Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original Twilight Series characters; the ones I create, I take full credit on.
Chapter One:
I had just woken up when I heard it.
Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! I thought. Not a-fucking-gain. Eww. Wrong choice of words.
The thing I was disgusted at: hearing my mom and dad having major sex. Disgusting; I mean, I would live at the big Cullen house, but, I bet it's just a worse with Rosalie and Emmett, and Alice and Jasper…and how very much I hate to think of it…Carlisle and Esme. Ugh!
Weird thing was…I wouldn't have minded if it was me and Jacob getting it–.
"Good morning, sweetheart!" my mom shouted.
"Oh shit!" I whispered, hoping my dad didn't hear my thoughts…
"What was that??" she had cracked open the door and had her head peeking in.
"Uh…nothing. I was saying 'Oh shoot!' because I forgot about Jake coming over today…" I lied. Sometimes I can lie VERY well…other times…my family says I do it just about as well as my mom was when she was "alive."
My mom rolled her eyes. "Well, you better hurry then."
"Why?"
"He's going to be here in about…" she looked over my head at the clock on my nightstand.
I turned around.
Bad choice. I screamed.
I had absolutely five minutes before he got here.
"MOTHER! WHY DIDN'T YOU WAKE ME????" I started running around the room panicking.
I swear I heard her chuckle as she closed the door and left.
I quickly stripped of everything I had on and ran to my dresser and grabbed a red-polka-dotted bikini top and red bottom; ran to my closet to find a cover-up dress – successfully done in a nice mossy green color.
Then I ran to the bathroom. That's when I screamed inwardly.
I had a lot of work to do before him came over…in two minutes.
So I brushed my hair – what a tangled mess! I took at least a minute to get that situated. I started on my water-proof make-up next.
My dad popped in to see what progress I was making. He grimaced for a second, and I didn't know why. But he kept his eyes on my face the whole time after it. "Why so serious?" he quoted from Batman. (a/n: I do not own this quote.)
"DAD!"
"All right, all right! But seriously," I gave him an evil look, "sorry! But, why are you getting so dressed up, when every time before, you never did?"
"Dad, I trying to be nice here." I said softly, "but…PERSONAL SPACE!!!!!"
My dad shook his head and while leaving my personal space muttered, "All I wanted were some answers, and what do I get? Yelled at. That's what I get."
I finished applying my water-proof mascara, and water-proof lip-gloss/stick and started to run to my bedroom to get my change of clothes when…
"Holy motherfu…RENESMEE?" I heard him say as I was about to get in my bedroom. I turned around slowly.
"Nice to see you, too, Jake."
I looked down at his "man" area and I swear I saw him having a boner. I looked down, and realized why – I was completely naked.
A/N: Oh my Edward Cullen. Haha. I'm sorry. I couldn't resist the urge! I had to pull it off! …oh. Haha. REALLY wrong choice of words. But still, I hope you enjoyed, and please review! Much more fun is to come. :D forever yours, xXxMOTAxXx