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Close to You
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What Hurts the Most
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'I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house, that don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry'
Charlotte Charles, better known as the girl named Chuck, sat in a booth of the newly opened Bitter Sweets Candy Emporium, doing her best to push back the undeniable tears that were freely falling down her face. The crisp song whispering in the background didn't make Chuck's predicament any easier.
'Stupid song…' she thought. 'It isn't making anything easier.'
A powdered pink and baby blue glove shot in front of Chuck's face, holding a single piece of iconic taffy. Dilly Balsam gave Chuck a sweet, but understanding look.
"Candy?"
Chuck softly shook her head no, and wiped away the bitter tears that were falling.
'Every once in a while even though goin' on with you gone still upsets me
There are days
Every now and again I pretend I'm okay
but that's not what gets me'
The Candy Maker took a seat across from the girl named Chuck, with her hands holding the piece of taffy wide open.
"You know, the first thing I did after my brother died, was eat a piece of taffy. Eating a piece of taffy is what inspired me to start my business, but I also eat it when I'm in times of trouble. It helps me remind me that life can never be sugar coated, and no matter what we do, it'll always be bitter. And every time I eat even a single piece, it reminds me how strong I am, living in this crappy life, and I'm still able to go on. All that by eating this little bit of taffy. It really gives the word Bitter Sweets it's rightful meaning, doesn't it?"
Chuck sniffed and took the piece of candy from Dilly's hands, unwrapped it, and popped it in her mouth. Chewing quickly with small salty waterfalls streaming her face.
Dilly softly smiled and folded her hands. "You're welcome, Charlotte."
'What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin' you walk away'
The broken-hearted girl swallowed her piece of taffy, doing her best to ignore the song flowing through the air, and shifted her eyes towards her unlikely ally.
"He kissed Olive, Dilly. She kissed back… I don't know why, w-why would Ned-, I don't understand. HE kissed HER, I thought, I thought…"
"He loved you?"
No words came out of Chuck's mouth, and shook her head 'yes', sadly.
Chuck took a deep breath and looked downwards.
"He- He knew I loved him, and he said he loved me, and cared about me. I said, I said that I had to hate him for a little bit …. cause of something he did, and I couldn't talk to him for a while…. Is is that why he kissed Olive? Cause he couldn't kiss me, because he can't kiss me?"
Dilly gently took Charlotte Charles hands, and looked her in the eyes.
"What do you mean he can't kiss you?"
The girl named Chuck sniffed, and looked back at Dilly, debating in her mind if she should tell her Ned's biggest secret.
'Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do'
"It's-It's a long story Dilly. I-"
The Candy Maker smiled sympathetically, and gave Chuck a kind look. " I understand. You don't have to tell me. Something happened, and it made Ned want to kiss your friend, right?"
Chuck nodded. "That's it in a nutshell."
"Did you know Olive liked Ned? At all?"
"Well, I knew she admired him, I-I thought, I didn't know she loved him, liked him, maybe?"
She sighed sadly, and Dilly patted her hands. "It looks like to me, that I'm not the one you should be talking about this to."
"But Dilly, what am I supposed to say? 'Hey Ned, I saw you kissing Olive, tell me why?'"
"Actually, yes. That seems like a good start to me."
"Dilly, I can't! I can't face him! I pushed him away, I can't talk-"
"You love him don't you?"
'It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere i go
But I'm doin' it
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends
and I'm alone'
"…Yeah…"
"And you want to know why he kissed Olive, even when YOU know that he loves you, right?"
'Still harder getting up,
getting dressed,
living with this regret
But I know if I could do it over'
"Of course I do!"
"Then you have every right to march right over to his apartment, push him on a sofa, and ask him, right to his face, 'why'."
Dilly grabbed Chuck's hand, pulled her up, and dragged her over to the emporium's door.
"Dealing with a loss is one of the worst things that can happen. But if you have the power to change it, to make it better, then you have to do anything you can. Anger, self-blame, and revenge isn't the way. don't make the same mistake I did."
She opened the door, and unbeknownst to Chuck at the time, she put a piece of taffy in her pocket and lightly shoved her out and down the stairs. Dilly leaned against the doorframe and smiled.
"Now go set things straight."
Still filled with tears, Chuck gave a thankful smile to The Candy Maker.
"Thank you, Dilly."
And with that, Chuck broke into a sprint towards The Piemaker's home.
'I would trade,
give away
all the words that I saved in my heart
that I left unspoken'
8:00 pm.
Ned worryingly looked at his watch every ten seconds, as paranoid thoughts flew in and out of his brain.
Where was Chuck? Did she see? Does she still hate me? Did I make a mistake? Did I? No yes, maybe-
"Ned?"
Reacting to his name, he turned on his heels to find Chuck standing behind him, with slightly red eyes. To him, that could only imply one thing.
"Oh god, Chuck, you-you-"
"Yeah, Ned. I saw you kiss Olive. I saw Olive kiss you back. I saw."
"Chuck listen, I-"
"It's, it's fine Ned. I know why you kissed her."
Ned cocked his head and his eyebrows sunk low. "You-you do?"
"Uh huh. You kissed her, because you needed a real kiss. You needed a real person. Not a fake one. You needed someone to hold, to touch, and you couldn't do that with me."
'What hurts the most, is being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin' you walk away'
"Chuck! That's not-"
"No Ned, it is true. I know you don't like touching people, but when you're with someone you suddenly get the need to touch someone. How do you think I feel, huh? I loved you, I cared about you, and I couldn't touch you! I didn't go kissing Oscar did I? I was just happy to be with you. And what do you do? You kiss Olive. I know, I know I said I couldn't talk to you for a while, but I was about to go forgive you! You wouldn't even let be mad, you wouldn't let me forgive you, and you kiss Olive."
"Chuck, I cannot say enough, that I'm sorry. I know it was wrong, but at the moment, Olive needed someone to be with her. And so did I.
'Never knowing, what could have been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was trying to do'
To Chuck's dismay, the same song she heard at the Candy Emporium was playing softly in the background as well. Its barely audible words pierced the heart-breaking silence.
"Do you love her?"
Ned sighed and looked Chuck in the eyes with a sad pleading look.
Of course I love her. I love you, Olive, even Emerson. You're all my family, and I can't lose my family, not again. Please Chuck, I'm sorry. Can you forgive me one more time? I really don't like making people upset."
"Really? Lately you've had a knack for it."
"I KNOW I know… trust me I never intended it for it to be like that."
"…. I don't know Ned. I just don't know. You're the that said that you only need me for you to be happy. I thought that too. You know, after I saw you kissing Olive, I talked to Dilly. I could have told her your biggest secret. But I didn't. I still cared about you. Even with our, amazingly impossible relationship, even after seeing you happily kiss Olive. I still cared. Because I knew… I knew you needed to touch someone. Only I wish it was me."
"Chuck.."
'What hurts the most, was being so close
And having so much to say
And watchin' you walk away'
"Here, I have something for you, Ned."
She reached into her pocket, and took out the taffy that Dilly had placed in there. She grabbed Ned's hand with a nearby towel, and put the piece of taffy in it.
"It's a little reminder that life can never be sugar coated. No matter what we do, it'll always be bitter. Take that as you will. I'm going to bed."
Not giving Ned a chance to reply, Chuck stormed off the bedroom and shut the door behind her.
And in that single moment, The Piemaker understood better than he ever had before on how Chuck had felt.
This time, he was the one who utterly felt, very far away.
'And never knowing, what could have been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do'
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