziva, he kisses her passionately, then smacks her on the ass..."I'll be right up, I need to get a few things."
A bellboy walks up to Ziva..."Miss, any luggage?"
"No, not today."...Ziva moves towards the elevator.
The woman follows her, then quickly dart into the bathroom..."Get a room on the 14th floor, Simms."
"You got it, partner."
---------
Ziva stands in the elevator..."Whoever is following us are cops of some kind, Tony. She's blonde woman, all black dress suit, ugly brown sunglasses."
Tony looks up and sees the woman coming out of the bathroom..."Got her...I'll check 'er out, Z."
"15 energy bars and a Diet Coke...Sir, will there be anything else?"...Tony looks at the cashier.
"No, thank you."
"That'll be 17.69, Sir."
"69. Heh."...Tony pulls out a 20..."Keep the change."
Tony grabs the bag and leaves.
----------
Gibbs stands in MTAC..."Turn off Tony's earwig, McGee."
"Boss?"
"Just do it."
McGee clicks a few keys..."Done."
"Officer David?"
Ziva slides the e-card into the lock and opens the door..."Yes?"
"You do know that you and DiNozzo are suppose to pretend to be married, correct?"
She laughs as she closes the door..."Of course, why do you ask?"
"What was that in the car?"
"You wanted us to make it look real, yes?"
"Yes, but it's not suppose to be real, Ziva."
"Gibbs...how do you know it was real? Where you listening? You and McGee there alone listening, yes?"...Ziva laughs.
Gibbs gives McGee the cut it gesture and McGee cuts their connection.
"Boss?"
"Don't look at me, McGee."
--------------
The female ATF agent walks towards the front doors, looking back over her shoulder.
She runs into something and falls.
She looks up from a sitting position and sees Tony.
"I'm so sorry, let me help you up."...Tony slowly takes off his sunglasses and extends his hand, helping her up.
"My apologies."...Tony brushes white specks off her black suit top..."I'm so embarrassed, you must give me your number, so I may pay for your dry cleaning."
"That's quite all right, Sir."
"How rude of me, I'm Anthony DiNardo."...He offers his hand.
She extends her hand and he takes it into his, caressing it gently..."I'm...Lucy McGillicuty."
He runs his hand up and down her left arm as he firmly shakes her hand..."It's an honor, Miss McGillicuty."...Tony lets go, but she continues to hold on.
He chuckles..."It belongs to me, but you may borrow it."
"Oh, I'm sorry."...She quickly lets go.
She looks up at him as he puts his shades back on.
"Y...you're tall."
Tony smirks..."You're beautiful."
She blushes.
"I must be going."
"Oh...yes, of course."
Tony walks past her then stops..."Oh, Miss McGillicuty?"
She doesn't respond.
Tony shrugs and heads towards the elevator.
"You're tall?"
"Shut up, Simms."...She walks towards the front entrance, her head looking back towards Tony...he waves at her, she walks right into a glass door, smacking the side of her face and hitting her chest..."Ow."
"What was that?"
"Shut up, Simms."...As she rubs her face.
-------------
Tony stood in the elevator...he takes a leather bound wallet from his pocket and opened it..."Melissa Ann Davenport, ATF...another one of my favorite alphabet organizations, Boss."
"We're working on it, DiNozzo."
"Hey, Z...did you hear? I met Lucille Balle. Lucy McGillicuty? Ha!"…Tony shrugs.
Ziva doesn't respond..."Zee-vah…where are you, my little Israeli flower?"
The elevator door opens and Tony exits and walks down towards their room.
-------------
A man in his 30s with a buzz cut, wearing a black leather jacket walks away from the front of the Ritz-Carlton and gets into a black towncar.
A large balding black male in his late 40s drives..."What's the word, Pete?"
"You have to change the location...cops all around, they seem legit, though...saw him pickpocket an obvious undercover cop."
"Did you get a picture?"
"Yup."...He taps his American flag pin on his jacket.
"Good."
-------------
Davenport walks into the hotel across the Ritz..."What room, 1411."
She steps into the elevator.
"Next time, you get to carry all this shit upstairs, partner."
"I don't think so, Simms."
The elevator stops and she steps out.
Simms looks through a camera with a zoom lens as Davenport knocks on the door, he moves to the door and opens it.
"Anything happening?"
"Not yet...she went into the bathroom and hasn't come out yet."
"You got the laser mic working?"
"Connected to the camera, just put the headphones on and flip the switch."
Davenport looks through the camera...puts the headphones on and flips the switch...the sound of running water is heard.
"Sounds like she's taking a shower."
"Really? Let me...never mind"
"That's what I thought."
Tony opens the door and walks in.
"He doesn't look tall to me."
Davenport turns her head and looks at Simms, who's looking through binoculars.
She shakes her head and looks through the camera again.
"What kind of person wears sunglasses indoors?"
"Sexy illegal arms dealers, apparently."
"Sexy?"
She pauses..."Shut up, Simms."
Ziva walks out in a silk bathrobe.
"What took you so long?"
"What are they saying?"
Davenport pulls the headphone cord.
"I ran into a lovely girl in the lobby, dear."
"Oh...well...is there anything you want to do?"…She smiles.
"You mean other than you?"...He grins.
"That'll do."...She pull him into the bathroom by his tie.
"These have to be the two horniest gun runners ever, Lissa."
"He called me lovely."
"What?"
"Nothing."
"No, you definitely said something."
"Shut up, Simms."
--------------
The balding black man sat in a chair in an office, working on his computer.
The younger man with the buzz cut walked into the room.
"I just ran their faces through the law enforcement database, Pete. Nothing."
Pete nodded…"Good, I'm gonna go back later tonight and check on them, make 'em sweat for a night, then we'll go on with the plan, if everything is ready to go…right?"
The black man stands…"Right."…He picks up a cup from the desk and takes a drink.
"Shit, how can you drink coffee at night? Don't you like sleeping?"
"Not particularly…it stops me from making money and I'm easier to kill."
"You have to loosen up, Jones."
"When you've seen shit I have, you'd think differently."
"The war's over, man…the war's over."
"Weren't you going somewhere?"
Pete nods and leaves.
---------------
Director Shepard and Kate walk into MTAC.
"How's the undercover work going?"
"Orgasmicly"
McGee turns…"Oh, I'm sorry, Kate."
Kate extends her hand…"Here's the info about the ATF agents, Gibbs."
She quickly leaves.
McGee sighs…"I'm an idiot."
Gibbs takes off his headset and places it on his chair and goes after Kate, he grabs the railing, catching her as she's halfway down the stairs.
"It's not real, Kate."
"Do you know that for certain, Gibbs?"
Gibbs is silent.
"I didn't think so."…Kate continues down the stairs and moves to her desk and sits back down.
"Damn you, DiNozzo."…Gibbs whispered to himself.
---------
Simms looks through the camera, Ziva takes out a laptop and sets it on the bed.
Simms moves to and shakes Lissa's arm waking her up…"Hurry."
"What, are they doing it again?"
"No, she's on her laptop, do your thing, computer lady!"
Lissa jumps up and moves to her computer, she clicks a button and types in her password.
"Damn it! I can't see the screen."
"No worries, I'm almost in."
--------
Gibbs walks back into MTAC.
"Gibbs, they're trying to hack Ziva's laptop.
McGee looks at Gibbs…who's silent…he continues to stare at him.
"Boss?"
Gibbs looks at him funny…"What do you think, McGee…stop them!"
"On it, Boss!"
--------
Lissa continues typing…."What the hell?"…She raises her hands in frustration.
