Dead and Dating

Disclaimer: I don't own the Southern Vampires. Sole copyright belongs to Charlaine Harris. I'm poor, please don't sue.

Rating: M

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I woke up at 4am. I was laying on the sofa and felt hands tangled in my hair. My heart skipped a beat. I expected look up and see my viking staring back at me. But it was Pam. She must have picked me up and moved me to the sofa. We were sitting like Eric and I had been. She had pulled my pony-tail out so she could run her fingers through my hair. I lifted my hands up to rub my eyes. They were puffy and swollen from crying. The emotion from earlier started to flood back and I started crying again.

"Shh. Sookie, calm down." Pam was running her fingers through my hair.

"Pam, they have Eric."

"I know."

"When will we know what happened?"

"I don't know. I closed up the bar, but I didn't have the heart to wake you. Do you want to go back to Eric's now?"

I slowly sat up and looked down at my hand. My ring sparkled under the light. I tried to choke back the tears that were coming again. I stood up and tried to collect myself. Pam stood behind me and followed me out the door. Flipping off the light and locking up. Once we were outside I handed her the keys to Eric's corvette. We slid into the car and drove home in complete silence.

Once we got back to the house I kicked my heels off into a corner.

"I have another 45 minutes before I must sleep. Would you like me to stay downstairs with you for a while?" Pam was trying so hard to be considerate that I started crying again. She sat down on the sofa and I sat next to her.

"What will I do if he doesn't come back?"

"You will survive. Eric knows that you will. Sookie, I know I'm...distant sometimes. But we are friends. Eric is not only my maker, but my friend."

"I know Pam. But why does it seem like our love is doomed to fail"

"Maybe you are looking at it wrong. Do you realize after each incident, you guys become closer?"

"I guess."

Pam stood up and gave me a kiss on the forehead. "I must sleep Sookie. I suggest you do the same." I followed her upstairs and went into Eric's room. I said goodnight to Pam and then shut the door behind me. I slid down the door and cried my heart out. I felt like I had been crying for hours. When I looked up at the clock I realized I really had been crying for hours. It was almost 8am. I knew that I was never going to sleep. I stood up and went over to the closet. I stripped off everything I was wearing besides my panties. I reached into the closet and pulled out one of Eric's long button up shirts. I slid it on and buttoned it up. I threw myself over his bed. I reached up to the night stand and picked up our picture. I still couldn't remember where it had been taken. I laid my head onto it and cried. When I went to put it back I seen a note on the table. It was from Eric. I hadn't seen it yesterday. I held onto the envelope almost scared to open it. When I finally got the courage to open it, it was a letter, not just a short note.

Sookie, My love,

If you are reading this I've gone to the tribunal. I know your hurt and maybe a little angry. Just know I am doing everything in my power to come back to you.

I wrote this letter before we left for Fangtasia. So I'm just going to hope and assume that you have your engagement ring on. I'll be dreaming about you, on our wedding day, in a beautiful white gown. You will look lovely. I will try to believe that I will see that day. If I do not, please know, you will be taken care of.

You and Pam will split everything I own. The house, the bar, my monetary assets, everything will be split between you. I have written Pam a similar letter. I want you to let her take care of you. I know she can be difficult, but that is a quality that you both share.

I want to believe I will come back to you. But if I don't. Please don't mourn me forever. You deserve love. It nearly breaks me to think of you with another man, but you deserve someone to love you. You are a treasure Sookie.

If I do come back, please know that I will love you every day for the rest of time. I will make every day count. I know I haven't always been the perfect man but I swear I will try to be.

Please don't cry Sookie. I know you are. But please, try to smile for me.

I love you forever,

Eric

I stared at the note for the longest time. He never signed his notes as Eric, he usually signed them with only an E. But this one was serious. I was just about to set the note back when I felt a horrible stab of pain. It felt like someone had whipped me across my back. I screamed out and held onto the bed. But the pain didn't stop. It felt like I was being whipped over and over again. I laid there in agony. Screaming and crying into the bed. It went on for hours. It stopped briefly, then the pain resumed, this time on my chest. I felt whip after whip over my heart. I clutched my chest and cried. The pain was so horrible I couldn't hold on any longer. I passed out.

