(Creeps into the spotlight) Um…how ya'll doing? Okay all jokes aside. Sorry for not updating recently and I know you all probably hate me. But I had a brain fart…yeah I didn't come up with it so deal with it. But, I'm going to try and get something going. I don't own Naruto, but I sure as hell wished I did!

Sasori opened and closed his front door quietly so not to wake granny Chiyo. Lord knows if she heard him she would make Sasori do something-"Sasori? Is that you?" Too late. Sasori sighed and walked into the living room. Slowly, mind you. The redhead didn't feel like doing anything but pleasure his blonde. Yet, his unbelievably accurate sense of being watched stopped him from going any farther. Curse his seventh sense. So close but someone had to be watching. Sasori promised himself that he would find and kill the one watching.

"Yes grandmother?" asked Sasori, trying to avoid Chiyo's gaze. Said grandmother looked up from her crocheting and at her grandson. Something's troubling him, she thought. "How was your day, Sasori?" Chiyo asked. Sasori opened his mouth but closed it immediately. Something was up. Granny Chiyo normally asked for Sasori to do something for her, not how his day went. Maybe she's coming down with something…"Um, it was fine I guess…why do you ask?" answered the brown eyed teen. Chiyo chuckled and went back to her crochet. "No reason. Just wanted to know. You can go now, Sasori."

The redhead sighed and bolted for the stairs. "Sasori." called Chiyo. Sasori stopped, practically tripping over his own feet. "I want to meet your girlfriend." Sasori blinked. "Girlfriend?" he wondered. Chiyo laughed aloud.

"You had lipstick on you cheek. I want to meet her. You can do that for me, right?" asked the aged woman. Sasori swallowed hard. Deidara was right, damn all that crap called make up. Damn it all to hell. The blonde didn't get it all off and now Sasori suffers for it. The redhead chuckled nervously. "Uh, yeah sure. I'll bring her tomorrow." Chiyo smiled to herself. "Excellent! I'll have something ready for you two when you arrive." she answered. Sasori nodded and raced up to his room, slamming it shut.

The redhead groaned, banging his head against the wall occasionally. Deidara was going to hate Sasori for this. First, the blonde had to dress up as a girl and now he had to come and meet Sasori's grandmother. Great…just great. Oh well, he'll tell Deidara tomorrow. Hopefully he won't hate Sasori too much.

--Next day--

Deidara was sound asleep in his bed. He was having a delightful dream involving him and Sasori that wants to but can't be mentioned in this story. Just because it couldn't be mentioned doesn't mean Deidara can't think it. The blonde certainly was enjoying it too. Especially since it had to do with whip cream and strawberries.

"Deidara…"

"Ah Sasori, that feels so good." cooed Deidara.

Sasori rolled his eyes and tapped Deidara on the shoulder again. Deidara moaned and rolled over on his side. The redhead groaned. Today wasn't the day to piss him off. But Deidara was doing that already and it was only seven a.m. Konan smirked and pushed Sasori off to the side. She then pulled out a little blue bottle, twisted off the cap, and placed the bottle under Deidara's nose. The blonde sniffed at the unknown smell and shot right up, coughing and wheezing.

"What the hell was that?!"

"One of Britney Spears' perfumes. I think it smells good, actually." answered Konan. Deidara glared at the blue haired girl and looked over at Sasori, who was being emo. The blonde thought he was being emo since today the redhead chose to wear all black, was sitting with his legs close to his body, and was staring at his arm as if to say 'Should I cut this part of my arm or this part?' It was slightly depressing. Or at least it looked it…

"Uh, Sasori-kun?"

"My life sucks, you know that?" claimed Sasori quietly. Deidara and Konan sighed heavily and looked over at one another. "Why's he like that?" asked the blonde. Konan shrugged. "He was like this when I met him at his house. Sasori said something about grandmother…Deidara…meet, something. I really don't know." The blue eyed teen decided to put two and two together to get…well, he wasn't technically sure yet. But he'll figure it out!

"Okay Deidara! Come on, we've wasted enough time as it is. You have to get ready." said Konan after a few awkward minutes of silence. The blue haired girl grabbed her make up bag and started working on the blonde. She picked up some pink eye shadow and was about to put it on Deidara when Sasori cleared his throat, causing Deidara and Konan to look up at him. "I think the blue eye shadow should go on him. It brings out his eyes." admitted the redhead, blushing a little. Konan shrugged and replaced the pink eye shadow with the blue eye shadow.

"I've never thought you'd get into this, Sasori. When your turn came along, you hated it. But with Deidara-""He has to look the part. That's all I care about." growled the Sasori. Konan smirked at Sasori and finished working on the blonde. "Hey brat…" said the brown eyed teen. Deidara looked up. "Yeah?" Sasori narrowed his eyes while glaring at the floor. "My grandmother wants…to meet you." he said, hands clenched in a fist. The blue eyed teen tilted his head to the side.

