Sorry it took so long to update! My muse (also known as new episodes) has not been kind to me lately. Hopefully the next update will be faster. Thanks for reading!
Disclaimer: Ron Moore and Sci-fi own 'em, I don't.
Bill tried to wipe the smile off his face as he marched through the hatch and into the CIC. News travels fast. Bill was acutely aware of how fast. He narrowed his eyes and the smile dropped from his lips. Everyone in the CIC briefly glanced away from whatever task was before them to spy Bill as he entered the room. Even Tigh looked up from the green glow of the view screen to see his friend.
The act in itself was fruitless. His crew was absurd to think even if something did happen last night with the President in his quarters it would show on his face. Of course, nothing had happened and still he entered grinning like a fool. He walked to the large oblong table in the middle of the circling work stations. He heard fingers typing, voices mumbling orders to dock, but everyone was working with one eye on the Admiral. Slowly he spread his arms out and leaned on the command center, sweeping his eyes across his crew. The smile was hidden now, but it was still there.
"Mr. Geata, make sure to get your report on the refugee distribution to Ms. Foster. Dualla, I want you to double check every ship that lands on Galactica. We don't want a repeat of what happened last night," he barked out orders. Then with a turn of his head, and shift of his body he continued.
"And have flowers sent to the office of the President…" He trialed off. Bill was more than a little satisfied to hear actual gasps coming from some of his crew members. He thought Tigh's good eye was going to pop right out of his head.
"Admiral?" Dualla's timid voice hung in the air.
She wasn't the only one shocked and questioning.
"I need to apologize for my crew acting like a bunch of gossiping old bitties. Get back to work," he added.
That would serve them right for letting their minds wonder to the gutter…never mind the fact his had last night. Tigh approached on Adama's left and from the look on his friend's face he was afraid there was some kind of issue with the fleet. So much for a peaceful shift.
Tigh moved closer and finally spoke when no one else was in ear shot.
"Seriously, Bill, why don't you just frak her and get it over with," he friend bluntly stated.
The words shocked Bill only mildly. Saul Tigh had done far more shocking things in the years they had known each other. However, Tigh needed to know the subject of Laura, which had never come up between them before, was not a subject open for debate.
"…because that worked so well for you and Ellen," he said and walked over to one of the work stations.
Tigh didn't follow. Bill knew his friend well enough to understand the insult would soon be forgotten and that Tigh wouldn't bring up Laura anymore.
The rest of his shift was pretty uneventful. Mostly his mind kept wandering back to the eventful night he had. He kept watching the clock. Sharon was gathering information from Colonial One and he had a meeting with Laura to discuss the results. Time dragged by at a turtle's pace. Why did he have to wait all day to see her again? Why was he suddenly missing her as much as he had during the time on New Caprica?
She was close by on Colonial One, and today she was even on Galactica. Still, he missed her. They needed to talk. He was aware of that now. The conversation about the night on New Caprica had been enough back then, but now the time had come to revisit the subject. There was a famous old saying that sprang to his mind since discovering it came from The Courting of Charlotte Astor. Restraint renders a brighter fire. For him the phrase was becoming more and more true.
Finally, the hour for the meeting came. Bill excused himself to his quarters as Tigh mumbled he would be a few minutes late. When Bill entered his cabin he cleaned up a little before everyone started to arrive. There was a moment of panic when he realized Laura's book was under some papers on his desk. He was about to hide the book a little more carefully when Laura stepped into the room.
"Hi," she said simply, with a smile.
She could even make a sweat shirt and sweat pants look good. The goofy grin returned but he pushed it aside. Now was time for business. Before he could say anything, Tom Zarek entered the room.
Bill Adama was pretty sure he hated everything about Zarek. He just wasn't sure why. Not that he didn't have reasons. Oh, he had plenty of reasons, too many to pick one in particular. Form the arrogant swagger of the Vice-President as he stepped into the cabin, to the presumption with which he approached Laura who was just now pulling out the chair in front of Bill's desk. The man was once a hated terrorist and now some people, including Laura, seemed to think of him as some kind of hero. Bill wasn't buying it. Tom Zarek was every bit as much a traitor as Gaius Baltar.
"Madame President, I thought you could use these," Zarek said handing a bundle of cloths to Laura.
