Chapter 13: Remaining Friends
After selling his papers, David headed to the train yards but Grim wasn't there. He asked the employees if they seen her and they said they haven't. The again, hundreds of people come through here a day. How can they be so cure they didn't see her? David had no way of knowing if they were right or not. Instead, he went to the lodging house to see if she was there.
He found Grim sitting on the steps outside the lodging house with her head in her hands. He was relieved to see her that she was there but he still wasn't sure if he wanted to see her. Before he can figure out how he feels about her, she looks up and saw him. He slowly went over to her and sat next to her on the step.
" Jack said that you left. Your suite case was gone." David said, without looking at her,
" I went to Zelda's place but I'm back now."
" Why did you take your suite case?"
" I was thinking about leaving the city," She sighed, " I'm so sorry, David. I realized that I was using my past as an excuse to keep myself at arms length from you and, believe me, I am not playing games with you. I would never do that to you."
" Grim, what's wrong? You seem…I mean I know you're upset but you seem different." he said searching her face.
" I kissed Spot." she said quietly.
" You kissed spot?" he repeated as he looked away from her, " how can you kiss Spot when you can't show me anything? I thought you hated him."
" I do hate him. I can't stand him and, no. we aren't alike."
" Then why. Grim?"
" I don't know. I don't know what happened."\ I just wanted to talk to him and… I'm so sorry, David. I really am."
" I don't know what to say, Grim. I guess I shouldn't even get angry with you." he said coldly.
"What do you mean?"
" You're not my girl. You can kiss whoever you want and maybe you want to be with Spot."
" Why would you say that?"
" Think about it , Grim." he snapped at her, " you can't kiss me. You can't even tell me that you care about me but it doesn't take you that long to kiss Spot. Maybe you wanted to. Maybe you don't want me."
" Maybe I don't, David." she said quietly. " maybe we're better off as friends."
David stared at her blankly. He knows she didn't mean that but maybe they should remain friends. It's clear she cant handle a relationship, he thought. There's probably someone out there for him and she can't stop him from looking. David reached into his pocket and took out Grim's change purse.
" Here." he said as he handed her the change purse.
" What are you doing?" She asked
" I'm giving it back to you. I don't need it."
" David, this is yours. I don't want it back."
" I don't need you help. Thank you but I don't need it. I can find money on my own."
" What…what am I suppose to do with this? I don't need it." she said staring at the purse.
" What is wrong with you, Grim? Do you not see anything that's right in front of your face? You have money now. You can go anywhere you want and get whatever you want. Why don't you get the hell out of the city? Take the money and get yourself a better life.
" Maybe I will." she said then she left the lodging house steps.
Daivd watched Grim walk quickly down the street. He did need the money but he wanted her to take it to better herself. If she gets out of the city. Then she can live a better life on her own and he'll be able to stop thinking about her. He'll be able to forget that he ever met her, that he ever loved her . He can be himself again. Depressed and penniless.
Grim rushed down the street trying to get as far away from David as she possibly can. She didn't want him to give the money back. It was his. She spent so much time trying to get it and he just hands it back lime it was nothing. That was her way of showing him that she does care about him. She was so lost in her thought that she bumped into someone and dropped her change purse.
" Would you watch where you're going?" she snapped at the person who was picking up the purse.
" Oh, it's you, Doll…Grim." it was spot. He held out the hand that was holding the purse, " you really should be careful with your money. Any one will run off with this."
"Thanks. I'll remember that." she said as she took it and put it in her pocket of her skirt, " what are you doing here?"
" I'm going to Tibby's and have lunch with Jack. Are you okay? You seem…distracted." he pointed out.
" Um…David doesn't want me anymore. I told him what happened and he doesn't want me anymore. He want nothing to do with me. This is just great. Everything I touch just turns to dirt." she said and Spot just stared at her. " Aren't you going to say anything?"
"I'm not going to feel sorry for you. That's life. So, David doesn't want you. Move on." he answered.
" Move on? That's your answer? I'm sorry, Spot, but I just can't move on. You can't move on from someone you care about."
" I understand that but there's no use dwelling on it." he jumped in.
" Are you kidding me? I just told him a few minutes ago and now, I should forget about him? All in a few minutes time? I don't know about you, spot, but I'm human. I don't work that way."
Spot looked away from her. She expected him to say something even if it's something at her expense but he didn't say anything. Grim didn't know anything about him either. She doesn't know that he knows exactly what she's going through because he's been there. He grew up without the love of parents because his mother died when he was young and his father was a dead beat. He taught himself to remain cold and guarded. He only opens himself up to girls he's with because he saw how his father treated his mother and he told himself he would never treat them like that, like they were his property. Grim sighed and was about to walk away when he stopped her.
" I'm trying to teach toy how to survive, Grim." he said, still not looking at her.
" I'm not going to spend the rest of my life out here, Spot. I'm not going to become like you."
" I don't want you to become like me." he said angrily, " I don't have anything to my name. I have no one to come home to. You had David but you screws it up. You screwed it up way before we kissed this morning. You had to keep pushing him away and now you want me to feel sorry for you."
" I know I screwed up!" she yelled. When she saw that people we looking at them, she quickly walked into an ally and Spot followed behind. " I am well aware about hoe I treated David and I don't need to be reminded about it every time we meet."
" I'm trying to get it through your head that David is the only person out here that'll care for you. You go running around the streets asking people to help you figure out how to feel about someone and they'll laugh in your face.
"How did you get like this, Spot?" she asked which surprised the both of them.
" Don't worry about how I turned out." he answered.
" What do you tell these girls?"
" You better be careful, Grim." he warned. " I'll let you talk all you want but you're pushing it."
" What are you afraid of, Spot? Are you afraid to show me that you're human and you're not as coldhearted as you want people o think you are?"
" I tell them about my life!" he yelled, " I tell them about my childhood! I tell them how my father would beat me and my mother when he was drunk and how he raped her almost every single night. I tell them that I want to get out of that hell hole of a lodging house one day and that I have dreams of my own. I tell them everything!"
Grim didn't know what to say. She was expecting her to tell her the truth. She was trying to search her mind to find something to say when Spot began kissing her forcefully pushing her against the wall. After a moment, Grim pushed him away and they were breathing heavily. They stood close to each other and stared at each other in silence.
" What the hell is wrong with you?" she finally said.
" Nothings wrong with me." he answered
" Why do you keep doing that? Do you want me or something?"
" Don't get so full of yourself, Doll Face." he said but his facial expression said differently.
" Spot, I…I want David and you can't change my mind."
" I wasn't trying to change anything. You want David then go and get David." he said angrily as he left the ally.
Spot quickly headed to Tibby's. why do I keep doing this?, he thought. He really doesn't want Grim or, at least, that's what he's telling himself he has never met anyone who would talk back to him the way she does. There is something about her that he likes but David is the closest thing to a friend that he has. He has to snap out of this and occupy himself with something else. The meeting is tonight. He'll just think about that.