Ch.2

Put me on a ship that is sinking

On a voyage near untamed land

Take away the freedoms I wanted

I understand

Wednesday December 17th:

The next day at school rather than going to meet Grace, Ricky spent his day alone. At lunch though, he walked over to the table where he saw Amy sitting with Ben and their friends, Lauren, Madison, and Henry and Alice. Ricky felt awkward for intruding but after his session with Dr. Steele yesterday evening he felt it was something that needed to be done.

"Can we talk," Ricky said to Amy trying to ignore the stares that the others in the group were giving him.

"Not now," Amy replied trying her best to ignore him.

"Then when? I really want to talk to you. We used to do that remember, just talk."

Amy tried to ignore Ricky's statement. Yes she did remember that they used to talk but at the same time she remembered the night she got pregnant and that changed everything despite the chemistry they had back at band camp.

"Come on, Amy," Ricky pleaded, "Please, what's changed?"

"What's changed?" Amy said staring at him, "I think you know what's changed or haven't you noticed."

"Amy don't do this please. If you want we can talk later with one of your parents around but I really want to talk to you."

Amy shook her head and looked at him. "You're not going to give up on this are you?"

"No I won't and I don't want to. You can believe me or not but the baby is important to me." Ricky then took a deep breath and though he knew he would get some looks for the next part he knew he had to say it anyways, "And so are you."

The group did notice what Ricky said and Amy just looked at him the same way she had when Ricky had come by her house and told her he wanted to be involved.

"Just call me later, okay," Ricky said to her. "I want to be involved, don't shut me out."

Not knowing what else to do, Ricky simply nodded to Amy and the group and then walked away with his hands in his pockets.

"You okay," Ben asked Amy.

"Yeah," Amy replied, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Amy the guy just told you that he not only wants to be a part of the baby's life but yours too."

Amy could see that Ben was a little bit worried. She placed his hand on his.

"I only want one guy in my life. I want you."

"So I don't have to worry? I mean from what he said it sounded like there was more than just that one night at band camp. You weren't like in love with him at one time were you?"

At this point Amy had no choice but to fake a smile. How could Ben ask something like this especially in front of their friends? Now they were all anticipating an answer.

"No," Amy replied, "I wasn't, I wasn't in, in love with Ricky," knowing full well that she had just lied and curiously wondered if anyone else had picked up on it.

Amy's phone suddenly rang and she answered. It was her mother and after hanging up Amy got up from her seat.

"My mom's here, I'll call you later okay."

Ben nodded as Amy trailed off. Her mom had come to pick her up for a doctor's appointment. Today she would be finding out the sex of her baby.

~*~*~*~*~*~

That evening Amy was sitting at the table with her mom. Ashley was spending the night at a friend's house and her father was spending a late night at work.

"You should call him," her mother said.

"Call who?" Amy said knowing very well who she was talking about.

"I think you know. You should call him," she repeated.

"How many times do I have to say I don't want anything to do with that guy?"

"Amy he has a right to know."

"I don't know."

"At least give it a try. Give him a chance to be a part of his daughter's life. Don't let her grow up without a father."

"Fine," Amy said leaving the kitchen.

When she was upstairs in her room she reached for her cell phone on her desk. Her first instincts were to call Ben but at the same time she knew her mother would be asking her how the conversation went with Ricky and she could do the only thing she knew- lie despite the fact that she was a terrible liar. Amy found the piece of paper that held Ricky's cell number and began dialing. Amy had secretly hoped to get Ricky's voicemail so she wouldn't have to talk to him but that turned out not to be the case. Amy had simply asked him to come over but if he were busy then they could just talk tomorrow. Ricky wasn't busy so he went over to Amy's after telling his foster parents. He was trying to be honest with them but it was difficult especially since he didn't talk to them much unless he absolutely had to or unless it was them doing the talking and him just replying.

Within no time Ricky arrived at Amy's house. The two of them sat in the living room much like the first time he had come over.

"I'm glad you called," he said to her. "I wasn't sure if you would or not."

"Well I wasn't."

Ricky nodded understanding, "Your mom thought it would be a good idea."

"Yeah, she grew up without her dad so she knows how important it is."

