Title: Love me When I'm Gone
Author: Illuma
Fandom: Magic Knight Rayearth
Rating: T
Warnings: None that I can think. Just a lot of reading?
Characters: Hikaru, Lantis, Umi, Fuu, Ferio, Ascot, Caldina, Lafarga, Presea, Satoru, Masaru, Kakeru
Feedback: Feedback is always welcome!
Summary: Hikaru has a secret she's been keeping from everyone. After the last time they were summoned to Cephiro, they found a way to bring Lantis, Ferio, Ascot, Caldina, Lafarga, and Presea to Earth. They all thought they'd have a happy ending. They all thought everything would be alright.

A little over one year after their return, Hikaru had gone to her new doctor for a routine visit. It was at that visit that she found out about her sickness. She suffered in silence with it for eight years, not telling her beloved friends. The only people that knew, was her family. She couldn't bear telling anyone else. How long did she have before she would have to leave this world, and her loved ones behind? For now… only time will tell.
Author's Notes: Nyah nyah. Okay umm... now that I think about it, this story isn't going to be very long is it? Oh well. As long as you all like it who cares right? n-n Anyways! So far I haven't lost my muse for the story. Hope I won't because this is actually entertaining me. Side note: edited the summary a little. x3 Eh. I have to fix it in the prologue to. So much work!

Enjoy. n-n

Oh yes. Most of the information I used can be found at I do not own the characters of Magic Knight Rayearth. They belong to CLAMP. Fear them! Kay not really.

Chapter 1
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Lantis sighed as he looked down at his sleeping fiancé. She looked so peaceful lying there. He could only wonder what she had been thinking about last night. He doubted she'd tell him. She always kept everything to herself. His head turned when he heard the phone ringing out in the hallway. He wondered who would be calling this early in the morning. He shrugged and left the bedroom to answer it. it rang only twice before the answering machine picked up before he could get to the phone. He muttered something under his voice but stopped when he heard a woman's voice.

"Ohayō gozaimasu. I'm calling for Shidou Hikaru from Doctor Hitari's office. I'd like to remind you that you have an appointment tomorrow morning at 9am. Doctor Hitari would also appreciate it if she's not late again like last time," the woman said, pausing for a moment before she continued. "Doctor Hitari would also like to know whom you've told. Please be prepared to answer all of her questions." There was a moment of silence before Lantis heard a click, signaling that the woman had hung up on the other end.

Lantis stared at the answering machine, wondering what she had meant about "whom she had told." There was obviously something important Hikaru was keeping from him. He wanted to know what it was. He wasn't going to let Hikaru know that he'd heard the message about her appointment. He hadn't even known about it in the first place. He'd ask her about it later. For now he had to leave. He'd already showered and gotten ready for work. He had only wanted to watch her for a few moments before leaving. Sighing once more, he grabbed his keys off of the table by the door and left, locking the door behind him.

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Hikaru rolled over onto her stomach when her alarm clock started going off. The beeping loud in her ears. With a groan, she hit the top of it, aiming for the snooze button to make it stop. She missed a few times before the beeping finally stopped. She didn't want to get up. Not yet anyways. She sighed heavily as she resigned to getting up anyways. She'd have to sooner or later anyways. She had to go to 'work,' as some might call it. She'd actually left her job three weeks ago, not telling anyone except her brothers. They understood her reason for quitting. They knew it was her own choice to do so, and it was her choice as to when she would tell her friends about her sickness. It was all only a matter of time before it came out.

Hikaru yawned as her feet hit the floor and she slowly rose to her feet. She ran a hand through her red hair as she headed towards the bathroom to take a shower. she did it fast. She had to or she would have been late to where she was going. She dressed quickly after her shower. She'd get something eat there. When she entered the living room, she noticed the flashing answering machine. Who had called?

She shrugged and went to play it. She might as well know who it was. When the woman said "Doctor Hitari would also like to know whom you've told," she sighed. She only hoped Lantis hadn't heard the message before he'd left for work. She wasn't ready to tell him just yet. When it finished, she deleted the message. If Lantis hadn't heard about her appointment, she sure as hell didn't want him to when he got home. The only ones who knew she was going were her brothers and she wanted to keep it that way for now.

As she grabbed her keys before going out, her mind drifted back to the days she had been in Cephiro. With her precious friends she had fought to save Cephiro. A land she had come to love. She'd been so strong for everyone. A smile drifted across her face as she thought about everything that had happened there. Everything she'd gone through with her friends, she'd never forget.