---------
"She's in a constant 22 destination loop, Boss."
"Ziva, turn off the laptop."
Ziva closes the laptop, knocking Lissa from the system.
--------
Simms sits wearing headphones, in front of the camera, looking through it…"I thought you were good with that thing, Lissa?"
"I am good."
"They must be gooder."
"Gooder?"
"Aww."…He shrugs…"Just blame it on the lack of blood to my brain."
She sighs…"How did I get teamed up with Mr. horndog?"
"Whatever…at least I'm not falling for a illegal arms dealer."
"What!? Never."
Simms laughs…"He just said something about you again."
"Really!?"
"Yeah, he mentioned about wanting to divorce his wife and runs off with the lady who thought he was tall in the lobby."
"You're an asshole, Simms."
"I'd rather be an asshole, than a whole ass, Lissa."
"Are you calling me an ass?"…She quickly stands up.
"I dunno am I?"
She sits back down…"Shut up, Simms."…Shaking her head getting back to work on her computer.
----------
Ziva hops forward on the bed…"Boxing is such a brutal sport…which one do we want to die?"
Tony chuckles…"I got 20 bucks on the white guy."
"Ooh, I dunno…he holds his right hand a little low, he'll be susceptible to a left hood."
Tony looks back at her…"Wow, I knew I loved you for a reason, sweet cheeks."
She smiles…"See, he leaves his right hand low."…The white man is knocked out.
"Shit!"
"Told ya!"…She laughs.
"Can I borrow 20 bucks, baby?"
Ziva laughs…"No."
Tony turns and takes Ziva back into his arms and kisses her passionately…"Now, can I borrow it?"
"Hmm, still a no."
Tony stands up as Ziva moves back on the bed…Tony pulls the sheet over his head.
"Ooh, scary."…Ziva laughs.
"Ever been eaten by a ghost?"
"Umm, nope."
"How about a man covered in a sheet?"…Tony laughs evilly.
----------
"Oh, crap…there at it again!"
Lissa pulls the headphones off the Simms and slides them on, Ziva giggles and moans…Lissa sighs.
"Why does she always get to have all the fun? Bitch!"
Simms is about to say something, but stops and just shakes his head.
"Takes photos of this, Simms."
"Why?"
"Evidence, of course."
"To do what…ladyjack later?"
------------
Kate sits on her couch and sighs.
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Kate."...She pauses..."And stop talking to yourself!"
She starts crying..."Why are you doing this to me, Tony?"
---------
Several hours later
Simms is tied up with the headphones cord to a chair.
"I said I was sorry about the ladyjacking comment, Lissa...even if it is true."
Tony and Ziva both lie in bed, sleeping...Lissa takes more pictures.
"I hope you can do it with both hands."
She turns her head..."Would you like me to shoot you, Simms?"
"Not really."
"Then shut up."
Simms goes quiet, then stands up, breaking free.
She turns her head..."Why didn't you do that from the beginning?"
Simms shrugs..."Read something like that in Dear Penthouse once, thought I'd let it go through."
Lissa laughs..."In your dreams, Simms."
"No, in my dreams, you're Angelina Jolie and you're naked and nice."
"Hey, I'm nice!"
"What year?"
"Hey, you little piss ant.."...There's a knock on the door at Tony and Ziva's hotel room interrupting their argument.
Lissa looks through the camera...once again there's a knock.
-----------
Lissa looks through the camera.
Tony rises from the bed, wrapping the bed spread around him...the door again knocks.
"I'm coming, I'm coming."
"Not anymore, you aren't."
Tony opens the door slightly and quickly closes it.
"Shit!"
"Simms, we might have something here."
Tony opens the door again just enough to get out and slides through the door and closes it.
Lissa zooms in on the door, but all she can hear is muffled noises..."Shit!"
"Want me to go over there, Lissa?"
"Yeah, go up and see what's going on."
Simms leaves through the door.
Lissa moves the camera to Ziva, who's still asleep, snoring...she makes an angry face.
5 minutes pass...
The door opens and Tony walks back in.
"Can you hear me, Simms?"...Holding her finger to her earwig.
"Loud and clear, what's up?"
"He's back in, where are you?"
"Elevator."
"See anyone?"
"Just some crying lady."
"Ok, abort...I repeat, abort."
"Coming back now."
Tony closes the door, but the bed spread is stuck in the door. He yanks on it.
"Ugh."...He yanks on it again..."Aww, screw it."
Tony just lets go of it and walks back towards the bed completely naked.
Lissa drops the camera and her mouth opens wide and she freezes.
A few minutes pass and Simms walks back into the room.
"Just some lady, Lissa."
She doesn't respond.
"Lissa? You ok?"...He moves over to her and snaps his fingers in front of her face.
"LISSA!"
She shakes her head..."W-w-what?"
"What the hell happened to you?"
"Moby dick."
"What?"...Simms picks up the camera.
"Oh god, I didn't get a photo."...She puts her face down to her hands and start rocking..."Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!"
"Umm, did I miss anything big?"
She lowers her hands..."You could say that."
----------
Tony sits up and swings his legs over the edge of the bed onto the floor.
Ziva wakes..."What's wrong?"
"I gotta go."
She sits up..."What do you mean, you gotta go?"
Ziva moves behind him, wrapping her arms around his neck, placing her chin on his shoulder..."What is it?"
Tony brings his arm back and places his hand on the back of Ziva's head and caresses it, he turns his head and whispers in her ear..."Kate was here."
"What!?"
Tony sighs..."That's why I have to go."...He said softly.
"What happened?"
"What are they saying, Lissa?"
"No idea, they're whispering...well, he is...I think he's leaving."
"Probably out of condoms."
"Good thought, but they aren't using condoms."
"How do you know? Wait, never mind."
Tony continues to speak softly..."I know I shouldn't go, but damn, she's beyond pissed."
"About what?"
"She thinks we're actually making love."
Ziva sighs..."I wish."...She pauses..."I don't get her, you've done everything in your power to make her happy, yes?"
Tony nods.
Ziva kisses him softly on the ear and whispers..."She treats you like shit, Tony."
Tony grabs his pants from the foot of the bed and starts putting them on it...he stands pulling them up.
"Jeez, he has a great ass...take of photo of it, Simms. Hurry!"
"No fucking way, Lissa. You do it."...He tosses her the camera.
Lissa grabs it and zooms in, but it's too late..."Damn you, Simms!"
"Yeah, you definitely need to get laid."
"No shit, Sherlock."
"Wanna do me?"
"Only if I get to shoot you at the end."
Simms thinks for a moment..."Ummm, will it be a fatal shot?"
"In the balls, Simms."
"I think I'll pass."
Tony turns and leans down and whispers something else in Ziva's ear while putting on his shirt.
She tilts her head back a little, then nods.
"Don't go, Tony...make love to me."
Tony looks down at her and smiles...he moves his right hand to her cheek and caresses it, she turns her mouth and kisses his hand.
"I'll be back in a few, I promise."
Tony grabs his jacket and keys and leaves.
Ziva sighs and stands and moves to the window, she grabs a stick of lipstick and opens it up, she starts writing on the window.
She finishes writing and then closes the blinds...she moves back to the bed and lays back down.
She closes her eyes and sighs...she thinks back to making love to Tony.
Lissa zooms out a bit..."What the hell?"
Simms picks up the binoculars and looks through them...the writing on the window says: "Hi ATF! Enjoy the Show: ) "
"How'd we get made?"...Lissa frustratedly said.
