Chapter 10: Connect

The killings escalated over the next week. New criminals died everyday, in numbers too vast to be done by one person alone. Light had taken to keeping a map, with small marks on it indicating where killings had been concentrated. His latest theory was that there were at least six people, each taking a different continent. There was no other explanation for the huge numbers of dead criminals.

L had stopped watching TV altogether. The news continued to report the deaths daily, and when they weren't discussing who had been killed, they were discussing why Kira had chosen now to return. Already, there was a cult in Nagano stating that Kira wasn't a person; he was a true god that rose when humanity had reached the peak of vileness. They went on to say that people needed to repent, or become victims of Kira's righteous judgment. All of this, even though Near's victory seventeen years ago had proved that Kira was just a man. Watching it all was making L feel sick. It seemed as though Japan was at the center of it all, probably because Kira had originally come from Japan.

You are in the Kanto region of Japan, and your first victim was nothing more than an experiment to test your powers!

L took a bite of his cake, sighing. The world was falling more and more into confusion, and L could only watch and wish he couldn't see.

Light came over, sitting down next to him. "I'm trying to pinpoint a pattern in the times the victims die, to get a relative idea if they're all being done from the same time zone. Like here. Want to help?"

"No." L said, through a mouthful of cake. "I do not. I told you before, I do not want to be involved with this."

Light stared at him a second. "We have to be involved, whether you like it or not. We're the only ones who know what's going on!" He knew that that was only part of the reason he wanted to help. He still felt guilty, especially since they were using the name he created. He wanted to end what he had started over twenty years ago, and put 'Kira' to rest forever.

"I am not L anymore, Light-kun!" L snapped. "Not the one whose responsibility this would be. Let Interpol and the real L handle this. Besides, if Near is still L at this point, he knows full well what has happened! Let him handle it!"

"Does he know that Kira is in Japan? Does he have a name? Taro Kagami! Emi! Whoever they are, your precious Near doesn't know about them!" Light said loudly.

L ignored him, grabbing his laptop from the table and opening it to check his e-mail. He clicked through the useless things sent to him before finding one from his parents. Raising an eyebrow, he opened it and read it quickly to himself. Light was glaring, upset at being ignored. L finally looked up, smiling to himself. "My parents want me to come home and visit."

"Do they?" Light asked. "I guess that's good…" He felt slightly thrown by how abruptly the topic had changed. L had managed to completely throw off the nice argument he had been preparing.

"Yes. I haven't seen them in a few months. It would be good to go home, just for a bit. My mother's birthday is in about a week." L said. "I'll have the money, once I finish this recent translation I've been working on…" He got up, setting the laptop aside and wandering into the kitchen. Picking a sugar cube out of the bowl, he was silent for a long while, apparently lost in thought. Light stared at him, watching curiously as different expressions flicked across the other's features. Finally, L murmured softly, "Light-kun?"

"Yeah?"

L frowned at the sugar bowl. "When I return to France, I believe I will remain there. It is easy enough to find translation jobs no matter where you live, after all…"

Light stared at him, mouth hanging open in shock. "What?!" He couldn't believe what L had just said. "You're just going to leave, and not come back?"

"That's right." L said. "Like I have repeated many times by this point, I do not want to be involved in this, and living in the center of the city where it's happening is going to throw me into it whether I want to or not."

"What if the European Kira is in France?" Light asked. "You'll still be involved, no matter where you go!"

"Oh, do they have titles now? Differences by continent? Did you abandon your theory of all of them being in Japan?" L frowned harder. "Staying here would be stupid, especially if you're going to continue your crusade against Kira." He moved to walk towards the front door, adding only, "I'm going for a walk." He reached for the doorknob, but Light suddenly moved and grabbed him by the shoulders. L froze, staring at him in confusion. "What are you doing? Let go." He refused to show his true discomfort with Light grabbing him like that.

"You know what you're doing?" Light asked harshly, ignoring L's request. "You're running away, that's what you're doing. I never knew you were such a coward."