"Okay."

"But she thinks you're a girl." Deidara turned a bright red and Konan laughed hysterically, clutching her sides painfully. "Uh…o…okay." spluttered the teen, making the blue haired girl laugh harder. Sasori's eye twitched with annoyance. "Konan…are you done?" he asked sourly. The girl looked at Sasori then laughed and looked away. "Hahaha…hahaha!! Yeah, I'm done." finished Konan, giggling one last time. Sasori nodded. "Good. Deidara, you're going to have to keep that make up on and you're going to have to pretend to sound like a girl." he said. Deidara sighed, but nodded. Today was going to be another long day…

--Later on that day--

Deidara's day just sucked. Plain and simple. Why it sucked is also very simple. Deidara plus skirt equals pissed off blonde. Yes, Sasori forced Deidara into a skirt. During the whole thing, Konan was watching and laughing her ass off. Deidara tripped over something and grabbed onto the closest thing: Sasori. He sent them both toppling over and landing in a very, ahem, awkward position. Not that Konan minded. She enjoyed watching the boys fighting and then land on one another into a pose that every yaoi fangirl took joy from seeing. And Konan is, in fact, a yaoi fangirl. Thank Kakuzu and Hidan for that.

Once Sasori got Deidara in a skirt (with leggings), he got Deidara in a black long sleeved shirt with a blood red butterfly on the back. The blonde looked exactly like Misa Amane from that Death Note Movie. And said teen hated it. But…anything for Sasori.

During the day, Deidara, once again, got hit on for being so pretty. You could practically hear people thinking, 'Awww, Deidara-chan is so Kawaii!!' What made it just plain creepy was that Jiraiya-sensei was checking him out. But when Jiraiya realized it was Deidara and once he saw the look of dread on said teen's face, he backed off.

"Rough day?"

"Yeah…" The conversation lasted about five minutes before Jiraiya decided to leave the blonde alone. He was having a bad enough day and talking anymore than he had to would have made the teen's day worse. Ah, what it's like to be young…thought the white haired teacher, remembering his youthful years. Nothing much to remember other than getting the shit slapped out of him by hundreds of girls. And Orochimaru when they were teens for thinking the white skinned pedophile was a girl. Good times…good times.

Lunch didn't make things much better, either. Hidan, like always, had to make it worse.

"So Misa Misa, when's you're next album coming out?" joked Hidan, laughing all the while. Deidara's eye twitched and he glared at the white haired teen. "What?" he asked. "Shut the fuck up." threatened the blonde. Hidan shrugged and went back to his lunch. "I think you make a convincing girl, Deidara-sempai." said Tobi politely. Deidara turned to glare at Tobi but stopped when he remembered something. Poor Tobi doesn't know any better. If he did, he would have known not to say that.

"T…Thank you, Tobi." muttered the blue eyed teen, forcing a smile on his face. The masked teen smiled (at least we think he did) and picked at his food. Kisame 'kukuku-ed'.

"You do look like a girl."

"Do the same as Hidan and shut the fuck up."

And what makes the perfect end to a horrible day? Nothing less of having to meet your boyfriend's grandmother, especially when she doesn't know you're really a boy dressed up as a girl. Yeah…Deidara hated today more than anything. The event named above was delayed for some time, saving Deidara from the embarrassment. Problem was, that is was Tayuya and Kidoumaru that delayed it.

"What do you want?" asked Sasori evilly, crossing his arms. Tayuya snorted. "Don't get you're fucking tighty whiteys in a fucking bunch. We're only here for the cross dressing blonde." Deidara's eyes shone with anger as he gave Tayuya a right hook to the jaw. "I'm not doing this because I want to, bitch. So lay off." answered the blonde. Tayuya wiped away the blood leaking from the corner of her mouth and looked over at the tanned teen standing beside her. "Well? Are you going to fucking stand there or are you going to help me, dammit?!" she complained. Kidoumaru nodded and charged towards Sasori.

Deidara turned to look back at Sasori but soon felt a fist connect with his cheek, forcing him back a few feet. "You shouldn't look away from a fight, mother fucker." sneered the red haired girl. Deidara touched his cheek and cringed at the pain coursing through it. Today's not my day, inwardly groaned the blonde. "What's the matter, you scared? Or are you afraid to get dirty, girly man!" Deidara's head shot up, his eyes iced over with intentions of killing. He rose slowly, glaring a deadly glare at Tayuya. The redheaded girl smirked. "Finally! It's about time you get up-?!" Deidara had punched the girl, blood spilling from her mouth. The blonde then gave Tayuya a hit to the gut and sent her pummeling to the ground. When the girl tried to get up, Deidara stepped on her and kept his foot there. "What now, bitch?" he spat, putting more weight on his foot.