"Oh Tony."...Ziva moaned repeatedly through Lissa's headphones.
Lissa sighs..."God, I hate her!"...She takes the headphones off.
----------
Tony stood by a payphone in the back of a diner, he picks up the receiver and puts 50 cents into the phone and dials...the phone rings 4 times..."I hate the world, bye."...beep.
Tony sighs..."Changed the phone machine message, I see...pick up, Kate...I know you're there."
Kate sits on the couch holding a box of tissues, covered in a blanket.
"Come on, Kate...I'm sorry."...Tony lifts his hands in frustration..."Pick up, Kate...please."...The machine cuts him off.
Tony puts in 2 more quarters and dials again.
"Pick up, Kate...I'm gonna keep calling until you talk to me."
5 minutes later..."Kate, please pick up the phone. What else can I do? Please talk to me. Please. At least tell me what I did to deserve this? Am I that big of an asshole that you won't even talk to me? I broke every rule of under cover just to talk to you, to see if you're ok."...The machines cuts him off again.
"Fuck!"
Tony looks down at his hand, he has 2 quarters left. He shakes them in his palm and then pops them into the machine...it rings 4 times and goes to machine..."Great, the machine again...I so fucking love the machine...ya know, I didn't think it was true, but Ziva may be right."
Kate quickly picks up the phone..."Fuck you, Tony!"...She pauses, biting her lip...she sighs...a tear rolls down her cheek.
Tony swallows hard..."You know, I would never say anything like that to you and I guess I'm an idiot, because I take it and I keep taking it, because I love you, but apparently that isn't good enough for you."...Tony hangs up and leaves.
-------------
Lissa flips the switch and Ziva continues to moan.
"Man, she can't get enough, made love to for hours and she's still masturbating."
"Did you say masturbating?"
"Shut up, Simms."
"Let me listen."
"Nope, you wouldn't take a photo of his ass, so no."
"You're such a tease...you're bi, aren't ya?"
"Excuse me!?"
"Well, you're listening to a woman ladyjack...that isn't normal for a straight woman, is it?"...As she continues to listen to Ziva moan Tony's name.
"Hey, I'm doing my job!"
"Ok...well, if he was alone and I had the earphones on, I wouldn't listen."...He shudders..."Ewww."
"Grow up, Simms."
---------
Tony walks back towards the hotel when a black towncar pulls up to him.
"Hey, buddy."
Tony moves to the car..."Yeah, what's up?"
A man in ski mask holds out a note..."Take it and turn around."
Tony takes the note and turns around...the car speeds away as Tony quickly turns around trying to get the license plate number, but there isn't one.
Tony opens the note..."Meet Peaches at Fredrick's at 8:30."
Tony turns and continues towards the hotel..."I think you can go home for the night, Boss...we're in."
----------
Ziva's lies completely naked on her side, facing away from the door. She breathes heavily, her eyes closed.
Tony slides the card into the reader, Ziva slowly pulls up the sheets, covering her naked body to her shoulder.
The door opens, Tony tosses his keys on the dresser and sits on the corner of the bed.
"He's back, Simms."
"Saying anything?"
"Nope, I think he just sat on the bed."
"Is she still...ya know?"
"Nope."
Tony sighs, he kicks his shoes off and lays back into the bed.
Ziva rolls over to her back, then rolls over again, she cuddles with him, placing her head on his chest, her arm across his chest. She cozies up to him, smacking her lips a couple of time.
Tony brings his left arm up, running his fingers through her hair.
"Tony, Gibbs went home, I'll be with you tonight, just in case."...McGee said through Tony's earwig.
Tony shakes his head..."20 bucks and all I get is a fuck you."...Tony whispered.
"Tony?"
"Nothing."
"Ok."
Tony sighs.
Ziva starts to snore.
Tony smiles..."Good 'ol reliable, sweet cheeks."
Lissa holds her hands against the earphones..."Sweet cheeks?"
Simms looks at Lissa..."He's not talkin' about you, that's for sure."
---------
The next morning...7:20 a.m.
Ziva is still asleep in bed.
Tony stands in the bathroom, the shower is on..."You still there, McGee?"
"Nope, he went home, DiNozzo."
"Did he find Fredrick's, Boss?"
"Yep, it's in the red light district. 1782 S. Euclid St."
"Damn, they must've gotten spooked about something."
"If you found the ATF, I'm sure they did, too."
"Thanks for the info, Boss."
"Oh, before you go, DiNozzo...sorry about Kate thing, totally my fault."
"I'm fucked either way, Gibbs."...Tony takes out his earwig and sets it on the bathroom sink and hop into the shower.
--------
Simms wakes up..."Hey, the blinds are open again."
Lissa continues to look through the camera.
"He's been up for awhile now."
"Have you slept at all?"
"Nope and I'm on my 13th cup of coffee...I've had to pee for 2 hours."
"Then go pee, for Christ sale...you aren't sniper waiting for kill shot."
Simms walks over and grabs the camera...Lissa quickly runs off to the bathroom.
"She's awake now, Lissa."...Simms takes a few pictures of Ziva as she starts to move. She holds up her hand blocking the sun from her eyes.
Lissa walks out of the bathroom..."God, I needed that...anything Simms?"
Ziva waves towards them..."Look, she's waving at me."...Simms smiles.
Ziva then holds up her middle finger.
"That's for you, Lissa."...He chuckled.
"I really, really hate her."
---------
Ziva makes her way into the bathroom..."Boker tov."
Tony sticks his head out from behind the shower curtain..."What?"
"Oh, sorry...good morning."
"Good morning, Z!"
Ziva moves to the shower and slightly puts her hand on the shower certain..."You ok?"
"Yeah, life sucks, but then you die."
Ziva drops her robe and steps in behind Tony.
"Jesus, Ziva."
She laughs..."You've seen me naked before."
"Heh. I know."
"Bathe with me."
"I can't."
"Come on, I don't bite...unless you want me, too."...She grins.
Tony starts to get out, but Ziva grabs his arm..."Please, Tony."
"Ziva, I want to, but I can't. God, I want to. I-I'm sorry."...He sighs...Water runs down Ziva's chest...Tony stares at it..."My God, you have amazing boobs."...He quickly closes the curtain.
Tony shakes his head, he walks to the mirror and rubs it clear..."Damn you for being loyal!"
"What was that, Tony?"
"I suck."
"No, but I do, yes?"
Tony frowns and looks back at the shower curtain, then back at mirror..."I hate you, me!"
---------
Tony puts in his earwig.
He moves out of the bathroom wearing a towel, he grabs a bottle of water from the mini-fridge and moves to the window. He opens the bottle and takes a drink.
Tony turns to the table and grabs a pen and paper and writes something.
He then holds it up against the window.
Lissa looks through the binoculars...the note reads: "Call me anytime, Agent Davenport, 555-2489."
Tony walks over to his clothes and grabs his pants and puts them on, then his dress shirt...his cell phone rings.
Tony answers it..."Good morning, Agent Davenport, how is the ATF today?"
"Fine and you."
She puts her hand over the receiver..."Fine and you?"
"Shut up, Simms."
She takes her hand off..."Sorry about that."
"It's ok, so, how long have you been in the ATF?"
"I dunno, how long have you been an illegal arms dealer?"
"You tell me, you have my file, don't you?"
She pauses..."Well, let me start then...your name is Melissa Ann Davenport, you've been with been ATF for 6 years, 11 months and 6 days. You partner's name is Russell William Simms, he's a probie, been with ATF 14 months, with you 6. How am I doing so far?"
