Orochimaru blinked at his reflection in the mirror, his eyes half way open and what remained of his hair, disheveled.
Orochimaru took on a confused look when he noticed his hair, or lack there of. His left eye twitched and he let out a howl that rung through the entire base.
Juugo turned his head away from his breakfast in enough time to see Orochimaru flying down the hall, heading for the kitchen area. His eyes widened and his mouth went slack, making the chopsticks in his mouth fall to the floor with a clatter.
When Orochimaru had made his rampage known to the others, they also looked up.
"What the hell have you done?!" Orochimaru yelled at the group of sound nin. They blinked innocently back at him, none saying a word.
"Well?" He demanded.
"Well now at lest you don't look like a fruit." Kin said nonchalantly, scooping up some rice and stuffing it in her mouth.
That only seemed to infuriate Orochimaru even more.
"WHAT!!" He screamed. You could practically see the steam coming out of his ears.
"You heard me." Kin said, taking a gulp of water.
Orochimaru stared at her for a minute. None of his followers ever acted that way towards him and he didn't exactly know how to deal with it at the moment.
He turned around and started walking away. When he got to the entry way he stopped and turned around.
"Oh, you'll get yours soon enough." He said and then continued on his way out the door.
Kin let out a sigh as she continued to eat her breakfast.
Snorts and soft giggles where heard before full blown laughter set in.
"Oh man! Suigetsu you are a God! I bow down to you!" Kidomaru said while eating the kitchen floor.
"I know." Suigetsu said. He downed his water bottle and then got back up to get another one from the fridge.
"All right, this 'prank' is going to take some time." Suigetsu said turning to his now loyal band of mindless (or so he thought) followers. "So I want Sakon, Ukon, and Kimimaro to get the materials on this list, and I want the rest of you are going to help decorate the dungeon to meet this criteria." He motioned to number 3 on the list.
"Oh, and Tayuya, I want you to rest because I want you to be able to keep the Genjutsu up for about two hours. Understood?" Suigetsu asked everyone.
There was a mixed mummer of 'yes', 'yeah', 'okay', and 'whatever you say boss'.
-0-
A couple hours later and they had the deed of 'decorating' accomplished. Now all they needed was Orochimaru to pull it all together. They sent Kabuto to go fetch him.
When Kabuto brought Orochimaru down to the dungeon, everyone in the vicinity saw that Orochimaru had taken to wearing a black ski cape on his head to keep his horrible hair out of sight.
"What do you want? I was in the middle of something important." Orochimaru said looking aggravated. He crossed his arms and looked to the dull, grey wall on his left.
"Oh, we just want to show you something…" Zaku said pointing off to the side were a closed off dungeon cell was. The door was closed and Orochimaru didn't know what was wrong with it, it looked ordinary enough to him.
3. Stick him in a room with pink padded wall, no doors or windows, and Tsunade. (See how long it takes him to get out)
Before he could even take the first step he was hit over the head with something big, hard, and heavy. He suspected it was an encyclopedia. Before he even hit the ground he felt something warp tight around him.
4. While being stuck in a straight jacket.
After a few moments wrestling him into the straight jacket he was chucked into the dungeon cell. It was about 5 minutes before he stopped seeing stars and he could get his bearings straight.
When he was finally able to sit up he saw…pink. And more pink and even more pink. He let out a little whimper. Well it may be pink, but at lest it was soft. He looked around some more. Something wasn't right.
'Hey, where did the door go?' He thought.
He focused his eyes into the far corner of the room. It wasn't all pink there. In fact he saw green, blondish-yellow, red, and black. The colors started moving a bit and they started to form the body of a woman.
"$#&!" Orochimaru screamed when he figured out who the women was.
Outside the door all the sound Nin could hear Orochimaru's terrified screams of 'Tsunade, what the hell are you doing here?' and 'No! Tsunade, don't!' and 'Put your clothes back on!'
Dosu was standing near the door with a stop watch in his hand. Tayuya was standing in the corner playing her flute, casting the illusion on the poor, unfortunate soul known as Orochimaru.
A few more minutes flew by with Orochimaru's horrid screaming to accompany them, and then everything went silent. Orochimaru bust through the wall beside Ukon and Sakon. He looked paler then usual. (Astonishing, isn't it?)
They both jumped back out of the way, only getting hit by the falling dust left after Orochimaru's mad dash out of the room.
Orochimaru raced up the winding stair case and out of sight.
As soon as Orochimaru was out of sight and ear shot everyone fell to the ground laughing. (Okay almost everyone, Kimimaro only smirked.)
