Alright! Last Chapter! Brace yourselves!
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or its characters.
Final Task: Finish task 1.
Clean the Hub… Again… Ianto let out a heavy breath. Dear God, I won't survive this, will I?
The Welshman gulped, an image of the biological mess that was residing in the corner appearing in his mind. It was apparently a failed experiment of Owen's, a step up from his coffee mug ones. This one... Ew. That's the only thing that could have described it. Ew.
He knew the new vacuum cleaner he'd bought would be of absolutely no use in this situation. For the next ten minutes, Ianto went on a quest for some sort of weapon to arm himself with against the mass of rotting… stuff. Just like with the cleaning implements, weapons that wouldn't destroy the Hub and all its inhabitants seemed to be very hard to find. He'd have to talk to Jack about that. Later. Ianto did find a sword, though he was a bit hesitant in using it. Luckily, he found something else a moment later.
"A baseball bat?" So, the Hub didn't have any kind of cleaning supplies or things to properly arm oneself against biological experiments, yet it had a rather old-looking baseball bat and weapons of complete and utter destruction (ones that were not to be touched "under any circumstances"). "Wonderful," Ianto muttered bitterly. He swung the bat up, holding it only a small way away from his face. He glared at the bat. He would've preferred a cricket bat. Much better for hitting.
"This will have to do," Ianto groaned, his arms dropping to his sides. He wearily shuffled to where he knew his target was.
Disgusting! The smell of the indescribable heap was sickening. How long has this been here? Ianto shied away from the mass. Uncertainly, the Welshman poked the experiment with the bat. A small shockwave rippled through the flesh-like (or perhaps actual flesh) thing. Some kind of green ooze seeped from huge pores, covering the tip of Ianto's bat. A noise that was very much like a moan emitted from within the lump.
"Oh God!" Ianto gagged, turning away.
"So," Ianto heard. He looked up to see a grinning Owen. "I see you've met Meryl."
"Meryl?" Ianto choked. "You named it?" He cast a revolted look at the pulsating rot.
"Yes, and you're disturbing her," Owen cackled.
"That's disgusting," Ianto spat.
"You're going to hurt her feelings!" Owen was laughing so hard by that point, that he was clutching his abdomen.
"Owen," Ianto heard Suzie call. "Stop being such a twat!" Though the Welshman could only hear half-seriousness in her voice.
Suddenly, the bat seemed to be sucked into the fleshy heap. Ianto was pulled down a bit as the bat sunk in deeper. Some of the ooze squirted onto his already filthy shirt. He could hear Owen's breathless hoots of laughter. By then, the other three team members had come to watch Ianto struggle. They had even descended down to his level for a closer view. Jack seemed amused, as did Suzie. Tosh looked slightly revolted, but curious. Owen was wiping away his tears. Feeling close to wretching, Ianto yanked the bat back to him, pulling it free.
"Oh… Oh God… Tea-boy…" Owen gasped between guffaws.
Ianto narrowed his eyes, glaring at the insensitive medic. He'd had enough! Trying to keep his breathing steady, he managed to say, "I'll be upstairs," without screaming in frustration.
The Welshman harshly threw the bat to the ground. He shoved past Owen and Suzie, "accidentally" pushing the doctor back. Owen lost his balance, tripping over the baseball bat. With a cry of repugnance, Owen landed right in "Meryl". The young man's action hadn't been lost on the others, all of whom realized what he'd done.
Ianto ignored them. He pulled out his pen and notepad. Instead of crossing out the last bit, Ianto furiously scribbled out the whole page. He irately tossed the notebook behind him, not even caring where it went. The fuming Welshman stormed out the cog door, his teammates gaping at him as he left.
Task Ten: I don't even care anymore!
And there it is. Ianto finally had enough, returning to the tourist office to go troll the forums… not really.
I was never planning on it taking this long, but JEEBUS! I'm pretty much satisfied with how everything turned out. Thank you for all of you who actually stuck with me this whole time. I love you all! And for those of you who cared enough, I have all the illustrations up on DeviantArt too!
There's a lesson in all of this… somewhere. Maybe it's: Never, ever piss of Ianto. Ever.
Review, review, review please!