She gasps..."Should I continue?"...Tony pushes a button, putting the cell on speaker, he puts on his socks and shoes..."Your birthday is July 8th."
"Stop it, I get it!"...She puts her hand over the receiver again..."God, he's smart and sexy."
She takes her hand off the phone...brushing her arm against her chest..."My nipples are hard."
"Heh heh."
Lissa slaps herself in the forehead as Simms shakes his head.
"Melissa?"
"God, what is wrong with me? I'm going insane."
"Melissa?"
"What are you doing, Lissa?"
"The hell if I know, Simms."
"Melissa!"
Lissa quickly brings the phone back up to her ear..."Oh, sorry."
"Heh. Tell your partner, he follows too closely when he's tailing someone."
Click
-----------
Tony and Ziva stand in the parking garage. Ziva takes out a black box and pushes a button.
"How does that thing work?"
"If there's a bug within 10 feet of it, it'll beep."
She moves to the trunk and the machine starts to beep.
"Pop the truck."
Tony pushes a button and the trunk pops open...she moves the machine around until the beep gets loud, she pulls up a section of carpet and pulls out a bug. She drops it on the ground and steps on it, smashing it.
She goes over the car one more time..."Ok, it's clean."...They both get in the car and drive off.
--------
Lissa and Simms are both holding and pulling their ear..."Damn that hurt."
"Any other bright ideas, Lissa?"
"Shut up, Simms."
----------
Tony and Ziva arrive at Fredrick's in the red light district. They stand outside the door.
Music blares from inside.
Tony extends his hand..."Come, dear."
Ziva takes his hand and Tony opens the door and they go inside.
Ziva covers her ears..."What is that, it's scrambling my brain!"
"It's stupified, by Disturbed!"
"It's making my earwig wig out!"
"Take it out then!"
"Ok!"...Ziva carefully pops her earwig out as they move towards the bar.
"Umm, Tony!"
Tony moves his mouth to her ear..."Yeah?"
"This isn't a normal bar, yes!?"
Tony looks around the bar...only men and drag queens are inside.
"Heh. You're the best looking woman in joint, Zee-vah!"
She laughs..."I'm the only woman in the joint!"
They move to the bar...a man wearing skin tight leather stands with his back to the bar.
"Excuse me!"
He turns around..."Hey there gorgeous! How 'bout a free drink on me!?"
"Thanks!"
"Not you, girl...him!"...He smiles at Tony.
Tony chuckles..."Thanks!?"
He smiles and nods..."What can I get ya, babe!?"
"Peaches!?"
"Figures...bitch! She's in the back!"
Tony nods.
They turn..."Should I be jealous you're getting more attention than me, Tony!?"
"In a gay bar? Hardly!"
"It is!?"
"What!?"
"It's hard!?"
Tony laughs..."Only you for, dear!"
She grins..."Just not in the shower, yes!?"
Tony shakes his head..."Come on, sweet cheeks...lets go get us some peaches!"
------------
Tony and Ziva walk into a back room, the music has softened quite a bit.
"Oh thank god, I can hear again!"...She slips her earwig back in.
They walk down a hallway and past a curtain, a tall, thin person in a yellow dress wearing 6 inch pink platforms stands facing towards the left wall.
"Peaches?"
"Yes, darling?"...He turns towards them, he's wearing a long white wig that goes down past his waist, talking with an eastern European accent.
"Umm, we were told to come and see you?"
"Darling!"...He looks at Tony, then at Ziva..."Darling!"
He breathes in..."Oh my."...He giggles...he moves to Ziva..."I envy you, darling!"
Ziva looks up at the man..."You do?"
"You have what I crave, darling!"
"I do?"...She flexs her nose.
"A vagina, darling!"
Ziva face goes plain..."Oh, that's nice, I guess."
"Yes, another 6 months and I'll have enough for the sex change, darling...then it's so long schlong."
Tony shakes his head..."Heh."
"What?"...Ziva looked puzzled.
Tony moves his mouth to her ear..."He's cutting off his penis."
"My god, why!?"
"To become like you, darling!"
Ziva shakes her head..."Men are nuts."
"Heh. Those are going, too."
Ziva looked up at him..."So, Peaches? Got a last name?"
"Peaches McGee, at your service, darling."
Tony and Ziva both laugh..."What is so funny, darlings?"
Tony chuckles..."Nothing, just wondering to yourselves if you're related to someone we know."
Peaches smiles..."I doubt it, I'm one of kind, darling!"
"That you are...that you are."...Tony moved towards him..."Do you have anything for us?"
"Oh, yes, of course, darling."...He moves to the back and opens a safe and takes out a manila envelope...he walks back and hands it to Tony..."There you go, darling!"
Tony nods..."Thanks, Peaches."
"My pleasure, darling."...He takes a step towards Tony..."Italian, correct?"
"Yes, sir."
"I'm from Romania, darling"
"Oh, really...I was wondering about your accent."
He smiles..."I've never been to Italy, darling."
"It's a nice place, you'd enjoy it."
He grins and moves his head down and whispers something in Tony's ear.
He backs away..."Ok, we have to go now!"...Tony quickly grabs Ziva hand and they leave through the curtain.
"Bye, darlings. Come back and see Peaches after the surgery, darling!"...He pushes the curtain open and waves.
"What was that about, Tony?"
Tony shudders..."He...he said everyone tells him it looks like there's a little Italian in him, he always responds...no, but I'd like some."
Tony shudders again..."Move faster, Ziva!"
"Good, if I heard darling one more time, I was gonna puke. I mean, who wears pink shoes with a yellow dress!?"...As they hurry out of the bar.
"Out of everything, that's what you found weird about him, Z?"...Tony shakes his head.
Ziva shrugs..."And for some reason, I have a huge craving for Italian sausage."
"Heh."
---------
Tony and Ziva get back into the car.
"Having a good time, DiNozzo?"
"Oh yeah...I love getting hit on by dudes. I live for it, Boss."
Gibbs chuckles..."Aww, too bad, it was your type DiNozzo, willing."
"Aww, come on, Boss...you know my manwhore days are over."
Ziva nods..."They are Gibbs, I was naked and begging and he got out of the shower."
Tony sighs.
"Wow, our DiNozzo is changing. Quick, McGee...check the Weather Channel, is hell frozen over?"
"I thought McGee went home, Boss."
"Never made it, passed out at his desk."
"Heh."...Tony pauses..."You hearing me, Probie?"
"Yep, what's up Tony?"
"You don't happen to have a crazy European uncle, do ya?"
"Ha ha! Very funny, Tony. Peaches McGee..."
Tony and Ziva giggle.
"As I was saying, Peaches McGee..."...They giggle again.
"Knock it off, you two!"
"Sorry, Boss/Gibbs."
"Peaches McGee's real name is Petr Cedriv...he's been arrested 17 times for soliciting and twice for drug possession."
"Probie, pull the files on his arrests, maybe you'll find something."
"I'm on it."
"What's the news on the ATF agents, Boss?"
"Nothing much, Director Shepard is suppose to be letting them know about our operation."
"I wouldn't worry about it, Boss...they're like the 3 stooges, minus the smart one."
"Which ones the smart one?"
"Exactly."
"What's in the envelope, DiNozzo?"
"Haven't opened it yet."
"Well open it...wait, give it to Ziva...you're bad luck with envelopes."
Tony begrudgingly hands it to Ziva...she opens it and pulls out a cell phone. Also inside is a piece of paper.
"Spend another night at the hotel, we will call you. Make sure you have the 2 million dollars in cash."