But when she first found out, she'd only been going in for a routine checkup with her new doctor, Doctor Hitari, and it had really only been a year after their last visit to Cephiro. She'd been diagnosed with Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia (CML), a slow-growing cancer of the white blood cells- also sometimes called chronic myeloid, chronic granulocytic or chronic myelocytic leukemia. Hitari had told her that CML was a common leukemia. CML patients have bone marrow that makes too many white blood cells. CML is caused by a change in the genetic code of some of the cells in the bone marrow. In these cells, part of chromosome 9 moves to chromosome 22. This creates an abnormal chromosome called the Philadelphia chromosome. The Philadelphia chromosome makes an enzyme (called tyrosine kinase) that signals the body to make too many white blood cells. Doctors do not know what causes the Philadelphia chromosome to appear. Hitari told her that CML had three phases, and most patients were diagnosed in the first phase, called the chronic phase. It can develop over time into the second (accelerated) and the third (blast) phase. In the chronic phase, there are more white blood cells in the blood and bone marrow than usual. Most are mature cells that can work normally. Depending on treatment, the chronic phase may last two to five years or more before turning into the accelerated phase. The symptoms of chronic phase CML depend on how high the person's white blood cell count is. Often, people do not notice any symptoms at all. Hikaru had been one of those and her CML had been found during that very routine doctor's visit.

Hikaru withdrew from the painful memories and left the apartment. Keys in hand, she locked the door behind her and headed towards the elevator. For the past eight years she'd had this sickness. For the first five she'd been going through what was known as the chronic phase, experiencing fatigue, headaches, and pain or the feeling of fullness on the left side of her abdomen. After that, she'd been lucky to hide the symptoms from Lantis and everyone else, but she had had frequent visits to Doctor Hitari's office. She'd have fevers, night sweats where she'd wake up in the middle of the night, cold clammy and uncomfortable, her clothes soaked and the bed sheets clinging to her. And worst of all, by the time she'd get up, change her clothes, change the sheets and snuggle under the blankets again, she'd be wide awake. Most of the time, it was impossible to get back to sleep.

The other symptoms of the Accelerated Phase included weight loss and shortness of breath and pale skin caused by anemia (too few red blood cells). She hid the weight loss by wearing loose clothing. When she was short of breath she'd turn it into a fake coughing fit until she felt she could breath normally again. Hiding the paleness when it occurred was a bit harder. She'd taken to wearing cover-up when her CML had reached that phase and she went pale. In this phase those symptoms were more noticeable than those in the Chronic Stage, and that much harder for her to hide.

When she first found out, she'd only had enough courage to tell her family. Her beloved friends, she couldn't bring herself to tell them. There would have been too much pain, and even now there would be more pain when she told them. She didn't know if she could handle it. Hitari had told her that she was no longer responding to treatments. Tomorrow would be the last time she'd visit Hitari-san. After that, there wouldn't really be any reason to keep seeing her. What would the point have been?

"I… I'll tell him tonight," she said softly to herself, leaning against one wall of the elevator. "I'll tell them all tonight. They have to know. I have to tell them. I can't keep hiding it from them." Hikaru lifted her head and looked at the ceiling of the elevator. "It'll be hard. But they must know. It's not my secret to keep. It never should have been."

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Lantis sighed as he glanced at his watch. Hikaru had called him earlier saying she needed to talk to him about something tonight. She had told him to meet her at her family's home. He was curious to know what it was. He had tried to ask, but all she had said was that it was very important that he come. She had said to be there by six pm. He wanted to ask more, but she had already hung up on him. All he could do was wonder.

It wasn't till about an hour later till he could finally leave. He waved to some of his coworkers before leaving the office, heading for the parking structure where he'd parked his car that morning. When he reached his car, he unlocked the door and tossed his things onto the passenger seat. He quickly got into driver's seat, started the car and headed off towards the Shidou Dojo. He'd been there several times before, so he knew the way.

But the surprise to him when he finally arrived was that there were other cars parked out front. He recognized them and knew whom they belonged to. As soon as he had stepped out of his car, the gates opened and he saw Hikaru's oldest brother, Satoru, standing there, as if he'd been waiting for him.

"Come in," he said. Lantis looked at him, locked his car and followed him inside, the gates closing behind them.

"What's all this about?" Lantis asked as he followed Satoru.

"All will be explained inside," he said quietly, not saying another word. His sister had been the one to call them all, and she wanted to tell them.

"Konban wa, Lantis," said a voice from inside as the door slid open. He recognized it as Fuu's.

"Konban wa, Fuu," he said as he followed Satoru inside. He glanced to one side and noticed Hikaru's other brothers, Masaru and Kakeru were kneeling in the doorway, solemn looks on their faces.

Satoru started to say something but stopped when he heard Hikaru calling his name. He rose to his feet and quickly left the room to go to her. They heard him say yes to her. That they were all there, waiting. They heard two sets of footsteps coming towards the room. Satoru returned and knelt down by his brother, Kakeru.

They looked up when Hikaru came in, one hand on the doorway to hold herself up. She wouldn't look up at them, keeping her eyes down. She took a moment to lower herself into a kneeling position. She still wouldn't look at them when she started to speak.

"I… I have something to tell you. I've been keeping this from you all for far too long, and it's time you knew. Before it became too hard for me to say." She paused for a few moments before she could try to continue. But it was hard for her, and before she could continue, the stress and worry that had been building up in her, caused her to faint, her body falling sideways onto the floor, the last thing she saw before she sank into the darkness of sleep were her brother's faces and her beloved's.