For no reason at all, Bill's mood suddenly turned gloomy. Laura accepted the offered package with a smile.
"Thank you, Tom."
Her words were heart felt.
Adama looked toward the back of his quarters, trying to hide the frown tugging at his lips. His clothes weren't good enough for her but Tom's were? Granted, Zarek had brought a black dress skirt and a green blouse more Roslin's style, but Bill couldn't help being annoyed.
Tigh entered through the hatch as Laura excused herself to the head to change out of the casual clothes. Bill was glad Tigh picked that moment to enter because Bill wasn't sure what would happen if he was left alone with Zarek.
"She picked your ship, so she can wear my cloths," Zarek mumbled to Adama with his hands folded across his chest.
The fact Zarek brought up the subject made Bill even more irritated. He pretended like he didn't know what Zarek was talking about.
"Colonel, we're just waiting for Lt. Agathon to arrive with the latest news from Colonial One," Bill said, sending Zarek a hard stare.
"You know," Zarek began, stepping toward Bill with his shoulders back, "the thing that really gets me is you have her and you don't even want her."
Adama watched Tigh lift an eyebrow at the remark. Bill clenched his fist and did his best not to punch Zarek between those beady little eyes. He couldn't for two reasons. One, he would be acknowledging that he knew what Zarek was talking about and two, he would be admitting to something he wasn't sure he was ready to admit.
"Want who?" Tigh questioned looked at Adama.
There was a long pause as each of the three men exchanged glances. Tigh was confused, though, perhaps not that confused. Zarek was accusing and Adama was as furious as if Tigh had just walked in the room and announced he was a cylon.
"The Astral Queen," Zarek finally said. He unfolded his arms and smiled.
Adama took a little pride in knowing the vice president just backed down from whatever fight he was about to start.
"She could have handled a lot more refugees from Colonial One. Next time don't hesitate to ask for our help," Zarek explained eyeing Tigh and Adama carefully.
Bill un-clenched his fist and let himself relax, though he knew far too well what Zarek was really talking about. He suspected Tigh did too.
"What's going on?" Laura asked innocently as she came back into the room.
Bill was still glaring at Zarek, who was looking down at something on his shoe. Tigh had his hands on his back and his jaw open as he eyed Adama.
"Just discussing emergency evacuation procedures," Adama told her.
When he faced her he had to physically force himself not to look at her legs, which were much more visible now. The effort required not to look was like trying not to eat a frost covered ice cream cone on a hot day near the beaches of Caprica. Maybe the clothes Zarek brought weren't that bad after all….
Laura's eyes narrowed and Bill knew she didn't completely buy what he was selling. To his relief she let it pass. Before the conversation started again, Sharon entered.
"Sorry I'm late," she began then turned to the superior officers, "Admiral, Madame President." Her head dipped slightly as she addressed each of them.
Adama couldn't help but feel a swell of pride for Sharon. Here she was an outcast among her closest friends and yet she still paid them all a great deal of respect.
"Okay," Sharon began gaining the attention of everyone in the room, "Looks like the gas leak wasn't a leak at all. There was a hole cut in one of the air vents and we found traces of trioxide inside."
"Trioxide?" Tigh said, surprised.
Bill exchanged a look with his first officer.
"Isn't…isn't that a by-product of the tylium refining process?" Laura asked, pushing her glasses up as she spoke.
Laura makes glasses look so sexy, Bill thought and then shifted his wait from one leg to the other to keep his focus on the conversation.
"Yes," Sharon answered, "when heated it releases toxic gases."
"So, someone was trying to put everyone on Colonial One to sleep permanently," Zarek mused with a hand on his chin.
Bill smirked. Zarek always talked like he was the hero in some cheesy B-movie.
"Someone, or me," Laura added.
"You think this was an assassination attempt?" Tigh asked, looking at Roslin in surprise.
"It could have been a terrorist act," Zarek said.
"You would know," Adama mumbled a little more loudly then he meant to.
He drew a sharp, irritated stare from Laura.
"What does that mean?" Zarek questioned, the fight was somehow back on between them.
When Bill didn't answer Zarek stood up straighter, insulted.
"You think I did this?!" Zarek's voiced grew in volume as he approached Adama.