"I'll send McGee to pick up the paper, maybe they made a mistake and left a fingerprint or some DNA."
"What do you want us to do, Gibbs?"
"Act married."
"Good marriage or one of yours, Boss?"
"DiNozzo!"
"Shutting up, Boss."
"Hey, can we stop and get something to eat before heading back?"
Tony nods..."Sure, what you have a craving for...besides Italian sausage?"...He smiles.
"Ummm..."...She grins.
"Out of curiosity...is that...kosher? Heh."
Ziva laughs.
----------
Later that day...
Gibbs walks into Abby's lab with caf-pow, in hand.
"What you got for me, Abs?"
Abby turns around holding Bert, she squeezes him...it makes a fart noise.
Gibbs shakes his head.
"No fingerprints, but I did get a DNA sample from the envelope where someone licked it before closing it."
"How long?"...Gibbs hands Abby the caf-pow, she takes it and sets it down, she squeezes Bert again.
"You ok, Abby?"
"Yeah, I'm just worried."
"They'll be fine, Abs."
"That's not who I'm worried about, Gibbs."
Gibbs nods..."Have you talked to her?"
"No...should I?"
"Yeah, I think that would be a good idea."
Gibbs turns to leaves, but stops..."How long, Abs?"
"10-12, Gibbs."...She picks up her caf-pow and takes a sip from the straw...she then picks up her phone and dials..."Kate...how about some lunch?"
------------
Lissa sighs.
"You're in love with him, aren't you?"
"Of course not, Simms!"
"Then what would you call it? Obsessed?"
"I dunno...intrigued, maybe?"
"What does he have that I don't?"
"Good looks, height, good hygiene."
"Hey, I bathe!"
"Not well."
Simms shakes his head and goes into the bathroom.
Lissa takes out her phone and dials...it rings...and again...
"Hello?"
Lissa quickly hangs up.
The toilet flushes and door opens.
"You called him, didn't you?"
"I most certainly did not!"
"Your cell phone is still in your hand, Lissa."
"Damn it!"...She sighs..."You know, for a illegal arms dealer he's pretty nice."
"It's called charm, Lissa...you know, the weird way you like Hannibal Lecter even though he's a crazy bastard, even though if he had his way, he'd be munching on ya...and not in the same way you want Mr. Tall over there to, ya know what I mean?"
"Why do I listen to you?"
"Probably because I'm the only one here."
She sighs...
"Oh look, they're back."...Simms picks up his binoculars..."They brought lunch. Man, I'm hungry."
"Why don't you go get us something."
"Yeah? Ok, I can do that."...Simms puts down his binoculars and leaves.
Lissa takes her cell phone back out and dials.
----------
Tony's cell rings...it's answered.
Lissa pauses..."Hey there, Mr. illegal arms dealer."
It's silent.
"I have to tell ya, I really don't like your wife, she SO gets on my nerves, but you...there's something about you. I just can't put my finger on it, but there's this thing I feel between us...it's strong."...She pauses..."But that wife of yours...god, she's annoying...uh, no offense, of course."
"None taken."...Ziva answered.
Lissa gasps as Ziva laughs.
"Tony! It's the ATF kalba for you."
Lissa sighs...as Ziva walks towards Tony and hands him the phone.
"Thanks, sweet cheeks."
Lissa sighs again..."I thought I was sweet cheeks."
"What's up Agent Davenport?"
"Um, oh, um, uh."
"Hello?"
"Um, uh, eh, oh."
"Heh. All you need to do now is breath heavily and we have the makings of a cheesy b-rated horror movie."
Click
Tony shrugs..."She'll call back, they always do."
Lissa smacks herself in the head with her cell phone..."Ow!"
---------
Kate walks in DiNardo's restaurant, Abby stands being waited to sit.
"Abby?"
Abby turns around and hugs Kate..."It's good to see you!"
"You saw me yesterday, Abby."
She pulls away from her..."I know."
Kate sighs..."You had to choose DiNardos, didn't ya?"
Abby frowns..."Sorry, we always go here."
"It's ok."
"Lets get a table, we need to have a serious pregnant woman to goth girl talk!"...She grins.
----------
Abby and Kate sit at a table, Kate sips on some water.
"You're starting to show a little Kate."...Abby smiles.
"I know."...She frowns.
"Aww, don't be like that, Kate...it's a beautiful thing."
"Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?"
"No...I'm worried about you."
Kate takes another sip of water..."Why?"
Abby tries to say something, but stops...she tries again.
"What is it, Abby?"
"Ok, I'm just gonna say it...you're being a bitch."
"What? Now you're against me!?"
"No one is against you...well...maybe Ziva, but that's it!"
"I thought you were my friend, Abby."...She starts to get up.
Abby grabs her hand..."I am your friend. Talk to me."
Kate sits back in her chair...she sighs..."He's cheating on me, Abby."...Kate starts to cry.
Abby moves closer hugging her..."Kate, they're undercover...it's NOT real."
Kate looks up..."Do you know that for certain?"
"Yes, I do."
"What? You do?"
McGee told me Ziva got into the shower with him and he got out.
"Really?"
"You know how Ziva is...she never quits and he keeps denying her...for you, Kate. For you."
Kate lowers her head.
"You're pushing him away."
"I don't mean to."
"I know, but you are."...Abby hugs her again..."Come on, lets get out of here."
Kate wipes away her tears..."Aren't we going to eat?"
Abby smiles..."I didn't think you were hungry."
Kate points to her stomach..."Hello."...She laughs and snorts.
Abby laughs.
----------
Lissa shakes her head as she watches Tony and Ziva lie in bed talking.
Simms opens the door.
"Oh, thank god."
Lissa quickly gets up and grabs the food from Simms.
Lissa searches through the bag, grabbing a sandwich..."Man, you must be hungry."
"It's from listening to her."
"What, they're at it again?"...He moves to the window grabbing the binoculars.
"Naw."...She takes a bite of her sandwich...she quickly swallows..."No, she keeps talking about wanting some Italian sausage."...She takes another bite.
"Slow down, Lissa. Sheesh."...He pauses, placing on the headphones...he laughs..."You're right, she's mentioned it twice in the last 30 seconds...sounds like she's obsessed about it, kinda like you and tall boy."...He chuckled.
"Shut."...She chews..."Up."...She swallows..."Simms!"...She takes another bite.
"Not too fond of Italian sausage."
"Sounds good to me, nice and plump and juicy."...She takes another bite, chewing it slowly, savoring it.
Lissa finishes her sandwich and moves over and takes the headphones off of Simms and sits back down in front of window, he guzzles an entire bottle of water and burps..."Excuse me."
Simms hits on the bed and kicks his shoes off, eating his sandwich.
"Sounds like he's craving something, too."...She pauses..."Hey, Simms?"
Simms chews and swallows..."Yeah?"...He takes a drink of his pop.
"What's poontang pie?"
Simms spits his pop everywhere.
---------
Tony and Ziva lie in bed, looking up at the ceiling.
Ziva laughs..."And what would you like of that poontang pie?"
"Whipped cream...hell, cool whip'll do...chocolate sauce."
"Kinky. With a cherry on top, yes?"...She grins.
"Don't forget the sprinkles."
"Oh, my bad. What color?"
"Red, white and blue, of course."
"Naturally."
"I am patriotic after all."
She smiles..."I like my Italian sausage plain, no bun, no mustard...just the sausage...it taste better that way."
Tony turns over looking at Ziva...he waves towards the window..."That's how I'd serve it to ya."
Ziva smiles.
Lissa chuckles.