~*~

I woke up to Pam shaking me. My face was wet. She had thrown water on me.

"Sookie, Sookie, what happened?"

"I felt like I was being whipped."

"Can you stand?" I tried to stand, every inch of me hurt. Pam walked me over to a mirror. What I seen horrified me. I had welts all over my body. From head to toe. Eric's shirt was soaked in blood.

"P-Pam, what happened?"

"I don't know, Sookie." She bit her bottom lip. I could tell she was lying.

"Pam, please tell me the truth."

"You're feeling Eric's pain. That is normal for bondeds. But not to this extent. Your bond must be stronger than we thought."

"I don't feel anything Pam." I started shaking.

"Does that mean he's gone?"

"I don't know Sookie. We need to get you cleaned up. I called Fangtasia and told them to forget about opening. I can't leave you and go there." She put on hand on my shoulder and guided me to the bathroom. She helped me undress and fill the tub. She helped me in then helped me bath. I didn't have the strength to be embarrassed. When I was done she dried me off and put me in sweat pants and one of Eric's t-shirts.

"Let's go downstairs. I'll brush your hair." I followed her downstairs. I was too numb to do anything but obey. I settled in front of the fireplace and she sat behind me. The clock on the mantle said it was 8pm. I watched the flames of the fireplace dance while Pam brushed my hair and pulled it into a pony-tail.

"Do you want me to try to heal you?"

"No, the bath made me feel a little better."

"It may leave nasty scars."

"I know. I just, I just can't right now Pam."

"You know he'd give his life for you."

"He might be doing that right now." I teared up just thinking about it.

"I do want to marry him Pam. It isn't how I ever imagined it. I thought I'd have children. That I'd have a husband who could push our child on the swing in the sunlight." I sniffled.

"But you know what, it doesn't matter if I never have that. I realized the only thing that matters to me, is that Eric is my family. And you too Pam. You both are the only family I have. My brother betrayed me, my parents died, my Grandmother was murdered, and my Great-Grandfather is a fairy who has no real interest in my life."

I looked up at Pam, searching for a response, bloody tears were dripping down her face, she motioned for me to continue.

"I thought we would be a family. Me, Eric, and you. Now Eric may not ever come home."

I sunk my face into my hands and wept openly. Pam slid herself over so she was next to me and wrapped her arms around me.

"Sookie, you know I am no good at human displays of emotion. But you are family to me, and always will be." She leaned over and kissed my cheek. I leaned my head against her shoulder and cried some more.

We sat there in silence for a while. She didn't dare turn on the t.v. and I wouldn't move. I just watched the flames dance in the fireplace. Suddenly there was a loud knock on the door. I jumped up and answered it. There was a man in black staring at me.

"Ms. Stackhouse?" I nodded, but I knew it wasn't going to be good. I slouched against the door and started crying.

"Ms. Stackhouse, there is something I was sent to give you."

"What is it? Did they send me back his body?" I was choking back tears and fighting the urge to vomit. Pam was taking it all in from behind me. She was rubbing my back. I knew she was crying too.

"No, Sookie, He came to deliver me." I pushed past the guy in the black suit and seen him standing there. He was ragged, his hair matted with blood. He had the same welts over his body that I had. The second I seen him I ran out to him. I ignored the fact that I had no shoes on. I jumped into his arms. We both winced when we bumped our wounds against each other, but we didn't dare move. I put my hands on his face and pressed my lips against him. I was scared to ever move. I came up for air and laid my head on his shoulder.

"Eric.."

"Shh. Just enjoy the moment Sookie."

I was silent. I held onto him tight, swearing to myself that I would never let him go again.

He carried me up the steps and into his house. Pam laid a hand on his shoulder, then made herself scarce. The man in the suit left and it was just me and Eric. He carried me upstairs and into his bedroom. He sat on the edge of his bed. I was wrapped around his waist and I wasn't letting go. He slid his hands up the back of my shirt and felt the welts.

"Sookie, you felt my pain?"

"It was horrible. I have the welts everywhere. What happened?"

