I love writing this story. As dark as it may be. But there WILL be a happy ending. Thank you so much for the reviews! I appreciate it!
Chapter 5
"So what was that about?" Ryan's at my door.
Seth had some dinner to go to with his grandpa. I hate particularly can't stand the man. Although he does constantly tell Seth not to let go of me. Seth never says anything back though so we all know that he'll let me go as soon as he gets the real girl he wants. I'm just something to take his mind off of waiting.
Ryan's no longer in his school attire. In class he wears button up shirts. Now he's wearing a plain t-shirt. Blue. Almost matches his eyes. I ask him to come in before I explain.
"Apparently I look at you differently than I do my other teachers. I don't know. He's just being Seth and I have to go along with it. So it's probably best if we don't talk at school." That's the last thing I want. "Why are you with him?" He's asking.
"Why's it matter?" I ask curiously sitting down on the couch. He sits close to me. It freaks me out a little but then it gets more comfortable.
"It doesn't, it's just clearly he's an ass." He shrugs. He has no idea what he's talking about. Okay he does. Seth is an ass but he has no right to come into my house and start barging into my life.
"He might be but he's still my boyfriend and I….love him." I choke out. The part where I said I loved Seth was possibly the most difficult thing I've ever had to say or at least today.
"No you don't." He shakes his head. What does he know? He barely even knows me! Now I'm pissed and I'm standing up.
"Get out." I put my hand to my forehead. He's not listening. Instead he's pulling me back down on the couch next to him. I'm not protesting.
"I'm sorry. It's just as much as you try to deny it and say you're clumsy I know that those bruises are from him." He has no right. I shake my head.
"Please leave. I don't feel like talking to you right now." Now I'm standing up and walking towards the front door. I open it and he walks towards me.
"You know I'm right." He says before walking out. I slam the door quickly before running upstairs and hiding in my covers.
When I thought Wednesday sucked I didn't think about how bad Thursday could possibly be. And it tops Wednesday by a long shot.
Seth meets me at my house that morning and sees I'm not dressed. I tell him I'm staying home. He gets mad and starts kicking me. I give in and get dressed. Despite the fact that now I'm in more pain than I would have liked. Even my clothes feel too tight around me.
Now I'm sitting in Ryan's class five minutes late. He acts like I'm in trouble but I know by the look on his face that he's glad I did something so he'd make me talk to him after class. I'll just tell Seth I got in trouble for being late. That's not totally untrue.
"You look dead." Ryan laughed at me. Great. "Just not feeling good…didn't sleep well. I need to get going." I pick up my books and rush out of there.
Seth's got a look on his face that I thought I wouldn't see for at least a few more hours. "I'm so sorry." I whisper. He just walks past me and I really have no idea why he's pissed.
I haven't done a thing wrong. NOTHING.
I'm not feeling well so I leave school early. I thought going home would make everything better. But it just got worse. My mom happened to have returned from her vacation today. She's standing in the kitchen with her hands on her hips and her lips pursed together.
"You look like you've been run over by a truck, Taylor. Stand up straight." She instructs. I don't listen. Instead I'm opening the fridge door and pulling out a bottle of water.
"I'm thinking we should start you on another diet, what do you say?" She's smiling. My mom gets kicks out of my suffering.
"I say I'm okay with how I look. I've had a rough day I'm going to bed." I try but no she's not letting me go that easily.
"If you keep at this Seth Cohen is just going to leave you, Taylor. Then who will you be? Hmmm? You'll be no one! Sure he's a little geeky but he's from money and you'll never have to worry if you're with him. So start caring more about your appearance." She scoffs. I'm leaning against the counter waiting for her to finish.
"If I'm not up to Seth's standards then he can leave me. I'm not making him stay around." I tell her with my arms crossing over my chest.
"If Seth leaves you'll be alone. No other man would ever want you." She laughs.
"We'll see about that." I say under my breath stalking out of the room. I hate my mother. And as far as I can tell she hates me too.
