October 5th, 2012
Tree Hill, North Carolina
Peyton and Lucas Scott's Living Room
"So, would you like to tell me exactly what happened?" Lucas Scott asked, startling his half asleep wife. Peyton looked up, pulling her half asleep body into an upright position and then promptly falling back into the pillow strewn, fluffy white bed that was a bit like a cloud. Lucas laughed which Peyton took as an extremely good sign, even though she knew that if she really listened she'd hear the pain behind the laugh, welded into the seemingly offhand response, and then fell back into the bed with her. "Peyt, I'm not mad Hun, I just want to know what happened."
He sounded desperate and broken, and Peyton was sure that if she had have looked up she would have seen the face of a begging man. And it wasn't as if she had anything to hide. Really…
"You remember that weekend at Rachel's cottage, right?" Peyton started, deciding that maybe she should just start from the beginning. She had never told anyone that she had ever been down to see Jake, and despite the fact that she knew in her heart that she had done nothing wrong, it was still hard to tell it, even after all this time.
"Yeah." Her husband whispered, lying down next to her and placing something in her arms. Peyton looked up to find Avery curling into the down comforter. She instantly scooped her into her arms, sitting up and then leaning into Luke, smiling softly as his fingers intertwined with hers.
Still not looking up from her daughter, Peyton continued. "Well, then you remember the Pete thing, and how he showed up and we got pretty close that weekend. Well, I got back and my dad was there for the first time in forever, and between that and the distance that was constantly separating us we weren't really doing so hot, so he called me one night, well, his manager called, and told me that there was a plane ticket to Chicago waiting for me at the airport, and that Pete would love to have me there for the weekend. I wasn't go, we just didn't feel right, but then my dad came in and he gave me this speech about how much he loved me, and how much he loved my mom and how he just wanted me to be happy, and have what he had with her because he just loved her so much, and she made him so happy, and he wanted that for me. And I was lonely and scared missing Brooke and after the shooting, it was just awkward for me to be around you, because of the kiss, and I just felt like I was missing something, and I just realized that I never felt like that when Jake was around. Jake made me feel like someone cared about me, like I mattered. So I called him and asked him if it would be okay if I came down, he said yes, and when I saw him in that airport, with Jenny, I just felt like everything might be okay again. It had been awhile since I had felt that, and then I had it for a few days. He took me out and I got to spend time with him and Jenny and I just had a great time. And then Jenny called me 'mama'." She paused when she felt Luke's sharp intake of breath, and she gently pulled their intertwined hands up to where Avery was resting quietly on the sheets. "And I just kind of lost it Lucas. I needed to be loved by someone, and Jenny and Jake were my family once, and I was so sure that we could be a family again, so I asked him to marry me, and he said yes." Peyt let out a small sad, laugh when she said this, and she felt a tear on the back of her neck as she was sure Lucas was picturing her future with Jake and Jenny. Because they both knew that she could have been happy.
"What happened?" Lucas asked, bracing himself for the answer, but not quite pulling away from her.
"I said I love you." She shook her head softly, simultaneously running her fingers though her daughters thin hair. "I went to bed and it perfect, and I woke up, and Jake was just looking at me, like something was wrong, and he told me that I said I love you in my sleep. And that we couldn't do this."
"Why would you saying 'I love you' make him change his mind?" Lucas wanted so badly to be mad at her more promising to spend the rest of her life with Jake, and for being happy with a daughter that wasn't his, but he knew that he couldn't be, because Jake had been there for Peyton when he hadn't. Jake had been there when Peyton was so out of control that he was afraid for her, and Jake was there when Lucas was so wrapped up in Brooke and getting Brooke back that he hadn't even looked back at her. So he would have liked to be mad at her, but he couldn't because he knew he owed Jake that much, he knew he owed Peyton that much.
"I said 'I love you Lucas.' Not Jake. I didn't say Jake's name in my sleep, I said yours, and he was so sweet about it. He was heartbroken, but he just told me that I needed to work it out with you, and if I did that and I still wanted him, he would be there. But we both knew that I had to go home, and I had to face what I had been running from ever since Ellie had made me look back at my life a little, and what I really realized during the shooting. I fell back in love with you. Or, more accurately, I stopped pretending that I wasn't in love with you. But Brooke was my best friend and I loved her, love her, and I would never do anything to intentionally hurt her. And I told her that. Right before I told her I was in love with you, and she slapped me. We didn't really talk again until Prom. And that's it. I didn't really talk to him after that, not until I talked to him today about signing with my label."
Lucas sighed, pulling his wife closer to him, careful not to disrupt the sleeping infant lying between them. Sighing, he kissed the top of her head, letting his lips linger for a moment before he pulled away and left the room shrouded in silence.
"I'm sorry." He finally said, and Peyton could almost see the contemplating look on his face. "I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you after the shooting."
"Lucas, you had more going on than I did."
"No, after. I made time for Brooke. But not you." He was silent for another few minutes before he began to speak again. "So, since we're sharing about near marriages, we should probably talk about Lindsay and me. And you and me." He tried to put some humor into the conversation, but they both knew that this was going to be a heavy night. They had been married for a year, and they had still not actually talked about the editor living downstairs, or their breakup. It had just been taboo, and even though they knew that they had to talk about it sometime, it had just never seemed like the correct time.
Peyton nodded, moving to get up before her husband started talking. "I'm going to go put Avery to bed. It's two in the morning. Actually, we should probably feed them." Lucas nodded and got up after his wife, carefully trying to get Bailey out of her crib while Peyton did the same with Brody.
