Disclaimer: Of course I don't own Naruto.

Sakura looked up at Sasuke with the patience of a saint, even though her ribs were screaming, her face was bleeding, her hands were numb, and any second now her feet were going to get up and leave her in revolt. She smiled, despite everything, and asked him with infinite sweetness, "Does this mean you don't want to be my boyfriend?" And knocked him on his ass.

Or, would have, if he wasn't too old and crotchety to overreact to stupid questions. Maybe if she was a boy...

Wait. He'd been with Orochimaru. The guy with the tongue who talked like a girl.

So, he didn't take jokes about Itachi, and he didn't take stupid questions. It figured she was without ammunition.

So she nearly jumped out of her skin when he decided to play along and knelt beside her. "I thought you were going to marry my brother." For one second--just one--he sounded like the old Sasuke again. "Didn't you say no one could compare?"

Cue angelic smile. "I'm sure he'd be willing to share. But then again, maybe he wouldn't. You are, after all, the one who betrayed him. But that's a habit of yours now, isn't it? Betray your friends. Even the one who saved your life two weeks ago." She pouted. "I can't even move."

"Then I'll be merciful," he said, and placed her hands over her abdomin. "And let you heal yourself before you die of internal bleeding."

Internal bleeding was a risk, she had to admit, though she watched him irritably as he walked away, unconcerned for his childhood friend whom he almost killed.

He paused, a few feet away. "But we're quit of anything after this. You come after me again...and I will kill you."

"Sasuke-kun," she said in wry amusement, letting her eyes close. "Never make promises you can't keep."

She didn't open her eyes again for a very long time. Inner Sakura had already spirited her away.

She was within her head. She recognized it here now, though she rarely saw it in natural form. Having spent so long with Itachi, she wasn't sure there was a natural form. But apparently there was. Inner Sakura was there with her, which was odd, until she remembered that without Itachi, there was no place else Inner Sakura needed to be.

We're going to die, aren't we? Inner Sakura asked, because that was how Sakura had made her talk. Because they were two, and therefore there was no "I."

"It looks like it," she said. She leaned back against her chair--they were both sitting on one, facing each other, because that was how Sakura was most comfortable. Looking at Inner Sakura, knowing she was there, was how she knew she was not alone.

Are we afraid?

Sakura grinned, and faced the ceiling--or the sky, because there was no ceiling in her head. It was a lot of mist. A place that was meant to hide her, where Itachi couldn't see. "Itachi lied," she said, "because he said we'd die earlier. And we didn't. So I think this is something of a compromise."

Do we want to compromise?

"Not really. 'Cause dying sucks."

Inner Sakura smiled at her now. So why are you here?

And just like that, she'd kicked her out.

My hands hurt, was her first thought. She was looking up into a pair of black eyes, and thought, for less than a fraction of a second, that it was Sasuke. And then realized it was delirium talking, because that was definitely Sai. Who was the last person she would have expected, since Sai wasn't the type of person to rescue her. The only person he'd ever even tried to rescue before was Naruto--Naruto, who always made friends to easily. Her only friend was a mass murderer and missing-nin whose favorite hobby was torturing her, just to see how much she could take.

And Ino. But she didn't count.

Still, this wasn't an alternate universe. He wasn't standing over her looking worried. He looked, as always, bored.

"Wow, I didn't know you cared."

Sarcasm, as always, was the best defense.

Sai glanced at her. "You were dying."

"Almost dying," she corrected. "It's kind of a hobby these days." And, looking down at her arm, the one whose wrist Sasuke broke, she willed it over her abdomin. And then, very methodically, began to mold chakra. And wished that she had enough chakra to manage Sozo Saisei. She didn't know anyone who had that much chakra--except for Naruto. Tsunade, of course, needed a seal. And Sakura wasn't really into that fashion statement right now.

When she decided that she was no longer in danger of internal bleeding, she sat up, and with the utmost sweetness said, "Set this, please." And set her broken wrist right on his scroll.