My phone's buzzing. I glance over at my clock and apparently I've only been sleeping an hour. Ryan. "Uhm, hello?" I answer uncertainly.
"Hey. You okay?" He asks. Does he not remember the fact that I am his student? That it's probably against some huge rule to not be any even a friendly relationship with me. Not that I mind. If I had my way it'd probably be way more than that. But that's not the point. The point is people could speculate. Then he'd get in trouble. Possibly go to jail. Well, not jail. He's hasn't done anything to get him into jail. Not yet anyway. How come I can't seem to get dirty thoughts about my freaking history teacher out of my head? I can answer that but I don't want to. I just want to close my eyes and forget everything. But I can't. He called me. So now I'm stuck on the phone with him. Thoughts of him being next to me in bed, naked, flood through my head. I can't even speak due to the fact I'm so shocked with myself. I've never been like this before.
"Where's your wife?" I ask. Not really caring. And I probably said it a tad too sharply. "What's that matter? I called to see if you were okay…" He sounded a tad bit hurt. I cared. But I couldn't let on that I cared. No, somehow I had to make myself stop liking my teacher. It was only making things more difficult than they already were.
"I don't know, Ryan." I sigh and lean my head against my wall closing my eyes. "I'm sorry, Taylor." He sounds sorry but for what I have no idea. "I should go." I take a deep breath fighting back the urge to ask him to come over.
"Can I see you?" He asks quickly. She was about to say no until her mother had quickly walked into her room and said she'd be gone for the next couple of days.
"Sure, my mom just left. Park down the street. Which is probably what you should do from now on." I say like he'll be coming around a lot more. One can only hope. But I know I shouldn't hope. I know I'm getting way ahead of myself. Setting myself up from more hurt than I can take. But I'm Taylor Townsend and I can take whatever life decides to throw at me.
"Why exactly do I have to park down the street?" Ryan asked as I let him in the house. "For safety purposes. Don't want someone to think we're doing anything wrong, right?" I gave him a smile. He laughed and walked with me to the couch.
"Want something to drink?" I asked him before sitting down. He shakes his head so I settle in down next to him. He looks nervous.
"So, what's going on?" I ask him. He takes a deep breath and runs his hand through his hair. "Everything." He laughs.
"What do you mean?" I ask curiously.
"I don't know actually. I'm just stressed." He smiles his amazing smile at me. I smile back and inch a little closer to him. Great. Just great. Now he's so close that it's even harder than usual to refrain from kissing him. But so far so good. At least I'm not straddling his lap again. I'm pretty sure that was a bad idea on my part.
"About Marissa and the baby?" I ask him. "Yeah a little." He says harshly. I think I just hit a sore spot. "Bad subject?" I ask.
He's looking away from me so I grab his face and turn it towards me. Oh God. Bad idea. Because now I'm staring deep into his eyes. We're inching closer. Closer. Almost there.
His phone rings. I can't decide if I'm pissed off or happy that it rang and broke us apart.
"I don't care, Marissa. Just get out." He put his hand on his hand over his face and is breathing deeply. I want to comfort him. I don't know how though.
"I told you, I'm not staying with you, you cheated on me! I won't abandon him but I can't stay with you." So, that's why he's here.
I take my hand and without really thinking I rest it on his thigh. He jerks his head up and I can hear her yelling at him over the phone. But he's not listening. No. He's staring into my eyes again. I start rubbing the inside of his thigh. He's still looking at me.
"We'll talk later." He tells the yelling woman before shutting the phone, all the while still watching me. "What are you doing?" He croaks out. I watch him gulp as I lean in and almost touch his lips. Except I'm just letting them linger there. I can tell he's getting frustrated.
"You're my teacher." I whisper against his lips looking into his eyes.
"So?" He pulls my body closer to his. Our lips still haven't met.
