Chapter 10: Struggle

What are these bight lights? Where am I at? Where's Elliot? What happened? Let's see the last thing I remember. Elliot was asking If I trusted him and there was some sound that made Elliot turn around for a second and then…um…the rest is a little fuzzy. Ouch, that really hurts. Why does everyone keep touching me? And why is there a tube in my mouth? What's that beeping sound? Wait, it's fading. For some reason I'm starting to feel really tired. I guess I'm just going to take a nap.

"She's crashing, we're losing her. We have to get her in surgery now before it's too late." The doctor was saying to his other colleagues as they were rushing down the hall to the surgery room.

"Liv stay with me. Please don't die on me." Elliot begged while holding her hand the whole time.

"Um sir, you can't go any further." The doctor said and just like that, Olivia was gone.

'Elliot sit down. And stop blaming yourself." Cragen said and Elliot took a seat right next to him. "You can't blame yourself for this."

"Can't I, I let my guard down for one second and the next thing she's clutching her stomach. Why did I take my eyes off her? If I hadn't' she would have never got stabbed."

"Elliot if you feel like you're the blame than so are we." Cragen sighed referring to him, Fin, and Munch. "We were the ones who distracted you. Maybe if we never came at the time we did, everything would be ok."

"Capt, you can't blame yourself for that, you didn't know what was going on and you don't what would have happened if you didn't." Elliot said placing his hand on Cragen's shoulder for comfort.

"My point exactly. You can't know what would have happened and you never will. Those are things that you just have to live with, but right now blaming yourself isn't going to help Olivia. You need to be strong for her beca-why is your shoulder red." Cragen questioned suspiciously looking at Elliot's shoulder.

"Oh…um…I guess my wound open it."

"Wait! What happened to your shoulder?" Cragen demanded.

"I was shot there about a day ago."

"And you didn't get yourself checked out. Elliot, go see one of the doctors."

"No! I'm not leaving until I know Liv is-"

"Elliot, I will come get you once she gets out of surgery, but I'm pretty sure she would want you patched up." Cragen stated calmly.

"OK, but only if you promise you'll come get me."

"I will." Cragen promised and Elliot walked off to go do what he said he would do.

A couple of days had passed by after the doctor told them Olivia's condition. She made it through the surgery, but now she was in a coma. She had internal bleeding and lost a lot of it. Elliot had already got patched up with 6 stitches and now he was sitting in Olivia's room with Fin, John, Cragen and Casey.

It felt like an eternity sitting there waiting for any news on Olivia. The doctors said that they would talk more of a condition after her test results came back but that was a while ago, now it was just complete silence. The silence was making it worse on top of that. No one said anything. They were all thinking of the same thing, Olivia. If she didn't survive and wake up, everything would turn upside down. She was the balance for everything, especially Elliot. She was the one who kept him in check. No one could calm Elliot like Olivia did. They belonged together. As for Cragen, Olivia was like a daughter to him, a daughter he never had. She was a niece to John and a sister to Fin. For Casey, they were practically sisters and best friends. But everything could change with just a snap of the fingers.

"Excuse me; is there ah Elliot Stabler here?" The doctor inquired coming into the room.

"That's me." Elliot said and he stepped out of the room with the doctor.

"Do you know if Ms. Benson was in a relationship with anyone?"

"Um, I guess you can say yea." Elliot said nervously.

"I'm gonna guess that you're the one involved with her right?" The doctor asked and Elliot nodded. "Well, she's pregnant."