"Let go of me."

"No! You're going to hear me out." Light refused to let him move. L blinked, staring up into Light's face and noting the flicker of bloody crimson that tainted his mahogany eyes. This was the Light he remembered, Light Yagami, shining through. Light leaned forward slightly, growling, "You called me your best friend the other day. If that's true, I don't see how you can just walk out of here, content to leave this to me and never see me again. Honestly, L! You're running! You're scared! I don't know what's gotten into you!"

L glared at him. "What's gotten into me? You don't know what you're talking about!" He wrenched backwards, freeing his shoulders from Light's grasp, ducking down and propelling his foot straight up into Light's chest. The other boy went flying backwards, and L felt the phantom sensation of an illusionary handcuff around his wrist. This time around, he was not yanked forward as well, but merely watched as Light hit the sofa hard, the feeling of handcuffs being only a part of his memory. He stormed forward, staring down at the boy angrily. "I sacrificed my life to catch Kira, Light-kun! Gave up my place in this world for that case! Did I deserve what you gave me, a death at the end of a Shinigami's pen because you were too scared to show me what you really were? Too scared to come out and confront me openly, drag my name out of me, or even kill me yourself, without your notebook! My life was cases, Light-kun. Living in front of a computer to solve puzzles because it was all I knew how to do; the only way I knew how to live. I went up against Kira and died with a life unfulfilled. I missed so much. I'm not going to do that again. Not when I've been given a second chance. I won't fight something that will get me killed."

Light was still on the sofa, breathing heavily with a hand to his ribs. "You promised me once… that you would teach me to do that…" he wheezed. "I remember that…"

"That was when you were my friend, Light-kun." L said sharply. "One friend, I had, and he turned out to be Kira. Lucky me!" He laughed bitterly. "Kira was evil! A demon! As much of a God of Death as those Shinigami; bored, foolish, and in it for themselves!"

"Well I'm not Kira now!" Light shouted, still slightly out of breath. He forced himself to his feet, slamming into L and crushing the smaller boy up against the wall, grabbing L's arms so that he couldn't force him away. "You don't think that I ruined my own life by being Kira? The only good thing that came out of it was meeting you! Killing you was probably the worst mistake I ever made!" Light was past the point of considering what was coming out of his mouth, drawing ever-closer to the taboo memories he had promised himself not to consider. "I was miserable without you there to challenge me, fight me… work with me and against me… I was bored, just like those damn Shinigami!"

L squirmed, but the wall prevented him from ducking away and kicking him again. He wriggled uselessly, finally stopping altogether and glaring at Light, cursing the other for being sturdier, able to hold him so effectively. "At least you realize how stupid your actions were!"

"I let you die… I let Rem kill you… I let you leave me…!" Light hissed. "I'm not letting you leave me again!"

All the anger suddenly drained from L, leaving nothing but confusion in its wake. He stared at the boy pinning him to a wall, puzzled beyond belief. "What?"

"You said Kira was a God of Death?" Light asked softly. L nodded, unsure what the other was planning. Light grinned suddenly, and L suddenly recognized the real Light Yagami in Light Kagayaki's eyes, the one untainted by Kira. The one who had been L's friend. Light leaned in, beginning softly, "L, do you know…?" He felt, more than saw, L tense in his grasp at the words. The ex-detective remembered the first time he had heard those words, and the long mental war that had followed. Light met L's eyes purposefully, saying in a quiet voice, "L, do you know, a God of Death loved you?" And he pressed his lips to L's.

L froze completely. He didn't move, didn't react. Just stopped moving. Light pulled back and looked at him for a second, looking for some kind of emotion or reaction. Finding none, he let go of L's arms and walked over to sit back on the sofa. L stood for another moment, then walked slowly to a chair and sat down.

"Why would you…?" he tried to ask.

Light tipped his head back, resting it on the back of the sofa and staring at the ceiling. "Because I let you provoke me."