"You could get in trouble for this. Get fired…" He cuts me off with his lips attacking mine. Oh God. I'm in Heaven. I'm kissing my hot history teacher! In my freaking living room of all places! This kiss is possibly ten times better than my many kisses with my boyfriend. Oh no. My boyfriend. I have a boyfriend. I need to pull away. NOW. I can't. No. I just want to keep at this because I can feel his hands pulling me onto his lap now and I straddle his legs. His hands are on my hips sending vibrations through my entire body.
My phone's ringing. I'm trying to take my mind off of answering it and just keep it on the fact that Ryan now has his hands on my back reaching to unhook my bra. I try to break away.
"Leave it." He says. "It could be Seth." I try and it helps. His eyes turn from lustful to hateful in a matter of seconds. It frightens me a little. I start cursing myself mentally for stopping that amazing and hot make-out session.
"I'm sorry." I tell him not getting off of his lap right away to answer my phone. I could really care less now. "Don't be. That shouldn't have happened…" He pushes me off of his lap.
"But it did! So tomorrow at school we're just going to act like we did not just make-out on my couch!?" I stand up in front of him. He lets out a strange laugh.
"What?" I demand with my hands on my hips. He's shaking his head and the phone has finally stopped ringing.
"You missed your boyfriends call." He says harshly. "I don't care about him!" I stomp my foot like a 5-year old.
"Sure about that? I mean just yesterday you said you loved him." He sounds made at ME! "I don't love him. I hate him with everything in me. Happy I finally told you!?" I yell flailing my arms now. I probably look like an idiot but I don't care. "Then why are you with him?" He demands standing up now. I step back so we aren't so close.
"Because!" Is all I say. There's no real answer to why I'm with him. Ryan shakes his head at me and takes his hands on places them on my hips.
"Stop." I look down not pulling away. He takes a hand and pulls my chin up to look at him. So now I'm staring at his eyes. Those beautiful blue eyes
. "Why are you with him?" He asks again. This time I say "No one else will want me." I can't believe I just admitted that. I barely ever admitted to myself. So why was I admitting it to my fuckinghistory teacher!
"I do." Did I just hear him correctly? Did my teacher just tell me he wanted me? I'm sure my face looks confused because he let's out a small laugh.
"I know I'm your teacher but…something's there and you can't tell me you don't feel it too." He says. I can feel it. I felt it the second I laid my eyes on him in class. Barely two weeks ago! I don't say anything. Instead I'm taking my hands and wrapping them around his neck.
"If you don't tell. I won't tell." I can't believe I just said that. No. No. No. I shouldn't be doing this! But how can I not looking into his blue eyes? He licks his lips and now we're about to kiss again. The doorbell's ringing. I'm thanking God that our door doesn't have a window of some kind.
"Upstairs, first door on the right is my room." I tell him quickly trying not to panic. He smirks at me before moving towards the stairs.
I wait until I can't see him anymore before opening the front door. I'm currently praising myself for telling Ryan to park down the street because standing in front of me is a certain curly haired boy that would totally be drop kicking me right now if he saw it.
"Where were you? Why have you been ignoring my calls?" He's pissed off. I should really stop doing whatever I did to piss him off.
"My phone was down here and I was upstairs. I didn't hear it." I tell him. My phone is down here but I wasn't upstairs and I did hear it.
He doesn't take that answer. Nope or else my head wouldn't be hitting the white wall in my foyer if he did. I hate when he pushes me. I hate when he touches me. I just hate him. He's hitting me in my stomach. Then my face. The next thing I know I'm crouching down on the floor clutching my stomach. I hope he's not expecting me to have sex with him now. Even if Ryan weren't upstairs there is no way my body could handle it.
"I'll see you in the morning." Is all he says before walking out of my house and slamming the door shut behind him. I don't start screaming until after he's gone. I hadn't noticed it before but I'm bleeding. The blood's all over my pants and the floor. He didn't cut me. No the blood's coming from a different place.
"RYAN!" I'm screaming. I hope he can hear me. Now there's pain. Horrible pain. It feels like hours until he's by my side.
"What in the hell?" He's trying to help me up.
"Call 911." Is all I say. Something's wrong. Something's very very wrong.