Loss Part 5

See disclaimer in Part I

*****

Sam woke from a fitful sleep with a gasp. The doctor on duty, Dr. Porter, had insisted both she and Jessica try to get some sleep until they knew of any new developments. Jessica had tossed and turned for a while, until completely exhausted, she had fallen sound asleep. Every time Sam dozed off, her mind was filled with disjointed images of she and Jack. Fighting on missions, making love, arguing. Jack standing in the rain outside her house, begging "Please, Sam." What was most disturbing was she kept replaying what he'd said on Antarctica when she'd asked what happened when his parachute had malfunctioned. Jack's words "I hit the ground, I hit the ground, I hit the ground," kept repeating in her head until she called out "No!" and woke up.

"Sam?" It was Daniel. He pushed the tent flap open to look in at her. "You okay?"

She nodded, but she wasn't. Daniel came and sat next to her. He rubbed a hand up and down her back. "Sorry, but I don't think you are."

Sam's eyes filled with tears. "He thinks I hate him. What if I never see him again? I just lost Dad. I can't…I just can't…" She turned her head into Daniels' shoulder and sobbed silently. Daniel put both arms around her and let her cry. "Hey," He said softly. "Jack's made it out of tighter situations than this, and he knows you love him."

Sam sat up and wiped a hand across her eyes. "Does he? I was really hard on him, Daniel, and now that's how things were left. With him thinking I don't love him anymore."

"Sam, let's wait and see how things turn out, okay? You've been a real rock through the whole thing, taking care of Davis's wife and trying to cope with all this. It's natural it would wear you down after a while. Teal'c and I are here for you, you know."

"I know, and I love you both for it." Daniel smiled into her hair.

He nodded toward Jessica. "How's she doing?"

Sam sniffled and pushed her hair off her brow. "About like you'd think. I'm just glad she can get some sleep. Forget for a while, you know?"

Daniel removed his arm from around her and stood. "And I think that's what you should do, too. When was the last time you slept at all?"

"I've been trying to."

"No, I mean before that."

"I, I'm not sure."

"Just what I thought. Try and lie down for a while at least. I'll let you know if anything happens, okay?"

Sam squeezed Daniel's hand before releasing it and doing as he said. As she lay down, he covered her with the blanket and waggled his fingers at her. "Night, night."

"Thanks, Daniel." He smiled gently and left her to sleep. She actually managed to doze dreamlessly for a while until something awoke her. Jessica was sitting on the side of her cot, sniffling.

"Hey," Sam called softly. "What's wrong?"

"Oh," Jessica wiped her nose with a tissue. "Just feeling sorry for myself. Don't mind me."

Sam sat up and moved to sit next to Jessica. "Hey, join the club. Listen, are you hungry? I could go get us something."

"Not really. I could use something to drink, though."

Sam patted her arm. "Coming right up. Let me put my shoes and coat on and I'll go raid the mess tent, okay?"

Sam was tying her shoes when she heard her name called. Daniel pushed the tent flap back, looking somber. "Sam, Jessica, I…I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this. We just got word. They found the tail section of the plane. Two bodies were in it. They're bringing them down the mountain right now."

Both women shot to their feet, gasping. "Who is it ?" Sam demanded. "Did they say?"

Daniel shook his head. "No. As far as we know they haven't been identified yet."

As he spoke the air was pounded with the beat of the approaching helicopter.

***********

"Well, I've never been to Spaaain, but I've been to Oklahoma…" Jack slurred the words as he sung. He stopped. "No, that's not right. It's 'Well I never been to SpainBut I kinda like the music, Say the ladies are insane there, And they sure know how to use it, They don't abuse it, Never gonna lose it, I can't refuse it.'" He chuckled to himself, pleased that he could remember, and continued.

"Well I never been to England, But I kinda like the Beatles, Well, I headed for Las Vegas, Only made it out to Needles, Can you feel it, It must be real it, Feels so good, Oh, feels so good." He took a swig from the almost empty bottle and saluted with it. Now for the best part, he thought.