Bill stopped leaning on his desk and stood up to meet Zarek face to face.
"You are capable of it. You're one heartbeat away from the Presidency," Bill accused.
"Unbelievable! You think I would do anything to hurt her," Zarek retorted his voice still carrying through the room.
"You've tried it before," Bill snapped.
"That was never proven. Besides, I don't want to be president."
"You expect us to believe that?"
"You're frakking right I do! What the hell is your problem?"
"You are."
"Me, or her?" Zarek gestured toward Laura with an outstretched hand.
Laura startled a little in surprise.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Bill demanded.
"You frakking know what it means!"
"Gentlemen, please, control yourselves. This is getting us no where," Laura yelled above their voices.
Bill stepped back and took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. He was surprised by his violent reaction. When he looked up Bill saw Laura's mouth was slightly opened and she seemed shocked. She sent them a look that said clearly, if you speak again you're both going out the airlock.
"Lt. Agathon," Laura began slowly, her voice calm, "Any leads yet on who might have done this?"
Sharon, with a half smirk was looking from Zarek to Adama and back again. Then her gaze landed on Laura and Bill could tell she was highly amused by what just happened. This argument combined with what she had seen last night…Bill stifled a groan.
"Uh…the…team we put together is heading over to the tylium ship as we speak. Whoever did this must have had access to the trioxide deposits. We are also checking the daily log from Colonial One. Anyone who docked in the last three days is being questioned," Sharon explained.
"Any guesses on how long before we can move back?" Laura questioned.
Bill was a little stung to hear the desperation in her voice. Maybe she didn't enjoy last night as much as he did. He smiled because that thought sounded so much dirtier than it really was.
"Three or four days. It takes a while for the toxins to clear out of the furniture, clothes and stuff like that," Sharon replied.
"We get to go back. That is the important thing. Keep us informed," Laura said with a smile.
Sharon nodded and looked to the Admiral.
"Also, we did some moving around. Helo has the night shift this week so, you're welcome to stay in my quarters, if you want. I have an extra cot. The Admiral said you might be interested."
"Yes, I would," Laura said, half distracted by glaring at Adama.
"Madame President, are you sure that's wise?" Zarek questioned, drawing a hard stare from Sharon.
"Lt. Agathon saved my life last night. You're not going to try and kill me in my sleep tonight are you?" Laura said, turning to Sharon playfully.
"Let's get one thing straight up front. I hate you, okay. I. Hate. You. You stole my baby and I will always hate you for it, but I don't go around murdering my President or the leader who I believe will guide us to Earth. I can offer you a place to stay, but that doesn't mean I have to like you," Sharon said.
The honest in her voice cut through the air like a cylon raider. Adama implicitly trust Sharon. There was a time he might have feared Sharon would do something to hurt Laura but there was some connection between them he didn't understand and he knew Sharon, as much as Laura, wanted to get to the bottom of it.
"Fair enough," Roslin replied, causing Zarek to frown.
"I can show her where it is. Thank you Lieutenant, you're dismissed," Adama told Sharon.
As Sharon began to leave she was stopped by Roslin's voice.
"Lieutenant. All of the passengers on Colonial One owe you their lives, including me. That's twice now. Thank you," the President said.
She put special emphasis on the last two words.
Adama watched Sharon's eyes display a dozen different emotions. Hatred and heartbreak and perhaps even a little forgiveness were among them. The cylon was clearly surprised but she shook off the words and saluted the President before stepping into the corridor.
No one spoke, but Bill took a deep breath as he watched Laura turn to face them. He could almost see it coming. She was mad, that much was clear by her tense shoulders and the thin line that formed her lips.
"What the hell is the matter with the two of you?" she scolded in her school teacher voice.
Even though she asked the question, Bill was sure Laura had some idea what was going on and that she really didn't want to know the answer.
"You might not like each other but we have to work together. All of us have pasts. All of us will disagree at one point or another but we are the leaders of the fleet. We set the example. Respect and common politeness still matter. Am I right?"
Zarek again looked down at his shoe and Adama clasped his hands in front of him.
"Well?" Roslin demanded an answer.
"Yes," Adama mumbled, feeling like he was back in kindergarten.
Roslin could be hard core when she wanted to be.
"Good," she spat and exhaled loudly.