Simms looks at Lissa..."If I did that, you'd call me an idiot."
"You are an idiot."
"Yeah, this is coming from the lady who's beggin' to give away a piece of poontang pie to a stranger, who's married and an illegal arms dealer."
"So?"
Simms laughs..."At least you're admitting it now."
Ziva laughs as she tickles Tony...she moves her hands to his crotch.
Tony giggles..."Whoa there, fast hands!"
Ziva grins..."I've changed my mind."
"About what?"
"I think I also want some nuts with my Italian sausage. They're salty, yes?"
Tony laughs..."I wouldn't know."
---------
Later that night...
Gibbs walks into Abby's lab.
"You got something, Abs?"
Abby nods..."Sure do."...She clicks a few keys and the balding black man pops up on her monitor.
"He's Clarence Jones, he's ex-marine, cold war era...no arrests, not even a single ticket, Gibbs."
"Address?"
"1762 S. Church Blvd. Arlington, Virginia."
"Nice work, Abby."...He kisses her on the cheek.
She grins.
--------
Gibbs moves back into MTAC.
"McGee, you're with me."
"Boss?"
Gibbs pushes a button..."DiNozzo!"
Tony coughs..."We have an address, we're checking it out."
Tony coughs again.
"Get him some water, bitch!"...Lissa yelled.
"Christ, wake up the entire hotel why don't ya, Lissa."
Just then the cell phone rings...Tony grabs it and opens the door and walks out into the hall.
"Yeah?"
"There will be a boat waiting for you tomorrow morning at 8 am, it'll take you out to sea, make sure you have the money."
"Where?"
"National Yacht Club."
"Name of the boat?"
"You'll know it when you see it."
"Ok."
Click
"Boss, hold off."
"We heard, DiNozzo...we're still gonna check it out."
"Orders?"
Tony walks down the hall..."Yeah, I got it, Boss."
Tony walks back into the room.
Ziva stands..."News?"
Tony nods to her..."It was a false alarm."
She nods back..."Come back to bed then."
----------
Lissa looks through the camera, then puts it down, rubbing her eyes. She stands and moves to the table, grabbing a cup of coffee.
She walks back, she takes a sip as she sits back down in the chair.
"God, my butt is so damn sore and my back"...She groans.
She puts the coffee cup on the windowsill and stretches, popping her back...she groans and lets out a yawn.
She looks to her left and Simms is fast asleep.
She picks up the camera and looks, Tony stands in the window waving.
She lowers the camera, rubbing her eyes once again, then looks through the camera yet again...Tony is mouthing something.
"What?"
Tony continue to mouth something...he then puts his hands up to his face like a phone.
She takes her cell phone out and dials..."Hello?"
"Good morning, Agent Davenport."
She yawns..."What's up?"
"Turn around."
"What?"
"Turn around."
Lissa turns around and Ziva stands behind her...she smiles at her.
"I'm annoying, yes?"...She chuckled.
"Don't hurt her, sweet cheeks."
"Oh shit."
Ziva grabs her by back of the hair as she tries to get up from the chair, she quickly covers her mouth and nose with a cloth, and she's quickly out.
Ziva moves over to Simms, he has a small amount of drool on his face.
"He's just a baby, Tony."
"Heh. Then put the baby to a deeper sleep, Zee-vah!"
She nods and grabs him around the neck and applies the cloth to his mouth and nose.
"How long will they be out?"
"5-6 hours."
"Good."
Ziva turns and sees Lissa computer...she laughs..."Tony, you really need to see this."
"What is it, Ziva."
"Her screensaver is you."...She laughs a little louder.
"What?"
Ziva clicks a button..."Oh my."...Ziva grabs her laptop and leaves.
"What is it, Ziva?"
She smirks..."Nothing."...She laughs evilly.
----------
Tony and Ziva drive up to Grand Central Station.
"I can't believe you stole her laptop, Z."
"I didn't steal it…I borrowed it, I'll give it back."…She pauses…"After I copy it."…She said under her breath.
"What?"
"Nothing."
Ziva gets out and starts towards the door, she quickly turns around and leans through the window and smacks Tony hand as he tries to pick up the laptop…"I stole it, not you!"
"I thought you didn't steal it, Zee-vah!?"…While rubbing his hand.
She grins…"I lied…don't touch it, I mean it, Tony!"
She turns and runs inside.
Tony grabs it and opens it…he turns it on and clicks a button, a box pops up asking for a password…"Great, Ziva's gone McGeek on me."…Tony pauses…."Ummm, what could be her password?"
He types in kalba…"Her favorite word. Heh."
"Denied. Damn it."
He types in harah.
"Denied."
"Shit, you're running out of Hebrew curse words, Tony."
Tony types in Italian sausage…"If this works, she can have it."…He pushes enter.
"Denied. No love sausage for Zee-vah!"
Ziva steps out of the doors carrying a duffel bag, Tony quickly turns it off, closes the lid and flops it back on the passenger seat and starts whistling.
Tony pops the trunk as Ziva tosses the duffel bag into the trunk, she closes the trunk and hops back into the car.
"Did you touch it?"
Tony stops whistling…"Of course not."
"You're lying to me, aren't you?"
"Maybe."
Ziva laughs…"You don't have the passssssssssssword."…She sticks her tongue out at Tony.
Tony reaches over and grabs her tongue.
"'ay! Wat ah u du rang?"
Tony chuckles…"So, that's what your tongue feels like. Heh."…He lets go of her tongue.
She backhands Tony…"Don't tease me."
She starts flexing and nibbling on her tongue…"Hey, did you hear anything from Gibbs?"
"The place was empty, he was suppose to be heading back to MTAC….Boss, you there?"
No response…Tony shrugs.
Tony puts the car into drive and drives off.
-------------
Tony looks at his watch, 7:50 a.m., he shakes Ziva's shoulder waking her.
"W-what?"
"Ten minutes 'til."
She sits up in the chair and rotates her neck popping it.
"Damn, Z."
"Sounds painful, yes?"
"Indeed."
"You should hear how my body sounds after sex."
"Please, Z…not now."
She grins…"Turning you on, yes?"
Tony shakes his head…"Do her, Tony…do her!"…A small Tony in a black tuxedo said to him, standing on his left shoulder.
"Don't! You love Kate."…Said the Tony dressed in a white tuxedo on his right shoulder.
"Don't listen to pansy-ass, do her, she's right here, do her now, she wants it, man! You have 10 minutes!"
"You're doing so good Tony, don't screw it up now!"
"Shut up, white makes you look fat!"
"It does not."
"Does, too!"
"Does not!"
"Does, too…times 100."
"That's so immature."
The black tuxedo Tony pulls a gun and aims at the white tuxedo Tony…"I'll show you immature, bitch!"
"Tony!?"…Ziva slapped Tony's face…"Are you ok?"
"What the fuck was that!?"
"Sorry, I didn't mean to slap you so hard."
"No, not that…never mind."
Ziva looks at him confused.
"Lets go."…Tony starts the car and drives through the gated area.
----------
"What boat are we looking for?"
"No idea, he said we'd know when we saw it."
Tony slams on the breaks…"What is it, Tony?"
Tony points…"There it is."
Ziva looks over at the boat named…"Money."
They step out of the car and move to the trunk.
"Throw out your guns."…A voice yelled.
They raise their heads from the trunk…"Excuse me?"
"Throw away your guns."
Tony takes his Sig from his shoulder holster and lays it on the ground.
"You to, lady!"
"I'm wearing a dress, where would I put it!?"
"Cut the shit, lady…get rid of the gun."