Sasori smirked, watching Deidara the whole time. He didn't know the blonde could lose it that easily. Kind of scary if his anger's directed towards you. "Yo Akasuna, pay attention!" yelled Kidoumaru, stretching his arm out to attack the redhead. Sasori blocked Kidoumaru's punch and gave him a blow to the stomach. The tanned black haired teen felt the wind being knocked out of him. The shorter teen grabbed Kidoumaru's arm and threw him, said teen gasped in pain as his back collided with a wall. "Too easy," complained Sasori. Deidara came up to Sasori, a stupid crazy grin on his face.

"You okay, brat?"

"I'm better than okay. I feel great! Like killing something!" the blonde then laughed loudly. The brown eyed teen rolled his eyes and started walking. "You sound just like Hidan. Just leave them, come on." Deidara shrugged and followed. He didn't care what happened to them, especially after the little present he left them…

A few minutes later, the duo stopped in front of Sasori's door. The redhead turned to face Deidara with dead serious eyes. The blonde simply stared back at him. "Okay," started Sasori, "I need to warn you that my grandmother can read between the lines. So she can find you out." Deidara nodded. "So you have to put on a fake voice and do it well." And then Deidara sighed. But…anything for Sasori, right? "I can do that. I can dig it!" said the blonde enthusiastically. Sasori laughed and shook his head. "Don't do that!" he choked out, opening the door and allowing Deidara in.

"Grandmother, I'm home. Dei-chan's with me." called out the redhead. Deidara looked around the neat home. It had somewhat of a traditional Japanese style to it. The blonde felt…relaxed. "In here, Sasori." responded an elderly woman. Sasori sighed heavily, grabbed Deidara, and led him to the living room. Chiyo was trimming a bonsai tree as the teens came in. "Do you think it looks even?" she asked to particularly no one. Deidara was about to answer but Chiyo began speaking. "Oh, it doesn't matter! I was just doing it to waste time." the elderly woman then chuckled and stood up. She looked Deidara in the eye, almost trying to read him. The blonde just blinked, wide eyed, at the woman, looking completely oblivious. Chiyo then laughed again and stretched out her hand.

"Quite a charming young woman." answered the woman, putting emphasis on 'woman.' Deidara giggled in a girly voice and shook hands with Chiyo. Thank god he chose to wear arm warmers that covered his hands. Sasori sighed, releasing his held breath. So far, so good, he figured. "Let's sit down for some tea, shall we?" insisted Sasori's grandmother. Deidara looked over at Sasori, who nodded, and 'she' sat down, crossing 'her' legs politely.

When Chiyo excused herself to get the tea, leaving Deidara and Sasori alone. Once she was gone, Sasori turned to Deidara, who was uncrossing his legs. "Pretty good huh? Convincible?" wondered Deidara in a cocky manner. The redhead rolled his eyes once more.

"Just don't get cocky. Here she comes." he said, quickly turning back to the doorway. Chiyo came in, trying to balance tea cups, a tea pot, and some food. Deidara, being the kind 'woman' 'she' is, got up and offered to help Chiyo. The elderly woman kindly accepted Deidara's help and placed the tea put and cups on the table, Deidara putting the food down shortly after. Chiyo poured the tea and took a drink from hers, Deidara and Sasori doing the same. "So, how did you two meet?" she asked. Sasori started but Chiyo quickly stopped him. "No Sasori, I want to hear from this young lady."

Deidara looked up from his dango and at Sasori's grandmother. He swallowed and cleared his throat. "Well…" started the blonde. Think, damn you, think, thought both teens inwardly demanded. Deidara then smiled. "I just wanted to be with Sasori. Ever since I laid eyes on him, there was something about him I liked. A love at first sight kind of thing, you know?" 'she' explained, blushing lightly and laughing heartedly. It was a lie but also the truth. A lie because it wasn't love at first sight, but the truth because there is something about him that Deidara likes. Sasori's eye twitched a little at how random the blonde made it. There was no way she was going to believe that!

Chiyo had set down her tea and looked at the blue eyed teen. She searched Deidara's face for any faults, which she didn't find. Hmm, if she is lying, she's doing a good job, thought Chiyo, who outwardly was smiling and nodding. "I always knew my Sasori had that…je ne sais quoi." she answered, patting Sasori on the head lightly. Deidara laughed lightly. I have no clue what that means so I'm just gonna keep laughing, contemplated the blonde. Sasori's eye twitched once again. "'Sori-kun, you should get that eye checked." cooed Deidara jokingly. Sasori glared playfully at the blonde, only because Granny Chiyo was now looking at the redhead, and mouthed 'whatever.' Deidara and Chiyo laughed again, Sasori blushing the whole time.