"Hey Dosu, how long did it take for him to get out?" Suigetsu asked walking over to the boy.
"57 minutes." Said Dosu showing the stop watch to everyone.
"Really? I thought he would have gotten out sooner." Suigetsu looked lost in thought.
"All right, now we have to go to my room and get Orochimaru's cut off hair." Kidomaru then grinned at Suigetsu and they both turned their heads toward Kabuto.
"I'm really not going to enjoy this am I?" Kabuto said.
"Probably not." Suigetsu grinned.
4. Sell his hair and man whore, Kabuto, on eBay.
Under it was written severely over priced man whore and hair in Suigetsu's sloppy handwriting.
"Alright Kabuto, say cheese and look pretty for the camera." Zaku said as he hit the button and took the picture just as Kabuto was turning around.
"Ack!" Kabuto squawked, his arms flew up to guard his face from the blinding flash.
"Hey guys! I got the picture!" Zaku said waving the camera around in the air above his head.
Kabuto, who was still seeing lights, waddled over to the computer and gathered around it just like everyone else.
They loaded the pictures into the computer and put the bid up on eBay.
-0-
2 weeks later bidding was done and Kabuto and Orochimaru's hair now had a new owner. They boxed up the hair and Kabuto and sent them to their new homes. (Right let's get something straight, they didn't box up Kabuto too, they just told him to wait in the next town over for a couple of days. But they really did send the hair.)
They got the money, and a paper saying all the important stuff. And then they shipped off the hair and waited for the complaint from the girl they sent it too to say that she only got the hair and her man whore didn't come with it.
-0-
Orochimaru wondered where Kabuto had gone. It has been 3 days and Orochimaru was missing his personal 'servant.' (slave)
Orochimaru walked over to Zaku who was sitting on the couch, fiddling with a pen and staring into space.
"Zaku, have you seen Kabuto around?" Orochimaru asked.
"Sold him." Zaku said twirling the pen.
"Sold him?" He questioned.
"Yep, on eBay. Him and your hair, they got a good price too. 2 million ryou. Can you believe that?" Zaku said holding the paper out for Orochimaru to see.
Orochimaru took hold off the paper and looked at it up and down, left and right, he even tried turning it upside down to cheek for flaws. He started shaking with anger when he found out it was he real deal.
Orochimaru narrowed his eyes at Zaku and then smacked him over the head.
"Get him back!" Orochimaru said with a sneer as he walked back to his lab.
Zaku chuckled as he rubbed the bump on the back of his head.
"Alright, we better bring him back now." Zaku said to Karin when she walked into the living room.
"Damn, I was enjoying it here without him." Karin said with a huff. She turned to go tell the others that it was time to bring Kabuto back.
"I'm sure you were." Zaku said, getting up to fallow her to the others.
-0-
Kabuto was back now, though I can't say the same thing about Orochimaru's hair. They had gotten the complaint by now but ignored it.
Orochimaru was happy because his sound Nin hadn't tried anything in the last few days. He walked past Tayuya's room. The door was slightly ajar and inside sat Tayuya with Karin.
6. Tell him Itachi is prettier then him.
They seemed to be discussing something very important for they were speaking in hushed voices and their eyes darted around every so often.
"You have to agree with me that Sakon is hot." Tayuya whispered.
"No way! Juugo is much hotter!" replied Karin.
Well, so much for important…
"But you have to admit that Itachi is the Hottest guy out there right?" Tayuya said giggling like a school girl.
"OMG! You're right! He so much hotter and prettier than Orochimaru." Karin said.
'Itachi is not prettier than me!' Orochimaru thought
"Excuse me, but did you say that Itachi is prettier than me?" Orochimaru asked hopeful that he just misheard.
"You were eavesdropping on us?" Karin asked.
"Well..um…I…" Orochimaru stuttered.
Karin and Tayuya glared at him but answered his question anyway.
"Yes that's what we said, Itachi is defiantly much prettier than you." Tayuya said.
Orochimaru stared at them for a moment more and then walked off to leave the two to their conversation.
"Heh heh heh, we got him good. Did you see the look on his face? He looked so hurt that it was funny." Karin said, holding her hand in front of her face to stifle the giggles that were threatening to rise in her throat.
"Man I can't wait until we do the rest." Tayuya said. "I wonder if we will be able to send him to an asylum after this is over?"
"I don't know but we can try!" Karin said.
Man I am having to much fun with this! I don't know if the next updates will be fast or slow, beceause I still have a project to do over the summer for school.