I BLAME FFN for last chapter. It hates my guts.

And I thank those for their reviews: MutantLover09, Hordak's Pupil, FernClaw, Jag Lady

For Andi Mack: My source of MGS inspiration and one of my biggest MGS fans.

5. Feelings

He felt a wet tongue lick his body once more, and Dave groaned, trying to swat away the faithful animal that kept on track with its waking duties. He placed a pillow over his head and tried to blot out last night's dream. The dying breaths she took were more than enough to practically scare the hell out of him, for lack of a better thought. He had woken up in the middle of the night as well, sweating up a storm unlike anything he had ever done before. Dave never sweated.

Aero whined and licked his hand again. Dave was tempted to swat away the husky with the pillow, but he settled for merely looking over at where the young dog was. "Good morning to you, too," he managed to mumble and yawn. "I suppose you have something you wanna say to me, right?"

"DAVE!"

Hal's voice sounded happier than the last time he was watching anime porn on YouTube a couple of days ago. Dave almost wished that it didn't have that sparkle, but he sensed it was for another reason entirely. The older male finally rolled off his bed slightly and gave Aero a small smile before standing up and stretching. He retied his bandana around his head as he exited the room, his companion at his heels. His voice was weary. "What is it, Hal?"

He sounded triumphant. "I've done it! I've really done it! I found it!"

The other man's face twisted into a confused expression. "What do you mean?"

"I found the cure to FoxDie!"

It was like an electric charge ran straight through his body, but it was in the best way possible. Dave seemed to have an easier time breathing suddenly, closing his eyes and allowing a smile to unfurl on his lips. A dream becoming reality for Hal and himself- was this really what he had been waiting for? He felt Aero nuzzle him once more and couldn't hold up from scratching the husky's ears as he trekked out of the room.

Hal looked to be in the clouds as he clicked and typed and grinned with the biggest smile he could muster. Dave knew he had been waiting for this moment for a good couple of months, and it brought him a warm feeling to know that his companion was happy and excited about finding something that would help his friend in any way possible. Frankly, Dave was kind of happy as well. He couldn't believe it.

Maybe he'd finally be cured of his problem of aging and disease.

Dave leaned against the doorway and crossed his arms, smiling. "I bet you're happy."

"I thought you'd be happy."

Something in Hal's quiet tone seemed to smack Dave across the face. The older man cast a curious, angered look over at his companion. "You don't think I'm happy that you found the cure for FoxDie? Hal, I never would have thought it was possible. I thought it wouldn't be found or someone else had taken it. I guess something just threw me off with that idea…" He scratched his head and walked towards the computer. "Do you have any idea where it is?"

Hal sighed and said nothing to this comment.

Dave's stomach churned. "I don't like that sigh."

"I know you don't. And I know you won't like the location of where it could be possibly located." Hal typed in some more things and waited as Dave walked out into the kitchen to get Aero some breakfast. "You've got some memories of it from the past that I know you're not real fond of. Closets, water, and blood…"

The mercenary looked down at the bowl of dog food for the husky and said nothing, but his mind was already screaming ideas. 'OTACON… LIQUID… DEATH…' they told him tauntingly. Dave gave the dog food a sort of sour look before setting it down on front of Aero and scratching her ears once more. He closed his eyes and sighed deeply, a rush of memories once more attacking him. He felt his stomach lurch suddenly. "Damn," he muttered, gripping the counter.

Hal's chair wheeled out of the room and gave Dave a worried look. "What is it?"

"Judging by the subliminal messaging you've been trying to give me, I'm guessing that the cure is somewhere back on Shadow Moses Island," Dave told his companion, his tone overcome with resignation. "And something tells me someone has to go there and get it- that would be me."

The engineer winced. "I didn't say that."

The older man rolled his eyes in exasperation. "You may as well say it flat out and tape a big sign to your forehead about it, Hal. It's plain as day in your eyes."

Hal gave Dave an apologetic look. "It is?"

"I wouldn't have said so if it wasn't the case, would I?"

Hal gave his friend an accusing look. "You were having another nightmare last night, weren't you?"

That threw the man for a loop. He tried to wipe out all traces of a possible confession from his face, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Hal had practically spat the truth back in his face, whether he liked it or not. Dave gave a scowl and uttered a low growl in his throat, earning a whine and a nuzzle from his husky companion. "And if I did? To hell with dreams, Otacon. They don't really do anything but cause pain."

The otaku blinked. "What happened in your dream?"

There was no backing out now. "I dreamt Meryl died again." The man's voice grew softer as he completely untied his bandana it and removed it from his head. "It's odd. I didn't think I'd dream of her dying in front of me again like she nearly did on Shadow Moses. And now… now I have this dream that she gets shot, and I can't do a thing about it." Dave crossed his arms. "What's wrong with me, Hal? It's like… It's like I'm losing myself."

"It only seems like that. What if the dream means something?"

Dave's voice only got more intense, more frustrated. "Oh, please. What the hell could it mean? I could less than a crap about it right now, but it's annoying me to no end." He put a hand up to his forehead and gripped his hair in the front. "God, I don't know what to think right now."

Hal's voice sounded soft, gentle. "Well, I can give you one good piece of news."

Silence, expectancy.

"Meryl's coming to visit. She's on her way here right now."

Dave looked at his friend with a skeptical look in his eyes. "Why? Why would she come and visit us in the cold, barren, deserted forest of Alaska?"

"She wants to help in finding the cure!" Hal told him flatly. "Is that too much to ask?!"

The soldier heaved a sigh. "I don't want her getting involved in something that involves going back there. Who knows what'll happen to her in the way of PTSD?"

The engineer sounded stung. "She's going to be staying here at the house while you go on your little excursion! I didn't plan on her going with you, Snake. She's just an old flame, for Christ's sake- a human being! She's got feelings, too!"

Dave felt his stomach drop once more, scratching Aero from behind the ears. Hal was right. And here he was, being bitter about more help coming in to help find what he had so secretly longed for. His thoughts drifted off to another figure from his past, one who had died in the field of battle before his own eyes. He had watched the body disappear from the earth unlike anything ever witnessed before.

"…I was taken from the battle, neither truly alive, nor truly dead; an undying shadow, in a world of lights…"

Neither truly alive nor truly dead. Dave looked down at the floor, swallowing and shaking his head. "I… I dunno what to say right now."

Hal blinked. That was new.

It didn't take long for him to realize that Dave was in a world of hurt, though, as the older man walked out of the room and sat himself on the chair in the living room, Aero obediently trekking at his heels.

The news of Meryl not only provoked a reaction of unlikely proportion, but a feeling a doubt that Dave had not felt in twelve months.

Eep. Something's going on. Sn-Dave is having some issues. Some bad, mental-tearing-apart issues. YES, I will be calling him Snake again in the fic. –is tired- Do me a favor and tell me your thoughts about this chapter. PLEASE.