"We have plenty of room on the Astral Queen, if you'd rather stay there," Zarek offered abruptly.
He didn't seem phased by Roslin's lecture which did nothing to ease Bill's already hot temper.
"Thank you, no. I'm fine here," Laura said not altogether warmly.
She avoided eye contact with Zarek much to Adama's pleasure.
"I'm late for another meeting," Zarek said. "Admiral, I apologize for my behavior."
Zarek put out a hand and smiled at Adama. Bill grudgingly took the offered hand, knowing full well the only reason Zarek was apologizing was to show Laura what a good little vice president he could be. Frakking politician.
As Zarek tried to pull away Bill held onto his hand, warning him not to play with fire. Bill could almost feel Roslin roll her eyes at the gesture.
Once Zarek was gone, Tigh, who had all but turned invisible up to this point, cleared his throat.
"I know you two probably have a lot to discuss…Bill, good luck," Tigh began with a wide teasing smile.
Bill smiled back but Roslin just managed to look more pissed off.
"You're point, Colonel," she urged, dryly.
"The cylon in the brig gave us some useful data in tracking cylon ships. Gaeta is trying to update our computers right now. Just thought you should know. I wouldn't have done it, but I guess she appreciated having the shackles off," Tigh said.
He started toward the door and Adama was about to stop him but from the look on Roslin's face he could tell she was guilt ridden. He heard the door shut and now it was his turn to get mad at her.
"You went to see the cylon," Bill said, trying to keep the anger out of his voice until he got a confession.
"Yes," Laura answered simply.
He looked down at his hands until Laura suddenly took a few steps across the room. Zarek must have forgotten to bring her shoes, because she was barefoot.
"Why keep it from me?" he asked, this time his voice was a little more demanding.
Laura sighed and turned around to face him with her hands clasped behind her back.
"Because, you have never been interested in my…dreams, visions, hallucinations, whatever it is you call them," she said.
"The cylon is dangerous," Bill scolded.
"No more so than Sharon. She wouldn't hurt me," Laura replied quickly, "In fact, I believe she saved my life last night just as much as Lt. Agathon."
"Let me guess, your basing this off of more than a feeling, a hallucination?" he asked.
Of course, that was the exact wrong thing to say. Roslin made a noise somewhere between a growl and a sigh and threw up her hands.
"If you need me, I'll be in Sharon's room," she said.
"You don't know where it is," he replied, giving her a hard stare of his own.
"I'll manage," she snapped as if he were a child.
To Bill's surprise instead of walking toward the door she marched over to his desk. With little ceremony she tossed some papers around and…Bill's heart jumped to his throat. She picked up the book, her book. She knew about that? She must have found it last night.
"I'm taking this," she hissed at him.
As she walked by he caught her arm. Her hair flew over her shoulder as she turned her head to face him.
"I'm not finished with it," he growled.
"You stole it," she replied with the same tension in her voice.
"I borrowed it just like you've done with half my library," he responded, tightening the grip on her arm. Her face was only inches from his.
"Let me go," Laura demanded.
"Why? So you're free to have more secret meetings with the cylon without telling me," he asked.
Laura narrowed her eyes.
"No," she said smugly, "So you're free to go beat up Zarek and make your masculine pride feel better. Then maybe you'll stop acting irrationally."
"No, you have the market cornered on that, Madame President," Bill replied.
Laura was silent for a long few minutes. Some of the tension keeping her eyes sharp and jaw clenched filtered away.
"Why are we arguing?" Laura sighed, her tone now more weary than angry. Adama didn't move.
"Because restraint renders a brighter fire."
They stood staring each other down. Eyes locking, each holding secrets neither of them dared confess. The stare was so intense that this time for a reason unknown Adama felt her eyes pulling him toward her. His head inched closer to hers, his eyes focused on her lips. Things moved agonizingly slow. Although Bill felt like he was getting closer to hers there still seemed to be an enormous distance between them. He knew if they didn't make contact soon he would lose his nerve.
Then, as he continued gaining ground he felt Laura move the slightest bit toward him. She moved and he could feel her breath. He moved and he could smell his shampoo on her hair. They both continue to pull together, the space between there lips decreasing slowly. Bill leaned in as far as he was willing to go and waited to see if Laura would go the rest of the way. This was getting very close to the line but Bill couldn't do anything to stop it.