The triplets midnight bottle wasn't something that normally was particularly painful for Peyton and Lucas. Getting up was never fun, but once there downstairs actually holding them, laughing with each other, it was the only pure family time that they had these days, and it was normally quite enjoyable. Not today. Today it was tense. Peyton was the one who finally spoke again, after all three infants had been put back to bed, and she and Lucas were alone in the living room. She hesitantly slid into his lap, smiling with relief when she felt Lucas' arms wrap around her.
"This isn't going to change anything, is it?" She whispered, afraid to look him in the eye because she was happy, and happy wasn't something that she had previously been a lot of. She would gladly vouch to not have this conversation if having it meant that she couldn't be happy anymore.
"Peyton, I love you. That's never going to change." He said simply. He couldn't speak for her, but this conversation, well, he wasn't going to let it change how much he loved her.
She nodded slowly before she finally said the four words that had been on the tip of her tongue, burning it nearly, for the past year. She didn't want to bring it up so soon, she was planning on leading up to it, but she needed to know. Now. "You said 'I Do'." He had been expecting that, and he pulled her closer to him, waiting for her to continue, like he knew she would. "You stood in front of all our friends and promised to spend your life with her."
"I was stupid." He said simply, "I was stupid and scared, and afraid that if I didn't play it safe then I would end up where my heart was telling me to go- with you. And that scared me more than anything because it is so much easier to have someone's heart than to give yours. I'm sorry, and I will work my entire life if I have to prove that it's you and our kids that I chose because I did chose you." He was standing by this point and he continued talking before she could even ask the question that he knew was coming. "And about the ring, your ring, honestly, I came home from that night at TRIC with every intention of spending the night alone, thinking, but when I got there, she had done laundry and she had found the box that I kept in the bottom of the sock drawer, and she assumed it was for her. You know, because why on earth would I keep the engagement ring from the last time I proposed to someone? She was safe Peyt. She was safe because she couldn't break my heart if she never had it. And I knew that. I knew that she couldn't have my heart if you still did. Every single part of me knew that I loved her, but I will always be in love with you. And I was a coward for knowing that and running. And I'm sorry." There were tears falling down both their faces by the time Peyton finally looked up at him.
"You know you put me though hell that year, right Lucas Scott?"
"Yeah. I'm sorry Peyton. That's all I'll ever be able to say because it is so true. I love you and I'm sorry that I promised to wait for you and I didn't."
Peyton Scott looked up at her husband and in one moment of complete clarity knew that it didn't matter. It didn't matter why or what had gotten them here, it just mattered that they were here, together. "I'm beat Luke. Let's go to bed." She smiled when he took her hand, pulling her up and carried her bridal style up to their bed room.
October 5th, 2012
Tree Hill, North Carolina
Red Bedroom Records
Peyton Scott sighed, running her fingers though her long blonde hair and then bouncing her daughter in her lap as she paced around her office, past an amused looking Lucas, holding Brody, and a sleeping Bailey in her bouncer.
"Peyt," Lucas laughed, rolling his eyes at his overly nervous wife, "It's Jake. Stop worrying."
Peyton glared at him, her head suddenly snapping to the side when she heard the door open, and she was sure that she nearly screamed when she saw him. Because he was Jake and they would always be friends.
"Well, if it isn't Miss Peyton Sawyer." Jake said, walking into the door way, eyebrows rising when he saw the family in front of him.
"It isn't, actually." She smirked. "Peyton Scott."
"Well congratulations you two. I always knew you'd be together." Not even Lucas, who was looking for it as if his life depended on it, could find any trace of insincerity in his statement or the hugs that he gave Peyton and Lucas. "And who are these three adorable little kids?" He asked, laughing. "Nathan and Haley had three?"
"No, actually, they're ours. They're just about five months. Bailey Elisabeth is the one in the sleeping bouncer," Peyton laughed as she pointed out the oldest of her children to a stunned Jake, "Brody Keith is in Lucas' arms, and this little girl is Avery Anna."
"And they're all ours.' Lucas interrupted, both Lucas and Jake laughing at the comment, which brought them both back to Lucas and Jenny's first meeting.
"They're adorable." Jake said, smiling at the happy couple, "And speaking of that, I think you guys remember Jenny." Peyton jaw dropped as she saw the little blonde haired girl come running into the room, hiding behind her father. And it nearly broke her heart to see the little girl who had once thought of her as a mother be afraid of her. "It's okay Jen, you remember Peyt." Jake instructed, and almost as if by magic, Jenny's brilliant brown eyes shot open, and she smiled at the woman.
" 'Lo. I'm Jen." She said quietly.
"I know baby." Peyton said, laughing. "I'm Peyton and this is Lucas, and we've known you since you were born honey."
"I was the first one to meet you." Lucas said, proudly.
"But I loved you more." Peyton argued, laughing when Jake and Lucas both rolled their eyes at her. "So where are you and Jenny staying?"
"Down at the motel until I can grab an apartment. This was all really sudden, so I didn't have time to get a real place."
Lucas smiled, and Peyton was positive that she wasn't a big fan of that smirk. "Well, Jake, you're staying with us then. We still have two open guest rooms, and we would love to have you in them." He smirked, turning to his wife. "If you can invite my ex-fiancée and her kid to live with us, I can invite yours." He laughed as he kissed her quickly, and then they both laughed more when they saw Jake's face.
"Long story, but we would love to have you."
"Well okay then." Jake agreed, laughing.
A/N: I'm thinking that they need a bigger house. That might be next chapter. Yeah, I couldn't resist the awkwardness of having them all together. Yea, okay so this chapter was really a response to the amazing episode last week (which I really only disliked because Peyton just so simply forgave him), I thought that this was a conversation that they needed to have and so I made them have it. Review please. 80 would make my entire week and I'll try to post once more this weekend. Thanks!