I Couldn't Help Myself. (Secret Notes – Part 2)

I couldn't help myself. I wish I didn't love her but I did! Why? What was so special about her that made me want to be with her for the rest of my life? Last night was great, I admit. But today not so much. I asked her to the ball last night. She said no. My heart broke. It shattered into a million pieces. I thought we were suppose to be together forever! But clearly I was wrong. She didn't want me so why should I want her? But I just couldn't help myself.

I wanted to run, break free. But I couldn't. I couldn't leave Naomi by herself. I couldn't do that to her! Leave her alone in this cold hearted world. She'd hate me for it. I couldn't have her endure the endless amount of scoldings and tantrums she would receive from my sister, claiming I left her and didn't want her. But that wasn't true. I wanted her more then anything, I wanted everybody to know about us! But Naomi refused. She said she wasn't like me and she didn't want to do that. was getting apprehensive, shaking about the fact the relationship between me and Naomi was going to be over. But it wasn't.

It was morning and I had just woken up. Breakfast in kitchen.

"Katie. Katie! Katie!?" I yelled. Where was she?

"Right here!"

"Huh?" I walked into the living room. She was on the cough, lying down. "What's wrong?"

"Everything, everything!" I sat down right by her. "Emily?"

"Yeah," I responded. What was she going to ask?

"Freddie, he doesn't like me anymore. Doesn't feel the need to be with me. What should I do?"

"I don't now." What was I suppose to answer?

"Well you should now! You're my sister! We're practically the same." No we are not.

"We are not the same Katie! You and me are completely different," I responded again. This time I might have been too harsh.

"What?" Her face was indescribable. She had sort of a shocked, gobsmacked look added in with confusion.

"You heard me. You heard me loud and clear." Ouch, what was I doing?

"Emily, I suggest you shut up now."

"No! I will not shut up!"

"Emily."

"While you go get hit by a rock by some loser I will be hear drinking me tea." Silence.

"Go. Now." I gave her one last look and left. This wasn't going very well.