Chapter 13
Monday. I think my favorite part of coming to school is seeing Ryan. Actually I know it's my favorite part. The work sure isn't. It used to be. Coming to school was fun back then now it's just not. I'm currently in the closest. Oh God. He needs to hurry up. Only 10 more minutes until class starts.
"What took you so long?" I demand when the door opens and he's in the room. "Marissa had the baby last night." He turns the closest light on. I notice he's out of breath and he looks pale.
"Oh?" I back up a little. He's going to tell me we can only be friends now. He's going to tell me how he wants to be the woman who is his son's mother. He's going to say 'it's not you it's me' or something cliché like that. I won't be able to handle it. Oh God.
"Kingsly is healthy and looks just like me. I'm freaked out, Taylor. I don't love this woman and I've got a kid with her. She asked me today to stay with her and him but I really can't. I can't, Taylor." He looks confused and hurt. He wants me to tell him not to. I'm not going to tell him what he should do. He needs to make that decision on his own.
"If you go back to her this…" I motioned between us. "Is over. I don't want to ruin your marriage or confuse your son." I can't believe I'm saying this. Oh God. It hurts. My heart.
"No. I'm not going back to her. I refuse. She signed, Taylor. This morning. Mr. Cohen is getting it all situated." He tells me. I jump up and wrap my arms around his neck. "I have to know…I don't want to sound conceited or anything but…" I don't meet his eyes but I know he's smiling. "I wouldn't divorce her if it weren't for you." He tells me in my ear. He's kissing that part underneath my ear and I seriously could take him right there.
"You have to stop marking me." I giggle. "Hmm. Why?" He asks not taking his lips off of my neck. "Because people are going to get suspicious and neither of us want that. Ry, we have to keep this a secret until I graduate." I tell him with my eyes closed. I can barely stand up straight with him attacking my neck like that.
"I know…I just want to be with you. All of the time. I'm getting an apartment not far from your house." He tells me finally taking his lips off of my neck and looking at me.
"Oh really? Does this mean I get to visit?" I asked smirking. "Any time you want." He tells me and then he's attacking my lips. I feel amazing. I'm freaked out though. Things are going too well for me. Something's going to happen, I can just tell. Something bad.
"I didn't take you for a slut, Taylor." Seth Cohen. I haven't seen him since we broke up. I take a deep breath and give him a fake smile.
"I'm not. You're the one who moved on so quickly." I said folding my arms across my chest. "Oh am I? I don't think I'm the one sporting hickey's on my neck." He gave me a smirk.
I noticed Summer come up and he wrapped his arm around her. She looked happy. No bruises, nothing. So what was it about me that he felt like he needed to hit? "Taylor, I just really want to apologize for everything." Summer was smiling at me. A real smile. No one besides Ryan had ever really given me a real smile. I then got to thinking how nice it would be to have a friend. A real one. A best friend.
"Thanks, Summer. I really appreciate that." I nod giving her a smile. "Seth's got this thing to do with his dad tonight and I could really use a girls night so maybe you'd want to come and hang with me?" I was shocked. Completely and totally shocked. I didn't know what to say to her. Seth was looking at her a little confused.
"Sure, sounds good." I nod smiling. I give her my number and I head towards my second class of the day.
I don't know how I ended up sitting on the floor watching TV in Summer Roberts room. I thought it would be awkward. It was at first. Then she broke out the junk food. Even though I could just hear my mother screaming in my head not to eat any of it, I had to. My Nazi mother refused to buy anything with any carbs. in it.
"So I've never really hung out with anyone before like this. I don't know what we're supposed to talk about." I tell her taking a bite of the ice cream that's in my hands.
"Anything. I know this seems weird that I want to be friends all of a sudden but my friends all want to drink and party and I'm really growing out of that. I thought you could use a friend…" She looked over at me crossing her legs. I smiled. My phone started ringing next to me. I looked at her and then at the Caller ID. Ryan.
"It's Mr. Hottie isn't it? Oh My God Taylor you totally have to tell me about him after you're done with that call." She laughs pointing at my phone. I nod and glance at the bathroom. "Go ahead." She tells me. "Hey." I smile answering the call.
"Hey babe. I was wondering if you could stop by after awhile?" He asked me. I couldn't help but laugh. It was cute. I don't know why exactly but it just was. Hell, everything about Ryan Atwood was cute to me. "I'm at Summer's right now but I might be able to before I head home. What's going on?" I ask wondering why he wants me to stop by so badly.
"Nothing. Marissa's still in the hospital and I'm home alone. I'll text you directions." He says. Oh God. I freeze. I don't know what to say or do. I don't know if I'll be able to go over there with out doing something other than make out with him.
"I don't know if that's such a good idea, I mean…I don't know…if…" I don't know what to say exactly. I can hear a deep breath coming from the other end of the line.
"We don't have to do anything, Taylor. I promise. Just after you leave Summer's think about coming to see me? I barely got to hold you today…" He trailed off. I was smiling. I knew what he meant. We barely had any time in the closet this morning and then I rushed over to Summer's right after school.
"Fine. Nothing can happen though, I'm not ready. Not yet." I tell him before hanging up. I walk out of the bathroom to see Summer watching the flat screen TV.
"So, spill." Summer told me as soon as I sat back down next to her. "What is there to spill?" I ask picking my ice cream back up.