Oh, she was going to die for that. But, kindly, Sai did. She didn't flinch, though he expected her to. Her world was full of pain right now. This barely registered. "Thank you," she said sweetly, when he swung her arm back at her. She began bending her arms, to see if all the joints worked right. Her fingers, she noticed, were swollen as ever. They had been set in the village she found Neji in two weeks ago, and still had to rest.

Now, she imagined, she'd look like a walking zombie if she even survived this war. And that was a very narrow chance. She didn't do more than half-way fix her ribcage. One more hit, and she'd face internal bleeding again, and be less likely to survive. But she had to conserve her chakra. She was, after all, a medical nin. But first, she had a job to do.

"Where's Sasuke?" And then paused. "And Itachi."

This time, she stopped to get supplies. There were many, many dead Sound ninjas around. Also, Leaf nin. But she had a moral rule not to take anything that belonged to someone she liked. Unless it was explosive tags, which she was all over. Sakura Fubuki no Jutsu was a preferred attack in open warfare. It was also fun.

There were also chakra strings, which weren't generally in her possession, but could be useful. She was already thinking up a plan that would make Shikamaru nervous. And Sasuke, as much as she loved him, was nowhere near Shikamaru's intelligence.

When she started to think she might need a bag to carry all of her things, she detached a sound nin's leg pouch, and reattached it to her off-leg. Finally, having everything she deemed necessary, she pulled her headband down, and tied the symbol of Konoha ninja around her forehead. This time, she was serious.

The first thing he saw that let him know something was wrong was a scattering of explosive tags falling from the sky. Carried on the wind, they came down slowly, gently. And the message was received: death from above. There was a lot of them--over a hundred, and they kept coming. Sakura had prepared well. And what was better was that he wouldn't be able to see her, recognize her, because she was taking too much care to stay hidden. She was also wearing one of the masks a Sound nin happened to be wearing--and she knew it was Sound nin, and not ANBU, because he tried to kill her. And if she was wrong, well, he was certainly a traitor, because she was the Hokage's pupil.

And let them choke on that.

And because she knew he would either a, run away, or b, find out who was throwing them, she pulled a chakra string, and suddenly several kunais flew to connect that building and the one across the street. Those kunais cut another string, which sent another dozen kunais flying to the other side. And on, and on, it continued, all the way down to the ground. The strings had more explosive tags attached to them, every three feet.

And here, she ran toward the ledge and jumped, and a chakra string was wrapped around both wrists, so she flipped forward, and landed on the accompanying building gracefully. And she smiled down at Sasuke, who had been climbing that building, from behind the safety of her mask. She wiggled her fingers at him--a quick, insulting hello. And threw a kunai, that hit an explosive tag, and when it exploded the explosion was magnified by the tags still in the air.

Shikamaru really did have the best ideas in the world. Maybe she was in love.

And to prove that she really was evil, she removed a kunai from her pouch, one with an explosive tag attached, and dropped it right over Sasuke. Typically, he moved, because there was no force behind it besides gravity, which just wasn't fast enough. Also, he didn't want to die easily. But here, she grabbed another chakra string, and pulled, and was propelled along again to the neighboring building. And then, she held two fingers and her thumb out--the victory sign. "Sakura Fubuki no Jutsu."

That tag had just been paper. But the string it cut as it went down sent three more kunai with tags that weren't in different directions--everywhere Sasuke could have gone. Predictably, there was an explosion. Then another. And another. And several more at once.

And she almost squealed, and wished Shikamaru could see, and knew--just knew--Sasuke had misjudged her. Any second now and he would--

Be standing right beside her with murder in his eyes. Right. She knew that.

Sticking one hand in the pocket of the jacket she'd liberated from the same Sound nin who'd donated the mask, she looked at her former teammate innocently. "So what did you think?" She asked, and knew there was more excitement in her voice than there should be. "Impressive?"

"You're crazy," was his only allowment. And his eyes narrowed at her, because then he recognized her voice. Her perfume might be a dead giveaway to Shikamaru, but the smell of smoke, courtesy of the exploding tags, easily masked it. "Sakura." He stepped toward her. "I told you not to get in my way again."