--A few hours later--

Chiyo certainly was entertaining Deidara. She had told him so many stories about Sasori when he was a baby, that said teen was as red as his hair. The blonde was having so much fun that he didn't want to leave. But Sasori was insisting that he had to get home.

"It was nice meeting you, Dei-chan. I hope to see you again soon." said Chiyo, standing at the door to see Deidara out. Sasori smiled at the blonde and stood on his toes to hug said blonde. "I'll see you later." He said aloud. When Chiyo left for the other room, Sasori whispered, "Good job. Very convincing. Sorry I made you go through that hell." Deidara chuckled. "No way, man. I had fun. Your grandmother's cool." he replied, kissing Sasori on the forehead. Sasori released Deidara and the blonde left for home. The redhead watched the blonde's retreating back and smiled to himself while closing the door.

Sasori walked into the kitchen to assist his grandmother with the dishes. She washed and Sasori dried and put them away. "Such a gentleman tonight." muttered Chiyo while washing a plate. "Thanks." said the redhead. Chiyo smiled.

"Not you, your friend."

Sasori's eyes widened dramatically as he looked at Chiyo. Her face remained emotionless as she washed another dish. "W…What?! Dei-chan is a woman!" stated the redhead. Chiyo chuckled and shook her head. "Or so you were trying to get me to think. I could tell Dei-chan was a boy before I even met him." she explained. Sasori gave Chiyo a hard glare. "Glare all you want, Sasori. I know your 'girlfriend' is really your boyfriend." Chiyo replied. The brown eyed teen stood stone still, glaring off to the side.

"So, what are you going to do? Tell me that it's wrong? That I'm a disgrace?" questioned Sasori. Chiyo glanced to the side and grabbed a dish rag to dry her hands. Instead, she hit Sasori with the dish rag. The redhead stared in a confused manner at the shorter woman. She…she's never hit me!

"Sasori, I can't believe you thought that of me! I would never think of you as a disgrace! If you're happy with Dei-chan, then who am I to get in the way of that?" Chiyo stated, an angry yet calm look on her face. Sasori nodded and looked away, his hair covering his eyes. So many emotions were shown in his eyes, but gratitude was showing above all the others.

The elderly woman laughed, her laugh full of joy. "What? Please don't tell me my though guy Sasori is going to cry?"

Sasori's shoulders shook. He then looked up laughing, a single tear in his eye. "Yeah right! And his name is Deidara…I just call him Dei-chan!" said the teen finally. Chiyo started laughing again. It has been so long since she's last heard Sasori laugh. Such a beautiful laugh too. Deidara must hear it a lot, happily thought the woman.

So, a happy ending to a once thought of bad day is this: Chiyo watched her grandson be happy, Sasori was finally able to rest easy knowing everything's going to be okay, and Deidara is able to take off that horrid make up! But it made it kind of awkward for Deidara when his mother saw him in her clothing. The blonde explained it simply to her, and yet she still doesn't understand. Oh well, she promised not to tell Deidara's dad. To Deidara, that was more than enough.

However, what ever happened to Tayuya and Kidoumaru? Well…

Tayuya blinked and got up from the cold ground, spitting the excess blood out of her mouth. She moved around her jaw and came to the conclusion that it wasn't broken. She stumbled over to Kidoumaru, who was still knocked out. Tayuya groaned and poked Kidoumaru with her foot. "Stupid bastard, get up." she demanded. The black haired teen didn't stir. Tayuya gritted her teeth and kicked Kidoumaru hard in the side.

Kidoumaru groaned and sat up. He looked over at Tayuya, who was glaring down at him. "We lost didn't we?" he wondered. Tayuya snorted. "Naw, he kicked their fucking asses. Of course we lost! Let's go!" the redheaded girl started walking but stopped in front of a little object. "What the hell?" she asked, picking the object up. It was a clay spider slightly bigger than her hand. Kidoumaru glanced over her shoulder and beamed a bright smile. "Cool! A spider!" he said jubilantly.

Tayuya glared over her shoulder. "You and you fucking spiders. Here's what I think of you goddamn spiders!" she threw it down on the ground. And well…saying they were blown away by what happened would be an understatement.

Kidoumaru coughed and sat up. Tayuya did the same and also brushed some debris from her clothes.

"What the-?"

"I'm getting too old for this goddamn shit…"

Okay, really I am sorry for not updating! Please review and forgive me! This is somewhat of a filler but not really since it still applies to the plot in some way. Pretty much, I don't know what the hell I'm doing but I hope you enjoyed it! Again, review if you love me…or at least my writing! (Cheesy grin)