Note From The Author-- SO... I've been forced to recognize that Angell's name really is Jess after Flack using it like three times in the most recent episode. I've made the changes to the last chapter and I'll be calling her Jess for here on out; though I won't be taking the time to change every other story I've ever mentioned her in. Jess it is from now on : )

"I don't get you."

The caustic tone put Stella's back up immediately, and when she turned from her results she was rather amazed to see Jessica Angell standing there. "Excuse me?"

The younger woman had a thunderous look on her face as she shook her head. "I just don't get you."

"Okay Jess, I'm really lost here so I'm going to need you to expand for me."

All she said was, "Flack."

Stella's face fell immediately and she shook her head. "Let me finish up here and then we can talk in my office."

Jess felt the wind go out of her sails a bit as she made her way to Stella's office; but in the fifteen minutes that she had to wait she managed to get her mad up again just fine.

When Stella came in she sank into her chair with an exhausted sigh. "I don't know why I should be surprised that Don talked to you."

"He's my best friend, of course he told me."

"Jess, it's not as simple as you think it is."

Angell couldn't seem to get herself to sit down; she was too tightly wound for that to happen. "Don't be nice to me," she spat out. "Not after what he told me."

"Okay," Stella said, deciding to tread carefully. "You obviously came here with something to say, so why don't you say it?"

She had wanted to be calm, but nothing could keep her there. Before she knew it she had lost it. "I just, I don't get why…, no, I really don't get how. How the hell can you just walk away from him? You've got this amazing beautiful man standing right in front of you; he's right there and he loves you with everything he has and you just rejected him out of hand!"

"It's complicated Angell," Stella said tightly.

"Complicated better not even be the half of it." She slammed her hands down on the desk. "Do you have any idea what you turned him into? How it must have been killing him feeling like he was disrespecting you because it was nothing but sex? You know as well as I do that he had more respect for women that anyone on the planet, and you turned him into… God I don't even know what you turned him into." She turned away only because she wasn't sure she could control herself.

Stella was quiet for a moment before she spoke. "How long have you been in love with him?"

Jess whirled back around. "We're not talking about me."

"Except we are." Stella stood and walked around the desk. "Because the fact that you're in love with him is a lot of what brought you here today. So how long?"

She looked the other woman straight in the eye. "Not as long as you."

Both women seemed to deflate a bit at the words, and they both quietly moved to their seats. "I don't understand why you're here Jess," Stella said, rubbing at the pain that had suddenly risen in her temples.

"Because I pay attention, Stella; it's easy to tell when someone's experiencing the same feelings and emotions that you are. That's why I really can't comprehend how easily you can walk away from him."

Stella leaned forward, shaking her head. "Nobody ever said it was easy for me. What I don't get is why you came here. Why not be his shoulder to cry on and be there for the rebound?" she asked.

"Cynical?" Angell questioned.

"Logical."

Jess took a moment, trying to think of the best way to say it. She decided that being straightforward was best, and there were tears shining in her eyes when she finally spoke again. "Because he doesn't want me, Stella; I'm smart enough to know that. It doesn't matter how I feel about him, because he loves you, and unless I'm completely off you love him too."

"I wish it were that simple," she whispered.

"Maybe you should stop to consider the fact that the only reason it isn't simple is because you've made it that way."

They were staring each other in the aftermath of that statement when there was a knock on the door. Adam could see that he was interrupting something but he really needed to give his results to Stella. "I'm sorry to interrupt…"

Jess shook her head, standing as quickly as she could. "It's fine, Adam; I'm leaving." And she did so, without even a second look back at Stella.

"What have you got?" she sighed.

Adam was only with Stella for a few minutes. When he left the office he found Angell still waiting for the elevator and something about the look on her face made him stop. "You okay Jess?" he questioned.

Angell turned to look at him, showing him the tears still shining in her eyes. "Not really," but she managed a small smile. "Eventually I think I will be."

"Well if you need anything…" It was a big risk for him, huge actually, but he reached out to take her hand. "You know I'm here."

She gave his hand a little squeeze before letting go and stepping into the elevator. "Thank you Adam."