She did not hesitate, not even for a second. He knew she was fully aware of what she was doing. He felt her soft lips touch his own. Her tender kiss was unlike anything he had ever experienced. Bill couldn't remember the last time he had kissed a woman but he did remember no kiss had ever made him feel like this. There was barely enough to Laura's kiss to make him think it was not a platonic gesture.
Laura's kiss. Just the sound of those two words together was like standing at the base of an erupting volcano. This was playing with fire. This was holding a flame; this was daring to control it. Adama had to put it out but he was tantalized by the flickering light, the warmth, the passionate burn from getting too close. The restraint and the pull he felt both at once.
He loosened the grip on her arm and felt her hand melt into his chest. He kissed her a little more fervently, just to confirm to himself she really intended the kiss the way he did. Fire was igniting them and the surroundings. For one suspenseful moment Bill thought the carpet beneath would shoot up sharp hot flames too. When she didn't pull back he was suddenly alarmed. Warning bells were ringing in his head and he couldn't silence them.
This was a bad, bad thing they were doing. Yes, they were doing it slowly and carefully. Yes, they were doing it well. Yes, it was just about the best experience Bill could remember since Lee got his wings. Yes, it was barely more than a simple kiss but it was so much, much more. Despite all his rationalizations the warning bells rang and rang. The fire was almost hot enough to drown out the pounding ring.
Warning bells must have been ringing for Laura too because she slowly and softly pushed him away. She stepped back without looking at him and walked to the corner of his office. He could hear her breathing heavily and he focused on steadying his own rough breathing. Not until they broke apart did he realize just how intensely they had been going at it.
So, that's what it was like to jump into the middle of a nuclear explosion, he thought to himself. It might not have been so bad to be on the Colonies when the cylons attacked. Her kiss was like the world coming to an end. Complications were coming now. Just like after the attack on the Colonies.
"We could pretend like that didn't happen," he offered, when Laura continued to face away from him.
She turned halfway around and put her hands on her hips. As she spoke she looked down at the floor.
"But it did, unless you want to forget it," she replied, barely above a whisper.
"No," he said quickly.
Her eyes focused in on him. There was silence again.
"I'm sorry I embarrassed you in front of Zarek," Adama apologized.
"Zarek can be a chauvinist. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about seeing the cylon," she said matching his apology with her own.
"Last night was…," Bill searched for the right words but couldn't find them.
Laura finally looked up at him and she was wearing a soft smile.
"Like on New Caprica," she said, tilting her head as she spoke.
Bill smiled and took in a deep breath. He folded his arms across his chest and went back to leaning casually on the front of his desk.
"If we were on the Colonies we could pursue this like normal people. Go to the theater, or a pyramid game, dinner, maybe even home to meet my mother," Bill said a little playfully.
"Hmmm, yes to all but the last one," she replied holding his gaze.
Her smile was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen.
"She'd have loved you," Bill said, suddenly aware he had brought the word love into the conversation. "She never really liked Carolann that much. She was softer, tried to always find the good in life, but strong, unbendable, like you…"
Laura briefly glanced down and then wearing a grin she brought her head back up.
"Bill Adama you amaze me. Half the fleet accuses me of being a cold hearted shrew, and you call me soft," she said.
"You do your job. I didn't mean to insult you," Bill said feeling sheepish.
"No, it's just…" Laura trailed off.
Bill watched her take a few steps toward him and flip her hair back over her shoulder. She was obviously thinking very hard about whether or not to say something. She took a deep breath, and he tried to encourage her with a warm smile.
"I feel like I've become more adept at make political decisions. When I started I was green, oh, Lords, I was green. I've gotten smarter, the fleet has come together in a way I never thought they could…"
Bill could feel she was building towards something that hadn't come out yet.
"But," he encouraged.
"But," she said after a long sigh, "Whenever we learn something new there comes with it a loss of innocence. Before the attacks there were things I liked about myself that I've had to turn away from in order to do the job."
Bill was thoughtful for a moment. He gestured for her to join him on his sofa. The conversation was interesting and he felt there was a lot more to be said, if not in words than in looks.
"For instance…" he said as they sat on the sofa in unison.