"Where was he?"

"I'm not sure, my mom never really talks about it. I guess we all have our own secrets."

"Yeah," Ricky said knowing full well the secrets he himself kept hidden. "So what did you call me about?"

"I had a doctor's appointment this afternoon."

"Everything okay," he asked. "With the baby I mean."

Amy nodded. "I found out the baby's gender. I wasn't sure if you wanted to know or not."

"Sure knowing would be good."

Amy reached for a picture that she had hidden under a magazine on the living room table. She handed it to Ricky.

"You can keep that one. From what Dr. Hightower said, we're having a girl."

"A girl," Ricky repeated. He couldn't help but let out a huge smile. Ricky gently traced the clear image of the child on the sonogram picture. "Our daughter," he simply said.

"Yeah," replied Amy. "I don't know I think knowing who this person inside of me- it makes it more real. There's no need to call it the baby anymore."

"I know what you mean. There are days when I try to deny all of this but I can't anymore."

"Yeah, me too," Amy replied softly. "I've tried to pretend that none of this was happening. I mean I'm only fifteen. This is the last thing in the world I wanted but now it's hard not to. There's going to be someone who depends on me."

Ricky nodded. "I'm sorry that this happened Amy, I wish that it hadn't. If I could go back and be more careful then I would have been."

"Why weren't you?"

"I don't know," Ricky said, lying to her knowing full well the reason he hadn't used protection.

He was in love with her simple as that. He had wanted her to feel him the way no other girl had. He had wanted their night together to be intimate and true without the need of covering himself up. Ricky just wasn't ready to tell her the truth. The way Ricky saw it, Amy did know the truth but since getting pregnant she had decided to ignore the feelings she once had for them. Ricky partly wanted to believe that Amy hadn't forgotten completely especially given the fact that he himself hadn't forgotten despite the pregnancy and despite the fact that he had been with Adrian and was now with Grace.

"Again," Ricky said, "I'm very sorry."

"I know," Amy replied. "I am too but I think it's safe for both of us to stop apologizing for this."

"So does this mean we can start being friends and stop hating each other?"

Amy looked at him surprisingly, "You want to be friends?"

"Yeah," Ricky replied.

"Real friends," Amy asked.

"I know I play a lot of games but I don't want to play games with you. If you'll let me I want to be your friend. Not this jerk or tease that I am. I want to be that friend you met at band camp, the guy that genuinely cared about you without a hidden agenda."

Amy looked at Ricky. Though she tried to deeply forget it there was a larger part of her that never could. Back at band camp there had been no games with Ricky. He had been a real good friend and an even greater boyfriend even if it was only for three weeks. He was a nice guy but when they had gotten to school everything had changed. She had avoided him because of their mistake and he had gone back to being the player that people said he was. Amy could see that Ricky was being truthful with her now, the way she had remembered him to be a long time ago. After going back to his player ways she could also see that going back to being the nice guy was a little strenuous for him.

"Okay," Amy said to him.

"Really," Ricky asked a little surprised that she had said yes to them being friends.

"Well the way I see it, things couldn't possibly get worse between us. They probably could if I still chose not to talk to you but that's no longer the case."

"Thanks Amy. Well I should probably get going. I told my fosters that I wouldn't be out that late."

The two of them stood up and started walking towards the door.

"So I'll see you at school tomorrow," Ricky asked.

Amy simply nodded just as Anne Juergens walked into the hallway to check on them.

"Well goodnight," Ricky said to Amy and then to Mrs. Juergens.

"'Night," replied Amy and then closed the door behind him.

"So did you work things out," Anne asked her daughter.

"Yeah, we've decided to be friends."

Anne smiled, "See, you just needed to give him a chance. He can be a good guy when given that chance."

"Yeah, I know." Amy said with a knowing look in her eye.

Anne looked at her daughter puzzlingly, "Is there something you're not telling me about him?"

Amy just stayed silent for a second and then started walking upstairs to her room, "Goodnight mom."

"Goodnight Amy, I love you."

"I love you too."

____________

Author's Note: Once again, I know Dr. Hightower is a Pediatrican but I like her on the show so I changed it so she can be Amy's OBGYN.