Ziva puts her right foot on the bumper and pulls up her dress…Tony immediately drops to his knees.
"Allow me."…He runs his hands up her leg, she looks down at him and smiles, he clutches her gun.
She grins…"You did know where to find it."…She runs her fingers across his forehead into his hair.
Tony kisses her inner thigh, making a loud kissing sound. He places her gun next to his. She lowers her leg as Tony rises from his knees, she again smiles at him.
"Enough! Do you have the money?"
"It's in the duffel bag."
"Open it up."
Tony unzips the bag…a man in a black ski mask comes out from behind shack holding a assault rifle…he tosses a suitcase over to them…"Empty the money into that."
Tony starts stacking the packs of 100-dollar bills inside the suitcase.
Ziva takes a step towards him… "Back lady!"
"Where are our guns?"
"Stand back! Now!"
Ziva takes a step back. Tony finishes putting the money into the suitcase.
"Toss the duffel bag into the water."
Tony tosses the duffel bag into the water.
"Good, now get on the boat."
Tony and Ziva move onto the boat…he follows right behind them, holding the gun on them.
"You!"…He points the gun at Tony…"Start the boat and go due east. Lady, untie us."
Tony starts the boat as Ziva unties the boat from the dock.
"Is that one of our guns."
The man is silent.
"Sweet cheeks, don't bother the man with assault rifle, please."
"I was just trying to be friendly."
"Aww, that's why I love you, baby."
"Knock it off you two!"
Ziva turns to him…"You don't get laid much, do you?"
"Shut your bitch up!"
Ziva clinches her fists.
Tony sees this…"No, Z. No."
Ziva turns to Tony.
He shakes his head left to right very slowly.
Straight ahead of them about 200 feet is another boat.
"Pull up right beside them."
Tony turns a little right and starts turning the boat.
"Toss him the rope, lady."
Ziva grabs the rope and tosses it to the another man wearing a ski mask, he catches it and pulls the two boats together. The man with the rifle steps over into the other boat.
The larger of the two men yelled…"You have the money?"
Tony holds up the suitcase… "It's right here."
"Toss it over."
"Where are the weapons?"…Ziva asked.
"Give me the fucking money!"
"Hey, there's a lady present…watch your language."
"Fuck you and your lady! Give me the fucking money!"
"Ok, let me put this into words you'll understand."…Ziva moves back towards Tony holding up something in her hand…"Where are the fucking weapons?"
"What is that?"
"Suicide switch, you kill me, the money goes boom."
"Fuck, Pete…you didn't check the money!?"
"You just said my fucking name, asshole!"
"Who gives a shit, you've fucked us in the ass!"
Tony moves towards them…"Hey, assholes…we don't who you are, if you like fuck men in the ass or even if you enjoy the occasional donkey show, we just want our weapons."
"Show them, Pete."
The man with the rifle holds up the gun.
"Toss it over!"
"Do it."…Pete pops out the clip and fires once into the air, then tosses the gun, Ziva snares it out of the air.
"M4A1, very nice."…She inspects the gun…"How many? Number of M4 to M4A1's?"
"1100 M4, 700 M4A1's."
Ziva raises her head…"Where's the other 200?"
"That's all you're getting."
"That wasn't the deal."
"Take it or leave it."
Ziva throws back the gun…"No deal."
"What!?"
"Are you hard of hearing…NO DEAL."…Ziva turns away.
"Wait!"
Ziva turns back towards them.
"We have 100 M203 grenade launchers."
"And?"
"What the fuck lady, you're killing us."
"No deal."
"We'll throw in a stinger missile."
"No fucking way, Clarence. No fucking way."
"Shut up, Pete…do we have a deal?"
Ziva nods…"Where are they?
"Below deck."
"Fuck this."…Pete backs up, sliding the clip back into the M4A1 and shoots Clarence in back, he falls into the water.
He then points the gun at Ziva…"Give me the fucking money now!"
Ziva raises her hands… "I'll shoot her, man!"
Tony walks towards her, carrying the suitcase…she slips behind him…"Here, catch!"…Tony tosses the suitcase at him as Ziva drops to her knees, he catches the money and stumbles backward, he's shot twice through the money and once in the head.
The man fall forward on top of the suitcase, blood pours out all over the suitcase and on the deck of the boat. Ziva holds the smoking gun in her hand.
A spotlight comes up on the boat…"This is the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, drop the weapon now and get on your knees!"
The ATF helicopter flies over them, Ziva's hair swirls around her face as she drops to her knees. She tosses the kill switch into the water.
Tony nods his head and chuckles.
Tony kneels next to her…"Thanks for the gun, Tony!"
"Heh. Thanks for letting me put it there!"
She grins…"Anytime!"
Tony pauses…"Hey, Ziva!"
"Yeah!?"
"What's on the laptop!?"
Ziva laughs… "Not a chance, Tony! Not a chance!"…She continues to laugh.
---------
Tony and Ziva sit in separate interrogation rooms, Ziva is silent, Tony is looking into the mirror brushing his hair humming.
Lissa and Simms stands in a room looking at them on close-circuit monitors.
"God, I hate her."
"What else is knew."
"Shut up, Simms."
"Exactly."
She turns towards him and is about to yell when the door opens and older man walks in…"Which one you want, Davenport?"
"You want us to interrogate them, Sir?"
The man nodded.
"I'll take the man."
"Do you think that's smart, Lissa?"
"Shut up, Simms."
"What is it?"
"Nothing, Sir."
"I guess I have her."
"Seems like it."…As she walks out the room, she moves down the hall, she breaths in, then out, then opens the door. She moves and sits in front of Tony.
"How are you Agent Melissa Ann Davenport?"
"Fine."
"Good."…He smiled.
She looked at them, then quickly away.
"Something wrong?"
"No, not at all."
Lissa reaches for her pencil, Tony reaches out and gently grabbed her, he lightly ran his hands up and down her arm.
"Are you sure?"
Lissa quickly pulled her arm away and left the room.
-----
Simms stood leaning against the mirror…"So?"
Ziva was silent.
"Come on, my boss is watching, say something, we have you dead to rights."
Ziva looked away and sighed.
"Ugh."…Simms sat down and looks down at the table as he twiddled his pencil between his fingers.
-------
Lissa stood in front of mirror in the bathroom.
She turns on the faucet and splashes water in her face..."Get your shit together, girl!"
She turns off the faucet and grabs a paper towel; she pats her face dry..."You can do this."
She walks out of the bathroom and moves to the interrogation room door, she grips the handle and opens it...she walks in and Tony' smiles.
"Oh god."...She quickly leaves and moves to the other interrogation room, she opens it..."Switch now!"
"What?"
"I said now."...Lissa grabs and pushes Simms out of the room
Ziva laughs.
Simms stands outside the room as Lissa slams the door.
He rubs his head and shrugs...he moves to the other interrogation room and opens it.
"Agent Davenport has something come up, I'll be taking over."...He closes the door and moves to the table and sits down.
"So, what were two talking about?"
Tony is silent.
Simms sighs..."Not again."
-----
Lissa leans against the door.
"You feel it in your chest and stomach, yes?"
Lissa turns to Ziva..."What?"
"The pain of love, yes?"
Lissa sighs.
"Believe me, I know the feeling."
"How, you're married to him."
Ziva lowers her head.
-----
Simms just sat there with a blank look on his face…the door opened…the older man walked in…"Let 'em go, Simms."
Simms stood quickly…"Sir?"
"Let 'em go."
Simms turned seeing Tony standing with his arm extended.