"I like this mask," she said distractedly, "maybe I should be an ANBU. Do you think it suits me?"

This time, he was sarcastic. "If you survive, you can be Hokage."

"I'll settle for a proposal," she said, and reached for another chakra string, and used Sasuke's ribs to kick herself off. It pulled her back to the first building. And she didn't have to go any further because, before Sasuke could attempt to follow, there was a very loud "Ahem!"

Naruto to the rescue.

Sakura glanced over her shoulder at Kakashi and smiled. "So, it's safe to assume that Sai found you two then?"

She sat on the ledge of the building, kicking her feet while she wound up her unused chakra thread. Sai knowing where Itachi had been was a pure stroke of luck. Sai being able to find Kakashi and Naruto was also a stroke of luck. Itachi not seeing her while she planted a trap for Sasuke was luck. Sasuke now coming until the trap was finished was luck. Also, this entire block of town was empty--more luck.

She was, she thought, the patron Goddess of supremely lucky ninjas. The only thing that hadn't been delivered to her doorstep was Sasuke--but since he was here with Orochimaru trying to destroy Konoha, she didn't imagine him being on her doorstep would be a good thing.

When she finished, she began planning an escape path for herself--not because she didn't have faith in Naruto, of course, but she knew that they wouldn't be restricted to one rooftop for long. Giving them plenty of room was priority.

She winced at a particularly nasty attack from Naruto that managed to knock Sasuke to the ground. Apparently, he'd been working on his Taijutsu lately. "I'm glad that they're friends," she told Kakashi conversationally from behind her mask. "Otherwise they might really try to kill each other." She still hadn't removed her mask, despite her sensei's urging. She knew without being told that she now looked as ugly as Sai always said she was under this mask. Hopefully, it wouldn't be permanent.

And then, tying a chakra string to the end of a kunai, she threw it at the other building, and secured the other side of the string to the ledge before jumping off.

She caught the string before she fell down to far, just to slow herself down, and then dropped the last fifteen feet, landing in an easy roll. Anything, she thought, to save chakra.

And on the bright side--her pouches were far less heavy now. She could probably have everything in just one now.

The only problem Sakura had now was that she ran out of things to do. So, to make herself feel better, she picked up a few of the explosive tags she'd sent airborne, having since fallen to the ground, and began repacking her extra pouch. And tried to decide between finding a safe place, or reinforcing Tsunade.

Locating Tsunade was first priority, obviously, though for an instant Sakura felt like crying and complaining that her feet hurt, and her face was blistering, and her hands didn't want to work, and Sasuke tried to kill her. And almost succeeded, if only Orochimaru hadn't been such a bad surgeon, since obviously Sasuke's heart transplant had fallen through.

Her spare pouch filled, Sakura straightened, and meticulously adjusted her borrowed coat, replaced the hood over her hair. And stared at her hand, which was covered in blood. The wire had broken skin. Funny, she didn't think she'd fallen that far. "Keep an eye on Naruto," she told Kakashi over her shoulder, knowing he was right there. He was always right there, because, like everyone else, he assumed that Sakura was the one who always needed help. "If he dies, I won't forgive you."

"And if you die?"

"Then the Uchiha has one less person to kill." As she said it, she didn't know if she was talking about Itachi or Sasuke. But Kakashi was going to think it was Sasuke, so that was all that mattered.

Note: I absolutely despise this chapter, for various reasons. At least the Sakura vs Sasuke scene. It was funny when I wrote it, but now it just makes me groan.

You can probably guess what move is my favorite in Naruto. Sakura Fubuki no Jutsu (translation: Cherry Blossom Blizzard Technique). I know, she only used it in the movie. But it was completely awesome. And, you know, useful. And since I know a lot of Sakura haters, it kind of makes her suck less. Not that they even know I write fanfiction, of course, much less fanfiction about her. I'm already practically disowned for liking Sasuke.

Okay. So...another chapter, then? Ack, when will this thing stop already?