"The fact that you're totally with THE hottest teacher in Harbor history!" Summer laughed pushing me a little. I was confused at how comfortable this was. "You really can't tell anyone, Summer. I can't risk him getting caught or fired…" I look at her.
"This stay's between us, promise." She smiled at me.
"Okay. He's perfect. I mean besides he's got a wife who just last night delivered his son." I spoke quickly knowing I would get some sort of response from the brunette.
"Oh my God, are you serious?" She asked her mouth open wide. "They are getting a divorce though." I clarify.
"Still! You're totally hooking up with a married man! Wow, Taylor totally didn't see you for that kind of sneaky!" Summer giggled. I laughed along with her. This was fun. I had never in my life experienced this and I didn't want to let it go.
"When you make it sound like that I feel like a slut." I laughed jokingly. "Well have you two…you know?" She quirked up her eyebrows. I shake my head quickly.
"Oh no! Of course not. That's not going to happen for a long time." I told her after setting the ice cream carton down on the floor. "Have you and Seth?" I asked seriously. "No." She shook her head quickly. She's going to wish she never did once they do. He's terrible at sex but I'm sure I've mentioned that before.
"Look, Summer I really should tell you this…he used to hit me. I don't know if he has raised a hand to you but…Summer he hurt me." I knew this was probably not the best thing to tell her but I just had to. Poor girl was going into this relationship with Seth Cohen blind as a bat.
"He told me. He said he wouldn't hit me the way he hit you." Summer lowered a voice a bit. I was surprised. Seth actually told her? I can't…why me? I want to scream and ask her why me? Ask someone why only I got hit and pressured into sex like I was. No, this isn't fair.
"I have to go." I quickly stand up from my spot on the floor. Summer looks up at me confused. "What? What's wrong?" She asks me standing up beside me. "I just have to go…" I grabbed my bag off of her bed and quickly walked out of her house.
I was shaking by the time I made it to my car. This was totally bothering me. "Ryan, I can't drive." I called him on the phone quickly. My whole body was shaking too much to keep my hands on the wheel. "Taylor, what's going on?" He asked me. He sounded worried. "I need you to come get me. I'm at Summer's. Please, Ryan." I begged.
"How do I get there?" He quickly asked. He was on his way. I couldn't move.
"He told her he'd never hurt her like he did me, Ryan! Why me? Why did he have to hit me? I can't even get close to you because of him!" I screamed once Ryan's face was in front of mine. I had to stop this. I had to stop making him save me. I'm a big girl I can do this on my own. But I want him here. I want to just know someone's around that cares about me.
"Shh, come on Taylor." He grabbed both sides of my arms and helped me up. I needed to stop this. NOW.
"I'm sorry, Ryan. I shouldn't have called you. I'm depending way too much on you. You've got this whole other life that doesn't involve me. You should be with your wife and son in the hospital." I told him leaning my back against my car. I wasn't able to hold myself up.
"Get in your car and follow me to my house. Call your mom lie, I don't care what you tell her you're staying with me tonight. Okay?" He grabbed both sides of my face making me look directly at him. I nod and he kisses the tip of my nose. I realize my mom won't even be home tonight. She's on some sort of work trip. I don't really remember. "She's not home." I tell him.
"At all?" He asked. I shook my head no. "I'll see you in a minute." He says opening my car door for me and watches me get in.
"I remember seeing this place when I was at Seth's." I look around Ryan's large home. It's not much bigger than mine. Which is strange since my mom and I are the only people who live there. Ryan smiled back at me as he took his shoes off in the foyer. He walked over and helped me take my jacket off. He kissed away the remnants of my tears on my cheeks.
"I don't ever want to see you crying again." He tells me putting his hands on the back of my head. "I won't as long as I have you." I tell him smiling.
"Good. Now come on, I want you to tell me pick out my new place." He tells me guiding me to an office just past the living room. "You're looking on the internet?" I question as he sits down and pulls me onto his lap. He pulls the laptop close enough for both of us to look at. "Yes I am. How about this one?" He points to a small town house.
"It's cute." I shrug. It's two bedroom one bath. Perfect for a bachelor. I guess that's what Ryan will be once he divorces Marissa.
"Oh that one!" I point to a small two story home that is painted a light blue. "It's got three bedrooms. I don't really need three." He tells me.
"Make one an office or something. Then the other will be Kingsly's room when he visits. It's so cute, Ry." I lean my body back to rest against him.
"So I have to get it because it's cute?" He laughs at me. "Of course, silly. Then once I'm 18 and graduated I can move in." Oh God. I did not say that out loud. That was supposed to be only for my mind. Not for Ryan to hear. He tenses up underneath me.
"No, I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. I…" I'm embarrassed. "It's okay. If we last through all of this, Taylor of course I want you to move in." When he tells me that I get shivers through my body. "How did I ever get so lucky?" I ask turning around to face him and straddle his legs.
"If I get this much response out of you from just looking at the house, that's the one I want." He joked. So his jokes suck, but he's cute when he tries. "Mmhmm." I laugh grinding my hips into him. "Don't do that." He tells me placing his hands on my hips.
"And why not?" I ask knowing exactly what his answer is. "Because it's hot." He growls a little. I can't believe I'm actually causing this kind of response out a guy. This wasn't anything like It was with Seth. Not even close.
"Mr. Atwood did you just call me hot? That is no way to talk to your student." I tell him sitting up on his lap and placing my hands on top of his. He smiles and removes his hands placing them on my ass and pulling me into him. I giggle and kiss him hard on the lips.