"They punished me. They whipped me and beat me. And then I was ordered to pay a very large fine. Considering the alternative, I am grateful for such a light punishment. I had friends among the tribunal. They pleaded my case. It was, after all, self-defense."

"I would hardly call it a light punishment. I felt like I was going to die."

He picked up my hand and looked at the engagement ring.

"You kept it on."

"Of course I did Eric. I love you."

"I love you too."

"You need a shower." I finally climbed off his lap and stood up. I reached down for his hand and he stood with me. We walked down the hall to his bathroom. I stripped him of his tattered clothing, he took off my sweatpants and t-shirt. I turned the warm water on. We both climbed in and clung to each other. There was nothing erotic about this shower. We clung to each other like life lines. Finally Eric let go of me to wash his hair. I gently rinsed out his cuts with warm water and mild soap. Once he was clean he pulled me back to him. We stood there letting the water pour down on us. He put one hand behind my head and held me close to his chest. I wept openly and freely. I let go of all my sadness. We finally got out of the shower and dried off.

Eric carried me into the bedroom and laid me on his bed. He gently spread me out on the bed. The moonlight was streaming into the room and cast a soft glow on the bed.

"Sookie, your so beautiful. And the way the moonlight is shining on you.." He didn't even finish the thought. He crawled on top of me. Gently guiding himself between my legs. He pushed a little at my opening and I wrapped my legs around his waist, guiding him in. That night, with the moonlight shining down on us, we didn't need any words, any moaning. We made love in the most pure form. He held my hands and stared into my eyes as we both climaxed. When we were done he slid off of me and pulled me into his arms. We still hadn't said a word. I gripped him tight. I was so scared that if I let him go, I'd wake up and it would all be a dream. I drifted off to sleep, never loosening my grip on him.

~*~

I woke up at glanced at the clock...3am. Eric was wide awake. I had expected him to be in down time, but he was staring at me. He had one hand cradling my head. The other was over my heart. I slid my hand up and placed it over his.

"Shh, I can feel your heartbeat." I smiled and didn't say a word. After a few minutes he pulled my hand up to his lips and kissed my palms.

"I thought I was going to die Sookie. The only thing that kept me from letting go, was the thought of coming home to you."

"I'm here, you are home."

"I've lived a long life, I've done awful things. What have I ever done to deserve you?"

I smiled. I loved when he talked sweet to me. But I knew he wasn't just saying it. He meant it. Instead of answering I leaned my face up to his and kissed him gently. "Eric.." I breathed into his mouth. "Yes?" He whispered into mine.

"You are my family. You and Pam." He smiled. "What about everyone else?"

"I have plenty of friends, but to me, you and Pam are family."

"Did you tell Pam this?"

"Yes, she said that we would always be family." He laughed a little.

"I see Pam took it easy on you."

"She was amazing."

"I'm starving lover. I don't want to feed so much that I drain you. Can we go downstairs?"

"Sure." We stood and dressed. Eric in a pair of sleep pants and me in a pair of shorts and one of Eric's t-shirts. We made our way downstairs. Pam was sitting at the kitchen table with a bottle of blood in front of her. When she heard us come down she turned around and smiled. It wasn't often you seen Pam genuinely smile, so it was nice.

She stood and bowed to Eric. He would have none of that. He grabbed her hands and hugged her so tight it even surprised her.

"Eric, would you like something to eat?"

"Please." Pam nodded and went to the fridge, she pulled out a bottle of True Blood and heated it in the microwave. Then she boiled water and fixed me some instant coffee. She pulled out sugar and cream and held them up to me.

"I know you can't stand black coffee. You barely drank it the other day." I smiled and fixed my mug of coffee. We all sat at the table together in comfortable silence.

"This is like family." Pam whispered it so low I barely heard her.

"I know." I whispered back and smiled. I finished my cup of coffee and Eric finished his blood. Pam returned to her room.

"Are you ready for bed my love?"

I grinned. "Of course, my big viking?" He picked me up out of my chair and carried me back upstairs. That night we made love many times. Each one better than the last. After the last time Eric whispered in my ear, "Get some sleep. We will have a big night tomorrow evening." I nodded and fell asleep in his arms.

TBC

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Okay, I really swear, I'm trying to stop writing until before vacation. I just can't!