"Well I never been to heaven, But I been to Oklahoma, Well they tell me I was born thereBut I really don't remember, In Oklahoma, not Arizona, What does it matter, What does it matter." He threw the bottle away from him and muttered, "What does it matter." sourly.

Davis had disappeared again, presumably off to find more hidden treasures, although what could be left in the wreckage was beyond him. He could tell his condition was worsening. The mere act of breathing was painful, and he was weakening. The cold seemed to be seeping into his bones to the point beyond shivering. "Here lies General Jack O'Neill, Popsicle," He muttered.

He dozed for a while, helped along by the alcohol, until he heard a commotion at the entrance and knew Davis had returned. Once again, he had a blanket containing some new stuff. "Whatcha got now, Davis?"

Davis whipped off the blanket to reveal several seat cushions from the plane. "Voila! I figure we can make a bed for you and get you up off the ground."

"Hey, great. I thought my butt was permanently frozen down here. That's really great."

Davis helped him sit up and arranged the cushions so Jack could lie on them more comfortably. "There. Better?"

"Much. Thanks. Listen, Davis, I just want to say, you've really been a blessing during this mess. I couldn't have done it without you."

"Hey, buy me lunch in the commissary at the SGC when we get back and we'll call it even, okay?"

"You may have to have that lunch on your own."

Davis held up a finger. "Now, no talk like that. It's not over till it's over."

Jack looked at Davis seriously. "We may be rapidly approaching 'over'."

Davis frowned. "That bad?"

"It's not good. I haven't told you this before, but I've been coughing up blood. Quite a bit of it."

"Why didn't you tell me? You shouldn't have had all that liquor!"

Jack shrugged. "At this point, what does it matter?"

"General, there's something else you need to know."

"What's that?"

"When I went back to the plane, the pilot and co-pilot were gone. I think we missed the rescue crews. The good news is, the snow has stopped for the moment and the wind has died down."

Jack nodded. "That makes my next decision a lot easier. They'll be back. I want you to go back to the wreckage and catch them the next time they come looking. Get yourself out."

"Yes sir. I'll bring back help."

"No. I don't want you or the crews to risk it. Just go."

Davis shook his head decisively. "Not without you, sir. I won't do it."

"Davis, listen to me. We both know the risks, and the thing is, even if you bring back help, I won't make it."

"Sir…"

"I've been to this party before, Davis. I know what's happening to me. Just let an old General die in peace, okay? Go home and help your wife have that baby."

Davis gave him a hard look. "Let me try one more thing." Without waiting for Jack's consent, he crawled out the cave entrance and was gone. After a few minutes Jack thought he heard Davis call out "Yes!"

****

The chopper landed. The pilot killed the engines, and Reynolds and his men approached the craft just like before. This time when Hammond called them to attention, Sam started to run toward the chopper. A pair of strong arms stopped her. Teal'c. "Colonel Carter," his voice sounded unbearably sad. "Let Daniel Jackson determine the identities of the recovered bodies before you approach them."

Sam struggled. "Let me go, Teal'c."

"Sam," Daniel's voice was low. "He's right. Let me go see who it is first, okay?" He held her eyes for a moment before he joined Reynolds at the chopper's door. He spoke with him for a moment, nodded and dropped his head for a moment, either from grief or relief remained to be seen. He said something to Reynolds and put a hand on his arm before he walked slowly back to the others.

"It's General Vidrine and his aide Major Parsons. It looks like they died in the initial crash."

The relief was so great Sam slumped in Teal'c's arms, causing him to hold her up instead of restrain her. "Oh, God." She pushed herself upright and Teal'c released her. "It's not them. It's not them." She faced Jessica Davis, who stood still as a statue. One hand over her mouth, the other on her stomach. Sam put her hands on Jessica's arms. "Jess, It's not them."

Jessica removed the hand over her mouth. Her face was pale and a tear ran down her cheek. "If it's not them, then where are they?"

***********