Simms shook his hand looking confused.
"Tony DiNozzo, NCIS."
"NCIS?"
"Heh. Naval Criminal Investigative Service."
"You're a fed?"
Tony nodded as they walked into the hallway, he patted Simms on the back…"Good luck with Davenport."…He chucked as he moved down hall.
The older man opened the door…"Ziva David? You can go."
"It's Dah-veed."…Ziva stood and quickly moved out the door.
"What's going on, Sir?"
He turns moving past Tony as he walked up to Davenport…"Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, NCIS, at your service."…He leaned in, kissing her cheek whispered something, then moved out the door.
Lissa closed her eyes and just stood there…"Is it true?"
Ziva walked up to her…"Yes."
Lissa sighed.
"We're not married…but he's taken."
"What?"
They both sighed.
Lissa looked at Ziva odd, like they understood each other…Ziva slowly walked away.
"Hey, about my laptop?"
Ziva turned around…"What about it?"
"What did you do with it?"
"It was in Tony's car, why?"
"We never found it."
"Huh?"…Ziva shrugged…"I'm sorry, but I don't have it."
Ziva turned and walked out.
Simms moved up to Lissa…"What did whisper to you?"
Lissa started to cry…"Sorry."
--------
Ziva walked out the door and Tony stood halfway to the street holding up his phone.
"Hey, Tony."
He quickly turned around…"What's up?"
"Umm, wanna go grab a bite to eat or something?"
"Heh. I'd love to, but if I don't get home soon Kate is gonna kill my ass."
"Come on, it's only an hour or so."
Tony moves to Ziva, he caresses her cheek…"I can get a raincheck, yes?"…Tony smiled.
"Yes, yes…of course."
Tony turned and walked away.
Ziva sighed and lowered her head.
----------
Tony pulls into his driveway and gets out of his car with flowers in hand.
He walks along the path up to his front door, he turns the handle and it's locked, he slides his key into the lock and unlocks it. The doors opens, except there's a chain on the door.
"What the..."
Tony knocks on the door..."Hello?"...He knocks again..."Kate?"
"Go away, Tony."
"Aww, Kate...what now? I'm home, the job is over."
"Please, Tony."
"Open the door, I have no place to go, remember...we live together now."
Tony holds the flowers through the opening of the door..."I brought you flowers, come on, baby."
Kate moves to the door and takes the flowers and pushes Tony hand out, then closes the door.
"Kate?"
About a minute passes..."Kate?"
Kate opens the door...she's a holding a laptop, it's screen is facing towards Tony.
"What's this Tony!? What is this!?"
There are numerous pictures of Tony and Ziva in bed together, underneath sheets.
Tony cracks a smile..."We were undercover, Kate...we didn't do anything."
"If you kissed her, you had sex with her, Tony."
Tony face goes plain..."What?"...Tony pauses..."We didn't do anything, we were playing a part, Kate."
"I know you, Tony."
"Apparently not, we DIDN'T do anything, I swear to God!"
"I don't believe you."
"How did you get those pictures anyway?"
"I followed you."
"You followed me? You could've blown our cover."
"That's all you care about?"
"You're twisting my words, Kate."
"You care more about your job than me."
"That's bullshit and you know it."
She slams shut the laptop and throws it at him, he catches it..."Take it and go back to the whore."
"Kate, stop it...I'm not going anywhere."
Kate turns and moves towards the stairs..."You're not staying here."
"I was doing my job, Kate."
She stops on the 3rd step..."Your job is fucking that slut!?"
Tony shakes his head..."The only fucking I did was my fucking job, Kate."
"Get out, Tony!"
"I'm not leaving, Kate...listen to me, please."...He moves towards her..."I love you."
"Don't you dare say that to me!"
"Why? It's the truth!"
Kate starts to cry, holding up left hand..."Only reason you gave me this ring is because of baby."
"That's not true...what can I do, Kate? Do you want me to quit my job? I'll do it. What!?"
"You never loved me...never."
Tony sighs..."Kate, stop it."
"No, you stop it...stop lying to me."
She moves to him..."Did you sleep with her?"
"No."
"Admit it."
"No!"
She slaps him and takes off the ring and throws it at him.
It hits him in the chest and drops to the floor and bounces a few times before coming to a rest.
Tony looks at the ring...then at Kate..."Give it to her, Tony...maybe she'll make you happy."
"Kate!"
"Get out! Get out, Tony. NOW!"
Tony lowers his head and the looks back up at her.
"Get out of here!"...She picks up the roses and throws them at Tony, one of thorns cuts his cheek..."Just get out."
Tony turns and pauses, listening to Kate cry.
"Go!"
Tony opens the door and leaves.
---------
Tony leans against the hood of his car, he puts his hand into his pocket looking for his keys, he pulls out the e-card for Ritz-Carlton.
He slaps it against his hand.
---------
Tony sits on the edge of the bed, he stares out at the window.
He brings his hands to face and just sits there.
30 minutes pass, Tony continues to hold his hands to his face.
He falls back onto the bed and shakes his head.
He brings up his cell phone and looks at it, he presses a button and brings up his contact list.
He moves down to Kate and sighs. He doesn't push it.
He quickly stands and leaves the room.
--------------
Tony moves up to a door and knocks.
Kate sits on the couch, staring at her ring...she twirls it between her fingers, there's a knock on the door.
She rises, putting the ring back and moves to the door, she looks through the peep hole, unchains the lock and opens it slowly.
"Large with everything, that'll be 16 dollars, ma'am."
Kate grabs her purse and pays for the pizza..."Keep the change."
"Thank you."
She closes the door and carries the pizza back to the couch.
The door slowly opens in front of Tony, a sweaty Ziva stands in the doorway, her hands taped up.
Ziva wipes sweat away from her brow with the sleeve of her sweatshirt..."What are you doing here, Tony?"
"This."...Tony moves to her kissing her passionately, he picks her up, pushing her back against a wall, she kisses him back, she wraps her legs around his waist and yanks at his shirt, she quickly takes it off.
Tony pull on her hair, moving her head to one side, he sucks and kisses on her neck.
Ziva lets out a moan as she starts pulling up on her sweatshirt, revealing her black bra.
Tony grabs her arms and pushes them over her head, holding them against the wall. He leans back and looks into her eyes and stares into them for a moment then kisses her deeply.
Tony lets go of her hands as they continue to kiss, her hands move to his pants, quickly unbuckling them...she pushes them down his hips, releasing him.
Ziva arches her back, quickly pulling down her sweat pants.
She wraps her arms around his neck waiting for the inevitable.
Her mouth opens as he enters her, every ounce of air is forced out of her and within seconds, it's sucked backed in.
She tightens her grip around his neck, her knees clutching at his sides.
Ziva's eyes roll back into her head, she slowly closes her eyes and tilts her head back as screams of passion and pleasure escape from her lips.
Tony covers her lips with his, kissing her as she remains in absolute bliss.
Ziva starts to fade away; her thoughts leave her, her mind gone. Her body goes limp, he holds her tight against the wall, his body still moving into her.
Her chin falls to his shoulder, she holds on with all her might as Tony makes love to her.
Their hearts pounds against each other, she releases onto him, she goes silent.
It rushes over her, putting her in an almost comatose state.
Tony follows her, leaving his essence inside her.
He firmly grips her hair and gently moves her head, bringing her mouth to his, he kisses her lightly on the chin, then her lips. He slowly runs his fingers through her damp hair as he kisses her passionately, she moans into his mouth.
He pulls his head back...he smiles..."Mind if I come in?"