Laura leaned an arm on the back of the soft leather and tucked one of her legs underneath her.
"I used to be…nicer to people, you know, friendlier, more trusting, perhaps," she explained as her eyes narrowed and she looked over Bill's shoulder.
"War hardens the best of us," he said, meaning her to be the best. She shook her head.
"Not you," she replied. "You have such generosity Bill. I don't doubt that every member of this crew knows you care about them. They wouldn't serve you with such loyalty if they didn't."
Bill shrugged.
"Lee might have an argument for you on that point," he said.
"What does he think about us?" She questioned, so out of the blue Bill nearly slipped off of the sofa.
"Us?" He repeated choking out the word.
Laura remained collected and as calm as a still clear lake.
"He didn't seem pleased last night when he thought we…" her feathers ruffled a little as she trailed off.
He was glad to see her cold professionalism was still a little shaken by the nature of the subject. His heart was pounding in his head.
"Maybe he was only sorry he disturbed us, he apologized to me a lot," Bill said managing to calm himself a little.
"And Kara, what does she say?" Laura questioned again. Bill shook his head.
"I'm sorry, why are we discussing this?" He asked, trying to get a grasp on the conversation, while his mind wandered along the hem of her skirt and he thought about grasping other things.
"If we do pursue a relationship, there are certain people who will have to know. People who will have to be trusted. I do think it's possible to keep it a secret from the press and the majority of the fleet but not from those closest to us," Laura said, much to Bill's surprise.
He smiled to himself. She had always been the one to push for a relationship. In a way, her willingness wasn't a surprise. Everyone she had ever loved since the attacks, Elosha, Billy, had all died. She was lonely. He could see it in her eyes and it made his heart break for her in much the same way it did that day he heard her muffled sobs over the body of her young aid. Despite all she had lost she was still willing to take another chance.
"Nothing stays a secret forever," he told her firmly.
"Doesn't it?" She asked, with a broad smile and a dozen or so secrets floating in her eyes.
He would have given his ration supply for the next two weeks to know what secrets she was keeping. Really, he didn't know much about her before the attacks, he wasn't sure anyone really did.
"You're my superior officer. I could be court-martialed," Bill said.
"And I could lose all credibility with the press. People would say you were offering me physical favors in exchange for promises," Roslin replied.
Bill lifted an eyebrow at her use of the word 'physical.' It was like she was purposely avoiding another word.
"We both know that wouldn't happen," Bill was quick to say.
Even his respect for her had not tempted him to let Baltar suffer for crimes the President couldn't prove. He was sure a physical relationship with her would only cause them grief personally, not professionally. Laura sighed and shook her head.
"It's a matter of understanding how much this means to us, how much we are willing to give up for it. We have to lead the people to Earth. We are the only ones who can. You. Me. Us, together. No matter what the cost…do you remember that, from Kobol? What if the cost isn't in lives this time but in what we want for ourselves?" Laura's face was relaxed but her smile had faded.
"You've given this some thought," Bill replied, hoping his half smile would cheer her up a bit. She only nodded and looked sadly over his shoulder.
"We have as much right to be happy as anyone else. But, we can't just live life as people because we aren't just Laura and Bill. You are the President. I'm the Admiral. How much can we afford to lose for what we want? I have to think, it can't be much."
He hated himself for saying the words, but they were true. As if to somehow make up for the harsh words, he took on of her hands in his and let it rest there.
"So, where does that leave us?" she asked as she nodded her head slowly.
He looked into her eyes for a few minutes and then brushed a hair back behind her ear. Looking down he took the book out of her hand.
"I don't know, I haven't finished reading it yet," he said.
"You won't like the ending," she informed him.
"…I think we forget sometimes, it's about the journey, not the ending," he replied.
Laura looked like she was about to say one thing and then changed her mind.
"Let me know what you decide."
To Bill's utter surprise she leaned in and kiss him lightly on the lips for a small instant before leaning back. Warmth again flooded him as he realized that Laura was all for pursuing a relationship. The decision was his now. The two of them smiled at each other like two dreamy eyed love-struck adolescent kids before Bill stood.
"Shall we?" He asked, offer her his arm. She took it and he enjoyed her pleasant mood all the way to her new sleeping space.