No matter what she tried, Stella found that she couldn't shut her mind down. They solved the case they had been working on. She finished all of her paperwork, but still her mind kept turning to Don. Angell's visit had left her doubting the choices she had made about their non relationship. More than anything at that point she wished for something, anything to preoccupy her time.

Her relief at the call that came in was short-lived when she arrived at the scene to find Flack running things down for Lindsay and Danny. It quickly became evident that they were going to pretend the other didn't exist to the best of their ability; and it turned out they both did a spectacular job of it. They did such a spectacular job of it that it left Danny and Lindsay both wondering what in the hell was going on.

When they were finished up at the scene, Don told everyone he would meet up with them at the lab after a few hours, and then he took off as quickly as was humanly possible. Ignoring the questioning glances, Stella simply picked up her things and headed for the car. She felt completely miserable about everything that was going on, and her conversation with Angell had been playing on a loop in her head ever since she had arrived at the scene. What made it worse was the ache that had broken out in her chest when she'd arrived at the scene and Don had turned to see her; the look in his eyes had been absolutely heartbreaking, and as much as she'd been questioning herself, that look and the pain she couldn't seem to suppress told her everything she needed to know.

As she drove back to the lab she knew she had to talk to Don. She found she could still stand by her decision to break off the intimate side of their relationship, but she knew then that pushing him out of her life entirely had been the last thing she should have done. It wasn't hard to decide to get him cornered when he came to the lab; because she had realized that she couldn't stand it if Flack wasn't in her world at all.

Don didn't make it back to the lab for a good three or four hours, but when he did make it back he went immediately for the coffee. Then it would potentially be easier to get him to actually talk to her.

She couldn't help but notice that he looked completely wrecked, and she felt that ache come back when she realized she had a large part in making him that way. "Can we not even try and be friends, Don?" she asked quietly.

"I certainly can't see a way," he told her, turning to face her.

"Don, I…"

"You don't have to say anything else Stella; you made your feelings pretty damn clear the other night."

She could have dealt with it if he were angry or upset, but the cold indifference in his voice pretty much terrified her. He started past her and her hand shot out to catch his arm before she could stop herself. "What if I was wrong?" she asked.

Flack's eyes went dark, but he was careful to be gentle when he shook off her hand. "The things that came out of your mouth, Stella, those weren't anything frivolous. All of that was heavy and hurtful, because telling someone that they were basically nothing more than a good fuck isn't something that someone normally takes lightly. It's also not anything you can take back."

He was halfway through the door when she spoke again. "I'm so sorry Don."

There were tears in her voice, and when he turned again he saw them in her eyes. He wondered at just how hardened he could become when he realized he was having a very hard time caring. "Bottom line? I didn't like who I was when I was with you, Stella. I knew it wasn't me, but I had you in my life and I figured it was worth it. But feeling like shit every second that I wasn't with you… Maybe you made the best choice for both of us."

He walked away, she feared, for good; and it took everything she had not to break down right then and there. Still, she made it through the rest of the day. When the shift ended it was a fight to keep the tears stinging at her eyes at bay. The radio went off as everything it played only made it worse.

Stella made it past the door man and upstairs without issue; she managed to survive a conversation with her elderly neighbor without falling to pieces, as well. But the minute she shut and locked the door behind her, she lost control. Tears she could no longer hold back couldn't be stopped, and she let her things drop to the floor. Weakness flooded over her, and all she could do was slide to the floor as her body was wracked with sobs.

Note From The Author—Okay, so I kind of, sort of, maybe lied the teeniest bit. All isn't really explained this chapter, but I do think you start to get more of a feel for what's going on. You still don't have the full insight into Stella's head, and there's definitely more angst on the way, but I can tell you that I'm really fascinated with the way my brain's taking me. I read something by one of my absolute favorite authors recently, and she firmly believes in letting the story go where your mind takes you. I'm giving her method a try, and I've got to say it's really interesting not to hold back or edit the ideas that pop into my head. I'm really trying to just go where my heart takes me with this one, wherever it may be, so we'll see how it goes. I'm excited, and I genuinely hope that you're excited too. : )