L stared at him. "You kissed me because I provoked you?" His voice held incredulity. "So it meant nothing?"

"I didn't say that." Light continued to stare at the ceiling. "I wasn't going to go into that. Certainly not now. Probably not ever. But I was upset, and you were going to leave…"

L pulled his knees to his chest, trying to figure out what Light was trying to say. "You don't want me to leave." he theorized.

Light shifted to look over at L. "I remembered." he said simply. "When I wasn't Kira, when we worked together to catch the Third Kira, I… I guess I had a crush on you, to put it in the terms of the stupid and the high-school-aged."

"We're high-school aged." L pointed out.

"Yeah. That makes it appropriate, then." Light rolled his eyes. "Anyway, I never would have acted on it. You thought I was Kira, and you were L. Can you imagine the problems there?" L blinked. Oh, the things that could have gone wrong. Light grinned. "So when I regained my memories, and Rem killed you, that was about the time I realized that it really wasn't going to be possible to function without you around. I was miserable after you died. Kira was glad as all hell, but I was miserable."

"And you still…?"

"Can't function without you? Yes." Light replied. "I don't know why, but I'm too attached to you to let you leave me again."

L was silent a moment, thinking about everything Light had said. One word stuck out at him in particular, and he voiced it curiously. "Love…?"

Light winced. "Umm… I'm assuming that's a short way to say 'can't function without you'." He looked back up at the ceiling. "Damn it, this was why I never intended to say anything. You're so annoying, Ryuzaki!" With the name floating at the forefront of his memory, it came out without thought.

L laughed. "Ryuzaki?" Obviously Light's memory was functioning against him in this instance. "Not anymore. Try again, Light-kun."

Light sat up, a half-hearted glare focused on L. "Fine. You're so annoying, Lawliet." He smirked. "I guess that still has to stay a big secret, since we have another Kira running around."

"You can call me that if you want to." L said. "Not in public, though. Most people can't even say it properly." He blinked then. "So what do we do about…?"

Light continued to smirk. "We roll with it. If you want to, Lawliet." He got up, walking over and kissing L on the nose before heading for the kitchen. "Come on, I need coffee."

L followed him. "That's a good answer, but that's not what I was asking about. I meant Kira."

"Oh, you want to help now?"

"I considered it…" L admitted. "We can't keep running from what we were."

"I'm not running. You are." Light spooned coffee into the coffee maker.

"Yes, you are. You're trying to smother the guilt by trying to solve this. Don't lie." L stated bluntly. "Anyway, I have to accept what I was. I'll go home to Lyon for a few days; you can come if you want and then we can work on this."

"Sounds good. I think… Wait, Lyon?"

"Yes. So?"

"The Interpol headquarters is in Lyon. Isn't there an Interpol meeting in a week or two about the killings?" Light turned to look at L. "Obviously L's representative would be there. If we could get to Near, or whoever L is at the moment, we could tell them about Kira being in Japan again."

Realization dawned on L. "You're right. That has maybe a forty percent chance of working, but it's worth a try. I'll write back to my parents." He scurried off to grab his laptop. Light poured himself a cup of coffee, pouring one for L as well and adding nine sugar cubes. He couldn't help but grin behind the ex-detective's back.

L had used percentages again.

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This chapter didn't want to END. It just went ON and ON and ON… Seriously. I wanted to end when Light kissed him, you know, cliffie and all. But nooooo… There had to be an explanation, and then I remembered that the chapter was originally supposed to end with the stuff about Interpol and Lyon, and added that on too. Bleh…

So they both accept their memories and all is good. I can write L as L again, for the most part. Light-kun will slowly become more Kira-ish too, but VERY slowly. And Near is on the way! Fun!

Love and hugs! Hope you liked it! You don't know how long I agonized over this, changing parts, rewording parts, adding parts… I wanted it to be perfect. This is my favorite chapter, and I've written up to chapter 13, so that's saying something.

Li